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Having faith in difficult times


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I really appreciate everyone's encouraging words. I need it every single day. I come back and reread when I'm really feeling alone, stressed and scared. 

Husband just had his 3rd round of chemo and he is really struggling with it.  I know he feels awful and I know I truly don't know how he feels just know by what others say about it and I know it's bad. Lately my fear is that he will not finish chemo, he keeps saying he doesn't want to do it anymore. Am I wrong to be angry with him having those thoughts? I mean it can be life or death, he just keeps saying he's so tired of feeling sick all the time and doesn't think he can make it the whole six months. He also says there is no guarantee that it wont come back even with chemo but I keep explaining he has a better chance but he's right we don't know. I'm so afraid if he chooses to stop. Praying a lot but I don't really know what is appropriate to pray for, him to make the best decision for him self? pray he will keep doing chemo? thanks again for all the encouraging words.

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3 hours ago, worriedwife69 said:

I really appreciate everyone's encouraging words. I need it every single day. I come back and reread when I'm really feeling alone, stressed and scared. 

Husband just had his 3rd round of chemo and he is really struggling with it.  I know he feels awful and I know I truly don't know how he feels just know by what others say about it and I know it's bad. Lately my fear is that he will not finish chemo, he keeps saying he doesn't want to do it anymore. Am I wrong to be angry with him having those thoughts? I mean it can be life or death, he just keeps saying he's so tired of feeling sick all the time and doesn't think he can make it the whole six months. He also says there is no guarantee that it wont come back even with chemo but I keep explaining he has a better chance but he's right we don't know. I'm so afraid if he chooses to stop. Praying a lot but I don't really know what is appropriate to pray for, him to make the best decision for him self? pray he will keep doing chemo? thanks again for all the encouraging words.

I am so very sorry to read the dilemma you are facing. I had Chemo too.

I recall two people, husband and wife, mountain climbing. They became lost and six days had passed, and they became almost delirious without water or food. They stumbled across a water hole, but the wife knew it was poisoned, and to drink from it would mean certain death. So she refused, but her husband decided to drink. In only hours, he succumbed, but his wife, laying down to accept what could have been her destiny, was saved by Indians who were tracking their footprints in the dirt. She was helped, and survived. 

Your husband needs hope of holding out, and you could be, with the words God's Spirit reveals to you, that constant encouragement he needs. The message here, sister, is not to give up---not to ever give up! 

Edited by Coliseum
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3 hours ago, Coliseum said:

I am so very sorry to read the dilemma you are facing. I had Chemo too.

I recall two people, husband and wife, mountain climbing. They became lost and six days had passed, and they became almost delirious without water or food. They stumbled across a water hole, but the wife knew it was poisoned, and to drink from it would mean certain death. So she refused, but her husband decided to drink. In only hours, he succumbed, but his wife, laying down to accept what could have been her destiny, was saved by Indians who were tracking their footprints in the dirt. She was helped, and survived. 

Your husband needs hope of holding out, and you could be, with the words God's Spirit reveals to you, that constant encouragement he needs. The message here, sister, is not to give up---not to ever give up! 

Thank you! I do encourage him constantly and I know that being his wife I am going to hear his emotions more than anyone else, it just hurts to hear him say those things. I know that it is nothing to do with me but when you are sick constantly 2 full weeks out of a month and feeling only ok the other 2 I see how he must feel. I just honestly don't know if he will give up on it or not and take the chance. I don't know what I will do if he does, how we would tell our kids all of that goes through my mind. I am praying for words of wisdom to speak to him. Thank you for the story.

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19 minutes ago, worriedwife69 said:

Thank you! I do encourage him constantly and I know that being his wife I am going to hear his emotions more than anyone else, it just hurts to hear him say those things. I know that it is nothing to do with me but when you are sick constantly 2 full weeks out of a month and feeling only ok the other 2 I see how he must feel. I just honestly don't know if he will give up on it or not and take the chance. I don't know what I will do if he does, how we would tell our kids all of that goes through my mind. I am praying for words of wisdom to speak to him. Thank you for the story.

Dear sister, please read the following story:

Matthew 8:5-13 (NIV)
5  When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for help.
6  "Lord," he said, "my servant lies at home paralyzed and in terrible suffering."
7  Jesus said to him, "I will go and heal him."
8  The centurion replied, "Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed.
9  For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it."
10  When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him, "I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith.
11  I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven.
12  But the subjects of the kingdom will be thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
13  Then Jesus said to the centurion, "Go! It will be done just as you believed it would." And his servant was healed at that very hour.


Here is a soldier who did not believe in Christ. He was a soldier who only understood two things: power and authority. He had heard Jesus was coming to town. So, he humbled himself and thought, "I am a soldier who has both power and authority. I shall put myself under His."  Why would he do that? Because he believed Jesus, just as Peter believed Jesus on the water, just as Jesus told Peter to believe:

Mark 11:22-24 (NIV)
22  "Have faith in God," Jesus answered.
23  "I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him.
24  Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

When I had Chemo, it was hard, and at first I cried. I believed---I believed with my mind, but not my heart. Jesus really means what he says. Believe him.

Praying for you---and your husband. Begin to write into eternity what you believe, not what you wonder about.

 

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Thank you I really appreciate the encouragement and the stories. I think what I am struggling with the most right now is him saying he is going to stop chemo, I mean I don't know if I'm being selfish by saying that would be a stupid decision or not. I mean he has a very good prognosis, even with his being stage 3 colon cancer it can be cured, I know that that is not always the case but I just feel he is giving up and I honestly don't know how to deal with that. I keep praying for wisdom, strength and I just feel lost with this

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1 minute ago, worriedwife69 said:

I keep praying for wisdom, strength and I just feel lost with this

We are praying with you. Don't give up. We are lost without the Lord

Luke 18:1-6 (NIV)
1  Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.
2  He said: "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men.
3  And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.'
4  "For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men,
5  yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!'"
6  And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says."

Jesus really means what he says. We must believe him. 

 

 

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11 minutes ago, worriedwife69 said:

I think what I am struggling with the most right now is him saying he is going to stop chemo, I mean I don't know if I'm being selfish by saying that would be a stupid decision or not. I mean he has a very good prognosis,

There is nothing at all wrong with you expressing your thoughts to your husband. It's okay to to tell him you think it's not wise to stop treatments when he has such a good prognosis.

Give yourself some margin for being human, and give your husband the same margin. You're both in a difficult situation right now, and both of you are being bombarded by a large spectrum of emotions. Be encouraged, knowing that what you're feeling is normal in your circumstances.

Feed on the Word of God, and revisit some the posts in this thread. There's lots of encouragement for you here. And like @Coliseum said, keeping praying and don't give up praying- asking, seeking, and knocking.

We are still praying for you and your husband.

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Thank you, I keep praying reading God's word but I think I'm letting all this fear get in the way even though I truly do trust God with all of this. This fear that he will stop chemo has really been something I just don't know what to think and I keep praying and praying and reading God's word for comfort. I know this is in God's hands. It does help to go back and read all of the comments on here. 

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When people are in pain and it feels never ending they often say things they don't really mean ( even if in that moment of time they feel that they do mean it ) Think how many women in the throes of labour say " never again " and a LOT worse yet go on to have more  children PAIN HURTS ..yes that sound obvious but when you are going through it you just want it to stop any way you can think of it stopping so please don't get discouraged keep encouraging him to know that " This too will pass " Try making plans for what you will do when this is in the past and not the present and the future and hold onto your dreams as well as each other and most importantly Christ We will keep praying with and for you both :th_praying:

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