well manonfire63 you made a lot of good points. I have experienced this time when I lost all faith in God. I had gotten so terrified of God that I felt I was sure I was going to hell. Guilt was all around me and I just thought I couldn't escape it.
As you can see remember that Peter fell into the water. But Peter was still a true follower of God and that Jesus wouldn't let him drown. Remember that the disciples thought they were going to die on the ship during the storm. They truly followed God and Jesus saved them. I don't think I ever have been as good as the disciples in behavior. Sometimes are faith is less and sometimes more.
I believe that Paul said in the Epistles that some people have more faith and some people have less faith. That doesn't mean one that has less faith isn't saved. But those whose faith is greater in God is the ones that set the better example for us.
We just have to keep trying in life. Try to talk to friends and family. Do what we like to do. For some it maybe sewing, baking, auto mechanics and things that you enjoy in life. It's the devil that wants to you to give up on everything. Last is to say that's it's better to try then not try at all.