dazeddaisy

I hate going through these waves. I'll be really on fire for God for a couple weeks, cutting out worldly music, fellowshipping with other believers, working on Christian projects, and so on. Then, I slowly start falling back. It's like, in a moment, I forget everything I was focused on in the weeks before, and I don't remember until I'm really feeling convicted. I feel as though in these moments, I'm not taking God and his gift of salvation as seriously as I should. Really--why is something that amazing slipping from my memory? And I really hate that. I really hate feeling far away from God. I used to never notice when I was living the way that I used to live, but now it pains me. So here's my question: how do I come back to God after I've fallen away and then stay there?

I've never thought about it this way, but it makes a lot of sense! Thank you everyone for all your responses.

I'm no longer interested in this person, but thank you for the advice! I'm sure it'll come in handy in the future. I probably could have written the OP better, but what I meant was this: A few years ago, while I was in high school, I was infatuated with a person in a way that I shouldn't have been. It led me into several sins (idolatry, lust, astrology, tarot cards, law of attraction, and other new age/occult things). All the while, I was asking God to bless my obsession. God broke me of that by removing him from my life (we went to different colleges), and we haven't spoken since. In the present day, I wanted to pray over this person. (Not "for" them in the sense that they'd date me lol.) I think I convinced myself that they were having some kind of spiritual issue that I needed to pray for them for--when they never told me so. (As if I needed to "save" when I know well and good that only Jesus saves. That was the first red flag.) I didn't feel peace about praying for him in this manner, so I questioned whether or not that desire was from God. I asked God, family, friends, and this forum, and I've decided to leave it alone. I feel much more peace from this decision.

I wasn't sure how to phrase the title, but here's my question: How do I glorify God in my hobbies and the things that I enjoy? I have been trying to strengthen my relationship with the Lord. Recently, I've stopped listening to and watching pretty much everything secular because those things negatively affected that relationship. I've been trying to fill that space with listening to more gospel music, audio recordings of the Bible, Christian YouTube channels, sermons, etc. However, I enjoy things like singing, drawing, playing music, listening to musical theater, writing books and poetry, reading comics, and so on. How do I glorify God while doing these things? Do they have to be explicitly "Christian" to bring Him glory? Do you have any recommendations for media in these areas that you think do glorify Him?

I think I was obsessed with this person (yikes! Thank God for deliverance), but I don't think I have OCD. I've never been diagnosed, and I've never really had any other obsessive tendencies anywhere else in my life. At the time of obsession/infatuation, however, I was in a very spiritually dark place (involving some new age/occultism) that I'm certain exacerbated the issue. Add onto that that this person was a "first love" of sorts, and it's a recipe for disaster. I have given the situation to God for certain. I never want to go back to where I was, which is why this situation was so concerning. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. When I say I was DEEP in sin because of the way I idolized this person, I mean it. God told me even while I was sinning that I shouldn't attach myself to that person. When I tried to go against His will, He removed him from my life. As upset as I was at the time, God has convicted me. I really don't want to run the risk of going back to where I was.

I don't, which is another reason why I felt this was of the flesh, rather than of God. As if I, subconsciously, wanted to continue to idolize this person, so I created a "problem" in my mind that they needed my prayer for. Obviously, that's not okay. Thank you for your input! Out of curiosity, why do you say that "God wants intelligent accurate prayers from us, that show that we understand the situation and praying for the 'good' of that person"? I don't disagree; I've just never heard prayer described this way and would like to learn something

Thank you so very much for responding! I think your answer is the best that I've received over the past couple of days. Especially the line "And, at times, it can even try to cleverly justify our negative thoughts to be as if intentionally planted by the Lord." I absolutely feel that this is what happened, considering the timing. (I start growing closer to God, and all of a sudden I want to pray for this person I used to put before God? Yeah, sounds like a trick.) I have been repenting of this, but it's only recently that I've called it what it was, which is idolatry. Thank you so very much for your encouragement!

I'm in an odd situation, one that led me to this forum to begin with. Recently, I've been trying to use a prayer journal and pray for specific individuals. In that time, I've felt a very strong desire to pray for an individual that I used to be infatuated with, whom I have not been in contact with in some years. The problem: back then, I idolized and lusted after this person. I genuinely placed them before God in pretty much every area of my life. Ex: he was on the worship band, so I stared at him during worship. He was funny, so I always thought of his jokes during church services. I would be so upset on days that he wouldn't talk to me, but I rarely ever prayed. (I know, I'm ashamed just thinking about it.) God told me in no uncertain terms that this person was not the one for me, even when I was still trying to hold on. Back to the present: I am actively trying to stop thinking about this person, and though it's taken some time, I've been mostly successful. I've been more focused on growing in my relationship with God than ever before, and I'm almost always in prayer. I have felt a call to pray for that person, their walk with Christ, their resistance to temptation, finding a community of believers, and so on. However, I do not trust my intentions. I don't know if this is truly God moving on my heart to pray for this person, or if this is me trying to stay attached to this person through prayer. If this is God's will, I don't want my fears to stop me--especially if this person really is wrestling with their faith. However, if this is just my flesh, I don't want to let myself fall back into old patterns of sin (lust and idolatry). So I guess my question is, is this God or my flesh talking? What advice would you give me on handling this situation? I have asked God for confirmation on whether or not this is Him. I have also asked a family member, a couple people who are more spiritually mature than me, and a couple friends. Now I'm asking for your input. Please help! Thanks!