johnthebaptist Posted November 1, 2019 Group: Non-Conformist Theology Followers: 6 Topic Count: 118 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 4,361 Content Per Day: 2.31 Reputation: 2,109 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/25/2019 Status: Offline Birthday: 02/03/1953 Share Posted November 1, 2019 14 hours ago, Melinda12 said: I am going to stop attending church. I cannot stand any more of the people. The group that runs everything is unbearable. Squabbling with each other, being self important, so petty. It puts me off my joy of worship. They even resent that i am a quiet one who will not join in their nonsense. I used to be involved in everything but withdrew some time ago as i got exhausted of being put upon. Now i find their personalities tiresome so i say little and feel unwelcome and increasingly an outsider because i won't play their game. I feel resting at home on Sundays is far better. I am happiest reading my Bible, lots of Christian books, praying and being alone and peaceful. I have good real Christian friends and we get together quietly for coffee and to pray and talk in my home. I love that. But what of fellowship and singing hymns? Of mutual support? It's just the few have spoilt that for everyone and i cannot cope with such disruption to my peace of mind any more. So i may attend occasionally now. I will miss it as it was my routine i valued so much. I am so sad about it all. Has anyone else been driven from their church? Yes, churches can be unpleasant. I would suggest a couple of things: You could stick around and set an example for the others. That might even include confronting some of the church's leading citizens regarding the things they do that bother you. Or you could find another church. I don't think staying home on Sundays is the answer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeauJangles Posted November 1, 2019 Group: Royal Member Followers: 44 Topic Count: 229 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 10,900 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 12,145 Days Won: 68 Joined: 02/13/2014 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/14/1954 Share Posted November 1, 2019 1 hour ago, Melinda12 said: I appreciate your thoughts but, in fact i feel this vicar, this man, is not a proper believer. I feel he is in it for a career and platform to be important and to show off. Have authority. I do not get any sense of passion for the Word of God. An emptiness instead. Does this make any sense? These are not thoughts i can voice. Just my own inner feeling. It goes for others in positions of authority in this church, older retired folk who revel in the self importance of it all. I cannot bear it. All glory should go to God never persons. These holier than thou people put mere mortals off with their lofty attitudes. You cannot ever speak to them as they are all very busy busy. Yes sister, it makes perfect sense to me. There are charlatans running rampant in today's churches, and it's an extremely sad situation. I feel you have every right to take some much needed time-out to recover from what I'd term as, "Caustic Christianity". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 1, 2019 Share Posted November 1, 2019 Thankyou. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruth Also Posted November 2, 2019 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 65 Content Per Day: 0.04 Reputation: 57 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/13/2019 Status: Offline Share Posted November 2, 2019 I feel for you, Melinda. Many congregations today are like fast food eateries, a source of inadequate substitutions for what should be there as we meet together to encourage each other not to be hardened by sin's deceitfulness, to feed on His Word together. Frankly, online forums like this often do a better job than the local building assembly. The structure is run like a business, too. It's a set up for failure, although I'm always glad when something good happens there. I heard the gospel message there, for instance. Work with the ones that are working, try to get the ones working that aren't, don't get embittered from unmet expectations (they don't all work), and remember that the congregation God seeks is us collectively and not the building. Thoughts that come to mind as suggestions to consider include: Is there another congregation already established where you can both give and get? Are you strong enough in your faith to help a congregation that has large needs even if it doesn't fill your need and would they allow you to work with them? Is it time to consider opening your home or finding a local spot to encourage a non-church type setting for people to study the Scriptures? God is certainly able to lead if any leadership needed to be established. I hope things go well for you! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StatHaldol Posted November 2, 2019 Group: Members Followers: 2 Topic Count: 0 Topics Per Day: 0 Content Count: 10 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 7 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/02/2019 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/22/1956 Share Posted November 2, 2019 On 11/1/2019 at 2:53 AM, Melinda12 said: I am going to stop attending church. I cannot stand any more of the people. The group that runs everything is unbearable. Squabbling with each other, being self important, so petty. It puts me off my joy of worship. They even resent that i am a quiet one who will not join in their nonsense. I used to be involved in everything but withdrew some time ago as i got exhausted of being put upon. Now i find their personalities tiresome so i say little and feel unwelcome and increasingly an outsider because i won't play their game. I feel resting at home on Sundays is far better. I am happiest reading my Bible, lots of Christian books, praying and being alone and peaceful. I have good real Christian friends and we get together quietly for coffee and to pray and talk in my home. I love that. But what of fellowship and singing hymns? Of mutual support? It's just the few have spoilt that for everyone and i cannot cope with such disruption to my peace of mind any more. So i may attend occasionally now. I will miss it as it was my routine i valued so much. I am so sad about it all. Has anyone else been driven from their church? Thank you Melinda12 for posting this. I have stayed away from church for many of the same reasons you stated. I started wondering if the problem is within me. I just never felt like I “fit” if that makes sense. I know that it is important for God’s people to gather (scriptural). I have been seeking another church where I believe God can use me to make a difference. Please let us know how you’re doing. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sower Posted November 2, 2019 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 14 Topic Count: 32 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 5,247 Content Per Day: 0.97 Reputation: 5,852 Days Won: 1 Joined: 07/09/2009 Status: Offline Share Posted November 2, 2019 On 11/1/2019 at 11:47 AM, Melinda12 said: A small point, vicar is part of the problem. I cannot stand him. I believe he is all showmanship with little substance. Start praying for him, fervently. And see what happens. To you! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 18 hours ago, Sower said: Start praying for him, fervently. And see what happens. To you! That is a good idea! I shall do it. Also for each person who thoroughly annoys me. I will report back in a while. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 I decided to overcome the negativity. I prayed. The feeling came to me to be positive. Then i went today, felt better and i will carry on going. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sower Posted November 3, 2019 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 14 Topic Count: 32 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 5,247 Content Per Day: 0.97 Reputation: 5,852 Days Won: 1 Joined: 07/09/2009 Status: Offline Share Posted November 3, 2019 31 minutes ago, Melinda12 said: That is a good idea! I shall do it. Also for each person who thoroughly annoys me. I will report back in a while. Thank you. Great, Melinda. It has always worked for me, praying for my (perceived) enemies. This way, God can change my view towards them. I 'see' them differently They probably have issues/battles I know nothing about. Then God sends them to me. (woahh): God is light! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustPassingThru Posted November 3, 2019 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 8 Topic Count: 14 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,979 Content Per Day: 0.98 Reputation: 2,112 Days Won: 1 Joined: 10/23/2018 Status: Offline Share Posted November 3, 2019 Dear sister, to answer your question, yes my wife and I have been asked to leave and/or ignored and insulted from practically every church we have attended here, ...just for asking/saying, "The Word of God says this..." So since Thursday you have gone from "no more" to "...went back" today and said you are "feeling" good and will continue to attend... May I please point out, in the Love of Christ and as your brother in Christ, ...church isn't about "feelings," Church is an assembling of the Saints to meet with our God, our Lord and Savior, in, by and through the supernatural "power" of the Holy Spirit living and active inside of us, ...more than "feelings" and I'm "not" talking about the "circus" atmosphere that is being passed of today as the Holy Spirit, ...but rather,...did you experience the "presence" of God, ...were you "fed" from the Word of God, ...did the Holy Spirit inside of you "testify" with your spirit that what you were "hearing" was Him "speaking" through the man giving the sermon/teaching, ...was that still small voice saying inside of you to your spirit, "Yes, Yes, this is true, ...this is what I have heard Jesus say," ...did the spiritual principle you hear inspire your spirit to ask the Holy Spirit to "plant" it in the good soil of your heart, ...to assimilate it and appropriate into your walk with your Lord? Please consider, ...maybe your initial reaction and discernment to the "problems" you observed were from Father and He is urging you to another church, ...if your answer was no to what I asked above, then in His Love for you He wants better for you, ...He wants to meet with you more than you want to meet with Him to comfort you, to encourage you, to teach you, to guide you in this walk with Him, ...so please pray, ask Him if it's true and then ask Him to lead you to the Church He has prepared for you, ...you have a special gift(s) that they need, ...it's like they are waiting for you. I know this from personal experience in my own life back in the States, Father revealed to me errors in doctrine in the church I was attending, ...so I asked Him to place me in the church He had for me, He did, when I walked through the door the first time it was like they had been waiting for me, it was like I was already part of the family and I had never met any of the brothers and sisters in Christ before! Lord bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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