NewToChrist

Yes I have been for a while now.

Ok so here's where I'm at. Most of you already know what I've been through, some more than others. But, recently my family has decided to desert me. After a miscarriage and losing the man I thought I loved who I'd been with for a long while and wanted to marry...he passed away. Now my family is saying my job isn't good enough. That I need to go to Job Corps and get out, or they will "give me a one way ride to the mission". Yes, I know they can't "force" my to go to Job Corps but I feel I am being strong armed into having no other option. They aren't giving me any time to save $ to get my own place just that every job I've had isn't good enough. THEY FORCED ME TO QUIT MY LAST JOB, after giving them nearly 80% of ALL the $ earned during it, AND letting them set up T.V services in MY name that THEY let go to collections three times!. Yet, this job (secretary for a senior living center $9.33/hr 35hrs a week) still isn't good enough. At least it's something! Should I stand my ground and hope they don't kick me out or give in to the controlling manipulative behavior and go to Job Corps which I'll never be happy with, then sue them or every penny that went to collections?....I see no guidance from the Lord on this I feel like I'm all alone contemplating the worst is how bad this is for me right now. My parents ultimatum is quit my apparently "dead end" job and go to Job Corps or "get out"...

thank you

Exodus 14:14 The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still. NLT

other one, I know what you mean believe me. I posted this for my own healing I did not mean for it to cause discomfort to you or anyone else. god bless

thanks guys. I like to tell a story with my writing. advise from my therapist, show where I was, and where I am going now. I'll post more later. But please pray for me as I am having some financial burdens dropped upon me...my depression is rearing back to get me through the anxiety of these things...ugh

Thank you. sorry i have been away for a while... I've lost 5 pounds! yippie! I got myself a hotel lastnight to be away from my family... parents getting a divorce so it was very..loud lastnight... my brother was crying outside and they didn't even care he had the guts to scream at them "stop fighting i hate it when you guys fight", my dad looked at him in a fit of anger and said " shut the **** up go outside and ******* go do something" so he did, i yelled i was getting a hotel and they didn't even blink! -.-

Thanks nebula, I lost 2 pounds this week so thats good. My issue is I used to struggle with Bulimia and Anorexic tendencies and my friend adam knows this so he is easing me into a healthier life but it is so hard to not binge when i feel bad, then purge when the food makes me feel worse... I am still learning though and take each grain of advise to heart and will put into action. thank you for the prayers.

I have been through some similar issues. being the only christian in my family. it can be hard feeling that way, as for your sister, i've been in her shoes, the whole running away part. she will come to her senses! I will be praying for you!

lil sis got rehomed to a very nice couple today so sweet they are and have a much bigger place for her so im sure she will be happy there. and i finished my first full days work yaay.

oh cool. didnt think of that! thanks!

How can I post pictures from my computer to my posts? (I took a pic of some things I made and would like to show you all) I copy paste and it doesn't work. I click the image button and it says url, how do i do that?

So 1- me and josh arent together anymore, long story but I had to tell my police friend adam on him as josh threatened someones life... mostly from his anti depressants i think but he needs some emotional help...pray for him 2- i cant lose weight my friend adam is helping me but its hard, the only thing that used to work for me is crash diets if you know what i mean...and i dont want to do that again! im so confused as to what to do. ive been trying to lose weight for months! im just so hurt...

Hey guys thanks for all the advise but the lil boy passed away sadly on the 24th, i hadnt been able to update this post til now, i did take him to the vet i was sick of watching him as he get worse.. the morning of the 23rd he wouldnt eat no matter how hard i tried, i did get KMR and he wouldnt take it not even from an eyedropper.. so i walked him in his box down to the vet and told them his symptoms that i didnt have the money but he needed help now! thankfully they were nice enough to take him in and after 2 hours of praying and waiting he passed away the vet said he was so cold his temp wouldnt even read. which is wierd cause id kept him on a small heating pad wrapped in a blanket, they also said he was really anemic like i had thought. said i had done good by trying to get fleas off him and the KMR but sometimes kittens just cant regulate their temp, along with being anemic there was nothing i could have done. But his sister and mom are very healthy and the lil girl is being rehomed tomorrow yay

thank you all. i just got word from shawn that alana has fully miscarried tonight and is sleeping now. now it is just a matter of the lord bringing them together to work through this for their young son noah.. he is only 6 months i think

Such a short time I held you as you grew God gave me you as a gift and I loved you even before I saw you the lord gave me more love in those 10 weeks then I have ever known before... may you rest peacefully in the arms of the angels shawn, alana... the lord is with you now and I will pray for you through this heartbreak!!

thanks guys, I am being patient, praying for him and he seems to be accepting it. smiling more when we hang out and texting me randomly saying "hi love" so im being patient with his heart still being in 2 seperate places... in the cage and still getting over his ex. but its getting better he wants me to get in the cage with him tomorrow and im scared lol. he said he would not hurt me but he is 6ft a solid 190lbs and im a shorty short short 5 ft 2 140lbs... im gonna get him tho, if anything I'll trip him and pin him in head lock haha

So, I'm kinda frustrated... Josh said he does like me and wants to go out but he isn't over his Ex yet (she left him which caused him to attempt suicide a few months ago) so I was shocked but told him I am very patient and can wait while he figure out what he needs to. He invited me to another fight yesterday, he got hurt I went to the hospital with him (he broke his nose) He is okay though, on the ride home I told him he looked goofy with the big bandage on his face which got him to laugh a little... he kissed my cheek before he got out but it's confusing...he says he wants to move on but wanting to and being ready to are two different things... pray for him, healing physically and spiritually. his poor nose is pretty bad.. but he won the fight!

So, lastnight on the ride home I told Josh how I felt, I just out right said it I turned off the radio and said "Okay, Josh I don't exactly know how you feel but I can't hold it in any more"... He looked at me weird but I continued with " Josh, you have been a great friend for a long time, I love that we can talk about anything but lately you've been really nervous and I know you like me and it's okay to not have the words. But, I do and I need to say this and if you don't want to hang out anymore then fine... Josh, I like you a lot and have for a while and I would really like to take this further, slowly but further".. I took a long breath and that man just smiled and took my hand... I sat there a bit purturbed but happy to have his hand in mine... and guess what!!! He kissed me good night when I dropped him off back home! I was soooooo speachless

Lol thanks Jacob, when Josh told me his kind-of-feelings, I asked him what it is he would like in a woman, he said "you have exactly what I'm looking for"..But then quickly turned back to his food.. I just smiled and watched him Lord knows I'm also nervous (been hurt bad before) so... I suppose taking things slow is best, I'm going at his pace. He likes to do MMA Fighting and he invited me to see him fight tonight in just a few hours. He said he would also teach me self defense and boxing, I believe he was flirting when he said "not all girls can punch you have pretty hands, you sure you dont want to break a nail?"...I punched him a good one and he laughed...I love his laugh! Gosh I'm just stuck as to what to say to him tonight (he isnt too talkative) and I don't want the car ride to be dead silence...I suppose the lord will provide my heart with the words he needs to hear. Pray for him also that he has a safe fight and doesn't get too hurt.. thanks

Sooo... I like...no REALLY like this guy.. his name is Josh and he is a Christian as well. We like the same kinds of everything and he even likes potatoe chips in his ham sammichs!! He has a passion to learn more in God (gave himself over to God in May) I've told him of my struggles and recent battle with food.. he understands! Thing is... he hasn't given any hint whether he likes me. He said I'm the first person in a long time to make him feel wanted, needed and he likes that but hasn't said if he likes me. Infact we haven't so much as touched skin. We went to the movies today and he didn't so much as ACCIDENTLY touch my hand...NOTHING! I think I should just tell him but I don't want to look like a idiot and lose atleast a friend...but I don't want to JUST be friends... Guys: why are men so blind? Women: what do you think I should do to not look like an idiot but also possibly save the friendship if I fail? thanks

Hey everyone I just wanted to say that I am opening my twitter and inbox here for anyone who needs prayer If you want, you can message me on twitter: @AprilJungbluth you guys here are like a family to me so I just want to help LOVE YA GUYS! xoxo

I am a man, and believe me, he is feeling the same. How does he tell you? He really wants to, just as you do, so you are both up the same creek without paddles. It's the fear of rejection that we fear most. Remember the things we fear the most have not happened yet! Think about it. The things we used to fear are in the past, and only the future lies ahead. So what do we actually fear? Fear itself..... Is God sending you Ben to better yourself? NO, no, no. Only you, through the Holy Spirit, and the word, can better yourself! Ben would be a nice addition in this walk, but he cannot better you! (He can make it more fun though...) Some things we do, we just have to do, without waiting on God when we are undecided. Pray about it, go and tell Ben you feel that he likes you, and you would like to see where this takes both of you. And then trust in the Lord, through prayer, that the relationship goes down the road you would wish..... Remember, if you are not living on the edge, you are taking up too much space.... Just do it! thank you all for the great advise, i would have done all of these things but i was sheepish and slow. HE BEAT ME TO THE PUNCH! he came to visit me and prayed for me for a long time, told me he liked me, had never felt love outside of christ and his own mother but is pretty sure it could be love he feels for me and before i could say anything he kissed me! not a huge adult kiss more like a school kid crush in 2nd grade by the swings kind of small but beautiful kiss. we both just sat on my bed for the longest time not saying anything til he opened my bible and started reading 1 John. i thought it was awkward until he read it outloud to me. we're not exactly sure where this will take us but we've hung out alot more since then, we havent kissed again ( i think due to mutual embarassment) but ive been alot happier, still alot of pain, but my general moods have been so much better. i think this is good for both of us. anyways, id better head out its almost midnight!!!

you ever feel like you're the only one? even though you know jesus and know that he loves you and wants only the best maybe you find yourself blaming god but not REALLY meaning to? then you pray til your heart bleeds for forgivness. I know I do even the best of us have those days we catch ourselves saying "why god, why today, why now" "what did i do to deserve this?" "take this pain away,it's much more then i can bare" but what keeps me going is my bible,i read as much as i can and the fact that jesus suffered much more then we as not only christians but as human beings could ever imagine and yet with his last breathe he committed his soul over to heaven and god and he said "father forgive them for they know not what they do" that is what i am learning to do to admit i am not perfect i mess up i say things that hurt even god and praying alone isnt enough for me i like to write letters to god wether im apologizing or praising Him. and i am reading more and more of my bible everyday before i was scared to read anything other than luke,john,matthew,and genesis. i dont know why,maybe i wasnt ready to REALLY learn but over the past month i've done alot of reading and it is helping me to WANT to know god more and WANT to change my life and WANT to get healthy!! and i WILL NOT give up on myself or on Gods love for me!

So theres this guy his name is Ben and he is everything I admire and I know he likes me but I can't tell him I like him too. I've put it to god many times but everytime I see ben I get all flustered and dizzy like a little schoolgirl. Its pathetic but idk what to do. with me being sick and not knowing everyday is a blessing and if god is sending me Ben to better myself and maybe even fall in love. how come i cant just step up and tell ben? i hate having to ask for help but i cant handle this one on my own, any advise?