Aba

On 12/22/2017 at 8:27 AM, worthlessness1979 said:

As I was browsing the internet, I came across the story of a 13 year old boy who was severely beaten and tortured because he was accused of stealing a bike, which turned out to not be true. He was beaten by four men, while another man video taped it and placed it on social media. This was in Bangladesh. There was a video of him getting beaten and tortured. I did not watch the video and I won't watch the video. But I could see his face, and he was in so much pain.

 

This just breaks my heart. I know it is very girly for a grown man to say that this breaks my heart. But I don't care. It does. I cannot get the images out of my head.

 

It hurts so much to think of what that boy went through. I keep to imagining that I am that little boy getting beaten like that. I also Imagine that I was that boy's parents. I don't think I could survive knowing that somebody cause so much pain to someone that I loved. It hurts so much and I didn't even know that kid. This happens to me all the time and I hate having so much empathy towards people. I cried for hours and hours when I think of the people suffering like this. Well, that's an over-exaggeration I don't cry for hours but I cry a lot. I can't get the images out of my head

 

The face of pain and the face of suffering. The boy crying out. That boy probably cried out to his mother and she was not there. Imagine being that mother and knowing or thinking that your son is crying out for you while he is suffering and you were not there. Well, in my case of course, imagine being a father who was not there for his son.

 

I hate having so much empathy towards people, it is a curse

 

And sometimes it is very hard to talk to other Christians about these things, because then they go off on you and say well you are just as evil as they are. I know that scripture says that if we break one commandment we break them all. But that doesn't mean that I cannot be upset about this. That doesn't mean that I can't feel for that little kid. It doesn't mean that I can't pray for justice for that kid. And it also doesn't mean that I can't hurt for the family. It wasn't just that kid that suffered, it was his parents I'm sure.

 

But Justice was served. Those men got the death penalty. But I am still saddened and hurt by this.

 

How do I have less empathy towards people? How can I not let it destroy me?

Oh wow! What horrible so called Christian told you that your empathy is a bad thing? I can’t even believe they said that! The Bible clearly says to be loving and compassionate towards eachother. Your empathy might feel like a curse but I’m sure God loves that you care about others. He can definitely use that more in people. I actually wish I had more empathy towards people. You see in my case, I grew cold towards people over the years, I have a lot of sympathy for animals though. I have actually been asking God to soften my heart so I can serve him the way he wants me to. As for how to not let it destroy you, I’m not sure how to answer that. Because I can’t relate. 

On 12/28/2017 at 5:09 PM, Przemek said:

Hi Brothers and Sisters im 17 years old and it is my first post on this forum. I Have a great problem with myself and my relationship with God. Im going to start with my testimony. I was born again one month ago, it was wonderful feeling i never felt that way before. I was changed completely i no longer swear, smoke or drink etc. I was so spiritualy awake, my friends didnt recognise me. My Mother was so happy because she is also a believer and she had gone through it. Since this time im all about Jesus Christ. I wont go more into details because that is not the case.

 

The case is that since this time i failed the lord everyday and im still failing him right now. I left all computer games wrong music etc. But i didnt share the gospel how i should. I feel so ashamed of the gospel when im about to share it. Ofcorse i told my closest friends about it, but it is not the main topic in our conversations. Every time i meet with them i feel so bad because im not talking about Jesus and when im about to talk about Him i feel this great fear and then when im back home im So ashamed i didnt share the gospel with them. I've felt into depression and im in it for 3 weeks (i was happy with Jesus for only one week :(). I really take the words of Jesus seriously that we have to deny ourselves, that many are called but few are chosen. I took it so seriously that i left my piano lessons because it interupted time i could spend with God. I thought to myself that surely it would make God happy. But still i feel like i have buried my talent (not musical but spiritual) and i know i did it :(((. I didnt share the gospel and now if i would share it, it would be only because of fear not of love. God's presence has left me. im So spiritualy dead now i have no Joy at all, im just afraid of God because im failing him every second. I dont love Him at all, but i know i should! it is main purpose in human life. I really cant find in myself any love for God and other people and that makes me so mad! I know that im wicked servant and if Jesus would come tommorrow he would cast me into outer darkness... At the beginning it was so wonderful i was being convinced by the Holy Spirit about things that i should do and shouldnt do. I was getting those small revelations when reading the Bible, and all of that has left me... Now it is only pain and fear. I dont know if it does any sense for you but if anyone could help me or give me advice then please... Maybe someone had similar experience. 

God bless 

Well the I can tell you something positive about your situation, at least you had the born again experience. I never felt that sense of joy when I was on my face crying for forgiveness. All I have ever felt is worthless and condemned. I have horrible thoughts in my head all day and even when I’m trying to sleep. On top of that I am in an unequally yoked marriage and I fear for my husbands salvation as well.  I’m not telling you this so you’ll pity me. I’m telling you this so you know you are not alone. I know how alone and horrible something like this can make you feel. It’s awful, more awful than any feeling I’ve ever felt. I hope that you find peace, I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. 

On 2/10/2018 at 10:32 PM, LeslieAnn said:

My major depression has turned into deep discouragement and frustration which I’ve been fighting for 38 yrs.  It has been affecting my spiritual walk with Christ within the past two weeks.   I am just getting so tired of fighting.  I am on medication and see an excellent doctor but I have no desire to do anything...I will sit on my couch for hours and not accomplish anything.  I need a job and have no motivation to pursue one.  My heart & body hurt ?over this.  I am just so tired and frustrated.  This depression is such a major bondage that I don’t understand why God is allowing it?  I have asked over and over that He take this away.  I don’t know if my heart can take anymore.

 

I’m right there with you on this. I’m battling it to for various reasons. I just keep thinking.....when Am I going to have my breakthrough? It’s so hard when you are depressed and anxious all the time, it makes it hard to think positive and trust God. I’ll put you in my prayers. *sigh* although that hasn’t been going well either. 

56 minutes ago, Unwavering Faith said:

Oh I completely understand you. I am in prayer for my husbands salvation. When we met neither of us were rooted in the word. Now, I am, and praying for his salvation has been a battle. Not a battle between he and I but between the forces of evil and darkness. It just seems like as soon as I got into God's word and started praying for his salvation Satan has been at work overtime to discourage me. One day can be beautiful  and then the next day or sometimes the next moment he will say something or do something that is completely against what I am praying for. It is very difficult and very discouraging I know God's timing is perfect. I know He hears me and I just have to wait patiently for him to move in my husbands life. I see subtle changes already and I have to praise God for that. I know He is working in him. God will send him through something where all he has to look to will be Him. He did the same for me, and I am thankful for it everyday. Trust me I know what you are going through, I am going through it as well. I cry almost everyday. But in the midst of my tears I praise God because I know He has heard me and is answering my prayer everyday. The breakthrough won't happen overnight, but when it does I will have a praising partner. You will too. Just keep the faith my sister. Don't give up on God, He hears you and is working on your husband, just as he is working on mine. God bless. I am praying for you

Thank you for sharing that with me. I feel so alone sometimes. Yes our stories are very similar, I will pray for us all. 

13 minutes ago, missmuffet said:

You married him knowing he was JW? Perhaps you should pray to God for you and your husband. Ask that God will open up your heart to Him so that you will ask Him into your life to be your Lord and Savior. Give God your life 100% and put Him in the drivers seat of your life. If God is in the passengers seat change seats. Then you can pray for your husband for his salvation.

Yes I did marry him. because back then I didn’t care about religion and he is a good man and I loved him, and still love him. Please don’t throw judgement my way. That’s the last thing I need right now is for someone to make me feel worse. And I did say in my post that I have been praying for both of us. 

I’m writing this because I need some relief from the pain, and maybe some advice. Every since I started seeking God I’ve felt like there is a wall between me and my husband. It’s not that he’s being difficult or trying to hinder me in my journey with God, in fact he’s been very supportive to a point. But his thoughts aren’t the same as mine anymore. At least not all of them. You see my husband was raised a Jehovah’s Witness. Now he doesn’t practice it anymore but he said if he ever did go back to religion it would be that one. Not because it’s his favorite or anything but because that’s what his parents believe( they don’t believe in an eternal hell). I consider myself non-denomination. My husband is a very kind man, I sometimes am amazed at how much this man loves and cares about me. He has forgiven me for some very bad things I did and stood with me through my worst. Today he even told me that he is going to give me the whole state tax return to give to a charity because he knows it’s important to me.  We have been best friends and married for 14 years now. But when I look at him now, I see someone who is lost and I start to think about him suffering for eternity. I’ve already tried to explain to him that his parents are wrong about their view on hell, and I’ve tried to lead him to the correct doctrine but he isn’t believing it. I stopped pushing the issue because I don’t want to push him away from it by trying to force it down his throat. I’m not trying to say I’m perfect, I am struggling in my walk with God but I’m aware of it and trying to do something about it. When I look at him I might be smiling at him on the outside but on the inside im screaming and crying. Im hurting so much on the inside. I want us to be on the same page and have the same understanding. I feel like Any day I could loose him and it would be too late. I cry a lot over him, sometimes I have to hold my breath until after he leaves for work so I can cry as soon as he walks out the door. At the same time, im trying fix things that I’m doing wrong and overcome strongholds in my life. I feel so drained and sad. It feels very heavy on my heart, and it’s making things so much harder for me. I know I’m not responsible for his salvation, and I’ve told myself that. But I can’t help but worry about him. I have prayed for him a lot but not sure God hears me because I’m not completely righteous yet. I know he only hears the prayers of the righteous.  I often talk to God, not knowing if he’s listening or not but I figure what can it hurt? I tell him all the time that my husband has great potential to be a good Christian and do many kind things. I beg and plead with God to help him. But so far....nothing. I don’t know what to do anymore.