integrity

Amen Francesco! I know all you say is true. Amen again, God comes nearly instantly in our most desperate pleas. what a wonderful God we serve. Honestly I think I'm grateful for this trial...because feeling His love like that, so real, it's worth more than anything else.

Marilyn, God bless you for your kind words ♡ every but of it is true. Yesterday, after finding out our deadline for the house was gon a be extended for another month because of the city, I was distraught beyond belief. I cried the whole day. I thought Christmas we would be in our own home, and I would be celebrating it with just my dear husband and 3 babies. But it's not to be, closer to February is most likely. I prayed so hard that night, and I felt the embrace of Jesus, I cannot explain it. I heard inside,as I cried and anguished, "You are loved." And I kept hearing them be repeated, those words until I stopped what i was saying and accepted them. And I felt those words with such conviction, boldness, as if Jesus was saying I am telling you truth, take it. I didnt want to stand up from my knees. I wanted to pray all night, just to feel that warmth that embrace that no human can ever fill for me. So I thanked Him for this trial, that I got to feel His love again. And how wonderful it is, to be completely known and still completely and wholly loved. thank you for your words, I am going to screen shot it and save them. Practice those lines. You are right if I do not call her out on it, she will never stop.

JohnD, you are giving excellent advice. this has actually been on my heart for a few days now now, with her undeniable arrogance, I cant kee qiuet anymore. I know by the end of this ordeal, I will have told her, honestly, what I will tolerate from her. And I will pray exactly that. even while we have to live under the same roof. that God keeps her nasty words away from my heart. I'm praying for wisdoms and for God to take away my anger/hurt, so I can tell her what need sto be said and not sin. It is at the front of my mind and I know it needs to happen.

I am reading through all of the messages, and some really good advice has been given...but yours is the only thing I can manage. I dont want ti try to figure it out on my own...it gets really painful and a lot of anger if I try to understand why she treats me the way she does. I will just hand it over to God, every last bit of it. I know I can lean on God and if I trust Him to heal me, He has promised to not let down those who depend on Him. I want to be better. Not for me but for my kids. If they can see me standing up for myself, but in a godly way they will know I'm not a hypocrite. thank you for this obvious advice. I needed to hear it again.

I appreciate your comment. I dont know if I care enough about what she thinks of me. It just hurts me, but I don't even want to be liked by her anymore.

Thank you for commenting logostician your post cheered me up. Its first for me, being disliked. Because I was always known by everyone in my community as kind and good. But apparently that means nothing, people can dislike you for no reason. I am not perfect. I have yelled at my children. And I spank them if they do something too naughty. I've been told by her so many hurtful things, I want nothing to do with her. Because she sees no wrongdoing, she will go to church after berating me and partake in communion. That's how I know she doesnt see me as anything of value. My husbna loves me and cherishes me, but I feel bad that I dont want to have a relationship with his mother. She is awful to me. I dont knoe, sometimes I think God, if you consider her good, I dont see how You can be trusted. I dont want to repeat the mean things shes said. And I think satan totally is using her to disrupt the peace in our household. But with Gods help, we wul be out by January. And I can say good riddance to her.

I think the same thing too brother. But because I am her sons wife, and not educated like her own daughter or other daughter in law I am not respected at all by her. She has done many things and said many things that makes me never want to forgive her and hurt her just so she can feel what shes made me feel. But i love Jesus and I dont ewant to disappoint the Father. she hears things in church (sermons) and will tell me that I needed to hear it. oh I love listening to sermons, but not when she thinks it's for me and not for her. because shes holy and I'm dirt. idk. i dont even know how to approach this issue. In my heart. I dont want to solve it with her. She dislikes me because I'm me. No one else has ever disliked me. I try to be humble, and kind because I am an empathetic person by nature. Anywho I said I posted before about my issue with the mil specifically and I dont want yo detail the hows of our arrangement to much. But the point is this situation is not my husbands and mine fault. I wouldve never moved in with them voluntarily. I guess because I am having such a hard time accepting that someone dislikes me, a fellow christian no doubt. And unjustly so. Idk how to reconcile that in my heart. Its toxic, I dont want to interact with her. I wish her well but after we move out I want nothing to do with her really. And I need help saying that I guess.

They broke agreement anf moved in with us without asking our consent. At any rate I am very tolerant towards them. We wouldn't be in this situation if it wasnt for their disrespect of us as adults.

Than you imagine growing up. I got married really young, had kids really fast, and I am happy in marriage but I'm just struggling. Idk maybe this should go on the prayer board, but i wonder if this is just a long adjustment period for me, and does everyone feel like i do once in their life. maybe there is something wrong with me. My main problem right now is (not our fault,I posters a out this on here) are my inlaws. We will be out in a month or 2, but I dont know how to make it until then. My question is this...how to get over unfair judgement /rejection? I dont wish and harm on her, I just want to be left alone. I know I still have years on this earth, and there are more trials to come. I just feel so weak right now. Almost like I dont care anymore.

8 I think drafido, that the only way you can describe that behavior is someone having lack of control over their anger/annoyance. Doesnt necessarily mean someone is mentally I'll or whatever. My mom was that way too. She would never ket someone get away with harming us in any way, but she didnt realize how abusive she was. And still doesnt think she was. Her mentality was I'm your mom, I have it rough you guys are annoying so I can flip out. She would defend me if she saw my older siblings bothering me. And she didnt let our dad discipline us most of the time because she was afraid he would hurt us. But my dad was not abusive at all. He never lost his cool on any of us like she lost it with me. So to answer your question I think your dad just lost his composure with your behavior. (You're not at fault, parents are always responsible for their actions).

You are right you have said exactly what I understand to be true. My moms repeated daily neglect, lack of love, angry outbursts that were both verbal and physically abusive...she was responsible but I do not blame her. She was stressed a lot, and I unfortunately got the brunt of it. I understand how stressed she must have been. Also not everyone is meant to be a mother of a lot of children, she clearly was doing it because of "christian duty" but it was not her passion at all. Anyways I agree with you. Thank you for the insight and the biblical wisdom! I will read on that and meditate on those scriptures. Be blessed!

I am so grateful for your reply! May God bless you and protect you, I am sorry for everything you went through. It is wonderful to hear that you were able to come to God and find healing, praise God. It has been a bit hurtful, these comments that people have posted. Assuming I am blaming God and using some weird blame game. I am not, and this is why I will not just bring it up in church. In my personal life I have tried to talk about it with people. Everyone goes silent and looks away. Like it's some inconvenient truth, but in the same breath they say children are a blessing from the Lors, He has a special place in His heart for them. And amen!! He surely does, I know because He saw me, and guided me as far back as my memory goes . I couldn't figure out how to word this post maybe. But that's you have found the words for me...I am appalled just as I came here I know people will do in real life. I ask a question, that I never hear an answer to in church, about the neglected unloved children. They will say how fmdare you blame God? It's His will, basically what has been repeated here by a few posters. I mean what on earth is that? I am asking because I KNOW God is good so what are we to do with this horrible thing that satan has been doing for centuries...and the church been ignoring or putting on low priority? That's why I said I have no desire to continue talking with a certain poster. And then people telling me to stop fighting. No this person was no help at all. I wasnt going to keep arguing. It is saddening to see how people lack empathy and speak in such a condescending way. I have greatly struggled for the past 5 years as soon as I became a mother myself. My mother in law dislikes me, my own mother sees no wrong in what she did, so I feel very cur off from them. I talk with them and am polite and loving, but I feel emotionallycut off from them in the sense that I cannot view them as mentors to me or someone who loves me enough to answer these questions or at least help me navigate this. And what motivates this question is to be able to heal myself, because I want to raise my own children with love, and to be able to help other children eventually. I feel alone in this so I reached out. I'm not looking for apologies, I just wanted to be understood. Again you gave some wonderful tips and made some true points. It should be talked about at church so we can all pray for it.we shouldn't care only about our little circle. I will pray for God to put it in the minds and hearts of my church. God bless you, you have given me words for what I could not say. You are the only person in this thread that answered my actual questions w ithout judging me and assuming I was blaming God.

Yep I asked you to clarify at least once. If you talk in a way that is unclear on purpose that's your problem. Either way, I think you need to work on your communication skills because you come across as arrogant and purposely misleading. Anyways I have no desire to interact with you further, I am going through some painful stuffe right now, I dont have time for your mental gymnastics. Be blessed. ETA...am I to understand that you think I am blaming you for something? I'm not. Like I said, I dont want to talk to you any longer, so this is my last reply to you.

For the record I dont think anyone here abused, neglected, or neither thinks their perpetrator cant the forgiven. The problem lies with unrepentant perpetrators. What they are gonna ask God for forgiveness and heaven and Hes going to say yeah sure. No. If they dont repent they wont be forgiven from God.

And to those thinking I posted this to blame God, I did not. Some of these posts it starts sounding like that's what is being insinuated, but I asked thos question because frankly the platitude of oh its Gods will is not enough for me. And a lot of Christians in my life clearly dont see the problem or fine line between treating your kids correctly and not. Anyways I'm sick of Christians that read the bible and mistreating their kids and considering themselves holy or good Christian's.