menegroth Posted March 16, 2006 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 31 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 65 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/11/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted March 16, 2006 I think all men have this struggle at one point or another, some it may be just a split second and it's done others it continues, i don't think there is anything wrong with noticing if someone is attractive, of course your going to notice, but the important thing to keep straight is not to fantasize about anything you see an attractive girl, acknowledge it and then pass by i almost look at it on the same lines as the " be angry and sin not" but more along the lines of " aknowledge and sin not" for myself i have found that keeping direct eye contact with someone durign a conversation helps that and really focus on that it helps a ton. as for others in the room i try to set myself in such a way that i cannot see them, for example if a girl sits in front of you that is attractive sit in front of her, or position yourself in such a way that they will not be in your direct line of sight, so that you would have to go out of your way to look at them. if i am walking out in public i tend to focus on various other things either walk along ad keep my eyes on tops of trees, looking at the sky ground or reading the license plates on cars to my right as a girl walks past me on my left. i have found these help a bundle for myself hopefulyl theyu will help you as well. josh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
O'Dannyboy Posted March 16, 2006 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 156 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 3,454 Content Per Day: 0.48 Reputation: 4 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/22/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/02/1969 Share Posted March 16, 2006 I too struggle with this. I have given up smoking, drinking, caffine and even stopped biting my nails but I have not managed to overcome this. I understand that is in my nature to sin so I know I can never be without sin until God makes it so. The only thing I can think to do is to ask for his forgiveness and pray that he will soon lead me to my future wife. I am hopeful that the woman I marry will fully satisfy my desires that I may not look at other women that way. But, I am fearful that I will not find a woman to marry until I can overcome my own lust. I cannot say. All I can do is pray, repent and try to sin as little as possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marnie Posted March 31, 2006 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 811 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 7,338 Content Per Day: 1.08 Reputation: 76 Days Won: 2 Joined: 10/06/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted March 31, 2006 Or, you could just try the old cold shower. How is it men are capable of thinking of absolutely nothing sometimes (or so they claim over dinner), yet struggle with this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cadillacactor Posted April 1, 2006 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 10 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/24/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted April 1, 2006 Or, you could just try the old cold shower. How is it men are capable of thinking of absolutely nothing sometimes (or so they claim over dinner), yet struggle with this? First off, I'm a little offended by this statement. However, I'll clarify it by saying that yes, there are times that men are incapable of some sort of conscious, purposeful thought. However, these thoughts merely creep in without being wanted or purposeful. It's a rather stereotypical, blanket statement to make as you did, Marnie, and I daresay you aren't a male offering the kind of help that Dan was looking for. Otherwise, you'd realize how much of a constant struggle this is for many men trying to live for Christ. Thank you for being a supportive sister. We all appreciate it, and we would love to help you just as much as you have helped Dan here when you have a problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marnie Posted April 1, 2006 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 811 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 7,338 Content Per Day: 1.08 Reputation: 76 Days Won: 2 Joined: 10/06/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted April 1, 2006 Wow! A thousand apologies...I had no idea it was such a problem among the male species. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cadillacactor Posted April 1, 2006 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 10 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/24/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted April 1, 2006 Wow! A thousand apologies...I had no idea it was such a problem among the male species. Apology accepted. This problem of impure thoughts is a plague in the mind of men the world over. When we become Christians, it doesn't mean that temptation is removed from our lives, however. As Christians, we not only have a desire to live a pure and holy life, we also now have an overriding guilt from all of these thoughts that cloud our minds (especially at the most inopportune of moments). Additionally, because of this shame and guilt, many guys will to any extent to cover it and these thoughts up, which can lead to deceitful ways and lying. It just builds and builds and goes on and on! We can pray and pray that God will remove these, but Satan attacks even harder once we try to do something about it. I've been counseling some of the guys in my youth group about it. Becuase this problem truly affects EVERY aspect of a man's thought life, it flows into other areas of life and can lead to problems such as masturbation, pre-marital sexual activity, insecure and failing relationships with the opposite sex, and a myriad of other problems. And it isn't even under our control...again, these thoughts creep in of their own volition (or at the devil's bidding) and for a man to overcome them can only happen with the power of God. This requires a strong faith and commitment, and the belief that God truly can do anything, because making God smaller than He is won't accomplish a thing. Now, not only do I need to help guide these high-school & junior high-school guys to understand how huge God truly is (which is daunting in and of itself), they have to truly believe it and want to overcome this issue. And in a single post that's this short, I can't truly tell you the extent of it. Suffice it to say, that until you've experienced the overpowering hold of these thoughts, it's difficult to comprehend. I'm sorry for coming down hard on you, it's just a sensitive subject right now as I try to lead my youth as well as continue the process of being and becoming pure myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest br.biff Posted April 1, 2006 Share Posted April 1, 2006 Remember, Jesus came so that all would be saved but we know that not all will, God is not going to say " well son you didn't get them all". No He rewards the effort not the result. Just keep praying and try not to let these thoughts control you and you will begin to see that they get easier to put away. May not happen overnight but He will reward your effort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonwalkr Posted April 1, 2006 Group: Members Followers: 1 Topic Count: 3 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 17 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 2 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/08/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/25/1974 Share Posted April 1, 2006 What the youth pastor (cadillac) says is true, it is a problem with men. I think it was last November when I made a commitment to the Lord to keep my eyes clean. I've stumbed a handful of times since then and I am so much happier in general to have made that choice. I can say that it is a choice for every action that I do. People can come up with so many excuses to say they can't conquer it or that they can't help it, but they can help it if they choose rightly with the Lord's help. It sure as heck isn't easy as, yes, I do look at women in public but my thought stops right there and I move on. One has to train their mind to think of good things since we are predisposed to sin. I do want to share one thing, I have never gone as far as to masturbate. I am thankful I have never fallen into that trap. For one, my imagination can't replace one thing for another in that respect. I can also be thankful that I'm still a virgin by the skin of my teeth. Someone has told me that once you go there it's hard to quench that desire. I would liken it to a drug addiction. But as with anything addictive, it can be stopped if the person is willing to take steps for change. The Lord is able to deliver us from these things as the others have said. Like the Word says, we must choose who we will serve each day, every moment, dying to our own desires and seeking His ways. I do pray that the Lord holds my thoughts captive. I agree with the statement about not letting that thought move on into sin. Well, I think I mght have repeated some things the others have said, but I know we can all relate to this thing since we are in this together. Just remember that the Lord is in control and can work in us only if we let Him do so.. that means surrender. Our flesh can become so overbearing in our lives but we need to fill our lives with the pure things the Lord has for us. The lovely things of this world get twisted by Satan, so that's why we need to rely on His Word and His strength. Philippians 4:6-9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Razberry Posted April 1, 2006 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 5 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 108 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/30/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted April 1, 2006 This problem is not limited to men. It's very real for many, many women also. (yep, I'm a she.) An impure thought entering your mind is one thing. We're all human and satan is going to throw temptations at us. That's his job. However, dwelling on the impure thought, turning it into fantasy, that's deliberate sin. Instead of letting the thought linger, start praying. Better than a cold shower any day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Soulfly Posted April 1, 2006 Share Posted April 1, 2006 heres an idea, why not enjoy these PERFECTLY natural thoughts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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