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teetering on bitterness


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My name is Michelle, I am new to this site. I am a Christ Follower of many decades. Haven't known any other life. I was divorced years ago, and remarried, to a Christian, for 6 years. I have 2 young'ens. I am feeling so desperate today. I know I am most likely being selfish, but here is my earlier prayer written out:

Dearest Lord and Savior,

:( I don't get it! I feel like I have devoted myself to you, doing daily devotions, praying daily, worshipping you corporately several times a week, yet I feel like i'm Job. My husband has been given so much, yet he treats those blessings like trash. He had nothing 10 years ago, but lived for you, G-d. Four years later you blessed him with a doting wife, great doctors who care for his illness, a mentor that seeks him out, a potentially great full time job, and he just spits in your face and mine by dabbling in drugs, walking away from you, and treating me poorly.

The world is all about him, what he wants, what can he get to satisfy himself. Yet I strive to serve you daily, G-d! Blessings are not my motivation for doing unto you Lord. But i do struggle with the fact that my heart is broken time after time after time. :emot-crying: It's so frustrating! I almost can't stand looking at him dripping with blessings that he just takes for granted. He won't do anything that doesn't serve him and want he wants.

How can I live like this and NOT become bitter??? I know you are a great G-d, and won't punish me for telling you these things. I resolve to continue in faith, but can i get a break? Please? AMEN

Thank you, Worthy Board Members for letting me share this with you. I needed to "say" it outloud. I ask for your prayers over this mess.

Michelle

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Welcome. I moved this from Worthy Welcome to Looking for Advise

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Welcome. I moved this from Worthy Welcome to Looking for Advise

Ok. I was not sure the exact location it fit under since it was my first post.

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praying for you and for your hubby as well.

love your sister in Christ,

Rebekah David

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Thank you so very much, Rebekah. That means so much to me to know another person is praying for my situation.

Michelle

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Hi Michelle. First of all, welcome to Worthy. I hope you find lots of friends here.

You are in such a tough spot and one that so many find themselves. I guess the main thing to remember is that you are not responsible for your husbands actions. You say he is a Christian, but it doesn't seem as if he is walking as a Christian. He doesn't seem to be taking his God ordained place in life seriously - godly leadership in the family, for instance. Although you can't force him to see his errors, you can pray for him. Pray that his eyes will be opened and that he will become the man that God knows he can be. Do you both go to church? I hope so, and I hope that it is a Christ centered, Bible believing church. If he could get involved in a men's Bible study that would be good.

But don't let his actions come between you and God. Your actions and your words and your relationship with Jesus can influence him greatly. It isn't easy, but pray for guidance.

<>< ><>

Nathele

Dear Lord,

Please help this man to open his eyes to what blessings You have given him. Show him how to be the man you want him to be and to be the leader of his household. Show him what he needs to change and what he needs to build on to become who you want him to be.

In Christ's name I pray

Amen

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Thank you, Nathele. That was so encouraging, I can't thank you enough.

We go to a fantastic Bible centered church where we are challanged weekly.

He has a men's bible study, and we have a couple's bible study during the week.

It is like he is 2 different persons in one. He knows the bible intimately, yet he makes such nonChristian decisions. You are right, I can not let his actions come between me and God.

thank you so very much,

Michelle

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Praise the Lord.......Welcome to Worhty

Hang in there sister, it is always darkest before the dawn.

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Praying for you also. Hold on. God is in control. :blink::emot-highfive:

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Pray for guidence, pray to God for your husband to receive right desires.

God I pray for HangingByaFaith's husband, infuse in him your love and your desires. Guide him in living your word.

God Bless you and welcome to Worthy. :emot-highfive:

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