Should I or Shouldn't I?

[Keith]

I'm someone who enjoys living simply and owning very little.  Things don't impress/tempt me at all.  I'm sincerely content and desire nothing materially.  (I don't own a home, car, TV, radio, stereo, CDs, DVDs, video games, smart phone, toaster, microwave, or anything other than basic furniture, a few books and my iMac computer.)  As a Christian for nearly 32 years, I have come to know God faithfully as my Source and my Provider.  I don't stress over material things, including money.  (Even during lengthy periods of unemployment, without any benefits or people to turn to for help.)  I also don't have credit cards and pay cash on the barrelhead for everything I do buy.  Disclaimer:  These are choices I've made for myself and don't proclaim that everyone else should do this, too. 

 

With that said, tax season is quickly upon us.  We'll have our W2 forms by the end of January.  I always file my taxes the same day I receive them because mine are very simple, taking only ten minutes to do.  I always receive a refund because I'm single, and always claim "one" on my W4 form.  This year, I'm expecting enough from my tax refund to be able to buy a new computer.  My current iMac is a mid-2007 model, which still works fine, but will soon be unsupported by many current softwares.

 

Quickly, here's my personal situation:  I was unemployed for eight-and-a-half months, without benefits of any kind or assistance from any person, during which, God supplied my every need without fail.  (God purposed this for a reason that I may post in testimonies at some time.)  On April 28th, I got a part-time job as a caretaker in my apartment complex.  That takes care of my rent and, because I live in a studio, also provides me enough to pay my electric, telephone, and internet bills.  I'm left with about $75 a month for food.  Believe me when I say, I'm the most blessed person on this planet!  My joy is complete and I lack absolutely NOTHING!  A part-time job supplies my needs and blesses me with control over my own schedule and gives me unlimited time daily to spend in prayer, study and worship of Him!

 

Here's my quandary:  Do I use my tax refund to buy a new computer?  Here's why I ask...

 

My biggest desire is to glorify God with the time we have left.  I want to live in the fulness of what God intended for Christians to live in.  Many people would hear that as, "God wants me to be happy and prosperous."  Not me.  My desire is to know Him and be known by Him; to walk as Enoch walked with Him.  I don't see a lot of this going on in today's version of Christianity in western churches. 

 

Please know that I'm not talking about guilt or legalism.  Could I buy a new computer with my tax refund?  Of course!  Would it anger God?  Of course not!  I am in perfect liberty to do so! 

 

But, as I continue to grow in my love for HIm, I can't ignore how many people need Jesus.  I can't ignore the sick and the poor around the world.  How can I justify a new computer when the one I have still works, no matter how old it is?  I want my stewardship to honor God and bless others.  I want God's eternal rewards, not the things this world has to offer.

 

With all of that said, I'm mostly wondering how others in the body of Christ see the matter.  I'm not confused, doubtful or worrying about this in any way.  I have the matter in prayer and will wait for His answer.  No decisions have to be made now.  Tax Day isn't here and I don't have the money in my hands.  I'm remaining scriptural about not worrying about tomorrow.  When the Holy Spirit prompts me in any way, I will obey it immediately in joy and complete surrender.  And if I receive no prompting either way?  I'll trust Him in that moment.

 

I guess I'm really asking an old question:  "How then are we to live?"  When do we exercise our liberty in Christ to spend on ourselves like this instead of giving to others? 

 

 

[Keith]

As I've been thinking about this, I wanted to clarify something that's important to me.

 

This thread is not a veiled attempt to show how "wonderful" I am in any way.  I assure you... wonderful I am not!  Yes, I'm seeking God over this and will obey whatever the answer is.  But, I'm very sincere when I ask for your thoughts on this because I really do want to buy a new computer.  I've had computers that couldn't be updated anymore and it's a nightmare.  This one is getting there. 

 

In the natural, this is very likely the only time I'll have the money in one lump sum in order to buy a new computer.  But, Christianity isn't lived in the natural.  We don't think and operate the way the world does because of who God is.  It's because of that, that I would rather use the money towards eternal things, honoring God and blessing others. 

 

If anything, this is showing me how weak my faith really is, which is humbling.  Knowing God as my Provider, like I do, how could I waver with not using my tax return to bless others?  If I need a new computer, God's capable of providing one, isn't He?  Of course!  He's not subject to my financial situation, the economy, or anything else!  Right now I feel like I'm failing the faith test. 

[blue gem]

Hi, can't answer that one for you, only you can, but I know what you mean.

I've had a few similar should I shouldn't I debates with myself over the years.

The last time I bought a computer I felt a bit guilty, but then lots of opportunities came my way to use it for church stuff (putting a prayer diary together and prayer sheet, printing out information for others etc etc.)

Another big one was that I play the saxophone and got a second hand practically brand new alto sax for a fraction of the price. I played in the worship team, but then the opportunity arose to buy a new soprano saxophone, they are very very very expensive and oh my I almost felt like fainting when I saw the price of the one I wanted. I spent ages trying to decide and felt guilty and wondered if I was being selfish as I had a good instrument already. But then I decided to take the plunge, and asked at a local music store about the one I wanted.

They did not stock it (they only had cheap nasty beginners soprano saxophones which sounded awful) but then the store keeper rang me and said he would order it for me and I could come down and try it out with no obligation at all for me to buy it.

I really felt God was In that, so when it arrived I went to the shop. Sopranos are notoriously hard to play especially the higher notes, but it played like a dream and I got all the range of notes out of it straight away. I saw that as another sign that it was meant to be.

Thirdly the store owner said he would give me £700 off the retail price if I wanted it, so at that point I just knew it was God and I acquired it.

Fourthly the sound is different to my other alto sax and it meant I was able to bring more variety in my playing to the worship team, which has been a blessing. I was in the worship team for over ten years but sadly have had to stand down now due to pressures of work and looking after an elderly relative. But I sure there will be other opportunities to play.

I think when it comes to money and buying extravagant things, God knows a persons needs and he also knows their desires and what is on their heart. If the heart is in the right place God does bless people with the desires of their heart.

We do not worship a cheapskate God! Sometimes people can give the impression that we do, but we worship a God of the immeasurably more.

Oh decisions, decisions !!!

[Kan]

Living like you do has certain attractions and practicality. 

Less things to worry about, less clutter.

Your style is definitely frugal, and would be a reflection of your mind set as well, so it is only natural for you to stall over the Q of a new computer, whereas other people would just splash out and buy one - it will save you time on the thing, because it's faster, after all time is money.

In the near future the old computer will pack it in, and you'll be caught without one you need for witnessing.

On the other hand you could wait till the old one dies and just buy a new one, by which time there will be even a better bargain the way things go.

Now you are back to square one - decisions, decisions. 

[blue gem]

Ps giving to others can involve finances, but we can also give with our time, talents, abilities, tools etc.

When I did get my new saxophone I said to God that I was not going to hang onto it too tightly as I recognised it as a gift from him.

A few months later that was tested when a person who plays the clarinet asked if she could possibly borrow my brand new very expensive soprano saxophone for a few days as she was wondering about getting one herself.

Well I remembered what I had prayed to God and I let her borrow it, then about a year after that I let one of the pastors sons borrow it to try it out for a week. (I did have some reservations about that as he was a typical teen). I have since borrowed it to others and I felt it has stopped me from treasuring it too much and helped me to keep things in perspective that we are not to store material treasures up.

[Keith]

I truly appreciate your comments, blue gem and Kan.  Sometimes it just helps me to "talk out loud" and hear other people's perspectives on a matter.

 

I honestly enjoy living as simply as I do.  I definitely have 99% less stress than most people since I only have myself, and my cat, to fend for.  Still, worry really is a choice that's made, isn't it?  I've just learned the hard way (as I seem to need to do with all of life's lessons) that it doesn't accomplish anything as to where not worrying bears good fruit.  Sorry.  Bunny trail. 

 

I can't deny that I want a new computer.  A new computer is like going to bed with clean sheets right after a shower!  And I rarely buy anything for myself.  I always pray over things I buy and they always seem to last a long time.  I figure if God can make the Israelite's clothes not wear out, He can do it for me, too!  (Another testimony... He honors those prayers for me!)

 

I'm not expecting God to answer my prayer about this computer right now.  I've never known Him to answer before the answer is needed.  It's just that I struggle with issues like this.  I honestly lean a little too heavily on NOT buying things for myself, which, I've been told can be an issue, too.  But, I'm a servant.  It's my nature to help others however I can, so I do give in more ways than just financially.  But, to spend $1,000+ on a computer when that money could go to aid missionaries who willingly risk their lives by going into Iran to preach the gospel because they truly love the Iranian people?  Souls or a new computer?  How is that answer not obvious?  Shouldn't I wait until I actually "need" a new computer instead of pre-empting the perceived need of a new one?

 

I'm really not stressing about this.  I just tend to over-think and analyze things; sometimes to the point of analysis paralysis and no choices get made at all.  When, in this situation, there isn't really a right or wrong answer.  As with many situations, it's more of a heart matter.  i.e., motives.

 

I'd be grateful for more insight from my brothers and sisters, though.  I'm not very wise about things like this.

[Keith]

Oh, and regarding your saxophone story, blue gem, that's exactly how I feel.  Stuff is stuff.  It's all temporary and on loan anyway.  If someone else breaks it, they break it.  Oh well.  And, since I don't think we're going to be here for another eight years for me to get full use of a new computer anyway...

 

That's why I appreciate your, Kan's, and other people's experiences and advice.  I'm too close to my own situation and could make an argument for either side of my situation. 

[The_Patriot21]

buy a new computer, donate the old one to someone who could use it!

[Kreyvic]

Prayer......my friend   That is where you begin! Always honor God first with your fruits of harvest / $ .

[Keith]

buy a new computer, donate the old one to someone who could use it!

Absolutely.  If I get a new computer, this one will go to the manager of my apartment building.  She's a single mom, working two jobs, and still on food stamps.  Her computer took its last ride and she needs a new one.  Since mine still works perfectly fine (an issue I'm wrestling with), it would be a good computer for her.  Then again, why not just buy her a new, inexpensive computer?  I'd still have money leftover to help others with.  (See how my mind works?  I'm an organized, detail-oriented person who's been called a "deep thinker" plenty of times.  It sounds funny, but it's a struggle whenever I enter into the thought process.)