JNMRR

3 hours ago, Warrior of Jesus said:

I do not know anything about Islam. So I am not going to comment anything on it. I am going to show you our Lord's answers to your question.

36. "A man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’

37.“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

38. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. - Matthew 10: 36-38.

If you get married to this Muslim man and truly follow Christianity, your house will turn against you. Christ himself told this. If you have an alternate way, why do you want to take risk and try to compromise your faith?

Let Jesus and his words be your no.1 priority. Leave your life and your future in God's hands. Following Christ is not a walk in the bed of roses. The path to Christ is narrow one and is filled with thorns and sharp stones. If you wish to follow him, you have to go through it no matter what. There is no other way to reach Christ.

 Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” - Matthew 19:21.

In other words, you have to leave everything that gives you comfort to follow God. Being with the man you love is a comfort. But you must leave everything that stays between you and God. All these comforts are nothing but distractions. This man is your weakness. If he is your strength, you would not ask this question in the first place. Jesus is our only strength.

No love is greater than Jesus' love. Your love for him, his love for you can never be compared with God's love. God gave his only son for our salvation. Can't you give up your love for such a loving father? Can you give your life for your boyfriend? Can he give his life for you? Even if you both can, can you both save yourself from being doomed to hell? Jesus asks you to give your worldly pleasures and love for being with him in heaven ultimately.

If you have seen my post, i have asked a similar question. I was in similar dilemma. I love a Hindu guy. He is a great person. I love his character. He would be broken, if I leave him. I could never think of hurting him. I could not imagine not talking to him. He was the first person I talked to when I wake up and he was the last person when I go to sleep. He was my world. I was so much in love with him. It was impossible to leave him.

For more than a month, whenever I pray, God asked me to leave him. But I do not want to hurt him. So I fought with God. I prayed to God to make him accept Christ. I also had another thought in my mind. If he becomes christian, we can marry each other. You see, religion was the reason we could not marry each other. I pestered God with my prayers. But every time, God wanted me to leave him. At first I believed God was there to solve all our problems. To change our lives like we wanted. In other words, like a magic wand. It is against the submission and faith. When I realized it, I changed the way, I pray. I prayed to him to give me the heart to accept anything he gives me. God wanted me to leave him. I have searched lots and lots and websites for the answers. I have asked the same question here. Though I received the answers, I hesitated.

It was not only because of love, he was also the reason. We promised each other that we would never leave each other till the death. So I don't want to break the promise. Moreover, he has so many problems in his life right now. He told me that he forgot how to be happy. He was crying. He told me to not add problems to his already problematic life. So I did not want to hurt him. I could not see him broken. Though all the above mentioned verses and the statements seemed right, this guy was also important to me. So I had an internal battle. Should I leave him or not?

Today, I read this thread from the beginning till the end. I was enlightened. Even if I am with him till the end, he could never be happy. He never was. Only God can give him the real happiness. I can only pray for him. He was a distraction to my spiritual growth. I was always worried of him. I could not concentrate on God. If God wanted me to leave him, he has a purpose. So I prayed to God and submitted my life and his life into his hands. I sent him an email explaining why I am leaving him and blocked his number. He would be so much worried now. He would cry. He might even hate me. I would be seen a selfish girl to his eyes. He will not understand me. I might seem crazy and my reasons would seem absurd to him. I can imagine all sort of things. But I do not care. You know what I am going to do? I cannot forget him just because I cut off this relationship. I will think about him every second of my life. As I do not have any contact with him, I am worried what he will be his reactions to my mail.  So I am going to pray for him, for his salvation more now. I have faith in the lord that he would do great things in my life and his life. When I was talking to that guy, I did not pray for him very much. But now I have no other option. So I am going to devote my time praying for him. I will also grow in God.

When I prayed to God about him, I was shown this verse.

15. But the Lord said to Ananias, “Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel.

16. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.”  - Acts 9: 15, 16

God has a greater plan for him. He is chosen instrument of God. So I need not worry about him. God will take care of him because he loves him more than me. God created everyone for a purpose. He has a purpose, for the guy I love, for the guy you love and for you. So Give your life into his hands and do not worry about your man. Pray for him every second. God will take care of him. Pray for his salvation more than being married to him. Your love should not be a worldly one. Your man should see God's love in you. He must not be attracted to you. Instead, he must be attracted to the God dwelling in you.

Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; - 1 Corinthians 6: 19.

Let your thoughts fill with God's words instead of worldly sorrows.

As the guy, I left, is in problems right now, I should be a supportive one to him. I should talk to him about God and show him God's love. I should guide him in God's ways but I did not know why God wanted me to leave him in his crisis. Sometimes you cannot understand God's ways. But do not loose faith and take that huge step.

When Job was tested by Satan, only God knew the reason. Till the end, Job did not know it. He was tested, his life was restored. But the reason was never revealed to him. Job did not question God. Instead he remained faithful to God even when his life turned bitter. So do not question God and doubt him, but be faithful and humble.

Though Abraham, Issac, Jacob were promised that God would give the Canaan to his children, they did not witness it their whole lives. Nevertheless, they never questioned God and remained faithful to him. We should not expect rewards and we must cultivate the virtue of patience. His love and his salvation are the greatest assets for us.

If you can love a human this much, you are capable to love God more than that. When you love Jesus more than anything in this world, then your heart will yearn to leave everything for God. Just like we fall in love with human by daily talking to him, we must talk to God by praying and reading his words and asking the Holy Spirit to fill us.

16. And I will beg the Father, and he will give you another Comforter, that he may be with you for ever,

17. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn't looking for him and doesn't recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you. - John 14: 16, 17.

However, when the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth. For He will not speak on His own, but He will speak what He hears, and He will declare to you what is to come. - John 16: 13.

You, however, are controlled not by the flesh, but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ.
- Romans 8: 9.

The natural man does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God. For they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned. - 1 Corinthians 2: 14.

And as for you, the anointing you received from Him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But just as His true and genuine anointing teaches you about all things, so remain in Him as you have been taught. - 1 John 2: 27.

Whoever keeps His commandments remains in God, and God in him. And by this we know that He remains in us: by the Spirit He has given us.  - 1 John 3: 24.

We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. That is how we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of deception. - 1 John 4: 6.

If Spirit of God is in you, following God will not be a difficult one to you. During our tribulations, he will be there comforting us and showing us the right path. He help us to love God more and more. Do not take decision on your own because

He is double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. - James 1: 8.

So seek God to show his ways when you cannot understand him.

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives you liberally and without reproach and it will be given to him. - James 1: 5.

Do not let your desires to control you because we are no more old men, we are newly born in Christ so we seek to be with him. Our eyes should be set on him and not on this world.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. - Luke 12: 34.

Our treasure should be our Lord and not the world. But if you let yourself be controlled by your desires,

14. But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.

15. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full grown, brings forth death.

16. Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. - James 1: 14 - 16.

When your life becomes miserable because you did not try to change our heart, you should not blame God.

Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. - James 1: 13.

So tell him the reasons why you cannot marry him and leave him immediately. Everyone here tells you the same thing. If so many people tells the same thing, there is truth in it. Give it a thought and pray to God and ask him to guide you. God never gives something less than the perfection for his loving children.

Issac and Jacob did not marry Canaanites but they marry the girls chosen by their parents and God blessed them. Their descendants are the chosen ones. They waited till their age of forty. They did not set their eyes on the worldly women but on God. Issac met Rebekah when he was meditating in the field. He met his wife when he was praying to God. So he was a blessed man. We call our God as God of Issac.

But look at their brothers. Ishmael and Esau married the women they liked and ignored God's words. So they were not spiritually blessed men. We never associate our God to them.

He will do everything at the right time. We must learn to wait till it arrives.

And do not bring sorrow to God's Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. - Ephesians 4: 30.

Do not sorrow God and his Holy Spirit. Meditate on his words day and night.

Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path. - Psalm 119: 105.

2. But his delight is the law of the Lord, And in His law he meditates day and night.

3. He shall be like a tree, planted by the rivers of water, That brings forth its fruit in its season Whose leaf also shall not whither; And whatever he does shall prosper. - Psalm 1: 2,3.

because,

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. - John 15:7.

These were more fair-minded than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness, and searched the Scriptures daily to find out whether these things were so. - Acts 17: 11.

Devote your time for God instead for man and he will lead you in the right path. Do not be tempted, my dear sister. There is no short cuts to reach Jesus and God will not compromise his words.

Hope his Holy Spirit clear your doubts. Take care.

 

 

 

Thank your for this long message and thank you for telling me your story

But i start feel like people are dooming me to hell if i marry this man? Like if i marry him i can not go to heaven just because i disobeyed god? 

I do ask forgiveness from my sins and wish not to repeat them asking god to give me strength but this is another issue. 

I would not marry him any soon though. It would be after 2 or even 5 years from this so i have a lot time to consider everything.

4 minutes ago, RedwoodLady said:

Is your boyfriend emotionally manipulating you to marry him?  Is he making you feel guilty for his health problems?

Some people use their health as a way to manipulate a response from others.  I sure hope he isn't trying to guilt you into marrying him.

Well yes he has blamed me for his health problems sometimes but it's not about that.

I myself want to marry him so he is not forcing me. 

1 minute ago, RedwoodLady said:

Hi again, JNMRR. 

This is the second time you have said this.  I responded a couple posts back to the same statement I bolded above.  Please take a look and see what I said.

 

Hello! Thank you for the message. I just posted here the answer you can read it

2 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

In what way is it not possible to leave him?

My feelings to him and his health problems. I am pretty sure he would die (no i am not trying to predict his death but really he has been near death couple times already because our fights) if i left him because he can't stand it. I can't stand leaving him either and if he died because of that, i could not live with myself and that guilt.

2 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

Then why are you disobeying God in wanting to marry an unbeliever, as the bible states we are not to be yoked with unbelievers?

Again i need to repeat myself it seems. 

I told the situation is hard for me so it is not maybe possible to leave him. 

2 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

I am not being hateful but I am asking you a valid question. Whom do you love more, God or this man?

Alright, good then. I answered you and it is god. 

1 minute ago, shiloh357 said:

What do you mean that you "have similar thoughts with Muslims?" 

Like for example about the topic of modesty is one that i have similiar thoughts with them.

2 hours ago, kwikphilly said:

Blessings JMNRR

   Sweet Sister,,,,Look,I don't believe you are pranking us & even if you were it really  doesn't matter because we have many readers that could benefit greatly by this conversation ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,so,just so you know,I believe you are speaking honestly,,,,,you have not given me any reason to doubt you & if you do not take our advice then perhaps someone else WILL because of this God Blessed Ministry,,,,,,Praise jesus

    You have been very polite,courteous & you do answer every question anyone asks you,I appreciate that and I know that since you are still here having this discussion with us,there is still HOPE that you are not 100% set in your mind about what to do,,,,,Glory to God!

    Dear JMNRR,,,,,,I cannot express to you how concerned I am for your welfare,your future,,,I've lived a long time & have seen many things ,been many places,,,,,,,,,,,,if only you could know what we know from experience,,,,,,,,,,,if only you could avoid making mistakes because of others doing so,,,,,,I pray you do not be yoked "by marriage" to your boyfriend,,,,,this is what i see ahead...

Perhaps not literal "death"but it might as well be because life will be a mere "existence",,,,,,,,,things will change if you are "legally" bound,,,,,,that will reveal his "true colors" & sadly,there will be little HOPE for your children to escape this bondage     You said "if satan sent him" why would I have gotten closer to God afterward?It seems rather obvious to me & I don't know why you don't see it except for being deluded by your "feelings",,,,,,,It seems our Heavenly Father is drawing you unto Himself to take you away from the one who can cause you t o 'fall away',,,,had God NOT intervened you would not even be here asking these questions,you simply would have married him without hesitation

Don't do it Sister,don't do it    God is Calling,seek Him while He CAN BE FOUND(run,don't walk)                                 With love-in Christ,Kwik
 

Yes. I'm happy to hear you trust me, and how you have been friendly and loving in your responses.

Just now, John Robinson said:

There's a reason God put the warning in the Bible about yoking up with an unbeliever, but you know what? I've wasted enough time and brain cells on this craziness. Do as you wish.

I know that. Thank you, wish you the best.

2 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

????

He is from another country? If its a muslim majority country, you are in for a whole world of hurt. 

Anyway, you didnt answer my question in another post. Who do you love more? God or this man? 

Yes he does not live in Finland and it's possible i would need to marry him either in his country or here while i visit him or he visit me. Later then move together to Finland.

God but i am not doing something just when somebody tells me i should not. I listen to my insides and pray about it. 

Even if i married him, it does not mean i am damned to hell. 

Maybe my situation is too hard so it is not possible to leave him.

I thought i told here already that I AM A CHRISTIAN GIRL, NOT MUSLIM! 

I do believe that we get to heaven by accepting Jesus and not by good works. 

I do have similiar thoughts with Muslims but i am not one. 

I don't know really why everybody seem so hateful in here and replying with anger. 

I watched a document Islam Revisited by Pastor Steve Wohlberg and he interviewed people there. He did not seem hateful at all and he acknowledge how we both are children of Abraham and tell about the similiarities of Christianity and Islam and how to tell about Jesus to Muslims.

I recommend it to you all!

37 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

If you marry, you will have to state that mohammed is a prophet of God, if he wants an islamic marriage. That happened to my brother. Once that happens, you are considered to be muslim. 

No i do not need to state that mohammed is a prophet of god which seem not clear to you. 

I don't need to marry by islamic way,  the marrying can happen just by papers at the embassy if we live in different countries without any imams or religious men around. 

It's hard to say anything here anyway thanks for the advices. I'm not telling jokes here or anything btw

1 hour ago, blevn1 said:

Being a christian we have an understanding that there is no saving grace besides the faith we have in Christ. In believing this Do you think its a good idea to have your own flesh and blood the children God blesses you with to walk outside of the will of God?

It is not a good idea but i need to make compromises. 

He demands or have already decided they would be muslims so i can not do much more than tell the children about jesus if we would ever have them.

1 hour ago, John Robinson said:

JN, you're a free moral agent, and can do as you please. But if you marry this man, please, by all that's holy, don't bring children into this hellish union. They don't deserve it.

For proof, rent the movie (or read the book) called Not Without My Daughter. Starring Sally Field, it's a true story, and it concerns what happens when a Western woman did exactly what you're contemplating. She married a moderate Muslim man, but shortly after they had a daughter he made them both go to the Middle East for what he a called a "simple family reunion" with his people. Once there, that's when his mask came off. He treated them like dirt, threatening his wife with death.  How she escaped with her daughter reads like a thriller, but it's absolutely true. It will chill you to the bone.

So you suggest we should not have children even if we would marry ? Because that was option i was thinking while ago.

I have watched this movie and read book about christian women who married muslims and then escaped. 

Not all men are like them though. 

15 hours ago, ayin jade said:

According to islam, if the kids are muslims they can never ever convert to Christianity. 

This is a huge issue. 

In the end, you will do what you want to, but there is nothing good that can come out of this. You are going against the Lord in pursuing marriage to this man. 

They can convert to christianity but the only issue is they can get death threats like other people who have converted from islam to christianity. 

14 hours ago, shiloh357 said:

Oh, his attitude will change once you marry him and he knows you are stuck with him.  You will be forced to convert upon penalty of death, at some point.  He will say whatever he needs to say at this point to get you to marry him.  Things will change once he has you permanently.

We have gone through so much things and quarreling that most people would have broke up long time ago in same situation.. there won't be much anything new to this. 

I won't be forced and i can't be forced. 

I know him very well and how he can be. 

5 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

He is binding you to him out of guilt. He is clearly the dominate one in your relationship. If you marry him, he will be the spiritual leader in the home. Your faith will not strengthen. And any kids you have will be affected too. 

Any Christian who has married an unbeliever will tell you how rough it is. How they wished they hadnt done so. Its a constant spiritual battle. 

I know. I can agree with you on this though that it won't be easy and it will be a spiritual battle.

I said him i won't be a muslim and it is ok to him even though he wish i be muslim.

He demands the kids will be muslims and yes that's the big issue. 

27 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

Well you should JNMRR,,,,,I will tell you this,if I did not LOVE YOU,I certainly would not be wasting time here & neither would anyone else,,,,,,,,,,,,,I believe you are so blinded by how you"feel" about your  boyfriend that you cannot see this love & do you know what it is?   It is JESUS in us,that is Who Loves you & is moving through us to try t7o convict your heart,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,for HIM,,,,,,,

  I understand you both do not want to talk too much "religion" & that is all it will ever be ,dear  Sister,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,because when (& IF) you become unequally yoked with this man(the UNbeliever),,,,,,,,,the RELATIONSHIP will quickly fade away into 'religion".......we are here with you because we know it  will be a bad choice,,,,anytime ,any choice is between" whatever/whoever" OR JESUS,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,the race is over,lost    

    What if you told your boyfriend "I love Jesus First & cannot be with you unless you came to Christ",,,,,,,,,,,,,,,He wouldn't do it,why should you?

Yeah i see.

I tried to leave him few times by saying i think i cannot be with him.

He refused to leave me and because of his heart problems, he got into hospital and bad condition when he thought i would leave him.

Of course i could not leave him then and i felt so bad and later regret trying to leave him honestly.

I love jesus but if he was sent by satan to me, why then i got closer to god after i met him?

4 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

No, I merely asked you a question. I did not assume anything. If I assumed I would have said oh he must be a terrorist. Sheesh.

Alright then

16 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

See JMNRR,,,,,,people here LOVE you & do not want to see you make a bad ,life altering choice,,,,,,tell me this,how does he  feel about you being a Christian ,& tell the truth,okay    Does he know?

Yes i don't feel the love in here though

He would want me to become a muslim and he thinks i'm on the wrong path as me too think he is because he is not christian.

He is ok with me being a christian though as i am ok with him being a muslim. We try not to debate over religion.

I have told him about jesus but he does not want to accept him as the son of god so i can not do more than just to pray for him.

15 minutes ago, OakWood said:

I'm not trying to prove anything. I originally researched Islam (before I became a Christian) because I was curious about it - no prejudice, it's actually possible that I was in search of enlightenment - just curiosity really, but what I found out about it shocked me (although with hindsight it is no surprise). The subject fascinated me so much that I couldn't put it down and I devoted two years to careful research....... looking at both sides of the story, both pro-Islamic views and anti-Islamic views.

At the end of my research I came to the conclusion that it was evil, a conclusion shared by many other researchers.... and of course the fruits of this ideology (terrorism, misogyny, brutality) betray its true colours. It's not rocket science; just look at the results of this religion and the legacy that it leaves behind, it destroys everything good that it touches and everywhere it goes it brings poverty and a terrible infringement of human rights. Don't take my word for it - the proof is in the pudding. Not one country ruled by Islam is worth living in, be it Saudi Arabia, Iran, Somalia, Sudan or Pakistan.

Now of course you can continue to insult me further by telling me that I don't know how to research something (you'll be telling me that I don't know to read next lol) but that doesn't bother me. What bothers me is your unwillingness to check it out for yourself. I'm telling you this in your best interests but your emotional attachments are clouding your eyes. I don't blame you because we're all guilty of that sometimes, but if you don't seek the truth then you'll never find the answers.......

As for talking to Muslims - I know many of them, I work closely with two on a daily basis - nice fellows but they're even clueless about their own religion, they just go through the motions - praying five times a day, not eating pork and so on.... but they don't know the first thing about their own religion. They're actually impressed that I know more about the Q'uran than they do. But they can't see the sordid truth behind their ideology, or at least that's the impression that I get from them. It could be that they know more than they are letting on and are simply practising taqiyya (have you looked that up yet. like I told you to?)

 

Yes i see.

I am not insulting you, i think you yourself here attacked me.

And i meant ask muslims who really practice their faith and know their quran, so asking from your work buddies would not be so good idea since you say they do not know much about quran.

I know taqiyaa already but i can not remember everything by name. Patience with me please.

2 minutes ago, OakWood said:

What do you expect him to say, honestly?

His opinion. I don't know if you knew that most muslims do not support ISIS and they do flee the country because of ISIS. You know immigrants!

7 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

I got this from checking out the muslim charities my in laws donated to. I found out to my horror that they obliquely support terrorism (according to the us govt). 

This is a list on wiki of muslim charities that support terrorism. Some appear to be quite harmless. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_charities_accused_of_ties_to_terrorism

My brothers in laws supported at least one charity I know that has ties to terrorism.

It is required to support muslim charities. If he found out that a charity supported terrorism, would he renounce the charity or continue to support it?

What is this? I told you he is a muslim and you say rightaway he is funding terrorism..what rly you can't be serious.

Of course he would not support terrorism.

He has said to me myself that ISIS are just terrorists and not real muslims.

1 minute ago, ayin jade said:

I am curious. He wont let you come to personal harm, but would he support muslim charities that are known to fund terrorism? Not letting harm come to you isnt quite the same as not letting harm come to others. 

"but would support muslim charities that are known to fund terrorism" where did you get this from?

He would also protect his family and in some cases it is possible he would have to kill the one that is trying to kill his family/wife.