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Rebound after a relationship?


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I was dumped a week and a half ago after liking this girl for like 18 or so months and she liked me for a year and we were boyfriend and girlfriend for 5 months.

She claimed she thought it was God's plan and all and I didn't really feel that it was but nonetheless, you can't are against that.

After about 2-3 attempts of going On Bended Knee(Boyz II Men fans know what that is) failed, I pretty much gave up and realized it was pointless... Even though she still likes me and I still like her...

But the main thing is... Is going in rebound a bad thing? From my past relationship(before I was a Christian) I went in rebound and got over the girl...

When I say rebound, I don't mean dating her because I know a lot of people do that... I mean just letting yourself like another girl to try and take away feelings for your ex...

What ya'll think?

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Guest susanke

Hi JesusFreak,

Sorry about the heart break. I think you are being too hasty on having a rebound just to get the feelings of yr ex out of the way. You need to take time before you get involved in another relationship. Dont get involved with someone just for just...remember that in all things we should be able to please God that involves our relationships too...and next time ask God to help you out when making such decisions.

All the best

susanke

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Guest susanke

Hi JesusFreak,

Sorry about the heart break. I think you are being too hasty on having a rebound just to get the feelings for yr ex out of the way. You need to take time before you get involved in another relationship. Dont get involved with someone just for just...remember that in all things we should be able to please God that involves our relationships too...and next time ask God to help you out when making such decisions...His say counts alot and will save you heartbreaks.

All the best

susanke

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The thing is, the rebound wasn't on purpose... I just got a crush randomly like 4 days after. I don't want a relationship, though... I agree. In rebound, there should never be a relationship in it... I say just like her and maybe you'll get over your ex. ya know?

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I was dumped a week and a half ago after liking this girl for like 18 or so months and she liked me for a year and we were boyfriend and girlfriend for 5 months.

She claimed she thought it was God's plan and all and I didn't really feel that it was but nonetheless, you can't are against that.

After about 2-3 attempts of going On Bended Knee(Boyz II Men fans know what that is) failed, I pretty much gave up and realized it was pointless... Even though she still likes me and I still like her...

But the main thing is... Is going in rebound a bad thing? From my past relationship(before I was a Christian) I went in rebound and got over the girl...

When I say rebound, I don't mean dating her because I know a lot of people do that... I mean just letting yourself like another girl to try and take away feelings for your ex...

What ya'll think?

I just got out of a serious relationship about a month ago (we were supposed to get married this coming weekend), and what I have really felt deeply this time around is that I should not do the whole rebound thing. I think that God wants us to turn to him to fill the hole that our partner has left in our life. In fact, few relationships work very well when you feel that you NEED to have that other person by your side. The idea of love and marriage is to have the added blessing of a partner in everything you do.

The trouble with rebounds is that once you find someone that you make "like", what's really to prevent you from dating them? I mean right now your heart is fairly vulnerable (yes even if you are a guy), and you might be a little less picky about this rebound chick, but then what if you eventually do "settle" and date her and she really isn't the right person for you? Rebounds may help, but I think eventually they often just add on to the heartache you are already experiencing.

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What ya'll think?

:whistling:

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 6:33

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Thanks for that perfect word, Joe! :whistling:

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Thanks for the advice guys and I gotta admit, I agree fully with what ya'll said.

Now I have a different opinion on it. Thanks.

Stay blessed. :laugh:

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Thanks for the advice guys and I gotta admit, I agree fully with what ya'll said.

Now I have a different opinion on it. Thanks.

Stay blessed. :laugh:

If I can add anything to some already beautiful advice :emot-hug: :

I am a man who struggled with relationships/marriage at various times in my life and until I became serious about Christ, this continued. First, God has always demanded First place in any of His people's hearts. Jesus re-enforced this in Matt 10:37 and Luke 14:26.

Someone (I believe heiress) posted something to the effect of God desiring to fill the place where a spouse or beloved has left a void in our hearts. True but.... God demands to have had that place first before anyone ever took or was given it. Brother FresnoJoe posted the perfect Scripture:

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 6:33

It was only when I spent a year doing so and (unbeknown to me) a woman in Texas I had never met ( I lived in Oregon ) did the same after each of our respective spouses left us for someone else, that we encountered each other in a Christian forum similiar to this one. But, neither of us had any inclination or desire for each other. It was only while I was forwarding my Biblical work about the lies of these end times (i.e. Left Behind lies, etc...) that The Lord spoke to me and told me to tell her I loved her. I was taken aback! I resisted because as far as I knew, I DIDN'T love her and had never met her! But He very quickly while in the middle of my "protest" reminded me that I quit dating, turned all of this over to Him, and had trusted that if there was someone for me; she would have to love Him more than me and He would have to pick her out, show me her Himself and open all the doors (that no man including myself could shut) and confirm to both of us in miraculous ways we would each know.

We were married 6 months later in June 2000 and have never known such bliss and love nor a combined love for Jesus that was ever so powerful. Eight years and never an argument or fight and our love has only increased! But this only came about because we followed the very verse above. God pre-arranged our marriage the old fashioned way and it is perfect! And both of us still put Jesus First before each other.

There is NO Such thing as a "Soul Mate" except Jesus! No one else belongs there except Him and He will not tolerate anyone else in His Place in your heart.

Is God in the "Spouse Replacement business"? No.... We know of many more marriages that have been healed and set right when at least one of the spouses were willing to submit and follow the above Scripture prescription! In most of their cases the other spouse became Christ's and was born again and their marriage was healed and every bit as blissful and full as my own!

If Jesus is not in that special deepest heart place in each of us, He is not enthroned or "On The Throne" of your heart and nothing will ever work or be right in any area including relationships until He is.

Blessings in Christ Jesus

Brother Ron Cruise

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