Want to believe

[Guest crystalbean19]

I want to be back again in my religion. I was raised believing in christianity, but now, that I'm 19, it's hard to put the worldy facts behind and give that "blind faith"

that I once had when I was younger. Plus I was never fully devoted. I'd be one person at church and one person to the world. I have gotten to the point where I feel like there is no god, and if there was why would he hear me, I hear that God's a gentleman and if you turn your back on him to many times he turns and leaves you. It's been about 9 months since I stop believing and my ideas I have expressed to others same to influence them. Is it too late for me? Am I lost forever? There have been two bad incidents that have taken place since I have lost my faith. During both, I start to pray, but then I stop and ask myself, "Why pray? No one is there to listen, and if god is there it's too late for me?" Is that a sign?? Have I been abandoned for abandoning god?

[ayin jade]

Welcome Chrystal.

If you were beyond hope of redemption, I do not believe that you would be worried about it as you are now. The Lord longs for us to return to Him. He longs for you now, to pray to Him, to repent and turn from your sins.

Do you know who Jesus is? Have you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior? This is what matters here. Living for the Lord each day.

Spend some time talking to the Lord in prayer. Reach out to Him. Talk to Him. He never left. He waits for you. He will hear your prayers.

[Pipit]

Hey Crystal,

Thank you for sharing your struggle, and also expresssing your desires and your doubts and your questions. The fact that you are here sharing this is awesome. It shows that you are searching, and Jesus told us that if we seek we will find. It is a difficult place when you are seriously questioning your faith and are finding it difficult to believe God hears you. It is difficult to see events happen that really shouldn't and which make you wonder if God is in control, or if He is real. You don't know what to pray, and when you do try to pray, you don't know if there is anyone to hear you. There are many here who know the place you are in because we have been in similar places. My prayer is that we can help you.

You have asked the question "Have I been abandoned for abandoning God?"

I would say 'No' to that a thousand times over. If you have been abandoned by Him, then I doubt my heart would ache for you, or that God would send people here to pray for you and encourage you. Yet more then that, we know we have a God who loves us so much that He sent His Son to die on a cross for us (John 3:16), that He loves us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3-4), and who desires that none should parish but that we all come to repentence (2nd Peter 3:9). He will not abandon you, but like a Father waiting for a child to come back home He will wait for you, longing for you to turn around and come back to Him (and He will send people to you to help you turn around and to come home running).

I do not know what it is that you went through that left you so hurt, and I understand that you may wish to keep those things private. Yet I want to encourage you to know that in your hurt it is alright to bring those things, your angerness, your bitterness, your questions and your feelings to God. It's alright to do that. It's alright to rage and shout and pour your hurt and anguish out to God--even your wrong feelings and thoughts. David did it many times as he poured himself out in his psalms. Let Him know you feel abandoned, that you are in doubt, that you hurt, and that you have no clue where to turn.

I also encourage you to seek fellowship. As said, there are many here who know the place you are in. My hope is that you will be able to find someone whom you can open your heart to and share your experiences with, and who can understand and relate where you are, and encourage and guide you as you seek restoration.

And I also pray for you...

[Kabowd]

During both, I start to pray, but then I stop and ask myself, "Why pray? No one is there to listen, and if god is there it's too late for me?" Is that a sign?? Have I been abandoned for abandoning god?

"The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you." ~ Psalm 9:9-10

"You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted; you enourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more." ~ Psalm 10:17-18

"I call on you, O God, for you will answer me; give ear to me and hear my prayer. Show the wonder of your great love, you who save by your right hand those who take refuge in you from their foes. Keep me as the apple of your eye, hide me in the shadow of your wings." ~ Psalm 17:6-8

"The Lord your God is with you, He is might to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing." ~ Zephaniah 3:17

Did you notice something in common with those verses? They remind us that He *hears* us when we cry out to Him. Did you know that in Psalm 56, it even teaches us that He saves our tears when we cry? That's how great His love is for you. Does He hate sin? Yes. Do we face consequences when we stray? Yes. But whoever told you that He is a "gentlemen" and basically just leaves us alone when we disobey misrepresented Who He really is. Read the book of Hosea, read the book of Jonah, read the stories about David the King. When we try to abandon God, He doesn't just "turn us loose"...He pursues us. We face consequences and He devises things in our life so that they will drive us back to Him. I believe He is pursuing you even now or you wouldn't even have a desire to be close to Him again.

Keep searching and seeking. Keep praying and don't stop. Get into the Bible and discover Who He really is for yourself. Start out with the Psalms if you're new to reading the Bible and just go from there. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

[yomotalking]

Hey Crystal,

Thank you for sharing your struggle, and also expresssing your desires and your doubts and your questions. The fact that you are here sharing this is awesome. It shows that you are searching, and Jesus told us that if we seek we will find.  It is a difficult place when you are seriously questioning  your faith and are finding it difficult to believe God hears you. It is difficult to see events happen that really shouldn't and which make you wonder if God is in control, or if He is real. You don't know what to pray, and when you do try to pray, you don't know if there is anyone to hear you. There are many here who know the place you are in because we have been in similar places. My prayer is that we can help you.

You have asked the question "Have I been abandoned for abandoning God?"

I would say 'No' to that a thousand times over. If you have been abandoned by Him, then I doubt my heart would ache for you, or that God would send people here to pray for you and encourage you. Yet more then that, we know we have a God who loves us so much that He sent His Son to die on a cross for us (John 3:16), that He loves us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3-4), and who desires that none should parish but that we all come to repentence (2nd Peter 3:9). He will not abandon you, but like a Father waiting for a child to come back home He will wait for you, longing for you to turn around and come back to Him (and He will send people to you to help you turn around and to come home running).

I do not know what it is that you went through that left you so hurt, and I understand that you may wish to keep those things private. Yet I want to encourage you to know that in your hurt it is alright to bring those things, your angerness, your bitterness, your questions and your feelings to God. It's alright to do that. It's alright to rage and shout and pour your hurt and anguish out to God--even your wrong feelings and thoughts. David did it many times as he poured himself out in his psalms. Let Him know you feel abandoned, that you are in doubt, that you hurt, and that you have no clue where to turn.

I also encourage you to seek fellowship. As said, there are many here who know the place you are in. My hope is that you will be able to find someone whom you can open your heart to and share your experiences with, and who can understand and relate where you are, and encourage and guide you as you seek restoration.

And I also pray for you...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

But what does it mean, when the Bible talks about leaving us if we contiue in sin?

I am, so far.....I feel like I can't care about God....oh,I want to...but somehow...I can't........

Does that mean I have gone too far?

Or that God has abandoned me?

[Kabowd]

But what does it mean, when the Bible talks about leaving us if we contiue in sin?

Can you show me what verse/verses you're referring to?

I am, so far.....I feel like I can't care about God....oh,I want to...but somehow...I can't........

Does that mean I have gone too far?

Or that God has abandoned me?

Our feelings do not define who we are. Just because we don't *feel* like God is with us doesn't mean He's not there.

[Guest ajithkumar]

Beloved in Christ

You need a personal touch of our Saviour - for him to become your personal Saviour.

For which he says if you seek him fervently and with your whole heart you shall find him.

To acquire the knowledge of this perishable itself you need to put in you whole effort and acquire a little how much more you should seek God and His Kingdom - the imperishable.

Faith is the substance of things that are not seen and the things that are hoped for . Hebrews 11:1.

May God bless you

[Leonard]

I am so glad you do not have 'blind faith,' for blind faith is NOT FAITH. It is presumption.

The true faith is INFORMED. It has great evidences to back it up. If you have never looked at the evidences, why should you believe? That's a fool's leap!

If it's really important to you, then I challenge you to look at the EVIDENCES, dear; and then make up your mind. If it's not important enough to you to do the investigating, then fare thee well, wherever you fare.

[kodischild]

There was a song I heard once. The chorus said, "Lord I do believe, but help my unbelief, I pray."

Does it feel like that? You do but you don't believe? You want to believe but you can't? That doesn't mean you are lost, it means you are entering a new place in your faith.

The move from having your parents' belief to having your own is usually difficult. Keep searching. Keep praying even when it FEELS like the prayers aren't getting past the ceiling. (because feeling isn't fact, He hears.) Keep asking Christians for help. You'll pull through.

[Guest RJD Servant]

Hi Chrystal

Our God in the word says that He will NEVER Leave US nor forsake us! What does never mean?

So he is there waiting for You to take the step and turn around and see Him once again and move in the direction of Jesus Christ and the cross to take your Sins there and leave them at the bottom of the Cross covered under the Blood of Jesus. The He will give your the Power to Raise yourself up and walk in the light of His Gospel according to His Will and wants and desires for your Life.

Change will happen if your only take the full step and turn around. We forsake God we fall by the way side and become strangers to Him.

He NEVER Leaves US nor FORSAKES US!

Our Sins are taken and placed in the sea of forgetfulness or cast as far as the east is from the west. He remmembers them no more. Leave all your sins at the Cross and move on in God.

Forgive yourself!

You CHOOSE to move on in God and he will always be there. You make the CHOICE to change and become closer to the things of God and all that he desire for you.

The Spirit of this World will keep us sinking under the infuance of the World and friends around us as Satan does not want You to Believe there is a God and turn and follow him. Satan is out for souls for his kingdom and he will stop at nothing to turn you against God and all that you know about him.

Cut the ties to your worldly friends untill you can be a testemony to them in the Light of God. Choose to remove anything that will turn you away from the things of God and his truth becoming stronger in your life.

Think this way Eternity.

What is going to be in my eternity by the choice that I make this day?

What is going to go to heaven with me when I die?

This world and all that is in it will not be in heaven nothing that we attach ourselves to will be going with us.

What ever is our loves down here will not go to the grave when our life is over.

Choose what is Heavenly and Godly and Right in the sight of God and that your Soul is more important to God as he keeps drawing you unto himself every day that you desire to live for Him.

I will be praying for you Chrystal that you will make the right choices and God will fill your life with His Presence.

RJD Servant