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Tricky transgender conversation with a child...


My eight year old son keeps asking to visit a friend whom I've been attempting to contact for a couple years now each time he asks to see them. The mother is a fun-loving Christian(as far as I know) who used to have him over for sleepovers with her son who is a few years older than mine. He's always asking to visit the mother though. She was always the cool mom/babysitter. I miss her as well. But since I last contacted her I learned her teenaged girl has become transgender. My son used to see her daughter every Sunday at our old church and she used to help with the kids often. I'm not ready to talk to my homeschooled 8 year old about LGBQT.... anything yet. It's hard enough going into the birds and the bees as it is (though we've had many age appropriate ones as my husband and I see fit). But her daughter looks very different and calls herself a different name. How do I explain that his friend insists on being called a different gender and name without totally confusing him?

Edited by Maeroj
Wrong word order

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It's definitely time to have that talk whether he sees this friend or not.

I taught in public schools for 32 years and am currently the president of a local school board.  I do know that there are rare places across the United States where ungodly things are taught, but it's not rampant among public schools.  We aren't the devil like some are taught we are, but that's another thread.

You can just simply tell him that sometimes these days there are young people who want to live as the other gender.  They change their names, their clothes, and sometimes their bodies.  But that really doesn't change whether they are a boy or a girl.  Tell him that they are born and boy or girl and that's how God made them no matter how much they try to believe they are changed.  This is would be an ideal time to discuss the Biblical truth that the devil is the Father of Lies and how his lies can really, really harm people and lead them down a path of shame, sin, pain, and away from God.

Tell him that this confusion over who they are causes them much pain in their hearts and minds and many of these young people are hurting.  They need prayer.  You can tell him about his friend and pray with him for his friend.  

One thing I can tell you for certain.  Even at 8, he knows more than you think he knows and had been exposed - yes even as a homeschooler - to more than you think he has.  Do  you own a television?  Even commercials for ALL programs contain questionable material.  Have you been present at every conversation he has had with every friend?

Conversations like these are not easy.  But they are vital.  And since he now knows someone who is transgender [even though you haven't told him], now would be an ideal time to have that simple conversation in terms of scripture and God's purpose for humanity.

Edited by Jayne
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3 hours ago, Maeroj said:

 How do I explain that his friend insists on being called a different gender and name without totally confusing him?

I've been setting here trying to put words to it and arguing with myself about it...  I can't put myself in your position for our kids went to public schools and would come home and ask questions....   made my life a bit easier in this sense.   The one big thing that you want to do is to make sure that your kids (ever how many there are and will be) can always come to you and ask any questions with no boundaries on the subjects...…   that is really critical.    It is important that he/they come to you for clarification when they are confused about things.

If you are going to let him visit, maybe it's time to talk with him about it so he understands the Christian side of things and not be swallowed up in the world.  But if you are not going to let him visit he deserves to know why also....    and that leads me to think, maybe it's time to have that talk.


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Hi, @Maeroj

Welcome to Worthy, by the way, since this is your first post. I understand the natural reluctance of not wishing to address things of sexuality, much less issues of homosexuality, lesbianism, and transgender with your son yet. He's only 8 years old. Thank God he's being home schooled, as the agenda is already being implemented into USA's public system as it is at that age. Shocking but true. If you aren't making plans for your son and this older friend of his to make contact again soon, I wouldn't worry about that yet. Pray about it, as I'm sure you will. There may be some Christian books about this topic out there, no doubt. God bless you, I know this is no easy thing to discuss. 



Edited by BeauJangles
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  1. You have a 'situation' on your hands. Before I was banished, I would NEVER let my kids overnight.
  2. But the LGBT agenda is horrifically prevalent and schools in the UK are forced to teach it, like in CA.
  3. We should not even speak of evil like this, let alone discuss it as if it were a reasonable topic.
  4. Oh brother/sister... it is a long and pit-strewn path you now must tread.
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Honesty is always the best policy.

Explain in simple words that some people think they are in the wrong body and want to have their bodies changed.

May I suggest that you do not reestablish contact with this family.

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