Billiards Ball

Just replace saved in your paragraph with sanctification and you are correct. Saved and sanctified are too different things.

Yes, we ask. Once.

It doesn't matter whether a born again person sins once daily, thrice daily or once per decade. Salvation comes through JESUS CHRIST, not through our repentance, prayer, works or anything else. By the way, Christianity looked "weak" when Jesus died on the cross, wasn't that the Pharisees' point?

You are a good Christian if you don't sin daily. The Bible teaches that Christians, saved, born again, Heaven-bound Christians, sin. If salvation keeps a person from every sin/all sin, much of the New Testament makes no sense at all. Why would there be hundreds of NT verses admonishing "us", the "church", "we believers", etc. to avoid the "sin that so easily entangles US"? The problem is you don't understand salvation, a free gift, but feel we MUST repent to "earn" a free gift, which makes salvation a wage, not a gift. See Romans 4 for more.

Repentance leads to salvation. Repentance is to change one's mind that one cannot save oneself. Once I made the decision to rely upon Jesus, I was saved. Daily repentance "just to be sure" shows an incomplete trust in Jesus. One must trust in Jesus to be saved.

Sin should be repented of, but salvation is the work of Christ, not of our repentance, or prayer or humility or works. Please understand this, because, respectfully, to disagree could be to jeopardize salvation. None can boast in Heaven.

I was using an analogy, you don't need to say feelings cannot be hurt, because Heaven is a place without sin, a utopia, even choosing to not have feelings hurt could be a choice of pride, which is a sin! Most people, including unbelievers, reject sinless perfectionism. The good news is Christ died for sin then rose, not Christ died so we can struggle harder than before salvation to be less sinful.

You are mixing two concepts together. The woman was told "stop committing adultery." The Bible tells us what most Christian's already understand, sin will not be completely eradicated before the Rapture.

1. Your Bible study should focus on whether your repentance saves or whether Jesus saves 2. You take a lighter view of sin than I do, since sin to me is imperfection, I sin often and dont have time enough to repent enough if my repentance saves me 3. Careful, you have a Roman Catholic look at salvation there, not a biblical one

Again, you are 100% correct. That is why: 1) No one can now see God's face and live 2) The Father does not yet dwell with men 3) Christians are on Earth to do volunteer works and righteous works rather than disappearing from the Earth after being born again 4) Etc. I am saved, was saved, am being saved... towards the blessed hope when He comes in the future to take away His saints. The cross is not an imperfect gift, it paid my past sin when I didn't know Him and also, my future sin. "There remains no further sacrifice for sin." "It is finished."

An excellent question. Perfection is imputed, not earned. Just as Jesus died and rose to save, and our works do not save, Jesus died and rose to perfect us, apart from works. The timing is the issue, since we're not perfect/sinless now but after the Rapture: 1) Only God is morally perfect, including born again Christians 2) Imperfect people cannot live in an utopia (even hurting my feelings because you sin against conscience to argue with me makes Heaven not a utopia) 3) Transformation is needed 4) Born agains are partially transformed now, to see God "through a glass, darkly" 5) Born agains are more fully transformed (receive divine power to stop sinning against conscience) at the Rapture This is when Jesus "comes to save the saved," at the Rapture He takes us, perfects us, judges and rewards us!

"We" and "us" includes John the apostle. If Christians are utterly without sin, entire chapters of scripture like Hebrews 12, "run the race, throw off sin, God chastises sinful believers..." make no sense.

Jesus doesn't give burdensome, impossible goals. 1 John 1:8 teaches that Christians who claim sinless perfectionism are actually self-deceived, and are not born again Christians.

1 John 1:8 says, "If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us." Note very, very carefully, "If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us."

I think that is a logical thought, that it's adultery, but Jesus cannot mean all sin, as "Christians who say they have no sin lie".

In context, Jesus was likely talking about the sin of adultery, right? "You are saved now, you've trusted me for salvation, therefore, go, but commit adultery no more."

Understand what salvation IS. 1) No one except Jesus Christ is morally perfect 2) Only morally perfect people can live in utopia 3) Jesus died for our sin, guilt and shame, our imperfection, then rose forever, promising eternal life 4) People who stop trusting themselves to perfect themselves and instead trust Jesus's cross and resurrection, are saved 5) Christians REMAIN imperfect, but when they meet God, they receive of the divine power to become morally perfect, citizens of Heaven Your logical response: 1) Ensure you are saved, that you have indeed trusted Christ, not you, for salvation 2) If you haven't, do so now 3) Take a week off from trying to perfect yourself, or if you like, THE REST OF YOUR LIFE True, biblical change to YOU will come from the inside out, not from "trying to be Christian".

It's not really a dilemma, but you believe it is. You know who you should talk to about this problem? Jesus Christ.

It seems a bit harsh to ever answer "no" when a prayer is off? Do other parents who are good give their children all they ask of them? What about strangers? Proverbs says the prayer of the wicked is abominable. Try to think of three reasons why God wouldn't "deliver" good to a starving person, then re-ask your question, please.

...and you need to continue counseling, with a biblical counselor.

I would tell her, "I know people who are emotional, and they love to journal, I'm trying to be better understanding of my emotion by writing down my thoughts, and more faithful to your emotions by writing yours down, so I can meditate on them." Tell the counselor you would like to write down and hold accountable/care for BOTH your and her emotions and logic and see what the counselor says to your wife's reaction.

Respectfully, love is a choice, since it is a verb/an action/agape and not a mere feeling. One can choose today to love his spouse more strongly than before. The brother is humble and hurting. Love is not mere sex but biblically, withholding invites Satan into the marriage. Show empathy.

The best leaders are servants. Instead of "I insist you get back to work," you probably said, "Even though it's more work for me, I'm excited if you choose to go back to work, so that this stress of always watching the kids can come off," right? Just keep leading while using words and actions that are of serving. The counselor's firing should be a mutual decision--I bet there's a way you can phrase it and a way to sell a more biblical counselor to your spouse. You can also witness to the counselor with or without your spouse present and see where the current counselor is aligned with God. Part of marriage is to love the other person, not the grass-is-greener imaginary man who is "more emotional"--or even says, "let's live day by day and go with emotion". Here are suggestions: 1) You both put down the answers to marriage questions both ways. You write down what you think the logical solution is AND what her emotions tell her today/tomorrow, putting them both at the top of the paper with equal weight. Compare, contrast and learn--this is different than you both daydreaming about marriage to more logical or emotional people. God tends to put opposites in marriage so they don't destroy themselves and others! 2) You walk a mile in her shoes, dropping the analytical robot in you (in us!) and LIVE. Do something with or without your wife that involves emotion but not danger, like drunkenness. Go to a park for an hour and LISTEN to the animals and wind, and if you can hear Him--God, without dissecting. Take a long swim or a sauna or go to the beach without a todo list. LIVE. 3) Start saying to your wife things like, "My logical brain says X, but my gut says Y," and be a bit more emotion-based, so you learn, and so she sees you growing towards her.

1) You are entitled to the same peace as I have, "peace not like the world gives," that is, amazing peace and forgiveness, despite current circumstances. Plead for that urgently with God, today. 2) Marriages that start with "I settled for this marriage" can blossom into AMAZING marriages. 3) No one is forced to be a stay-at-home parent. Start there, either with her now, or in the next counseling session. "You said the stress of homemaking is hurting our marriage and adding to resentment for me, can we get you back out of the house and into the workforce for a while? Our marriage must be strong or our love for our children and wishes for their best get compromised." 4) Most counselors report that most/all couples come to them too late, when partners resent one another. Counseling comes after connection is lost. For couples with great connection/great love/great sex, the problems all magically are small. People go to counselors when they've fallen out of love and connection. Emphasize your desire to rebuild connection in counseling, and find a counselor who can help you both with this NEED. CONNECTION is the single greatest need in marriage, and even strong marriages with strong wives include wives who need frequent affirmation/touching/hugs/acts of service/all five love languages. 5) Sure she's confused, hurting. You've both done some things. Now let's make sure a) your counselor is born again, emphasizing the Word and forgiveness b) she and you don't substitute one idol (children, searching for self-identity) for another (marriage) and c) you move from pressing her "What's wrong? Why are you confused?" to leadership/headship "I want to solve your stress by getting you out of the house more/watching the kids more/getting you into the workplace/taking you on a vacation without the children". BE THAT MAN, THAT CHRISTIAN LEADER GUY. This plus a little time should work everything out!

Now you need accountability from her, then: "I'm open to a divorce but I need to know your grounds. 1) Were you ever in love with me? 2) If you were in love, did I do something that made you fall out of love, etc.?" Are you really open to divorce? No, biblically you are being true where she is not. However, since Jesus does allow divorce for adultery... you need to know what's happening, from her. A woman who is in love wants that napkin note. A woman who has decided she doesn't love the husband and doesn't wish to be wooed is either broken inside (why?) or cheating (why? when?). For her sake, she needs to get help. You need peace. You will behave rightly due to scripture, but scripture and her faith/lack of believing faith have nothing to do with the marriage bed and marriage peace being held in honor by all. Once you know what is happening, you can decide to 1) keep the marriage going for the kids and for God's will 2) decide whether you should be spending money on counseling for you only and not wasting it her way (!), etc.