I have been to two Al Anon classes now.  Already it has really helped me opened my eyes.  I now see how long I have been in denial about how bad things were getting, and for how long.  For anyone reading this who is also living with alcoholism in the family, please find an Al Anon group.  One day at a time, one step at a time, your healing can begin.  To everyone who has offered personal experiences, advice, and prayers.... thank you.  I am so grateful for all of you. God bless each and every one of you all.   

I am hurting really bad right now.  I just did the hardest thing I have ever had to do.  I just informed my wife that I filed for divorce.  I did not come to this decision lightly.  It is with a heavy broken heart that i do this.  I ask for prayers for her, for our children, and for myself.

37 minutes ago, eileenhat said:

The last person I began to see, until 2011, developed alcoholism as well.

I gave him an herbal formula to help fight this disease, but he refused to take it.  He had no money and was hooked on anti-depressants.  They left him with little will power (and as we are just learning, atrophy the brain).  A friend was housing him and after my failed marriage, I decided to keep a healthy distance from him, until he decided whether to live or die, from his disease.

He's dead now.

 

I am so sorry for your loss.  I truly appreciate your sharing your experiences.  I know it must bring back some painful memories.

RED ALERT

My wife was arrested this Saturday morning for dwi.  Of course nothing I have said or done since has been anything she wants to hear.  I was able to bail her out same day.  I am at a complete loss.  On the one hand, i know she needs help.  On the other hand, she wouldn't even listen to me when I explained how to fill out her part of the bond agreement.  She refused to fill out all of the references until the bondsman told her she had to. I feel so lost, and powerless.

Thank you all for your prayers.  It means so much to me, having y'alls support.  I know that everything will work out according to our heavenly father's will.  I must simply keep putting my faith in him.

Thank you all for the very interesting discussion.  After reaching out to many people within my church family regarding this subject I must admit my understanding was flawed.  I have adjusted accordingly and am grateful for the opportunity for growth.  It is wonderful how our journey in faith is never ending.  Having a dynamic, and active relationship with our lord and savior is truly awesome.  I am blessed to be able to be part of this community.

Peace

2 minutes ago, john1 said:

Matthew chapter 9 verse 6

But I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins." So he said to the paralyzed man, "Get up, take your mat and go home."

 

Unless he doesn't want us to know a priest has authority, to forgive sins.

 

 

Jesus and his apostles did many miracles to show their authority.

 

But I can't say I'm right, it's just not my belief.

I am not saying anybody is right or wrong.   The whole point of this intellectual debate, is the debate itself.  I never intended for there to be a "winner " declared.  Simply deep, thoughtful discussion. ?

14 minutes ago, Dennis1209 said:

A lot easier to copy and paste my thoughts on the subject.

Verse 23. Whose soever sins, &c. Cmt. on Mt 16:19 Cmt. on Mt 18:18. It is worthy of remark here that Jesus confers the same power on all the apostles. He gives to no one of them any peculiar authority. If Peter, as the Papists pretend, had been appointed to any peculiar authority, it is wonderful that the Saviour did not here hint at any such pre-eminence. This passage conclusively proves that they were invested with equal power in organizing and governing the church. The authority which he had given Peter to preach the gospel first to the Jews and the Gentiles, does not militate against this. Cmt. on Mt 16:18, Cmt. on Mt 16:19. This authority given them was full proof that they were inspired. The meaning of the passage is not that man can forgive sins--that belongs only to God (Isa 43:23), but that they should be inspired; that in founding the church, and in declaring the will of God, they should be taught by the Holy Ghost to declare on what terms, to what characters, and to what temper of mind God would extend forgiveness of sins. It was not authority to forgive individuals, but to establish in all the churches the terms and conditions on which men might be pardoned, with a promise that God would confirm all that they taught; that all might have assurance of forgiveness who would comply with those terms; and that those who did not comply should not be forgiven, but that their sins should be retained. This commission is as far as possible from the authority which the Roman Catholic claims of remitting sin and of pronouncing pardon.

{z} "Whose soever" Mt 16:19; 18:18

Matthew 16:18New International Version (NIV)

¹⁸ And I tell you that you are Peter,^[a] and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades^[b] will not overcome it.

6 minutes ago, Rick_Parker said:

Christ told us that if one rejects Christ that we are to walk away from them. They will not be saved since they will have rejected Christ. As for priests, many of whom are guilty themselves of some evil, they cannot forgive sins. Catholicism is a cult.

Ouch, labels can be harsh.  Though I respect your opinion, and your right to one.

1 minute ago, Yowm said:

I always wonder about the part in red...

And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, "Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld."
(Joh 20:22-23)
 

It's easy to declare a person's sins are forgiven based on their confession, but on what basis will one individual withhold another's forgiveness...that seems to fall under Church (corporate) discipline.

Precisely.  So far we have only discussed the forgiveness part.  As far as I know, the only unforgivable sin is to deny Christ to your last dying breath.

29 minutes ago, eileenhat said:

This has remain a mystery because gentiles in the last 2,000 years were not granted the holy spirit advanced powers as the apostles were.  We are more in the disciple category.

Hence not only could they heal the sick, but grant forgiveness, as Christ once did.  They acted in his stead, while they were living, thus establishing the holy Church for him as no other way would have worked.  That power of the holy spirit did not pass to anyone they taught however.  We are granted access to the guidance of the holy spirit, but prophecy and related powers have not been granted.

We've experienced individual healing from God, the establishment of learning to use the elders of the Church to help heal others and so forth.  All lesser abilities.

There is mention in the Bible of the arrival of more advanced holy spirit gifts at this time, ie. the time of Jacob's troubles as seen in Rev. 11 with the two witnesses being able to wield power (ie. fire out of their mouths) and mention of prophets arising (Mark Taylor, Kim Clement).

And yet, who is to say that our heavenly father isn't watching us right now, just waiting for us to follow through with what these verses say? I figured this would be a super interesting topic.  I love the responses it is getting.   I love deep, and meaningful conversation.  Even if everyone has a differing belief about the subject.

1 minute ago, Rick_Parker said:

I believe that what Christ was saying is that if one receives the Holy Spirit that one has the power to lead others to Christ through the Holy Spirit and therefore that persons sins are forgiven, Only the Finished Work of Jesus Christ on the Cross has the Power to forgive sin. Man cannot forgive sin, only Christ.

And yet in verse 23 Jesus very clearly tells them that any sin they forgive, is forgiven.  If you remove all interpretation and take him word for word, that is.

32 minutes ago, john1 said:

I don't know what Jesus is saying there, because he died for the sins of the whole world, by this verse.

1 John chapter 2 verse 2

He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.

And these next two verses.

Proverbs chapter 10 verse 12

Love covers all wrongs.

1 Peter chapter 4 verse 8

Love covers a great many sins.

Those are all excellent examples arguing your point.  And I am not disagreeing with your point.  I am just intrigued by the idea that Jesus felt the need to tell his followers that they have received the Holy Spirit, and they now have the authority to forgive sins.  And being Catholic, I believe that John 20:22-23 validates the point that by the power of the Holy Spirit, and with the authority handed down by Jesus Christ, a priest can forgive sins.  This in no way brings glory to the priest.  All power of forgiveness still has The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit as its origin. Again, this is only my understanding.  In absolutely no way do I claim to be more right in this than anyone else.

John 20:22-23New International Version (NIV)

²² And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit.²³ If you forgive anyone’s sins, their sins are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.”

My understanding of these two verses is as follows... He who has received the Holy Spirit has been given the authority to forgive sins by Jesus Christ.  

Your thoughts?

1 hour ago, missmuffet said:

I am only hearing one side of the issue. Are you a Christian? Are you a praying person? If that is the case then you should first of all take this to God. Have you sat down with her and told her everything that is on your heart and your concerns? Maybe you can both come up with ways to fix this if your marriage is important to both of you. You have to remember the vows that you took before God and why you took those vows to begin with.

You are right for keeping a healthy dose of skepticism when hearing only one person's point of view on an issue like this.  I wish more people would refrain from jumping to conclusions prematurely.  In this particular case, I am not asking anyone to do much more than pray for us.  I understand counsel will be limited based on the circumstances. I needed a place to speak what was on my mind, to voice my concerns, and to be acknowledged. When I bring up my concerns to my wife she shuts down and refuses to speak to me.  She finds a way to turn it around and say that I would be better off without her, that I deserve better, and that she will leave so she isn't my problem anymore.  It is I, who is left fighting to keep my marriage together, even though she is the one going down this dark path.  Like I said, it is exhausting, and painful.

2 minutes ago, missmuffet said:

Did you see these things before you married her? Does your wife need help for her drinking? Is she in denial and will she seek help?

No, this developed over time.  She freely admits she has a problem.  She refuses to listen and therefore is either in denial about the damage it is causing our family, or she doesn't care.  I truly hate to think it is the latter of the two.

Thank you everyone for your words of wisdom, and prayers.  Yes, I am a Christian.  My wife believes, but chooses not to practice her faith.  Alcohol is her vice, and it has gotten to the point that she would rather go negative in our bank account than to abstain. She curses God for her grandfather's battle lost to cancer.  We literally can't afford counseling due to recovery from Hurricane Harvey, and she has already lost her car to repossession.  I gave her mine to drive and got myself a hoopty from a family member just to get back and forth to work.  I know she loves me,  but I can't tell sometimes if she cares whether or not we make it.  If it only affected me, then so be it.  But we have two little boys to raise, and her decisions and actions are making it so difficult.  It is so exhausting, and so painful at times.

Littlestarsmum, we have just been hits so hard financially lately.  Hurricane Harvey was pretty devistatingin our whole area, not just my house.  We lost two cars, one was almost paid for, the other we were upside down on, I took a new job that required a substantial pay cut, and I am trying to help a father in law who is going through divorce, eviction, and repossession of vehicle, by feeding him and letting him stay at our place while he also gets back on his feet.... It's a bit overwhelming.  I am trying to keep in mind that none of it belongs to me.  Everything I have God entrusted me with.   It is only mine to share. 

Thank you all for the prayers.  Merry Christmas and God Bless.

As the title says, I think my marriage is failing and I don't know what to do anymore.  Recent events have me concerned that my wife and I are so unequally yoked that this next year could be our very last together.  I do not blame 100 percent responsibility for this on either one of us: we are in this together.  Our success, and/or failure, is on both of us.  I can work on fixing whats wrong with me, but obviously I cannot correct her mistakes or choices.  I am not sure she cares enough anymore to do what I can't.