Something broken in me

[Guest]

I just want you to know that I will pray for you! We all have various struggles in Christianity. I've learned in those times to focus more on the "Christ" part...

Amen!

Praying!

[peaches]

There is not one church in all of the metropolis of Toronto that you can worship God? Church is an oppurtunity for us to worship Him, and at the same time love our neighbors and join with other believers in body and spirit. It is SO important. It doesn't matter if you don't agree 100% with the pastor or priest, or with the denomination, it's not about that, it is about coming together as the Body of Christ and partaking of communion and worship together. To read his word together. To pray together. Nobody is perfect. If only perfect people went to church the pews would be empty.

Obviously, God has blessed you with a home church you are comfortable doing all of that with. Please dont knock the rest us who do not have, yet yearn for, the same blessing you have.

[fromIslam2Christ]

I want to say thank you to every one here who shared. You all said things I needed to hear and it is comforting to know it is part of the walk... being in the desert sometimes, the dryness, yet knowing there will be an oasis... Thanks.

Also, I praise God that I am now in a good church. It is part of the PAOC (pentecostal assemblies of canada) where I was orginally baptized last may. It was my own mistake to stray away from the PAOC and get into a smaller independent church where all the abusive spiritual practices occurred (cultish). Now in this good PAOC church, even though I know they are a good Bible-based church, I am a bit nervous at times... The trauma, I guess...?

Thanks for the messages of hope.

Blien I totally understand where you are coming from with the difficulties in finding good churches. I will pray for you too...

[georgedrw81]

I just want you to know that I will pray for you! We all have various struggles in Christianity. I've learned in those times to focus more on the "Christ" part...and leave the "ianity" alone.

Right.

Praying

[CSLewis]

There is not one church in all of the metropolis of Toronto that you can worship God? Church is an oppurtunity for us to worship Him, and at the same time love our neighbors and join with other believers in body and spirit. It is SO important. It doesn't matter if you don't agree 100% with the pastor or priest, or with the denomination, it's not about that, it is about coming together as the Body of Christ and partaking of communion and worship together. To read his word together. To pray together. Nobody is perfect. If only perfect people went to church the pews would be empty.

Obviously, God has blessed you with a home church you are comfortable doing all of that with. Please dont knock the rest us who do not have, yet yearn for, the same blessing you have.

I am not knocking anyone for feeling uncomfortable at church. I went to an assemblies of God church in back woods east Texas for a year- I was very uncomfortable. I am now in an orthodox church and love the liturgy, the prayer, the people, the open minded bible study, the welcoming feeling I get by all the members. But it isn't necessarily about my comfort. Also I must say the assemblies of God denomination is very missions focused and I loved that. And If you really look you will find the Holy Spirit in any church. Catholic, Protestant, Pentecostal, -

another huge thing that we need is discipleship and accountability- this means the elders in the church know you take you under there wing - teach you how to be a man of God, someone in your darkest hour that you can call up and just say Brother so and so I am going through this issue and they will say all right I am coming over right now. Or there is a death in the church. Everyone gathers around the new widow and we pray for her and we take care of her and we repaint her house . We reach out and help each other and we get involved and yes it is messy. And you can't hide behind a computer screen. But it is those moments of messiness that we cry out to God and build each other

back up. This truly is at the heart of most churches. We are called to be a family. Yes at times it is a dysfunctional family. But yes it is a family. And it is what we are - we are Christians and it is what Christians do- love. And maybe instead of having the mindset of looking to be loved when we go to church we looked for someone to love at church. And invite them to dinner and reach out and be involved because that person may need you and he came to church with a burden and maybe we can share that burden. These are just my thoughts but I am very passionate about it.

Peace

[Guest]

Praying!

Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution. 2 Timothy 3:12

You Were Never Alone Dear Sister

When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. Isaiah 43:2

Nor Are You Tonight

for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. Hebrews 13:15 (c-d)

Be Blessed Beloved Daughter Of The KING

Love, Your Brother Joe

[Blien]

There is not one church in all of the metropolis of Toronto that you can worship God? Church is an oppurtunity for us to worship Him, and at the same time love our neighbors and join with other believers in body and spirit. It is SO important. It doesn't matter if you don't agree 100% with the pastor or priest, or with the denomination, it's not about that, it is about coming together as the Body of Christ and partaking of communion and worship together. To read his word together. To pray together. Nobody is perfect. If only perfect people went to church the pews would be empty.

Obviously, God has blessed you with a home church you are comfortable doing all of that with. Please dont knock the rest us who do not have, yet yearn for, the same blessing you have.

I am not knocking anyone for feeling uncomfortable at church. I went to an assemblies of God church in back woods east Texas for a year- I was very uncomfortable. I am now in an orthodox church and love the liturgy, the prayer, the people, the open minded bible study, the welcoming feeling I get by all the members. But it isn't necessarily about my comfort. Also I must say the assemblies of God denomination is very missions focused and I loved that. And If you really look you will find the Holy Spirit in any church. Catholic, Protestant, Pentecostal, -

another huge thing that we need is discipleship and accountability- this means the elders in the church know you take you under there wing - teach you how to be a man of God, someone in your darkest hour that you can call up and just say Brother so and so I am going through this issue and they will say all right I am coming over right now. Or there is a death in the church. Everyone gathers around the new widow and we pray for her and we take care of her and we repaint her house . We reach out and help each other and we get involved and yes it is messy. And you can't hide behind a computer screen. But it is those moments of messiness that we cry out to God and build each other

back up. This truly is at the heart of most churches. We are called to be a family. Yes at times it is a dysfunctional family. But yes it is a family. And it is what we are - we are Christians and it is what Christians do- love. And maybe instead of having the mindset of looking to be loved when we go to church we looked for someone to love at church. And invite them to dinner and reach out and be involved because that person may need you and he came to church with a burden and maybe we can share that burden. These are just my thoughts but I am very passionate about it.

Peace

Well that sure explains a lot regarding your post but might I remind you brother the words of Jesus before He left Earth. Have you been acting this way in your posts?

John 13:34-35

34 So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

So tell me, why did you decided to go into Orthodoxy? My whole family is Orthodox, I left them to follow the true gospel of the Bible. Here are somethings which the Orthodox church teaches which is absolutely contrary to the Bible.

1. Abstaining from Meats (especially pork)

Mark 7:18-20

18 “Don’t you understand either?” he asked. “Can’t you see that the food you put into your body cannot defile you? 19 Food doesn’t go into your heart, but only passes through the stomach and then goes into the sewer.” (By saying this, he declared that every kind of food is acceptable in God’s eyes.) 20 And then he added, “It is what comes from inside that defiles you.

1 Timothy 4:1-4

1 Now the Holy Spirit tells us clearly that in the last times some will turn away from the true faith; they will follow deceptive spirits and teachings that come from demons. 2 These people are hypocrites and liars, and their consciences are dead.

3 They will say it is wrong to be married and wrong to eat certain foods. But God created those foods to be eaten with thanks by faithful people who know the truth. 4 Since everything God created is good, we should not reject any of it but receive it with thanks.

2. Praying to Mary for salvation

1 Timothy 2:5

5 For there is only one God and one Mediator who can reconcile God and humanity—the man Christ Jesus.

3. Praying to Mary and the past Saints for intercession, wisdom, etc. (necromancy)

1 Timothy 2:5

5 For there is only one God and one Mediator who can reconcile God and humanity—the man Christ Jesus.

I highly encourage you to read 1 Samuel 28:4-20 which is here or your own Bible at home.

[fromIslam2Christ]

Praying!

Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution. 2 Timothy 3:12

You Were Never Alone Dear Sister

When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. Isaiah 43:2

Nor Are You Tonight

for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. Hebrews 13:15 (c-d)

Be Blessed Beloved Daughter Of The KING

Love, Your Brother Joe

AMEN, AMEN!!!

Thanks for all your prayers, i have managed to pray and feel the Holy Spirit last night and again this morning!!!! God is a faithful god!!!! The GREAT I AM!!

[fromIslam2Christ]

so glad you are feeling better! joe's post blessed me too. my struggles are not the same as yours, but the same Bible helps!

in your first post, you sounded depressed. are you sure that's not what is going on?

and i'm sure you've heard this before, but be careful about feelings. we need to have the feelings, that's why God gave them to us. (some people need them more than others.) but if we rely too heavily on feelings, we get ourselves into trouble. like an old song says, "sometimes emotion is there; sometimes it's not. but it's not the feeling that counts, but the faith that we have got."

you are an encouragement, 2Christ. even tho you are not yet through your struggles, in the midst of them you are an encouragment! thank you for sharing with us!

Charitow

What you are saying about feelings is so important and true. I think I was on a "high" for while with those "feelings and emotions" while praying or attending services... And forgot that it is about faith. Not emotions. Thank you for reminding me.

You are also right about the depression part... But to God be the glory!

God bless you for your encouraging post.

[Godstuff]

I recently left an abusive church, whose doctrines were off and where my trust was betrayed. At first I felt relief and peace and joy in my heart after leaving.

But now, it seems there is an emptiness in me (spiritually). And I am still trying to figure out what to believe and what not to believe, all my doctrinal conceptions are OFF now.

I attend a new church, go to all the services, Bible studies, prayer meetings, because I feel this thirst of having this feeling of being connected to God (which by the way I had while going to that cultish church) and wanting to feel the Holy Spirit.

Yesterday while at a church prayer meeting, I was struggling. It was as if I couldn't pray even. I was numb. The best way to describe the feeling is this piece of steel in my chest instead of my heart. Physically i feel some kind of pressure on the left side of my chest where my heart is. During the service, I found myself observing other people a lot, looking at the time, wanting this whole thing to end.

As a result of all this, I feel upset with myself. I feel like there are these good Christians on one side, and me on the other because of this numbness. I dont trust my fellow Christians any more at all. I feel someone, pastor or church member or friend, is going to stab me in the back at the first opportunity. I dont have many Christian friends, but the couple I have been making all seem to be only wanting things from me: a place to stay, money to borrow, rides, info and lectures about Islam. Thats not counting the Christian men I have encountered who behaved worse than non-Christians in terms of morals and behaviour, yet are highly respected in churches because they pray very loud and attend all church activities. So it is a feeling of isolation. I dont confide in any Christian I know because I will be told the same thing: pray about it, and read your Bible.I am already doing this. I trust God hears me and will help me at some point. I find the people who truly care about me are my non-Christian friends (with years of friendship) but I dont want to confide in them because they will think Christianity is a poor life choice if I am going through a depression after converting...

We are supposed to be the salt of the earth and lights. Instead mentally I am crumbling to pieces. What a bad testimony!

This is affecting my work. I wake up every morning feeling a cloud over my life and then can,t concentrate on writing papers, grading exams... nothing. All I want to do is get under the covers and sleep and forget about everything.

I know God is here somewhere but I have this feeling I have failed Him and can't have a positive outlook on my future.

Thanks for listening.

God bless you for your honesty in this post! I think a lot of us will understand where you are coming from and for me personally, my personal relationship with God especially during my quiet time, is what has strengthened me and helped me cope. Knowing who you are in God, is your mainstay. Never focus on men/women and believe me there is no such thing as a good Christian - everyone is just someone going through their walk with God, some are just better at it than others!

I really pray that you can find a church where you can feel at home because you need the fellowship and teaching to grow spiritually. Having the support of people who genuinely care and love you is an immense blessing. You are in my prayers. God bless you!