Love Is Confuzzling!

[Adoni~Is~Alive~4~Ever]

So I met a guy online. He is a christian, and is 3 years older then me. We were friends for about a month. During that month I began to be very much so attracted to his strong biblical views and christian attitude.

I let him know my feeling for him, and the feelings where the same.

Now, as the months went on our friendship grew and so did our liking for each other. After about a month of talking to each other knowing we both liked each other, we grew fond of the idea if God allows, to court in a few years. We really are at peace with us getting married some day. We have received parents permission, and prayed oh so much to our Heavenly Father about the issue at hand. We gave the relationship to God. And believe He is either going to marry us, or break us. We are at peace with either, as long as its Gods will.

Not only do we talk online but over the phone and through snailmail. He had written a letter to my parents, and I wrote one to his mother since his father isn't there. We had a week end break where we didn't speak to each other or look at pictures or anything of that sort, but just prayed that whole week end and wrote our thoughts.

Right now we are just living life as friends.

He did ask me to be the third strand in his life until God either kept me there or replaces me. As in, that bible verse talking about a man with three strands, God, himself, and as I view a helper. And to me a helper is a woman from looking at where God makes Adam a helper!

Now many people say you can't love some one you have never met, is that true?

How do you know Gods will when it comes to this?

Is it right of me to have said yes to being a third strand?

-Mind you, I do know I am 15 (almost 16), and he is 18(almost 19).

But I just need advice! Cause I know he's been such a blessing to me, but how do you know when love is real? And not some dumb High School emotional crush?-

[RustyAngeL]

I'm going to sound like a mom here. Your only 15. You are far to young to be concerned about a permeant relationship especially over the computer. Your still a minor and have your education to think. He's 18 and is barely an adult himself. I would suggest that you end this. I"m sorry but people can say anything and appear to be anyone over the computer. What kind of a site did you meet him at? Do your parents know about this? Nope not going to give any encouragement to you about this. Your just to young and there are to many unknowns. Again at 15 your to young to even thinking about this. God has a plan for you and your life. If it is in His plans for you to be with this person it will happen, but at your age I find it hard to believe. If you were my daughter, I would be frightened for you. To many things have happened to young people that meet others over the computer. Please think about what I have said.

[Constant]

I would just cool it with this internet romance. Stay friends and if by chatting with him makes you want to be with him more and more, stop talking to him, take a long break. Age does matter in the sense that you need to consentrate on school, and being a 15 year old girl.

I worked with a girl who started dating this boy at 14, he was 16 and they are married for 4 yrs. now and she is 26! It does happen, my advise is to take it slow and let God direct you two together!

[Micah68]

I agree in parts with everyone who has responded. However, there are a couple of things you must know about this type of relationship. You say you gave the relationship to the Lord. That means you are willing to submit to whatever is His will. You must tell you parents about this relationship and the most important thing is that YOU MUST NEVER EVER MEET THIS PERSON ALONE!!! If you ever meet him, he must agree to meeting you together with your parents in a very public place! And even after that, until you know anything about him, you must continue to only see him in very public places. The sad truth about internet romances is that you don't know anything about this person at all. On the internet a person can fake whatever they want. They can create a whole personality that is totally untrue. You have to submit to whatever your parents say about this relationship. If they say to give it up, then give it up you must. They know what is best for you.

[Adoni~Is~Alive~4~Ever]

We have received parents permission,

Most of you must have over looked this cause a lot of you have said that I need to tell my parents.

Of course I'd never meet him in person alone!

1) Bad scene incase it is dangerous.

2) I want my parents to be in on any relationship I have.

3) I think we both would be like umm...so now what lol

4) Who would take the pictures jk lol

A lot of you have said I have an education to be thinking of, I forgot to mention, I am a 3.8 gpa student. And most likely to be graduated this June.

I would just cool it with this internet romance. Stay friends and if by chatting with him makes you want to be with him more and more, stop talking to him, take a long break.

We are just friends. If you didn't catch the note about IN A FEW YEARS, we would like to court.

Like once I'm 18!

Please think about what I have said.

I have heard you, and will think about it!

Another thing, mind you I have recieved hand written letters post marked from Maine. So either means he is really in Maine or is, hiring some one to send them from Maine! Which would be really weird but could happen, and I'm sure it has.

But I live in Washington and he ''lives'' in Maine.

It's not like I have to worry about walking down the street and being grabbed by him. I worry more about the people I've never talked to stalking me then him.

I met him on a Christian Chatroom. I saw his godlyness and I Pmed him and we shared testimonys and such. And kinda started there I guess!

~Becka

[Micah68]

Now many people say you can't love some one you have never met, is that true?

How do you know Gods will when it comes to this?

Is it right of me to have said yes to being a third strand?

-Mind you, I do know I am 15 (almost 16), and he is 18(almost 19).

But I just need advice! Cause I know he's been such a blessing to me, but how do you know when love is real? And not some dumb High School emotional crush?-

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well, you had asked us what we thought and most of the time we think that meeting someone on line is very dangerous. It's not impossible to fall in love with someone that you have never met. Since it never happened to me, I don't know. But it would seem that a mutual admiration would be a more appropriate description. It's good to admire someone's love for the Word of God. If in fact he loves the Word of God, you'll probably find that out over time. How do you know if something is God's will? You do a lot of introspection and prayer. You try to see how God is guiding your life. You let yourself have time to find out who you are and how God works with you. Love, if it is real, will endure the test of time and troubles. It will last through heartache and dry spells. A High School crush is just an emotional high without much foundation. True love in God's sight is based on a love for God first and foremost. A house built upon a rock will withstand the storms that will inevitably come. How do you know if your house is built upon the rock? You introspect on your conversations and thoughts. What do you talk about? Where is your mind focused?

Since you are yet young, the answers to these questions will come over time. It sounds like you are willing to wait. You have to be patient with us too. We could never give advice to a young person that such a relationship is terrific. I think that would be irresponsible of us. That doesn't mean that you and your parents would not be able to work it out. Who knows? Only God.

[Adoni~Is~Alive~4~Ever]

Thanks Micah!

You've really helped! Most people see my age an run from my questions!

Thank you!

Yeah!

I think God is truely building Broc and I into better "waiters" when it comes to just about anything! lol

I've noticed ever since him and I have been "admiring each other" I seem to have patients not only with relationships but with other people too!

I've watched both of us mature so much since we first met. I read my old words and I wonder what I was thinking. I seemed so immature. But yeah, I've defintly been given a lesson in patients, and i know i still have much more to learn!

Thanks again!

[Trinity]

I don't think it would be such a good idea. Just to let you know... Lots! of people can say biblical things. your 15 anyway, whats love got to do with it? got to do with it, got to do with it... sorry, i had that song stuck in my head right now

[Pipit]

Two close friends of mine met over the internet and after several years got married. They have an awesome relationship with each other and with Christ, and it has been amazing to have known them both when they first met in the chat room (we all kinda met in the same chat room at the same time), when they first met in person (I met them both in person the second time he travelled over from Sweden to Canada to see her), and now, after they have been married for 6 years, more in love with each other now then when they first met.

So yes, God can bring people together over the net. Of course, I can also cite a few examples of relationships gone bad that have happened over the net.

Adoni~is~Alive, You come across as a mature person (much more mature then many people my age!) who has given this much thought, and who is willing to take it easy as you allow your friendship to deepen, and more importantly is willing to keep your friendship Christ centred as it grows. That is an amazing thing. I would encourage you to continue with such a focus, waiting on God to reveal His purpose for you two, and to allow yourselves to mature and find out what God's plans are for you as individuals (and if God plans for you two to be together, His plans for you as indiviuals will bring you together).

Micah gives some good advice, both on building the house of the foundation and on waiting for God to reveal the answers. Allow time to reveal God's plan, don't rush in, but continue to wait. Seek first the kingdom of God, and all other things will be added on....

...and i pray that your friendship will be a blessing to both of you... even if it is to be just as friends!

[Adoni~Is~Alive~4~Ever]

Thanks for the thoughts!