Hi. This might sound really immature from your perspective but I'm sick of it. Please hear me out.
I'm 16, a junior in high school. I go to a Christian private school. I have not had a legitimate girlfriend yet. A few flames that quickly flickered out, but nothing "normal". I've not even kissed a girl yet. Every one of my peers has had at least one relationship already. Every day I see their sappy social media posts and pictures with each other and it's a constant numb pain in my torso. Don't get me wrong, I'm not seeking attention. Humbly I know I am somewhat attractive. I know I've got game (did I just say that, wow). For real though. I'm just another normal kid and thankfully there's nothing wrong with me, socially or any other way. But every single time I've tried to spark a relationship with someone that I know is in my league, some ridiculous thing just so happens to come up out of nowhere and the spark fizzles out. When I look back, every attempt I've made got messed up in some stupid way that you would think would be extremely rare but happens every time with me. At least 7+ times. It doesn't matter whether they like me or not. It doesn't matter who it is. Nothing ever comes of it no matter what I try. Why can't I just have fun and enjoy puppy love while I'm still a teenager? Is that just forbidden for me? Why am I being prevented from doing normal teenage stuff? At first I didn't care, but it's built up so much over time. I'm literally sick for that feeling of humanly intimate love (not sex). I want what every other teenager has, but I can't have it. I see absolutely no reason why. I've taken this to God many, many times through prayer, but either nothing happens, or the feeling subsides for a small while. I'm sick of just those two results. I'm doing good in school and other things, there's literally no reason I see why I can't enjoy teenager puppy love. I can't have fun like that once I'm an adult. Laugh it up all you want but I'm so sick of it. It is taking a mental toll on me. I've asked my parents for advice on this, but they're like "Oh honey, that's not real love, wait until you're older." Well it seems like every other teenager's doing fine and enjoying their sappy relationships. I've felt sickly strong love a few times before, but it was never reciprocated. For literally the dumbest reasons. I just want to feel humanly love and have it reciprocated for once. I am pining for something that every other teenager has had at least once, but I've never got it and probably not soon at all. I know that God loves me and that is supposed to fill every void in my heart. I have a great relationship with the Lord but apparently that's not enough? Okay??? I'm pretty sure God's love should be more than enough love in my life! I'm stupidly confused. Thank you for your time. Any insight is appreciated. God bless.