roro

greetings in the lord all, my wife and i have been praying together nightly, hard fervent prayer. i have taken up the mantel of the spiritual leader of the house that i somehow let slip away. funny how these things happen without us knowing it. i am smiling again. the problems are not fixed but they are on their way in the right direction. once again thank you to all who have been praying. i have experienced a healing touch through your prayers and notes of compassion. Carlos, you are in my prayers brother. i am reading dobsons "when love must be tough" and since my wife asked me to read it months ago and i didn't, "five languages of love". both have been informative and helpful. i am trying to adopt a christ-like approach to serving my wife, not letting her use me as a doormat, but trying to meet her needs in every i way can. i will check out the other book posted (can't remember who right now but thank you) as well. i will continue to post more later. we are taking a mini vacation later this week to spend some time alone together. ALSO, i have a new job PRAISE THE LORD! I start on jan 3rd, excellent pay, stable company, and something i will enjoy doing. i feel great. roro

thank you to all who have posted. Ayin Jade your words, though painful are true. i listened to a series on focus on the family archives today that helped. it is called "love must be tough", there are 7 audio clips and a book that i will be getting. it tends to focus primarily on when only one part of the relationship want it to work. through contiuous prayer and seeking god's will i believe there will be a restoration. all, please continue to lift my wife and i up in your prayers, i will keep posting (hopefully good news). i grew up in a split home and survived it but i do not want that for my 16mo old daughter. love in christ roro p.s. psalms 37:5-10? helped too

yes, we are both christians. i am a promise keeper and have tried to understand or intelectualize why this is happening. i am not coming up with anything. she told me she loves me, she doesn't love him BUT, she wants to be with him because of how he makes her feel. they have not had sex but she admitted to kissing him and i think she went to dinner with him friday night when she told me she was working late. i live on the south side of atlanta and do not feel comfortable talking to my pastor about this because he is my friend of 13 years. i don't feel comfortable talking to my promise keeper group or my prayer partner. i am so embarrassed and emotionally crushed. serious depression is setting in, i am completely emotionally exhausted. i think i can relate to women suffering post partum. i have cried buckets. continue praying.

hi all, i have never posted to this site before but i needed some input from some christian men who are not close to me. I tried yahoo but it was a frustrating joke i don't care to ever experience again. i am a godly man, married for 5 years. my wife and i are having a hard time right now because she is the sole breadwinner since september. the umemployment helps but the nest egg is dwindeling. my wife told me that she didn't think i was taking care of her by having a job and being a godly husband and she asked me to move out. since we had already planned to stay the weekend at my parents house, I had all my stuff and she just left me there. this was thursday afternoon. I was physically ill, i vomited till i dry heaved, i cried till my eyes swelled shut. that night she called me and told me about another man she was "talking" to. she told me how he treated her and told her she was pretty. when i remarked that i tell her how beautiful she is all the time, she said, "you have to say that, your my husband". several hours later she asked me to come home and i did so. when i got home we talked more in depth about the other man and i cried like i have never cried before. she asked me to please stop crying, that she was sorry and would not talk to him any more. i felt like we made significant progress and fell asleep in eachothers arms. i have been trying to do everything right. i burned her some love songs on a cd and put it in her car, i bought her roses, and massaged her feet when she came home from work. tonight when she came home from work she said she wanted to take a bubble bath, i poured the water, she lit some candles, and i left the room. later i came to check on her and she quickly turned off the phone. curious, i left and then waited outside the door. i wish to god that i hadn't. she dialed a number and minutes later was having phone sex with some guy! why??? what did i do to deserve this??? I am numb. after she finished we put up the christmas tree like nothing was different. the whole time i wanted to cry. i found it hard to make eye contact with her but tried to act as normal as possible. when she went to bed i went to my office and cried into a pillow for an hour. what do i do? how do i trust this woman? i am heart broken and demoralized, i don't know what to do. i cant talk to my pk friends, i would be just too emotional. i need guidance on how to proceed. if there are pastors monitoring, help me. i need serious, informative replies only, i appreciate the heartfelt sympathy and covet your prayers (offline). god grant me peace, strength and wisdom. my heart can't take much more.