refugepsa91 Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted September 5, 2004 I need advice on how to let go of a deep hate...a resentment and anger so bad it acutally effects my whole life...I am even having a hard time praying over it right now... The problem I am having is complicated...but to make a long story short...my dad wanted to go off oxicotin...so he stopped taking it...cold turkey...it had been almost 48 hours and he was still vomiting so I took him to the emergency room. The hospital messed up bad...the meds they gave him created a terrible reaction...they knew it...they were told what to do over the phone by our family physician (we only found this out later) and they totally ignored it. They shut the door and walked out and left me with my dad alone going through the most horrible seizure like attacks...I was so scared...a intern would walk in and I would start to ask questions...now folks I never once got an answer, these people would actually just look at me raise their eyebrows and shrug their shoulders slightly. I am crying and begging for help because I was having a hard time controlling my dad. This hospital actually tried to check him out into my care while he was in this condition...because they weren't equipped to deal with this kind of situation...of course I refused...in dads condition he would have grabbed my wheel or jumped out of the van for sure. We ended up having to take him to a lansing hospital later the next day....he has permanent damage now...he has lost some of his memories...he can't keep a straight thought for long...our dr. is pretty sure he had a stroke due to his violent reaction to the drug they gave him...the drug wasn't even for nausea which is why we took him in in the first place... There is sooooo much more to it than this...but it would take a book to relay what my family has been through...in this last couple of weeks. A deep hate is festering in me and I know it is wrong...but I am so bitter over what happened to my dad...the thought that he will never be the same is heartbreaking to me...and I thank God he lived I honestly do. I am having trouble now wanting some peoples head on a platter...I want them to be disciplined. I need to let this go but I don't know how.... Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest yod Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 one word; Malpractisesuityouaregoingtoownthathospitalbeforeitsover. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trinity Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 92 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,244 Content Per Day: 0.31 Reputation: 63 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/30/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted September 5, 2004 Go up to them and say to them "I forgive you" it might help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Author Share Posted September 5, 2004 Go up to them and say to them "I forgive you" it might help I could go up to them and say that...but I would not truly mean it...I don't even know if I could choke those words out right now. Yod....yes we are contacting an attorney...we have no choice...the hospital we ended up taking him too in Lansing didn't accept my moms insurance...so we are going to make them pay for it if possible. And any other medical problem after this he may suffer. My dad cries now...I have never seen him cry....its breaking me apart...and just makes me want to actually physically hurt these people in that emergency room that dealt with him. I just don't want to be eaten up by this terrible emotion. Maybe time will make it better. Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest yod Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 you are very justifiably angry. There is a difference between wanting justice and hatred. I hope you get justice....because you will save a lot of people if you do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trinity Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 92 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,244 Content Per Day: 0.31 Reputation: 63 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/30/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted September 5, 2004 The only way you can get rid of that feeling is if you forgive them... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Author Share Posted September 5, 2004 Arghhhh....I know you are right Trinity...I honestly do...and I will most definately try to forgive them...it may take time though. Yod...Justice is a better way to look at it...right now in my anger I see it more as revenge, which isn't very wise I know. But we can't let this go...all I want is my dad back the way he was...but so far it doesn't look like thats gonna happen. Bad thing is my language goes in the gutter over this....I'm not a curser...really I'm not...but this seems to bring it out in me...and I have got to get a grip. I have never called somone what I called those interns on duty that day. Maybe I am feeling ashamed too because of the way I handled and am at this time handeling this. Love does hurt doesn't it? Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trinity Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 92 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,244 Content Per Day: 0.31 Reputation: 63 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/30/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted September 5, 2004 Arghhhh....I know you are right Trinity...I honestly do...and I will most definately try to forgive them...it may take time though. Yod...Justice is a better way to look at it...right now in my anger I see it more as revenge, which isn't very wise I know. But we can't let this go...all I want is my dad back the way he was...but so far it doesn't look like thats gonna happen. Bad thing is my language goes in the gutter over this....I'm not a curser...really I'm not...but this seems to bring it out in me...and I have got to get a grip. I have never called somone what I called those interns on duty that day. Maybe I am feeling ashamed too because of the way I handled and am at this time handeling this. Love does hurt doesn't it? Love and Blessings, Angel What may be really hard to do also is to go up to them and say "I'm sorry for the way i acted" then right a way say to them "i also forgive you for messing up" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted September 5, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Author Share Posted September 5, 2004 I will think on this hard Trinity...thank you...I know your right I do...I just need to have enough control to say that to them...right now I absolutely wouldnt mean it...and would probably end up saying something else...but tomorrow is another day and I have tonight to talk with Jesus. Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Called Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 Angel, I know almost exactly where you are coming from...Let me give you a condensed version of what happened to my dad. My father had a massive heart attack in May of 2000. Now, granted this was not a hospital's fault or anything like that. It just happened. He was in and out of hospitals and a nursing home until October of 2000. That was the worst time of my families life. My father did lose his short term memory and cannot keep a straight thought, because he was without oxygen for too long. He is like that to this day. Where I can really relate is how he was treated and dismissed as not important. When my father was in the nursing home, they would leave him sitting in a wheelchair with his legs caught in the foot rests, they would forget to change his nitro patch, he had bruises on him and numerous other stuff that I don't want to get into. This broke our hearts and we were livid with those people. We told them what we thought when we finally got him out of there! Not very Christian, at all. I was very bitter and angry about the whole thing, but I realized that I had to forgive them. My eternal soul is more important and obeying Jesus is more important. Holding on to anger and bitterness only hurts you and your relationship with God. It allows the enemy to gain a stronghold in your life and he will come in and destroy you! You need to check your armor. Before you talk to those people again, pray! Fix your eyes on Jesus. He is altogether worthy. My advice, do what Jesus said and forgive them. All things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28 I am praying for you and your father. God Bless Debbie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts