TreyM

Part 1 Our worlds of Christianity and sexuality are commonly viewed as being miles apart. Someone once said, "Christian sex" is an oxymoron. We don't talk about sex or preach about sex unless it's a sermon that deals with "the sinfulness of sex" outside of marriage. When was the last time you heard a sermon preached on the positive side of sex or a sermon from the Song of Solomon. I'm not saying we need to be discussing sex openly, but we've got to understand that God created sex. Why not at least tell people what He has to say about it from a biblical perspective? Believe it or not, God created sex as something good, and the bible actually has a lot to say on the subject. You may think, with all the warning about not having sex before marriage, that sex is bad. The Bible says something quite contrary to that. Sex is biblical, if looked at from a Godly perspective. Here's what I see the Bible saying about Sex... 1. Sex is a Good Thing. Sex was created by God as something good. He gave a husband and a wife this gift as a way for them to express their love for one another. God did create sex to be a beautiful and enjoyable expressions of love, but only between a man and wife (Genesis 2:24; Proverbs 5:18-19; Song of Songs 7:6-7; 1 Corinthians 6:13). God also created sex as a way for a husband and wife to have children or as the bible says, "be fruitful and increase in number" (Genesis 1:27-28). 2. Sex was Created for a Husband and a Wife. Sex is in just about every movie, book, television show and song on the radio. Our world has become lax about sex, making it seem like sex is okay with anyone because it feels good, but the Bible does not agree. God created sex for the confines of marriage only, and He calls us to control our passions and wait for marriage (1 Corinthians 7:2-3; Hebrews 13:4; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4). 3. God wants each Person in the Marriage to Conscientiously fulfill their mate's sexual needs and desires. Strong sexual needs exist in both husband and wife. Sex in marriage is wonderful! But like all blessings, there can be an accompanying curse. Unfulfilled sexual needs sometimes lead to illicit relationships. God addressed this strong sexual desire and need in humans through the writings of Paul in 1 Corinthians 7:2-5. "But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." If you're interested in more information or helpful links, feel free to visit my blog. Blessings, Trey

Nine out of ten affairs begin with an emotional attraction. It usually happens when a need that a spouse is not meeting begins to be met by another person of the opposite sex. It may be far easier to have an emotional affair than you may realize. When you find yourself connecting with another person of the opposite sex as a substitute, you've started traveling a road that too often ends in adultery and divorce. When these things are taking place, with someone of the opposite sex, it should be a huge warning ... * You begin to talk about problems you are having with your spouse. * You find it easier to unwind with someone other than your spouse over lunch, coffee or a ride home. * You're dishonest with your spouse about things dealing with a person of the opposite sex. * You've got a need you feel your mate isn't meeting (attention, approval, affection, etc), and someone else begins to fill that need. * You rationalize that this new relationship with someone of the opposite sex is okay, because they are a Christian and they are helping you through a difficult time. * You look forward to being with this person more than with your own mate. * You hide your friendship from your mate. So, how do you keep this from happening? Because of length of this post, the rest of the information is on my blog this morning. I hope you'll swing by. Blessings, Trey

I don't know how many times I've heard women say, "My husband just can't communicate." I don't know how many times I've heard men say, "I just can't get a straight answer from my wife." There is no arguing that men and women communicate differently. God wired-up men and women very differently. While women focus on talking, men often focus on fixing things or finding solutions. Communication is one of the glues of marriage and other relationships as well. There is no telling how many marriages have been killed by ineffective communication? The bible teaches and life verifies that good communication is not automatic. It must be learned and developed. Here are some tips for good communication... DON'T SEND MIXED MESSAGES: Don't say one thing and then act another. You can't expect your spouse to read your mind. Like the man who asked his wife who'd been giving him the silent treatment, "Are you mad at me?" "I'm not mad," she replied. "Are you sure nothing is wrong?" he asked. "Nothing IS WRONG," she said. So he tries one last time and says, "I can tell something is wrong." To which she replies, "WE'LL, IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS, I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU." Mixed messages and the silent treatment won't accomplish anything but problems. TIMING: Timing is essential for the stand up comedian, the suspense novelist and even in our marriages and families. It's probably best not to meet the tired spouse who's been working all day, at the door at the end of their day to say, "We've got problems." When someone is engrossed in something or walking out the door are not times to say, "Let's talk." There's an old Chinese proverb that says, "Bad timing equals fireworks." (Ecclesiastes 3:1,7). PLAN: Plan your words before you say them. Solomon said in Proverbs 16:23, "Intelligent people think before they speak." That means you don't shoot from the hip, and you don't sling your words around carelessly. Planning your words means never using derogatory words like dumb, stupid, idiot and other words that tear down. FOCUS: If you focus on your spouse's needs (or children's needs), they will listen. You don't want to communicate to someone but with someone. (Ephesians 4:29, 5:28-29) LISTEN: We like talking much more than listening, but a good communicator will seek to understand then to be understood. Don't be like the jerk I know that recently said this about his wife, "If I want my wife's opinion, I'll give it to her." Be a good listener. You listen with your eyes when you make eye contact. You listen with your body by focusing on what's being said. "He who answers before listening - this is his folly and shame" Proverbs 18:13. ENCOURAGE: Speak positively not abrasively. Any fool can be a critic. Labeling, negativity, nagging and sarcasms don't work and aren't healthy communication. Try and finish all communication by building up, not tearing down. (Proverbs 16:21-24, Ephesians 4:26). REAFFIRM: Following any discussion that gets heated or when you disagree with one another, it's always good to reaffirm your commitment to one another and reaffirm your love for one another. So, two questions for you today... What do you see is the biggest problem in communication between men and women? The "inability to communicate" is one of the top 5 reasons for divorce in our nation. Here's a list of the top 5 reasons for divorce today (unranked): Money, Sexual Problems, Communication, A Cheating Spouse, Children & In-laws. Rank these in the order you think they fall from #1 to #5. If you'd like to know more ... stop by my blog today for more information: (treymorgan.net)

Our hearts are saddened at this time over the events that have taken place at Virginia Tech. 33 people have been killed and many others injured in senseless, godless, evil and cowardly act violence that took place at VT. Please, please remember to pray tonight for the victims, their families and our country. I'd also like to share a few thought on this subject of "Why would God allow this to happen?" I'm not sure that anyone will ever be able to answer that question. It's been a question that has been asked since the beginning of the world. I'm not sure that I have an answer today, but I have given it a lot of thought. I know God has given people a free moral choice and that is the choice to to good and bad. Sadly may choose to do evil and violent things that effect others as it did yesterday. I'd like to share with you three thoughts to the question, "If God is great and God is good, why do the innocent suffer?" 1 - First thought: That is a fair question. It

I want to be a part of a healthy church not an unhealthy one. God wants me to be a part of a healthy church. So, what are some of the characteristics of the healthy churches? I know there are many, but here are at least 10 traits of a healthy church. 1) Healthy churches talk about Jesus all the time. Their main focus isn't their building, their budget or their bottom line, it's Jesus. They don't have gimmicks, they have Jesus. He's at the center of everything they do and teach. 2) Healthy churches communicate clearly. The key to success in real estate is location, location, location. The key to success in most all the areas of the church is communication, communication, communication. Use bulletins, newsletters, handouts, email and websites to communicate. You cannot over communicate your visions, goals and plans. 3) Healthy churches involve people. Healthy churches don't have 10% of the people doing 90% of the work. You've got to incorporate and involve people. Let them know they are needed. 4) Healthy churches use the Bible. It's the best book ever. It's full of answers for people's lives. To use something other than the bible is stupid. Don't tell me that if you teach from the bible, people won't come - nothing is further from the truth. 5) Healthy churches put a BIG focus on children. Children are the future. You cannot put to much emphasis on the youth and children. VBS, bible classes, youth functions and youth ministers are all valuable assets in reaching, teaching and raising youth. 6 - 10 are on my blog this morning if you'd like to swing by and see the final 5 traits of a healthy church. Blessings, Trey

A month ago I posted a list called "Top 10 Ways to get your Preacher to Quit." It may have been my most popular post. I thought I'd follow up on that list with today's Top 10 list on how to encourage you preacher. 1- Pray for him regularly. This may be the greatest thing you can do for him. Include him in your daily prayers, and then, tell him you're praying for him. You might even ask him occasionally, "Is there anything I can be praying about for you?" 2 - Instead of being critical, tell him what he's doing right. Too many times we focus on the things that we don't like about people instead of what they are doing right. Instead of saying the sermons are too long, to deep, to simple, to short (like that would ever happen), tell him what you like about his sermons. Instead of pointing out the negatives in his life, look for some positive things. Make sure you tell him regularly what he's doing right. 3 - Give him time off and allow him a life outside the church. Ministers are on call 24/7 and so it's good when they can have some "down time." Here are some ways you can do this... Encourage your preacher to take time off to vacation with his family or just get away. Another thing you can do is respect your preacher's day off. Any preacher would drop what they are doing to help you in a crisis on their day off, but don't call him on his day off to have him look up a church phone number or address for you. 4 - Be willing to work with your preacher. Don't expect him to do everything. Ask him if you can go make visits with him or volunteer to help when needed. Nothing is more frustrating to a preacher than having to beg for help. 5 - Don't starve your preacher but pay him a fair salary. There used to be an old joke about how churches would pray for their preachers, "Lord, if you'll keep him humble, we'll keep him poor." It's appalling that there are churches that assume that the preacher is in a "spiritual" vocation, and doesn't need to be paid as much as similar people in the community. That's 5 of the 10. If you want to drop by and read the rest (6-10) you can tell me what I forgot or left off. Here's the others (click here) or check the signature: Blessings,

Growing up my brother Bruce and I watched a lot of baseball. The Atlanta Braves were the team we watched because they were the only ones on television. Guys like Dale Murphey, Bob Horner and Ray Hubbard were just a few of the guys we pulled for. Today it doesn't matter who the teams are, the sounds of baseball get my blood pumping. The game of baseball shows the human predicament of trying to measure up to a perfect standard. Baseball is a game of numbers against impossible standards. Everything a baseball players does is added up and written down on paper. For example, a player's "batting average" (BA) tell us how a player is batting, and it's carried out to 3 decimal points. No one says, "He bats well." They say, "he's batting .265" or "he's batting .301." They are very precise numbers, and there's no way to pretend to be successful or hide failure. Funny thing about baseball is no one really does all that well. The very best hitters get about 3 hits every 10 tries (meaning he bats .300). That's not very good for our present jobs, but if you can get 3 hits out of 10 in baseball, they'll pay you a million dollars to play. Great baseball players like Mickey Mantle could hit towering home runs from both sides of the plate, but he also struck out 1710 times. You see, no one is very good when measured against the perfect standard of batting 1000. Certainly life is like that mixed with a lot of hits, strike outs and errors. Much like baseball, the old law measures you against impossible standards. Under the old law you had to bat 1000. You had to be perfect. 3 out of 10 (.300) would still be .700 short. Thankfully under God's new law, we're taught these two things about God's Grace... 1 - Grace means God will more than fill the gaps in your batting average. It means when you are batting .200 God will hit .1000 or more to cover your gap. Grace means you don't have to bat 1000, because only God bats 1000 and through Christ, God covers your short falls (2 Corinthians 5:21). 2 - Grace means you always get a second chance. Just like a batter who makes an error and gets a 2nd chance the next inning, God is the God of the second chance. God even established His church for people who've made lots of errors (like me). Jesus spent most of his time with people who made lots of errors. People who had gone 0-4 in life. People who had dropped the ball of life. Losers in life like fishermen, prostitutes, tax collectors, poor, diseased, out cast and the lost. But Jesus came to seek and save the lost and he established his church for error prone people like me (Romans 8:1-2). Grace means that in Christ, the score keeper cancels all your errors. Opening day of baseball is today and I'm ready to see them throw out the first pitch. There will be a lot of people strike out on opening day. By the end of the month no one will be batting a 1000. And in life ... no one will be batting 1000 either. Thank GOD for grace. Oh, and "Happy Opening Day" today! ---------------------------- As you know, I love "Top 10 Lists." Tomorrow being "Top 10 Tuesday," I'll give a part two to, "10 Ways to Get Your Preacher to Quit." This time I'll go from the other side, "Top 10 Ways to Keep A Preacher." I hope you'll stop by. Blessings, Trey www.treymorgan.net

It's "Top 10 Tuesday" - So with apologies to Jeff Foxworthy (You might be a Redneck) here are 10 Signs You Might Be a Pharisee... 1. If you consider the church roll the Lambs book of Life. 2. If you're disgusted by the moral filth that is playing out of your own VCR/DVD player. 3. If you think Christianity is about rules rather than relationship. 4. If you think any church that has experienced growth must be watering down the Gospel. 5. If you rebuke the visiting preacher for not wearing a tie when he was in the pulpit. 6. If you won't let your kids watch "The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe" because there's a witch in the movie. 7 - 10 are still on my blog if you want to stop by and read the rest. Also, can you think of any I left out? Blessings, Trey

I believe with all my heart that God wants us to have a happy marriage. I've listed "21 Tips for a Happy Marriage" on my blog today. Here are the first 12 ... 1. Know how to make your spouse laugh 2. Communicate to your spouse what romantic is to you 3. Look into your spouse's eyes while listening 4. Give at least one compliment a day 5. Make every anniversary a special celebration 6. Be willing and able to say "I'm sorry" 7. Never get to old to hold hands 8. Know the importance of courtship after marriage 9. Unexpected gifts can bring great pleasure 10. Communicate, don't demand, your sexual needs 11. Know how to appreciate and accept the differences in your spouse 12. Know how to agree more and argue less I've left the rest on my blog if you want to take a look. And make sure you tell me if I'm missed any ... Blessings ... Trey

It's Top 10 Tuesday ... Here are 7 of my Top 10 "Ways to get a New Visitor to your church to NEVER come back." 1. Tell them that they are in your pew. How dare they ... it is your pew! 2. Tell them there is a dress code, that they need a tie, need to wear pants, need to take off their cap or need to dress up more. 3. Let them hear you gripe about everything from the sermon, to the song leader, to the song selection. 4. Don't ask them if there is any thing they need or if there is anything you can pray about for them. 5. Have the preacher not be prepared. 6. Sing only old slow songs and do it with no life, feeling, heart or meaning. You know like, "Tis so sweet to rust in Jesus." 7. Have the preacher preach about why everyone else is going to hell. And have him name names if he can. Swing by and catch the rest of the list on my blog today ... Blessings, Trey PS - Did I miss any?

Sexual misconduct. One of the most devastating thing that can happen to a church is for one of its leaders (minister, youth minister, elder, pastor) to get caught in a sexual relationship outside his marriage. When this does take place churches feel betrayed, victims/survivors are often misunderstood and the families of all involved suffer greatly. No one likes to talk about it, but it needs to be addressed. If you think it couldn't happen in your church, ask the congregation at Westminster Presbyterian in Minneapolis. Their senior and associate ministers both had sexual affairs. Both were married. Sooner or later every church may have to deal with someone in leadership who falls into sin and has an extramarital affair. Who gets hurt when this happens? * God * The person the minister is involved with * The minister * The families of both parties * The minister's wife * The other person's spouse * The minister's children * The other person's children * The church * Our testimony & witness for Christ * Our faith & trust So What are the Issues to we Have to Deal With? What Is the Church to do? What's the Preacher/ Pastor/ Leader to do? The rest of my post is on my blog this morning. I hope you'll swing by and tell me if you agree or not here on Worthy Boards. (click above of see signature) Blessings

"As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his father had been." ~ 1 Kings 11:4 That verse hit me like a ton of bricks as I was reading the other day. I'd seen it before, but never in the way I had seen it that day. It's as if God had opened my eyes to something that had been previously hidden from me. I've always known that "it was all about the heart" when it came to God. David was a man after God's own heart, and at one time, Solomon was too. But as Solomon grew older the Bible says, "His wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was no longer fully devoted to God." This tells me 3 things about what kind of heart God wants.... I've included all 3 things on my blog. Stop by and take a look and see if I've missed any. Blessings, Trey

Have you ever felt like your prayers weren't working or that God wasn't listening? This week while reading, I ran across some verses in the book of James that talked about the things that hinder or stop my prayers. That kind of scares me, because I don't want anything stopping my prayers. So I thought I'd share with you a few of the things that might be unplugging our prayer life. As a Christian I need to be plugged in to the power source... prayer ... and God. I've included 6 things that hold back our prayers on my blog today. Stop by and see if you agree of if I've forgotten any... Blessings, (Click Here for the Link) Or see my signature...

Have you ever wondered why some ministers move an average of every two years? Or why are more ministers getting out of full-time ministry than there are getting in to it? I've got a few ideas that might help answer those questions. I've included on my blog this morning, 10 things you could be doing that might make your minister want to quit. I've come up with 10, can you think of any more? Blessings, Trey http://rediscovering-church.blogspot.com/2...reacher-to.html (Click above or see my signature for blog address)

We all have questions. Sometimes are questions need to be directed more to ourselves than others. As a Christian I've asked myself 12 tough questions this morning on my blog. Here are the first 5. They are the easier ones. Stop by if you want to check them all out... Blessings - Trey (click above or see signature for blog address) Why do we think we know who God gives His grace and mercy to? Why do we sing if it's not coming from the heart? Why do we talk about holiness and purity, and then welcome the filth and immorality into our home through the television? Why do we expect more from others than we do ourselves? Why are we not reading our Bible regularly if it's so important to us?