Missy

http://www.leftbehind.com/article.asp?Loc_...55&ep=16952

New Left Behind book is coming out in less than 2 weeks!

S.C. Anderson

PO Box 1302

Minnetonka, MN 55345

Superior Health Insurance

ATTN: Claims Review

1423 W. 90th St.

New York, NY 05016

Dear Sir:

This letter is in response to your recent letter requesting a more detailed explanation concerning my recent internment at Methodist Hospital. Specifically, you asked for an expansion in reference to Block 21(a)(3) of the claim form (reason for hospital visit). On the original form, I put "Stupidity." I realize now that this answer was somewhat vague and so I will attempt to more fully explain the circumstances leading up to my hospitalization. I had needed to use the restroom and had just finished a quick bite to eat at the local burger joint. I entered the bathroom, took care of my business, and just prior to the moment in which I had planned to raise my trousers, the locked case that prevents theft of the toilet paper in such places came undone and, feeling it striking my knee, unthinkingly, I immediately, and with unnecessary force, returned the lid back to its normal position.

Unfortunately, as I did this I also turned and certain parts of my body, which were still exposed, were trapped between the device's lid and its main body. Feeling such intense and immediate pain caused me to jump back. It quickly came to my attention that, when one's privates are firmly attached to an unmovable object, it is not a good idea to jump in the opposite direction. Upon recovering some of my senses, I attempted to reopen the lid. However, my slamming of it had been sufficient to allow the locking mechanism to engage. I then proceeded to get a hold on my pants and subsequently removed my keys from them. I intended to try to force the lock of the device open with one of my keys; thus extracting myself. Unfortunately, when I attempted this, my key broke in the lock.

Embarrassment of someone seeing me in this unique position became a minor concern, and I began to call for help in as much of a calm and rational manner as I could. An employee from the restaurant quickly arrived and decided that this was a problem requiring the attention of the store manager. Betty, the manager, came quickly. She attempted to unlock the device with her keys. Since I had broken my key off in the device, she could not get her key in. Seeing no other solution, she called the EMS (as indicated on your form in block 21(b)(1)). After approximately 15 minutes, the EMS arrived, along with two police officers, a fire-rescue squad, and the channel 4 "On-the- Spot" news team. The guys from the fire department quickly took charge as this was obviously a rescue operation. The senior member of the team discovered that the device was attached with bolts to the cement wall that could only be reached once the device was unlocked. His discovery was by means of tearing apart the device located in the stall next to the one that I was in. (Since the value of the property destroyed in his examination was less than $50 (my deductible) I did not include it in my claim.) His partner, who seemed like an intelligent fellow at the time, came up with the idea of cutting the device from the wall with the propane torch that was in the rescue truck.

The fireman went to his truck, retrieved the torch, and commenced to attempt to cut the device from the wall. Had I been in a state to think of such things, I might have realized that in cutting the device from the wall several things would also inevitably happen. First, the air inside of the device would quickly heat up, causing items inside the device to suffer the same effects that are normally achieved by placing things in an oven. Second, the metal in the device is a good conductor of heat causing items that are in contact with the device to react as if thrown into a hot skillet. And, third, molten metal would shower the inside of the device as the torch cut through. The one bright note of the propane torch was that it did manage to cut, in the brief time that I allowed them to use it, a hole big enough for a small pry bar to be placed inside of the device.

The EMS team then loaded me, along with the device, into the waiting ambulance as stated on your form. Due the small area of your block 21(a)(3), I was unable to give a full explanation of these events, and thus used the word which I thought best described my actions that led to my hospitalization.

Sincerely,

S.C. Anderson

The Creation of the Fire Fighter

When the Lord was creating fire fighters, he was into his sixth day of

overtime when an angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling

around on this one."

And the Lord said, "Have you read the specification on this person? Fire fighters have to be able to go for hours fighting fires or tending to a person that the usual everyday person would never touch, while putting in the back of their minds the circumstances. They have to be able to movet a second's notice and not think twice of what they are about to do, no matter what danger. They have to be in top physical condition at all times, running on half-eaten meals, and they must have six pairs of hands."

The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands...no way." "It's not the hands that are causing me problems," said the Lord, "it's the three pairs of eyes a fire fighter has to have."

"That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. The Lord nodded. "One pair to see through the fire and where they and their fellow fire fighters should fight the fire next. Another pair here in the side of the head to see their fellow fire fighters and keep them safe. And another pair of eyes in the front so that they can look for the victims caught in the fire who need their help."

"Lord," said the angel, touching his sleeve, "rest and work on this tomorrow." "I can't," said the Lord, "I already have a model that can carry a 250-pound man down a flight of stairs to safety from a burning building, and can feed a family of five on a civil service paycheck."

The angel circled the model of the fire fighter very slowly, "Can it think?" "You bet," said the Lord. "They can tell you the elements of a hundred fires and can recite procedures in their sleep that are needed to care for a person until they reach the hospital. And all the while they have to keep their wits about them. Fire fighters also have phenomenal personal control.

They can deal with a scene full of pain and hurt, coaxing a child's mother into letting go of the child so that they can care for the child in need. And still they rarely get the recognition for a job well done from anybody, other than from fellow fire fighters."

Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the fire fighter. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "Lord, it's a tear. What's the tear for?

"It's a tear from bottled-up emotions for fallen comrades. A tear for commitment to that funny piece of cloth called the American flag. It's a tear for all the pain and suffering they have encountered. And it's a tear for their commitment to caring for and saving lives of their fellow man!"

"What a wonderful feature. Lord, you're a genius," said the angel.

The Lord looked somber and said, "I didn't put it there."

HOW YOU UNDRESS REVEALS YOUR PERSONALITY

Psychiatrist Dr. Frank Caprio gives the following breakdown:

HAPHAZARD UNDRESSER: If you throw your clothes all over the house, you are a friendly, life-of-the-party type. You are free with your thoughts and opinions, not caring much about what others think of you.

METICULOUS UNDRESSER: If you remove each piece of clothing and put it away carefully, you are a serious person who likes life very calm. You are comfortable with routine, and you believe that the best way to deal with life's problems is to prevent them in the first place.

SHOES AND SOCKS FIRST UNDRESSER: You are perfectionist, very shy, observant, dependable, intense, and think before making decisions. You go about your tasks methodically, with concentration. You know how to pay attention.

SLOW UNDRESSER: f you take off the shirt, and ten minutes later get around to the pants, you areextremely self-confident, intellectual, a deep thinker, and don't like to be hassled.Usually you like a lot of free time for yourself.

FAST UNDRESSER:If you get out of your clothes as quickly as possible, you are concerned about=others and what they expect from you, but you're worried about your own needs.You are family-oriented, and stay extremely busy.

JEWELRY OFF FIRST UNDRESSER: If you take off your rings, watch, etc., before anything else, you are warm, thoughtful, sensitive, and romantic.

NEVER THE SAME WAY UNDRESSER:If you never do it the same way twice, you are a very curious, interesting person,and you enjoy a broad range of activities. You take risks and enjoy fun and adventure

I love this. It is a very large wakeup call!

Amen!

God is so good!

I give you praise Lord God Almighty!

For without You in my life I would be nothing.

For without You in my life I would be nothing.

You have rescued me from the firey pit and set me up high on a pedastal.

Redeemed.

Renewed.

Sanctified.

Justified.

Washed clean.

Made worthy.

Father I love You with all that I am and I worship You and praise You all the day!

I've seen that before - it's good!

Gas here - Colorado Springs - right now is $1.68 a gallon - just about as high as when 9/11 happened.

Propane, which was only $.98 a gallon in January is now $1.38 a gallon! It was $322.37 to fill my propane tank (our heat and hot water) on Tuesday!   Unbelievable!

BUT I think about when I lived in Germany and it cost $110 (US funds) to fill my tank on my mini-van! Thankfully we had gas coupons that we bought at the PX so it cost us only about $40 to fill our tank twice. But if you filled your tank and didn't have enough coupons to pay for the whole fill, you had to pay the whole thing in German Marks cash or credit card.  It happened ONCE - lesson learned after that!

Amen and Amen and AMEN!!

He is just so good! So incredibly good! I love Him so much!   :inlove: There are no words to describe how awesome He is, is there? We should make up a word! LOL!

Sing praises to the Lord! If you don't know the story you can see my thread in prayer requests - no heat electric soon - or something like that - that I just posted the other day.

He has reminded me that He doesn't forget about us, He never leaves us and never forsakes us - EVER!  AMEN!!!

Richard - awesome post! thank you so much for shani with us!

Brothers and sisters - please go see my praise thread in the Praise Forum!

Brothers and sisters!  I have a miracle to report! Tuesday I cried out to the Lord and told Him that I just could not take the financial problems anymore - hardly no food, electric about to be cut off, heat about to run out, etc. and that I was giving complete and total control of the situation over to Him. The horrid feeling I had had in my belly disappeared immediately, I had immediate peace and I knew it was going to be ok!

BOY IS IT EVER OK!!!  Our Lord has provided. He has provided such that we are almost completely debt free - aside from our mortgage and vehicle loans. We are completely caught up with our electric, heat, phone, EVERYTHING!!!  Praise to God Almighty! Our Lord is faithful and true! And He has delivered us from our financial problems!

THEN we went to Denver yesterday for my orthodontist appointment and unbeknownst to me I got my braces off!! YIPEE!! (Immediately after leaving my appt I ate a SNICKERS  - my ALL TIME favorite candy bar and something I have not had for an excruciatingly long 2 YEARS!! It was sooooo good!! LOL!!!

After I got them off they called me into the manager's office.  And I knew they were going to talk to us about the account - we owe $1300 and haven't been able to pay for 6 months - they had been really understanding due to our situation but still - and I just didn't know what to tell them about how we would pay it back - we had NO way to do it.  The manager told me congrats on getting my braces off, handed me a huge balloon and an even bigger bag of candy - Twizzlers, Starburst, jelly beans, taffy, and more - all the candy I couldn't eat for 2 years! -and then said she wanted to talk to us about our account balance.  She said that they are considering our account paid in full!!! They wiped our debt completely out! Praise God!!! I just burst into tears and hubby and I praised God right there and then.

THEN as if that wasn't enough - the propane company came and filled our tank! Even though they said they weren't going to fill it until we paid the account current and were keeping to that - they hadn't filled since the beginning of January - they didn't fill in Feb at all. We were down to bare minimum in our tank. Then out of the blue they just showed up and filled it!

All this was yesterday. Our Lord is incredible! Praise HIM!! And we weren't the only ones He worked a miracle on yesterday.  A friend of mine who owed thousands of dollars on her property and was about to have it taken away when the Lord intervened and told them that the man who was taking the land away would accept a lower amount and where to get the money to pay him. They got the money and gave it to the man and he accepted it as payment and re-wrote their contract.

Thank you so much for the numerous prayers and words of encouragement and everything esle! I know that I would not have gotten it through all this without all of your love and support!  May God bless you and yours richly!

Love

YSIC

Missy

I was put on synthroid when first diagnosed with it almost a year ago - I had insurance then. But my meds ran out about 2 months ago and I can't get in to see an endo at all now to have it refilled. My pain management doc is trying to find me some help with that so I can get in to be seen.

I have to go up to Denver tomorrow (today I should say since it's after midnight) for my orthodontics appt (I've had braces for 2 years due to major jaw problems - it was either get braces or get my jaw broken...hmmm easy choice lol) and I haven't been for several months because of our finances. It's a 2 hour drive up there from here and I'm not looking forward to the drive. Rick's truck is not the most comfortable - it can only seat 2 adults and 1 child - so I know I will need to bring my cane with so I can walk once we get out. I would change to a local ortho but I will end up having to pay more than I already have and I have no insurance to cover it.

Boy I can't WAIT til I can get on Medicare - you have to be on SSDI for 2 years before you can get on it - I only have til November 7! Hopefully we will be outta here by then tho!

My mom had symptoms of what you describe traveller many years ago. They called it something else though - can't remember what. That's great you can ride your motorcycle though!

Well, docs say I don't have arthritis - tests and xrays are neg for that. But I have pain in my joints nonetheless. I get so confused by the doctors! I just wish they would tell me one way or another what the heck is wrong with me!

The only thing that has come up positive is I have 4 bulging discs in my lower back but they aren't so bad as to be causing all the pain from my hips down. I do have a very sore lower back and have to sleep propped up for the most part with pillows under my knees. This is hard for someone who used to be a tummy sleeper!

Oh and the other things that have come up in labs is my thyroid levels were extremely low and so was my estrogen. I'm supposed to be on meds for those but I can't get in to see an endocrinologist.

Cat I know how you feel! Sometimes I feel so inadequate! Esp on days like yesterday when my daughter was doing the laundry and scrubbing floors and my younger son was cleaning the bathroom and changing the cat box. These are all things that I should be able to do and honestly truly don't mind doing them. But I can't. And my kids and husband have to pick up the slack. I just sit back and feel awful!

I have those days where I ask, WHY?? Why is this person who used to be so extremely active unable to even get dressed some days or get to the bathroom without help some days? And I cry and cry and cry.

I feel esp bad in regards to our financial situation - if only I could WORK we wouldn't be where we are! We lost $35,000 a year when I had to quit. That hurts!

I am 34 - look 25 - feel 90. I can't walk the grocery store - I have to use one of those rider cart thingies.

My hubby is great too - he is so patient and giving and caring. He rubs my legs when they get so painful I cry. He takes me to the bathroom when I can't get there myself. He dresses me when I can't do it myself. He has helped me shower too. He brushes my hair when I can't lift my arms past my chest. I am so blessed to have him in my life. He is wonderful.

I do have fun doing things that aren't physical. We play board games and cards and stuff. And on days when I feel pretty good we take walks - short ones - or go into town visiting.

I am having a horrible day today. Very sore, exhausted, stressed, and migraines.

What a perfect day for the rapture!

I have 2 dogs (just recently had to put our other 2 dogs down), 1 cat, 2 birds, 2 fish and 7 guinea pigs.

We are going to be giving the guinea pigs away though soon. We are trying to cut expenses and plus we may be moving soon and won't be able to take them with.

While I have never witnessed true healing myself, I have heard of healings from others and I believe they were true healings.

I have a hard time believing those televangelists on tv with their yelling be healed and pushing people over and then all of a sudden someone who has supposedly never walked a day in his life get up and walk. Something about that just doesn't fly right with me.

I do believe the Lord heals today. And boy would I love to be healed right this minute! To be able to run and take long walks and do all those things I LOVE doing again! What joy! Heaven on earth I tell you!

But if it's not His will that I be healed here on earth - I will be healed in the world to come because we are promised not only incorruptible bodies BUT no more pain, sorrow or tears.

Praise to you Lord Jesus!

I have two tattoos - one on my left hip of a rose with the stem peircing a heart and the other is a small star on my right wrist. I got them before I became a believer.

The star was when I was 16 and quite stoned out of my mind - it was hand-done with a needle and a bottle of india ink by my boyfriend who was equally stoned. Didn't feel a thing and thought it was hilarious.

The rose and heart was done summer of 97 - I was 29. It hurt like heck.

I don't really regret getting either one. I love the tattoo on my hip - it's beautiful. The only person that sees it is my husband - except for in the summer when I wear my bathing suit.  The star tattoo looks like a mole unless you look at it real close.  And although I would love to get a cross or a crown of thorns band around my arm, I won't because I believe the Lord would not approve. I have asked for His forgivness for getting them - as I did not know at the time I got them nor was I a believer at the time.  If I had known or been a believer I would not have gotten them.

Oh I hate those ones too. Why do I need to send them to everyone to prove my love? He knows my heart and sending those things on don't prove a thing!

Another pet peeve - when my mother has a fit and tells me that there must be something wrong - like I am mad at her - if I don't email her every day. She will send me an email and I won't respond immediately (sometimes I don't go online every day for various reasons - don't feel like it, too tired, don't feel good, not home, etc) and she will send me emails saying things like don't you love me anymore, why are you mad at me something is very wrong and on and on and on.....

 :???:

Yes we are so blessed!

Rick stayed home with me on Tues and Wednesday because of a flareup. He took wonderful care of me and laid in bed with me both days and held me while I slept. sigh  :inlove:

He is such a wonderful Daddy to our "babies". Alright they aren't babies anymore but they are still my babies!

My husband works but hardly makes a thing. My SSDI, his income and the SSDI my kids get (because I am on SSDI they get benefits too) is not enough to make ends meet.

We struggle financially big time. We almost lost our home earlier this year, but by the grace of God we were able to get 2 loans to pay the payments we were behind. Now we are just trying to figure out how we can afford to pay those payments.

Right now, I am running out of propane (this is what heats our home and hot water) and the propane company won't fill our tank until we pay what we owe on it ($255). Which I have no idea when that will be.  We are just barely able to keep our electricity and phone on by pay just enough to keep it from getting disconnected.

We don't qualify for any assistance of any kind - food stamps, medical assistance, general assistance, energy assistance - nothing - because our income is just over the limit. We have tried everything. I cannot qualify for Medicaid/Medicare until I have been on SSDI for 2 years - that won't be until November.

I am homebound and the internet is my lifeline to the outside world.  We live 40 miles outside of town and I am unable to drive so I have to wait for my husband to drive me into town - sometimes I don't get into town for 2 or 3 weeks. Without my online service I would feel even more cut off from the outside world than I already do.  

My husband was laid off for almost 6 months last year and we hardly got any unemployment during that time. We are really suffering the effects of that layoff, plus I have not been getting my long term disability from my former employer like I am supposed to be getting - long story but the gist of it is they messed up and now I am suffering for it - for over a year now.

We have had to rely on the charity of others the last few months for groceries. I am grateful that the Lord has seen fit to send those wonderful people into our lives, that we have been able to get food.

We have doctor bills out the ying yang because we have no medical insurance and I cannot go without my medication. I am on a narcotic for pain management.

The only blessing that has come out of this illness of mine is that I have been able to be home with my children.  The rest has been a curse. We suffer financially, emotionally and physically.  I have feelings of guilt - because my husband cannot enjoy the things he once used to do - hunting trips, archery competition, fishing trips, etc. - because we can't afford them and he can't leave me for more than a regular work day in case something happens to me. Because I cannot do the things I used to be able to do with my family - camping, hiking, fishing, bicycling, rollerblading. Guilt that I can't participate with my kids in some of their activities. Guilt that if it wasn't for me our financial situation would be much different and we wouldn't be struggling desperately. I was bringing home good money with my job - which I also loved.  :inlove: But now....

Gosh!  I feel like all I am doing is griping in this thread! ??? I guess I am just getting my feelings of inadequacy out - boy do I ever feel inadequate!

I want ya'll to know that you are all in my prayers and that I am feeling very blessed to know you and that it does feel good to know that I am really not alone at all in how I am feeling.

What a great story! God brought you 2 together for a reason. I think it's wonderful how he took your son as his own - there aren't too many guys out there that will even date a woman with a child, much less adopt the kids.

Rick and I fell in love instantly - 9 days after we met we said I love you for the first time and started talking about getting married.  He fell in love with my kids from day one as well and they with him - they started calling him Daddy within a month of us meeting and shortly after that refused to be called by their legal last name at that time and wrote his last name as theirs on their school work etc.  He adopted the kids as soon as he could - April 3rd will be the 3rd anniversary of the adoption.  We celebrate it every year as a "birthday" for the kids and we have a great time. We give them presents and have a cake and everything.

I also look like I am normal. Before I went on short term disabilty, then long term disability, and was trying to work, I used to hear "but you look so good" quite often.  It was hard. Some people thought I was just trying to shirk my duties.

Going on disability isn't really based on how you look - except if you are in pain, have a hard time walking, etc. It's based on what your doctor's say - are you able to function basically.  I was pretty blessed - I had a doctor that took excellent notes on my appts and wrote how debilitated I was - what I could and couldn't do, pain levels, how I walked, talked, my symptoms, every medication I had been on what worked what didn't - that kind of stuff. Have your doctor write very detailed notes. Keep track of your pain levels yourself - how each day is - what you can or can't do - in a journal. Keep track of dates of dr. appts, etc.

If you get approved you will get back pay all the way to the date that you became disabled - minus 9 months. So if you were first diagnosed with your disability in 1995 in Feb - your SSDI would start December of 1995.  Of course, your amount of benefit depends on how long you have worked - how much SS you have put in yourself, they take into consideration how long you've been married - if you've been married before and for how long.

They also take what your profession is - how long you have done it, whether or not you have other skills, what your duties were, what other jobs you have had and what your duties were - they go back 15 years in your job history. So you would need dates of employment, who you worked for and what your duties were for every job you have had for the last 15 years. Also if you have gone to school for a skill - vocational or college - if you have a degree etc.  They look at if you can be trained to do other jobs and if you would be able to do those jobs based on your abilities with your disability.

They also look at what you can do for yourself - dressing, and other self-hygenic things. Can you cook, clean, take care of your kids, pets, every day things around the house. How much do you sleep, can you handle stress, can you exercise, can you participate in the recreational things you used to - biking, hiking, swimming, arts and crafts or whatever it was. How has your personal life been affected - do you participate with friends and family like before - stuff like that.

My case was that I had been in the secretarial field since I was 16. I went to school for it - computers, word processing, paralegal type classses and it was all I had done except for a paper route when I was 15 and fast food restaurants when I was a teen as well. So if I couldn't sit at a computer and type or stand and file or sit and answer the phone, what other kind of job could I do? nothing. I can't sit or stand for more than 10 mins without pain. Can't squat or lift things without pain. Not to mention how exhausted I get doing the most basic things.

Getting my disability approved was very easy - easier than I expected.  The doctors I saw all sent in their notes from my appts, my lab results, xrays, MRIs etc. Both my disability insurance company and Social Security approved my claims.  My SSDI needs to be reviewed every 3 years - my long term disability (when I was got my last job I had signed up for long term and short term disability coverage - never had I done that before but I felt a pull to do it - a year later I became disabled - I know now it was the Lord leading me to do it even though I wasn't saved when I started that job) through my ex-employer, needs to be reviewed every year.

My LTD is being reviewed for this year right now and my pain specialist has been dragging his feet since November and hasn't sent in the required paperwork. My LTD company has requested the info 3 times from him and if they don't receive the info by March 15 my claim might be denied. Jerk.  I see him on Tuesday to have my pain meds refilled and I am going to let him have it. I really hate doctors sometimes!

kfender - thanks for sharing that with us. I understand about so wanting to be normal again.

Cat that is great that the arthritis is just in your larger joints! It is hard to have your mind feel that you are fine and want to do things but your body says no way!

I wish my doctors could be so sure what I have like Cat! They tell me though that because I have tested negative than it can't be Lupus. Since the first doctor I saw that actually did some tests on me - I have had several tell me it was all in my head - told me that it sounded like Lupus, I have not been able to shake that. Not even when the blood work came back negative.  

I just wish I could have a definitive diagnosis and know for sure what it is that is wrong with me. I know I have something more than just fibro/chronic fatigue. It's a gut feeling that hasn't gone away since I realized that it wasn't the flu or just being worn down that I had.  My mom has fibro and she is much more active and able to do things than I am.  

I just want to know for sure. I'm tired of trying to explain to people why I am so tired, why I can't find the words to speak sometimes and sound like a babbling idiot, why I can't do something as easy as loading the dishwasher some days.

If someone could just tell me - YES this is what you have! I could deal with ANYTHING. Yes ANYTHING. It's the not knowing for sure that drives me up the wall.

I, too wish I was normal. That I could do the things I used to be able to.  What hurts the most is when my kids say, "Momma I wish you could play with us like you used to."  I used to go rollerblading with them, bike riding, play football, wrestle, run around with them. I've always been such a physically active person - a major tomboy.

My mind isn't what it used to be either. I could figure out anything lickitty split all on my own. Now there are times when I have to have something explained to me numerous times before I understand.  I do try to keep my brain sharp as best I can by doing brain teasers and trying to memorize bible verses. Sometimes I do good - others not.

I love when I have "remission" times. When I can cook dinner, make my bed, walk without the use of my cane - I LOVE THAT - tickle my kids, play with the dog, do a load of laundry - boy I never thought I would be glad to do that! - and almost be normal again. I almost start to feel like maybe I am getting better - that my disease is fading away. I thank the Lord for those times when I can feel almost normal again.  I praise Him for allowing me to taste my former self and that things aren't worse than what they are - that I am not confined to a wheelchair, that I can do the things I CAN do.

But then the flareups come back and sometimes they are worse than before and last longer than ever.  Those are the times when I am walking with my cane constantly, when I need help showering, getting dressed or getting to the bathroom.

There have been times when it is so bad - the pain, the swelling - there was a period of about 8 months when all I could where was a ratty old pair of moccasins because my feet were swollen 3 times their size - the tiredness, that depression set in worse than ever and I beg the Lord to take me. I would rather be dead than live like that.

I am grateful about this illness for a couple reasons. One, it has opened my eyes to the blessings in my life that I took for granted before. Another, it has allowed me to be a stay at home mom and spend more time with my kids and husband. It has allowed me to be the kind of wife and mother I wanted to be - making breakfast for my husband and kids (on my good days) seeing them off to school/work, being here when they come home, being more involved with the kids' lives.

Some day we will all have new glorified immortal bodies.  There are times when I cling so desperately to that promise.  And I can't wait for that glorious day! To be able to look upon our Father's beautiful face, sing praises to Him right there and receive our new body. Oh Lord! I pray for that day to come soon!

Thank you Kiwi.

I guess I can start this discussion -

I have been on disability - one form or another - since May 2, 2001, although my symptoms and pain started in Sept, 2000.

The doctors (I have seen over 12) say that I have all the signs of Lupus except for the rash, except blood tests for it come up negative. I have had people tell me that I do have it - those who have it themselves. But the docs pretty much say that I have chronic pain, chronic fatigue and fibromyalgia.

LOL Cat! I don't like shopping either unless it's to actually go get something in particular - school clothes, shoes, groceries, etc. I don't like "window shopping". What's the point? So I can get depressed over the things that I wish I could have but don't? I don't think so!

There isn't too many things that Rick and I do separately from each other.  We both love fishing, camping, hiking, archery, working out on the property, etc etc.  I like going to Home Depot, however, just to get ideas on decorating the rest of the house.