stitchy Posted January 19, 2007 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 35 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 171 Content Per Day: 0.03 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/12/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/06/1986 Share Posted January 19, 2007 (edited) My self image issues are getting to me again. I feel so self conscious around other people, and I'm starting to feel like people who are thinner than me are better than I am. It's gotten to the point where I'm feeling guilty about eating again, unless it's something really good like vegetables or a piece of fruit or some yoghurt. Whenever I'm around others I'm uncomfortable because of how I look, which is stupid because I know they're not standing there thinking "This girl is so hideous, look at her, she needs to lose some weight". In fact I'm probably the only one thinking that about myself. But why? Why have I never been able to be fully okay with the way I am and how I look? It's such a terrible trap for me to be in. Am I too vain to be okay with how God made me? Am I so conceited that I HAVE to look 'perfect' to be happy? I mean I see other girls who are bigger than me, and I still feel like they're gorgeous and I'm disgusting. Why? What's worse is though I want so badly to be liked, if a person does like me I don't seem to accept it. Recently I learned from a friend that he's liked me for a while, and that's been playing on my mind a LOT lately because I keep thinking "Why? Why would someone like him like me? He's so cool and nice and I'm so unattractive". Despite the fact that he has stated clearly his feelings, I keep denying it in my head, or I think "He should like someone better, look at all the other girls out there he could want". What is wrong with me? Edited January 19, 2007 by stitchy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paperflower Posted January 19, 2007 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 12 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 91 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 06/26/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted January 19, 2007 I know that the tons of viewers who have no left no messages is not helping you either. So I will start. Has someone told you that you are this way or is it from simply looking at yourself and then some television show or model? Where did you first get the idea you were unattractive? In order for this guy to find you attractive he must see something beautful to his eyes. Men find things about a person that is attractive to them and them only, so you have something he likes. Do you sit and talk to him or just simply say you don't have time for him? Try sitting and talking and find how that feels to you. Do a game date. You bring a game you like, he brings a game he likes. Have fun laughing and playing. From there see how things go. You may just need to explore being around people who UPLIFT YOU. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest rtaylor Posted January 19, 2007 Share Posted January 19, 2007 My self image issues are getting to me again. I feel so self conscious around other people, and I'm starting to feel like people who are thinner than me are better than I am. It's gotten to the point where I'm feeling guilty about eating again, unless it's something really good like vegetables or a piece of fruit or some yoghurt. Whenever I'm around others I'm uncomfortable because of how I look, which is stupid because I know they're not standing there thinking "This girl is so hideous, look at her, she needs to lose some weight". In fact I'm probably the only one thinking that about myself. But why? Why have I never been able to be fully okay with the way I am and how I look? It's such a terrible trap for me to be in. Am I too vain to be okay with how God made me? Am I so conceited that I HAVE to look 'perfect' to be happy? I mean I see other girls who are bigger than me, and I still feel like they're gorgeous and I'm disgusting. Why? What's worse is though I want so badly to be liked, if a person does like me I don't seem to accept it. Recently I learned from a friend that he's liked me for a while, and that's been playing on my mind a LOT lately because I keep thinking "Why? Why would someone like him like me? He's so cool and nice and I'm so unattractive". Despite the fact that he has stated clearly his feelings, I keep denying it in my head, or I think "He should like someone better, look at all the other girls out there he could want". What is wrong with me? Never look where the devil's talking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iryssa Posted January 19, 2007 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 117 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 3,860 Content Per Day: 0.56 Reputation: 9 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/10/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 09/13/1984 Share Posted January 19, 2007 I know that the tons of viewers who have no left no messages is not helping you either. Hey, give us a break....it hasn't been THAT long since she posted Everyone has feelings of insecurity, some more than others, but everyone has them nonetheless. Audrey Hepburn spent her life not liking her face, not ever believing how beautiful everyone said she was...to this day she is one of the most celebrated beauties to hit Hollywood. *sigh* I wish I had a magic pill to give you to make you not feel like that...I wish I had one for every woman out there. The truth is, though, it won't heal overnight. It's not because you're too vain...don't accuse yourself of that... One thing I can assure you is that people AREN'T looking at you and thinking that you're hideous...I know you say you know that, but sometimes head knowledge just doesn't become heart knowledge right away...so here are two reasons you can use to convince your heart: 1. You're not hideous. You're BEAUTIFUL. I've seen your profile pic. 2. They're all too worried about how THEY look to think about a pimple on someone else's face, or some "imperfection" that no one actually sees but you (we all think we have those, by the way) Anyway...I may have something more helpful to say later...right now, though, I need to make sure it's actually something I practice or plan on practicing *rueful grin* I've struggled with this myself... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitedove4 Posted January 19, 2007 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 5 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 24 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/12/2007 Status: Offline Share Posted January 19, 2007 Hi, God says you are beautifully and wonderfully made......keep saying that to yourself because it is true. For a long time I thought I was unworthy of Gods love because I seen myself as a smoker....however God showed me through time that I am His wonderful precious daughter and smoking was an act not His identity for me. I am His precious daughter and sees me white as snow..He sees me as His bride. Dear sister don't let satan lie to you...read Gods love letter(bible) and He will tell you the truth about who you are in Him, Blessings, Cindy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stitchy Posted January 19, 2007 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 35 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 171 Content Per Day: 0.03 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/12/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/06/1986 Author Share Posted January 19, 2007 Thankyou everyone... You're right, Iryssa.. I have head knowledge but my heart just won't believe it. I think I first started feeling this way when I was around 11 or 12. I had some 'friends' at school who were quite horrible to me. I remember one day they decided to take it upon themselves to set me up with a boy. I had no idea what was going on, but they lead me outside, said 'this is her' and this guy (surrounded by a huge group of his friends) all went "eww!" and laughed at me. It was a pretty terrible year that year, I think that's possibly where all the self image issues started. And now, yeah, I do compare myself to the models and celebrities on TV. It's stupid. And I KNOW it's stupid, but I still can't seem to shake this struggle of mine. Thanks again everyone I love you all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leonard Posted January 19, 2007 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 115 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 8,281 Content Per Day: 1.12 Reputation: 249 Days Won: 3 Joined: 03/03/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/30/1955 Share Posted January 19, 2007 There is an old saying that goes: "You can't stop a bird from flying over your head, but you CAN keep him from building a nest in your hair." Thoughts will come to you, and you can't stop them. What you can do, is simply not give them a home. Replace them with what the Word of God says about you. And do this every time such thoughts come. May the Lord show you the right way. + Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ColleenLovesMischief Posted January 20, 2007 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 100 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,791 Content Per Day: 0.37 Reputation: 21 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/21/2003 Status: Offline Birthday: 06/13/1977 Share Posted January 20, 2007 Nothing wrong with you sweetie. Although I have to ask. Were you picked on at any point over your weight? I sure was and it still sticks with me as well. You need anything pm me. Colleen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shazza Posted January 20, 2007 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 29 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 526 Content Per Day: 0.07 Reputation: 2 Days Won: 0 Joined: 04/03/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/25/1965 Share Posted January 20, 2007 Stitchy, Our society has a lot to answer for in regard to womens body images. Have you seen how models look these days, absolutley terribly thin and gaunt? You are beautiful in God's sight and that is all that matters, the devil is the one telling you that you are unattractive and he will keep at it til you tell him to "leave town' Stichy for a minute look at yourself as God sees you What does God see??? He sees this beautiful person HE created in HIS own image!! We are our own worst critics, we beat ourselves up til we believe it. God commands us to look after the temple of the Holy Spirit in that we don't overeat but also don't undereat either. Eat a well balanced diet, and the occasional treat. I have been through what you are feeling so with the help of God you WILL overcome this. Remembering that your true beauty comes from within. Learn to love yourself as God loves you and we all love you our Sister in Christ here at Worthy. Shazza Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paperflower Posted January 20, 2007 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 12 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 91 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 06/26/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted January 20, 2007 I know that the tons of viewers who have no left no messages is not helping you either. Hey, give us a break....it hasn't been THAT long since she posted Everyone has feelings of insecurity, some more than others, but everyone has them nonetheless. Audrey Hepburn spent her life not liking her face, not ever believing how beautiful everyone said she was...to this day she is one of the most celebrated beauties to hit Hollywood. *sigh* I wish I had a magic pill to give you to make you not feel like that...I wish I had one for every woman out there. The truth is, though, it won't heal overnight. It's not because you're too vain...don't accuse yourself of that... One thing I can assure you is that people AREN'T looking at you and thinking that you're hideous...I know you say you know that, but sometimes head knowledge just doesn't become heart knowledge right away...so here are two reasons you can use to convince your heart: 1. You're not hideous. You're BEAUTIFUL. I've seen your profile pic. 2. They're all too worried about how THEY look to think about a pimple on someone else's face, or some "imperfection" that no one actually sees but you (we all think we have those, by the way) Anyway...I may have something more helpful to say later...right now, though, I need to make sure it's actually something I practice or plan on practicing *rueful grin* I've struggled with this myself... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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