DearJudy,OurLord Posted December 8, 2004 Group: Junior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 24 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 95 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 16 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/10/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 03/20/1980 Share Posted December 8, 2004 Hello everyone I have a co- worker, a sort of friend now cause we help eash other out whether it be money or lunch and car pooling .....thing is she hardly ever says thank you when i do something for her and it doesn't stop me from giving here a hand but this afternoon I realized how annoying it kind of is for instance to day (i know this will sound funny) but i only had 2 dollars for lunch and she had no money announcing it as soon as i get in the car and so we go to mcdonalds an order from the dollar menu so i offer to get her a burger (she said she was hungry) so we left came back to work not once saying thanks and it hurts a little and if i know your hungry i cant just ignore it so even if its my last buck hey lets share but I don't know i guess I would like to know if its appreciated ...I guess there is nothing i can do ....I just care the lord is watching ..what do u think God Bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted December 8, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted December 8, 2004 This is such a fine line...I have dealt with this myself...but with a family member...I always gave...a comment would always be made about how broke he was or I really need this and I guess I just have to wait til I get my check..etc...etc...all the while he had this opinion that it was owed to him. I'm serious here. He felt absolutely no compulsion to thank me...he honestly felt I owed him this because of the hard times he was having. Now heres the crux of the matter...he couldn't afford this or that...but he always had enough to buy lottery tickets or scratch offs. DearJudy I stopped. I ignored his complaints about being broke. I ignored his hints that he wanted this and that. I stopped. I think you may need to do this too. Giving is a wonderful thing and we shouldn't have it taken for granted and we as christians shouldn't be taken for granted. I may take slak for this but that is my advice to you if its as bad as all that. Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catsmeow Posted December 8, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 439 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 7,315 Content Per Day: 0.93 Reputation: 356 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/21/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted December 8, 2004 Judy, honey....you don't know it now but God is priming you for a tremendous service for Him. Why? Because this is ....ready?....a TEST! Yes, a test. You are being tested. Your patience is being tested under extreme conditions when ingratitude is the problem. I know it well. Let me share one thing with you...if you continue to show patience and godly kindness, when you least expect it....God will open the doors of heaven and pour out a blessing like you won't even believe. This is a testing season. You're doing FANTASTIC, Sis! It's OKAY to be angry and frustrated. You're passing the test better than I did but you're doing SUPER! Don't give up....lovingly and gently ask her if "she" has any money because you've simply run out. *(Keep protein bars in your purse for a day or two and use it as an opportunity to fast). Set boundaries but in sweetness and love. Yeah, it'll gripe you off...*(I know)...we ALL feel that way about moochers. Just don't give her everything she asks for. If she's not well socialized, do what I had to do for my own MOTHER....I used to say, "Ok, mother...what's the "magic word"? "Thank you".... I had to teach her *(my mother) manners. She didn't know how to be polite. She didn't have clue how to say 'thank you' or express thanks. Some people are here to refine us in fire....but boy is the reflection of Jesus beginning to shine. Don't worry if you're angry or frustrated. Jesus had a few choice words for the Pharisees, so he had some rough days too. But He was patient and long suffering. You're passing the test...and enduring the race....; you can still avoid being a "vending machine" using clever strategies but honey, God will bless you so richly in the right season. Keep your sweet spirit and kind heart steady...even if it takes it's toll. You're demonstrating the fine qualities of a true saint of God. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kabowd Posted December 8, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 112 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 3,489 Content Per Day: 0.48 Reputation: 13 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/28/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted December 8, 2004 The purest form of giving is giving without regard for whether or not anything is returned....not even a thank you. I've been raised to thank ppl and send thank-yous when I've been blessed by others...but some ppl haven't, they haven't been taught that. I think the only thing you can really do is give when the Lord prompts you to give and realize that God is the one who deserves the thank you really, not you. If you really think about it, it's kind of selfish and arrogant to think we deserve something for an act of kindness. Yes, it's nice to have...but anything good we do is a direct result of the Holy Spirit...so He deserves all the thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted December 9, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted December 9, 2004 Ya know I sure hope you all don't get the impression that I am selfish in my situation where I stopped giving. Yes I stopped...I gave and gave and gave to this family member....the largest being a car. And all he did is complain about it (the vehicle) 1 year later it needed new tires...he actually thought that it was my responsibilty to put 4 new tires on it. Sorry guys I don't mean to sound harsh here but I was led after that NOT to give to him anymore. Theres so much more to this story that would make your toes curl...but I won't share...because I hope you get the general idea. I am a giver...I love to give...I prefer to give anonymously...I have always felt more comfortable with the fact the family doesn't know who the Lord led to give them a hand up. I don't feel comfortable with someone "thanking" me I have never have. Just thought I would clear that up a little. Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kabowd Posted December 9, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 112 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 3,489 Content Per Day: 0.48 Reputation: 13 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/28/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted December 9, 2004 I think your situation sounds different. I was speaking in general and really not specifically about your case...sorry if it came across that way. I definitely don't believe that we should enable ppl to be irresponsible or to take advantage of us either. So...if you sense someone is doing that, I agree it should be stopped. I was just mainly speaking about if they fail to offer a "thank-you" ... not if they abuse our kindness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted December 9, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted December 9, 2004 thank you Tess...my emotions are high lately and I want to assure you I wasn't mad or anything. By the way welcome to the "clutz club" ya know its us natural born clutz's that have it all together Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
his Posted December 10, 2004 Group: Junior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 0 Topics Per Day: 0 Content Count: 93 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/31/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/25/1983 Share Posted December 10, 2004 The purest form of giving is giving without regard for whether or not anything is returned....not even a thank you. I've been raised to thank ppl and send thank-yous when I've been blessed by others...but some ppl haven't, they haven't been taught that. I think the only thing you can really do is give when the Lord prompts you to give and realize that God is the one who deserves the thank you really, not you. If you really think about it, it's kind of selfish and arrogant to think we deserve something for an act of kindness. Yes, it's nice to have...but anything good we do is a direct result of the Holy Spirit...so He deserves all the thanks. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Exactly...couldn't have put it better myself Tess. -HIS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest yod Posted December 10, 2004 Share Posted December 10, 2004 I gave and gave and gave to this family member....the largest being a car. I'll take a Cadillac anonymously if you'd rather not give to this person!??! And all he did is complain about it (the vehicle) 1 year later it needed new tires...he actually thought that it was my responsibilty to put 4 new tires on it. Will I also get that same tire warranty on my new Cadillac? Sorry guys I don't mean to sound harsh here but I was led after that NOT to give to him anymore. I am a giver...I love to give...I prefer to give anonymously... Oh I would just hate for you to have to stop having all this fun so you can send it to me anonymously every day and that will bring you SUCH joy!!!! PM me for the PO don't wait! do it now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted December 10, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted December 10, 2004 Love and Blessings, Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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