ray Posted December 28, 2004 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 281 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 789 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 0 Joined: 04/03/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted December 28, 2004 I have a friend, who happens to be girl. Who, by no means of her own fault or gender has issues I just can't ever fully understand, and not just because I'm a man. When we would get together we always ended up the evening in a some kind of verbal fight. She would take me over to her friends and fall asleep and I would have no way to get home but totaly feel uncomortable at a strangers house. Or when she fell asleep at my house I would wake her up and tell her she had to go home. She claimed she had no gas and she knew this before she came over I don't want you sleeping in my house. IF we go out and she does not come to my house and we just movies and burger king we have a great friendship.But the moment she put her head down shes out like a light bulb and this makes me comfortable. She sees nothing wrong with this. Than she calls me up out of the blue and we have not seen each other in 2 months and she acpects me to stop drop and roll for her no matter what. If I tell I will meet her somewhere she is happy than tries to invite herself over my house and say no. She claims I have no respect for her and thinks I'm being rude to her. I'm not trying to be rude. I'm just trying to avoid a situation that makes me feel uncomortable and I have told but she does not seem to care about my feelings and I can't make her understand because she is always right. What do I do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
refugepsa91 Posted December 29, 2004 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 331 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 5,961 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 61 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/25/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted December 29, 2004 ray, If she can't understand your position then agree only to meet in nuetral places....if she is a true friend she will understand why. Don't get into her car anymore so you don't have to rely on her transporting you home. I had a friend once, that invited me to a "pig roast" her cousin was having...well it sounded like fun so I went...great people they were and I had a good time...I turned my back for a moment and my "friend" had left with someone else...she left me there No ride home nothing...now yes these people seemed nice but I was definately not going to ask for a ride home....I had to find the owner of the home it was at and ask if I could use the phone....had to call my boyfriend (now husband) to come and get me....geez what a mess it was...moral of the story...I NEVER rode with her again...I always made sure I had my own transportation...even if it meant we drove seperately to the same place. Your doing the right thing ray...stay strong and stick to your convictions...you will come out a better person for it...I promise Love and Blessings, Angel By the way the verbal fighting at the end of the night...is probably because she isn't getting her way...I'm not trying to make her sound bad...I just think she knows she not gonna get what she wants so she vents on you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UndecidedFrog Posted December 29, 2004 Group: Nonbeliever Followers: 2 Topic Count: 16 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 2,063 Content Per Day: 0.29 Reputation: 15 Days Won: 1 Joined: 08/02/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted December 29, 2004 Dear ray, This is just my opinion. You don't have to accept it if you dislike it. DISCLAIMER: I am not a christian. You have every right to say no to things that make you uncomfortable. However, I would suggest a few things for you to think about. 1) Is your friend a narcoleptic? She sounds like she falls asleep often and at inappropriate times. 2) If your friend were male, would you object to any of your friend's suggestions/wishes/demands? 3) Have you had the serious talk with her about defining your relationship as friends instead of something more? Hope this helps. Regards, UndecidedFrog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Posted January 3, 2005 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 733 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 3,017 Content Per Day: 0.43 Reputation: 128 Days Won: 1 Joined: 01/01/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/09/1966 Share Posted January 3, 2005 ANGEL SAID :::::Your doing the right thing ray...stay strong and stick to your convictions...you will come out a better person for it...I promise ::::: You're absolutely right, Angel. Relationship/Friendship boundaries must be developed and defined! Ray, your "friend" is only thinking about herself and whatever is going to benefit or please her. She isn't considering your feelings at all. Is she really a "friend" or is she really just an acquaintance? (I've been through enough to not use the "friend" word lightly.) Again, I agree with Angel... If she won't respect your wishes, only meet her in neutral places. Keith Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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