For an atheist, there is no God. They believe God is “real” like how Zeus, Hermes, and Poseidon are real. In their minds, the Judeo-Christian deity is but one of countless gods invented by humans. I, a Christian, object to the atheist worldview because I’ve had many experiences where I’ve personally witnessed the undeniable power of the Holy Spirit working miracles in my life. Unfortunately, I’ve been feeling like an atheist recently (meaning it feels to me like God doesn’t exist, though I know in my heart of hearts that he does). Why is this the case? Because it feels like God has abandoned me, and he won’t speak to me, either.
For years I have been experiencing a horrible ordeal day after day, night after night. Demons continually assault me and make my life a living hell. They are real, not hallucinations. God told me he would get rid of them if I live a day without sinning. When that happens, God removes the demons, but it’s only temporary: the demons return shortly later, then I have to continue walking on eggshells the following day and be on my utter best behavior to have a chance at God removing the tormenting demons—and it never ends.
Not sinning is very difficult, so it’s rare that the demons get removed for a short period of time. Recently, though, I’ve been doing very good and not sinning at all. In fact, I’ve been going through many days of not sinning once.
But here is the sad part.
God is no longer removing the demons. He leaves me to suffer, and I don’t know why. God will not communicate with me and tell me what sins I am committing that are making him so angry that he will let me suffer with demons. God has been utterly silent on the matter, and I’m very distressed. I am entitled for God to remove the demons because I met his requirements by not sinning, but God isn’t removing them, nor will he even talk with me just one little tiny bit.
Please everyone pray for me and ask God to either remove the demons or tell me what sort of sin I am committing that is making God hold a horrible grudge against me and allow me to suffer horribly with monstrous demons.