My co-worker cusses

[Biscuit]

I work with a 30 y/o young lady who has a very foul mouth. She is also very "bossy" and confrontational to others. We work in a hospital pharmacy. I think she "picks fights" with some of the nurses. She is very materialistic and is having marital problems. She's a very unhappy person. There are other things, but I think I have shared enough.

Here is my problem. I am uncomfortable around the profanity. And things like her coming into the pharmacy and saying "That so & so, she is such a b*tch." I am not the director. I think it bothers the director a little, but not to the point that she will say much. I have never been real out-going. What do I say to this young lady to keep her from cussing, without it escalating? Or is this possible? The company has policies regarding sexual harassment and other things, but I have not seen one regarding profanity. I have thought about putting on my headphones and listening to Christian music. You can do that in a hospital pharmacy (but not retail). I did that at another job. Any suggestions?

James

[ladypeartree]

sounds like you have a very good answer with the headphones

If she swears ever tried saying "bless you " in the way you would if she sneezed ?

If the poor woman is going through such a lot and is so obviously unhappy she needs all the blessings she can get

[Leonard]

I hear it in English and Spanish both, most days. I remind the guys: "Man, your mama would wash your mouth out with soap if she heard you!" Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't.

"EEEE! Su madre lavarse su boca, con JABON!!!"

[Guest Collie1]

I believe that using language like that amounts to some type of harassment.

Years ago my late husband had to take a class about harassment, and they did say that swearing can be considered harassment.

I think you should talk to your director about it, if you feel he/she would be discreet in talking to your co-worker.

I wouldn't necessarily go with the headphones; you could alienate yourself from everyone doing that.

I am sure you are already setting a good example by keeping your mouth clean and your actions above reproach. People notice this.

When I first started my present job, the language from my co-workers was terrible. I never said anything until they got to know me better; then I just mentioned how awful I thought taking the LORD's name in vain was. They were really good at not doing that for awhile, the rest of their language has cleaned up considerably.

Hope this is helpful, Colleen

[Eliyahuw]

I work with a 30 y/o young lady who has a very foul mouth. She is also very "bossy" and confrontational to others. We work in a hospital pharmacy. I think she "picks fights" with some of the nurses. She is very materialistic and is having marital problems. She's a very unhappy person. There are other things, but I think I have shared enough.

Here is my problem. I am uncomfortable around the profanity. And things like her coming into the pharmacy and saying "That so & so, she is such a b*tch." I am not the director. I think it bothers the director a little, but not to the point that she will say much. I have never been real out-going. What do I say to this young lady to keep her from cussing, without it escalating? Or is this possible? The company has policies regarding sexual harassment and other things, but I have not seen one regarding profanity.

James

Is she cussing or just using bitch. The word isn't a cuss word. I would just ignore it and go on.

Your probably going to have to just live with it, as there are no constitutional laws (thank God), to prohibit expression of ones self. I would just ignore it or like someone else said wear headphones.

[Kabowd]

Her treatment of others should be more of a concern than her language. The way she speaks is just an expression of what's inside (and you indicated she has significant problems). I would suggest attempting to befriend her, show compassion and becoming and influence. Yes, this requires much more patience and sacrifice than wearing headphones but it's an attempt at actually bringing her hope and resolving issue rather than burying your head in the sand and hoping it just goes away. If building a relationship doesn't work, then I'd approach the boss with concerns about how she treats customers and fellow employees. Again, I think her language is the symptom of the greater problem. If you work in a pharmacy, an analogy of medicine might help. If a customer/patient comes in with sores all over his face...offering him bandaids is going to offer little relief and won't address why he has the sores in the first place. There are topical treatments that can relieve symptoms...but truly helping someone would involve addressing their underlying condition.

[Guest Collie1]

Her treatment of others should be more of a concern than her language. The way she speaks is just an expression of what's inside (and you indicated she has significant problems). I would suggest attempting to befriend her, show compassion and becoming and influence. Yes, this requires much more patience and sacrifice than wearing headphones but it's an attempt at actually bringing her hope and resolving issue rather than burying your head in the sand and hoping it just goes away. If building a relationship doesn't work, then I'd approach the boss with concerns about how she treats customers and fellow employees. Again, I think her language is the symptom of the greater problem. If you work in a pharmacy, an analogy of medicine might help. If a customer/patient comes in with sores all over his face...offering him bandaids is going to offer little relief and won't address why he has the sores in the first place. There are topical treatments that can relieve symptoms...but truly helping someone would involve addressing their underlying condition.

Biscuit, if you are male be very careful with this.

[MeCajunboy]

I work with a 30 y/o young lady who has a very foul mouth. She is also very "bossy" and confrontational to others. We work in a hospital pharmacy. I think she "picks fights" with some of the nurses. She is very materialistic and is having marital problems. She's a very unhappy person. There are other things, but I think I have shared enough.

Here is my problem. I am uncomfortable around the profanity. And things like her coming into the pharmacy and saying "That so & so, she is such a b*tch." I am not the director. I think it bothers the director a little, but not to the point that she will say much. I have never been real out-going. What do I say to this young lady to keep her from cussing, without it escalating? Or is this possible? The company has policies regarding sexual harassment and other things, but I have not seen one regarding profanity. I have thought about putting on my headphones and listening to Christian music. You can do that in a hospital pharmacy (but not retail). I did that at another job. Any suggestions?

James

Hi James,

I would think the "profanity" company policy should be a part of the general "harrassment" policy. Normally, if you are offended by anything, you are obligated to advise management of the issue. It doesn't have to be of a "sexual" nature. You might check on it before you file! I won't be surprised if the language abuse gets worse as her marriage does. Who knows, perhaps it's offending others and they are not as bold or outspoken and merely don't want to rock the boat. I ususally say something like, "Is all the cussing necessary?" and walk away from her noise, and then see where it goes from there.

Best of luck

Cajunboy

[Eliyahuw]

Her treatment of others should be more of a concern than her language. The way she speaks is just an expression of what's inside (and you indicated she has significant problems). I would suggest attempting to befriend her, show compassion and becoming and influence. Yes, this requires much more patience and sacrifice than wearing headphones but it's an attempt at actually bringing her hope and resolving issue rather than burying your head in the sand and hoping it just goes away. If building a relationship doesn't work, then I'd approach the boss with concerns about how she treats customers and fellow employees. Again, I think her language is the symptom of the greater problem. If you work in a pharmacy, an analogy of medicine might help. If a customer/patient comes in with sores all over his face...offering him bandaids is going to offer little relief and won't address why he has the sores in the first place. There are topical treatments that can relieve symptoms...but truly helping someone would involve addressing their underlying condition.

Ehhhhh i wouldn't touch that with her with a 100' pole. Your asking to get a sexual harrassment suit filed against you!!!!!!

I have been a manager in a company where i had to deal with this as well as other things. My supervisor lost his job, as well as got the company sued as well as himself sued for councelling a female employee over language. Leave the councelling up to the Human resources department where they will have other females along with witnesses and video tapes rolling.

[ray]

Have tried compmpliment her when she says something in a positive manner.

For example;

Wow for such a beautiful person you have a lot of profound things to say when your not cussing.

how can a young smart person like yourself use such foul language?

When it comes to professionalism in a meeting or with client everyone should speak with kind and gentle words.

or

ask her for every curse word she uses she needs a nickle jar and see how fast it fills up. or use something like poker chips if money is an issue and if she fills the jar than she has to take you or the office out to lunch or dinner.