believeinHim

A long long time ago I was at church regularly. I get confused, and I am uncertain of the values of this one, but I can tell you from what I gather, If he has them, I don't think he is listening. I joined a traditional ladies group on Facebook, but it's just a group. I haven't added anyone yet. If I were functional, this would be preferable because I don't like to be around people very much. My mom keeps up with the politics because of me and my disability. Unfortunately, she also tries to teach me that some movies are 'love stories based on love and redemption', and says she watched it, 'on purpose', To see, 'what those' types of Christians had to say about it. She still insists it's a love story. My dad played chess. Now he sits in front of his computer all of the time, even when he is not working. I am pretty much the one in need, lol, It's because one of them has the word, 'chick' on the end of it, and the other one is a more conservative one. This friend didn't email me back at the more conservative one.

Well, Yes, This, And then also as Mark Gungor says, as well. I don't know if you've heard of him.

I went to church a long time ago, but I was volunteering in the worship team because I was trying to do music for a living. Long story short, Musicians at church can be dangerous, Too! This was especially true after the junior high band dissolved, and I had to move on to the high school. I am very influenced by the stuff my parents bring in to the house. I do not have a car, and I am having a hard time getting to the kind of church I want to go to. We are in the process of moving, and my mom mentioned in a very passive manor about maybe having more time for church on Sunday mornings if my dad has less yardwork, But, they do not want to go to a small church. Every time we end up at church, they end up at a mega church. Every time. I do not have any desire to be at mega churches anymore. I do not drive, do not have a car. I am on Disability, and my parents isolate and watch modern entertainment. I *Have* been overspending, and at this point it might be a Bipolar symptom. Even if I wasn't I am on disability, so it's not likely I can afford a car. But, even if I could, they want to downsize the garage to one car, anyway. I am kind of stuck at home, unless I wanna take a scooter to church on Sunday mornings, is my only option at this point. The church that I want to go to, they expect the women to dress nice and wear dresses to church, etc. They dress up on Sunday mornings. I don't know how to ride a scooter in a dress. Lol. I am constantly drained from medications, and not sleeping without them. It's hard for me to get to places in the mornings. My parents are very anti social. They like to spend time with each other. But, I feel like this leads to binge watching secular entertainment all of the time, and they think it's OK with God. They think it's OK. It is the only thing I hear 24~7, she sleeps with it on. I don't hear it at night, but occasionally will hear it in the background.

My Consumer Cellular Link II is not connected to the internet, but is no longer being sold from them. I have had it for a few years, I think. As a millennial, I am expected to text my millennials more often than not. Also, as a millennial i am expected to text them in a less conservative way. As a conservative millennial, it is a constant push pull, To want to be around your peers, but expected to behave a certain way. I have been requested to never text some again, or ignored and ghosted, several times.

I suggest a cheaper cell phone plan, so you can control how many texting you get and stuff like that. There is no such thing as 'unlimited' anything. If you have unlimited texting, you will be limited by the people that you text. In order to deter the temptation, and the gravitational pull, I keep my texting shut off on one phone, and a build your own plan on another. You can dm me if you have questions. With a landline, there is no capability of being caught in an unwanted text, coming from either direction! I am less likely to call someone, than I am to text them! A text can get in to more trouble than a call!

This is a major red flag, @Retrobyter. Red flags as female friends are drawn to me. Very, Red flags as female friends are drawn to me. The only female friends who respond on a regular basis, are red flag female friends! When it comes to the men, it is similar, in a different way. Forward, mouthy, abusive women are drawn to me when it comes to female friends. In the past, passive, timid men would come after me, or someone in a red flag in the other way. Either passive, neglectful men, or men who would end up abusing me in some way, more than likely. I am looking for feminine, women, and strong, Christian, Dominant men! This is what I am looking for. *Kissy Face Emoji*. My best female friend pulls away from me when I told her about an email, as well as, she is a red flag. She is definitely, a red flag! She wants to stay, a red flag! I think! She wants to stay a red flag, I think. We'll see going forward, but she is still pulling away from a specific email address. The email in which she prefers is proof of that! When I gave her my alternative email address, she pulled away from me. She wants to stay a red flag!

I do not think that I could handle the THC, and on anti psychotics, I do not think this would be wise, but I took an ever so small tiny nibble out of a CBD gummies, and it was, well, weird. It relaxed all of my muscles, but it did have the scary side effect of slowing my breathing down. When I mean I took an ever so small tiny nibble, I mean I took an ever so small tiny nibble. I also got some 300mg CBD cream that I am mixing with essential oils, and I can't get the one that I got anymore, it is sold out! Walgreens will not ship theirs to here, and I can not find any others that are of that low dose, 400mg or less! The CBD cream mixed with essential oils seems to be the safest thing to me, and I can not find anymore that is that low dose, and Walgreens will not ship theirs to here! I do not recommend trying this stuff without talking to your Doctor first! And I have not, and will still not go for anything with THC .

Well, The other problem is, is I keep getting incompatible, Friendships that I don't really want to be friends with. Friends I'm not attracted to, Or friends that I don't want. Friends that is isn't mutual, FOR ME. I can't get any mutual friendships, they are all unreciprocated friendships.

Whew, George! I thought Worthy had gone under these past couple of days! I mean, I know I have issues, But the internet as a whole felt very, very vulnerable these past few days! Very vulnerable these past few days!

The older I get, the more minimalist I become. I really do not like to be surrounded by too many things. Traveling is also not only exhausting to me, It is also scary to me. Especially travel by air. I could probably only make it on the road for a couple of weeks before being burned out. I need my sleep. I need my sleep, and I want a husband, and my own family. I am definitely a stay in one place kind of girl, and I definitely don't have an eye for the finer things in life. It all seems overwhelming to me. Overwhelming, and exhausting. I like plastic furniture on wheels, and it doesn't bother me. I don't think it looks bad. I just care about how easily it will be cleaned, by me!

To me, All of that sounds exhausting, and unpleasant anyway. Traveling too much is exhausting for me. I can't drink, alcohol doesn't mix well for me. I have never liked it. Fancy places, like how fancy? Like so fancy, that it is like overwhelmingingly fancy? One of my favorites things to be surrounded by is old fashioned art, and old fashioned 60's stuff. I mean, sure, I guess a castle would be nice, Until it needs to be cleaned. Lol. Honestly, if I lived in a castle I'd be downstairs in one room all of the time in an oversized t shirt, and some 95~5 blend cotton leggings. The only thing I don't have, that I want, is a husband, that I want, and my own family. I can't seem to get that anywhere. I don't like eating in front of people, I prefer to eat at home, and so all of public stuff requires you to have to be ok with public stuff. I am not a public kinda gal.

The entire world, Can not stop, Because someone did something to irritate someone else, Especially if it wasn't intentional! I can not function like that, Under normal circumstances !

I have a hard time believing anyone wants to hear from me. I feel like a burden, and like I am always wrong about something. I have a hard time believing any of my friends like me, Or want to be around me, or that they are even my friends. Prayers.

I have an especially difficult time accepting women for tattoos, And promoting tattoos for women. Think, Anything a woman wears out or announces in public, any man or any other woman now knows where to go, where you might go, Your interests etc, Where you might go to or where you might be. I don't think men are ever intimidated by us. Unless we are armed. This is for our protection.

It sounds like your parents are doing you right by being concerned about your marital status. I will pray for all involved.

It's not his tattoos I like, @farouk, it's him. Ideally he wouldn't come with them. I'm not going to hold it against him that he has them now. I'll hold something else against him, but I don't know about that.

And same for women. I like to see a woman's arms. The feminine definition of her arms. Even on a bigger woman, I like to see a woman's arms. Lol.

Another reason why I don't like tattoos, is because I like to see a man's arms. Lol. I like to see his arms, I like to see his muscles, even if he is a smaller guy, I like to see his arms. Lol. They do look better on men, but I like to see his arms. I don't want them covered up. Lol.

@The Barbarian, Sorry. I watched the DVD. I know the issue you have. At least, I think I know the issue you have. I think I know the issue a lot of people have. I watched the DVD. Sorry.

@farouk, I got an advertisements for a microblading eyebrow pencil that looks promising, So I will not be needing to tattoo over the scar above my right eyebrow. Don't know if that is all attached to my computer or not, But it just came up for me recently on Twitter.

I have no problem with CBD oil, or CBD cream. Nor with CBD gummies, either. I also take several of my own medications.

There was some severe differences in political opinions. With me being way more conservative. It dissolved in to insults, and attacking my appearance. Then it dissolved in to them thinking I used someone else's picture. Then it was almost into threats, Which I had a bad dream about later in life. To which the guy that I liked at the time, Did NOT protect me!!!

Well, I do wear makeup, And I used to apply it pretty liberally in the past. I have a picture from my mid to later twenties, When my hair wasn't quite so thick anymore up on here, But that was a bit older then. Later twenties,. I still have just about the same amount of hair , Trying to focus on eating healthy, and keeping my body in shape. I would like to believe you that they thought that, But I haven't had any pursuits, or any compliments from anyone that I actually want. If a woman can get dates, and men pursuing her, It really doesn't mean anything unless she wants them back. So, I have a really hard time believing that, especially the older I get. It dissolved in to insults and threats due to political opinions, With me being way more conservative.

He works at the grocery store. Loll. I haven't spoken to him, but I know that he recognizes my family.

I was texting with this guy in this classical guitar class in community college, and two semesters later I ended up failing music theory. I don't know if he was the cause, but he certainly was a distraction. The only thing I have to show from it is a C in music theory, and a B in Aural Perception. He then later, On Facebook, Suggested I get a theory book and stay home. Oddly enough, some of the best life advice given to me have been given to me by a man being a jerk to me. Or plural, if you must.