GodPreciousChild Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 22 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 52 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/28/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 Hi, Im talking to this guy via phone. Weve been talking for months, we used to see each other but that just ended one day because he claims he is so stressed and busy (rolls eyes) but he never fails to text me or call me pretty much every night (innocent friendly chats). Ive asked if we can see each other and he gives me the usual excuses as to why he cant and then the phone contact continues. I figure that he just is using me for phone companionship. Maybe he's bored or lonely or needs an ego boost or all of the above. Maybe he enjoys talking to me as a friend, I dont know. My guess is that I am a sort of lonely, caring and low key and humble person that maybe he finds comfortable and ever so readily available to talk to...I dont know. Part of me feels like I should just accept this and allow the phone contact to continue. Another part of me wonders if it is a good idea to end it somehow. Opinions, thoughts, ideas would be appreciated.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Believer1997 Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 66 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 6,363 Content Per Day: 1.13 Reputation: 119 Days Won: 9 Joined: 11/07/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 By the title of your post "Being used" that is what you think is happening in this "relationship". Only you can allow yourself to be "used". If you feel that way and it's not a relationship that makes you happy or is pleasing to you as a Christian.... Don't answer the phone or the texts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Removed from Forums for Breaking Terms of Service Followers: 1 Topic Count: 9 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 871 Content Per Day: 0.15 Reputation: 17 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/28/2007 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 Take your time with this, no need to stress someone who you don't feel is in the same boat as you. Pray for him, but keep him at a distance. Never be reckless with someones feelings, but also don't tolerate anyone who might do it to yours. If you think he is dancing around, move on, stay in your walk with Christ and be friendly but don't give any leadway to games...you know? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2Joyful Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 48 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,901 Content Per Day: 0.35 Reputation: 365 Days Won: 29 Joined: 08/16/2009 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 Hi, Im talking to this guy via phone. Weve been talking for months, we used to see each other but that just ended one day because he claims he is so stressed and busy (rolls eyes) Ive asked if we can see each other and he gives me the usual excuses as to why he cant and then the phone contact continues. I figure that he just is using me for phone companionship. Maybe he's bored or lonely or needs an ego boost or all of the above. Maybe he enjoys talking to me as a friend, I dont know. My guess is that I am a sort of lonely, caring and low key and humble person that maybe he finds comfortable and ever so readily available to talk to...I dont know. Part of me feels like I should just accept this and allow the phone contact to continue. Another part of me wonders if it is a good idea to end it somehow. Opinions, thoughts, ideas would be appreciated.... Blessings GPC, I share this only with love. You do not need our thoughts, opinions or ideas, you have already answered your own question. You are not being forced into this relationship, you are inviting it into your life. People will only take from us, what we allow them to. The last part you posted, "part of me feels like....another part of me wonders...both parts make a whole statement that says, "get out" of this dead relationship. There's an old saying my elders use to say, "why settle for the margarine, when you can have the butter? In other words..."you are fearfully, marvelous and wonderfully made", and you should never live below what God created you to be or have concerning your life....jotful Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodPreciousChild Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 22 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 52 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/28/2008 Status: Offline Author Share Posted November 7, 2009 Thanks all- One of the first things I think of when I think of not talking to him anymore is how I dont want him to be lonely and sad and I dont want him to not have anyone to talk to. I think I also like having that "special" role of being the one that he uses every night. I know it sounds crazy but Im just airing my thoughts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Believer1997 Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 66 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 6,363 Content Per Day: 1.13 Reputation: 119 Days Won: 9 Joined: 11/07/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 Thanks all- One of the first things I think of when I think of not talking to him anymore is how I dont want him to be lonely and sad and I dont want him to not have anyone to talk to. I think I also like having that "special" role of being the one that he uses every night. I know it sounds crazy but Im just airing my thoughts. Perhaps this isn't a problem after all - I don't know of anything 'special' about being used though. I hope you work things out and come to terms with what you'll accept as a relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2Joyful Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 48 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,901 Content Per Day: 0.35 Reputation: 365 Days Won: 29 Joined: 08/16/2009 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 Thanks all- One of the first things I think of when I think of not talking to him anymore is how I dont want him to be lonely and sad and I dont want him to not have anyone to talk to. I think I also like having that "special" role of being the one that he uses every night. I know it sounds crazy but Im just airing my thoughts. Perhaps this isn't a problem after all - I don't know of anything 'special' about being used though. I hope you work things out and come to terms with what you'll accept as a relationship. Same here GPC, I hope all works out for you..jot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creed Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 0 Topics Per Day: 0 Content Count: 333 Content Per Day: 0.06 Reputation: 32 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/30/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2009 Back in my single day, I put up with alot of silliness from guys because I was lonely. I'm taking an educated guess that if there was someone special in your life, you wouldn't think twice about Mr. Talk on Phone but Don't Take Her Out. I guess I wouldn't be too concerned about him being lonely/having no one to talk to because you've made it clear to him that you'd like to see him. Unless he has a fear of open places, I'd say since you're content to just talk on the phone, then so is he. Hugs, GPC. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fez Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Royal Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 683 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 11,128 Content Per Day: 2.00 Reputation: 1,352 Days Won: 54 Joined: 02/03/2009 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/07/1952 Share Posted November 7, 2009 Hi, Im talking to this guy via phone. Weve been talking for months, we used to see each other but that just ended one day because he claims he is so stressed and busy (rolls eyes) but he never fails to text me or call me pretty much every night (innocent friendly chats). Ive asked if we can see each other and he gives me the usual excuses as to why he cant and then the phone contact continues. I figure that he just is using me for phone companionship. Maybe he's bored or lonely or needs an ego boost or all of the above. Maybe he enjoys talking to me as a friend, I dont know. My guess is that I am a sort of lonely, caring and low key and humble person that maybe he finds comfortable and ever so readily available to talk to...I dont know. Part of me feels like I should just accept this and allow the phone contact to continue. Another part of me wonders if it is a good idea to end it somehow. Opinions, thoughts, ideas would be appreciated.... Just as a matter of interest, where did you used to see each other. Was it in a place of his choosing, or yours? And what did you feel when you met him? Blessings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodPreciousChild Posted November 7, 2009 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 22 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 52 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/28/2008 Status: Offline Author Share Posted November 7, 2009 Hi, Im talking to this guy via phone. Weve been talking for months, we used to see each other but that just ended one day because he claims he is so stressed and busy (rolls eyes) but he never fails to text me or call me pretty much every night (innocent friendly chats). Ive asked if we can see each other and he gives me the usual excuses as to why he cant and then the phone contact continues. I figure that he just is using me for phone companionship. Maybe he's bored or lonely or needs an ego boost or all of the above. Maybe he enjoys talking to me as a friend, I dont know. My guess is that I am a sort of lonely, caring and low key and humble person that maybe he finds comfortable and ever so readily available to talk to...I dont know. Part of me feels like I should just accept this and allow the phone contact to continue. Another part of me wonders if it is a good idea to end it somehow. Opinions, thoughts, ideas would be appreciated.... Just as a matter of interest, where did you used to see each other. Was it in a place of his choosing, or yours? And what did you feel when you met him? Blessings We hung out at a little cafe or his place. It felt great, he treated me wonderfully and seemed to be really into me at the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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