Most of my life, since I was about 8 or 9 years old, I have known God and Jesus. Obviously a lot happens in life between the age of 8 through 42. I have been in and out of church, I have had a lot of bad experiences with people in churches. Lately I feel the need to seek answers about God and Jesus and creation. Why certain things exist, why do animals have fangs if we were all created as vegetarians, what language is the proper language to pray in, do we address God as God or Yaweah, or Jesus as Yeshua or Jesus? I have so many questions popping in my head and I have been seeking answers for them all. I tend to find solutions but I just don't understand why I think up all of these things. Is God trying to get me to study him more? IS Lucifer trying to confuse my mind? AM I just overly critical of everything? I'm not sure what is going on in my mind. I do know that I want to pray right. I want to call God what he wants us to call him, I want to feel close to him and feel forgiven. I feel sometimes like I am on my own but God is pulling me. I have asked for forgiveness several times, in fact I ask daily. I feel unworthy all the time and undeserving. So many thoughts and fears linger in my head. I just wish I could find answers to ease my mind on everything that I think of.
