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Too Much on my Plate...how can I deal with anything anymore


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Hi, Right now I feel like everything is caving in around me...For starters I am mentally disabled...I was diagnosed with Extreme Bi polar, anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, Borderline Intellectual Functioning and PTSD. I was diagnosed when I was 14. It has been 4 1/2 years since I last cut on myself or overdosed. I do have a hard time managing my stress because of all my mental disorders...I have a 3 year old son that I try so hard to take care of by myself but I seem to get so stressed out about every little thing that happens. I have a genetic Blood Disorder called Glucose 6 Phosphate Dehydrogenase Deficiency and because of this blood disorder, I am most always sick with a cold or flu almost everyday...I also get kidney stones every month and I get tired of always going in to the doctor and asking them for help because they always make me wait up to 2 weeks to get any sort of scans and they get irritated with me because I refuse to take any pain med (because I have my 3 year old son to take care of) even though I collapse several times a day from the extreme pain and nausea. I get SSI for my disability (674 a month) and that is all my son and I have to live on...with our rent and bills that add up to 615...I don't have enough to buy My sons pull ups, wipes and everyday household items...I feel like I'm going to explode with everything I'm dealing with....I can't turn on my heat right now because I don't have the money to be paying a higher electric bill...but how can I not turn on the heat because of my son...I feel like I am doomed to fail being a parent...I get so stressed that I start thinking about cutting myself...so far I haven't but I still fear I may start doing it again..I don't know what I can do or what anyone can do, but I am so tired of keeping this all in... :runforhills:

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praying for you :wub:

P.S. God is good all the time.

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Thank you! I know God is good, but I wonder sometimes if I'm good enough for God.

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Thank you! I know God is good, but I wonder sometimes if I'm good enough for God.

First off I am praying. Second off is this. He does not love us because of who we are. He loves us because of who HE is.

He loved you and knew you as he or even before he created the earth. He knew the suffering he would suffer on the cross for you, before you were born, and yet, he loved you so much he chose to do it to bring you into you eternal relationship with him.

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praying for you and your son,plus your needs

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Praying emot-hug.gif. Do you have a social worker you can talk to?

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You and your son will be in my prayers.

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Thank you! I know God is good, but I wonder sometimes if I'm good enough for God.

None of us could ever be good enough for Him. But Jesus died that we could be saved. :thumbsup:

Set your mind on things above. :wub:

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Praying emot-hug.gif. Do you have a social worker you can talk to?

I have talked to a social worker in the past and she tried to get me to see a councilor, but that can't be much of an option right now, because my son can't come with me because he is old enough that he can't be in the room with me while talking about the things I need to talk about...I have to wait until he is school age for me to go....especially since I can't drive yet, my son would have to be in child care all day, once a week and I can't afford that right now..

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Thank you! I know God is good, but I wonder sometimes if I'm good enough for God.

First off I am praying. Second off is this. He does not love us because of who we are. He loves us because of who HE is.

He loved you and knew you as he or even before he created the earth. He knew the suffering he would suffer on the cross for you, before you were born, and yet, he loved you so much he chose to do it to bring you into you eternal relationship with him.

You are right! I question things sometimes and I am glad God forgives me for questioning him :amen:

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