You know this is a really hard topic for a lot of people to talk about. I have also wondered about this for a long time. The only thing that I could reasonably figure out is that maybe that in the death it could have saved a life, or maybe even taken a life. You never know how someone will turn out in the end. Bad influences or maybe god knew the outcome and took the child out the easy way. I have been talking to my dad quite a bit and he said that it is coming to the "end" of the age. He also told me that right now is not a good time to have a baby so maybe god thought the same....there are so many what if's but have you stopped to ask god himself? If you seek answers you should ask the creator. He would be the only one that could give you comfort and reasoning for your loss.
I am very sorry for your loss and I hope the best for you and your family. I pray that you find what you are looking for. Seek God.