rockswillcryout

I can see where you can make the connection. Afer all, intense pain in something that can sometime take us beyond ourselves (perhaps as a way of coping, because the pain is too great?). Maybe it's a response to our Creator - the one who created our bodies, reaching out. In fasting, the hungry becomes intense, and when you choose not to ease that pain with food, you pray. You spend time in communion with the Lord in order to help ease the pain you are feeling. Seems to me that there is a connection of some sort.

You go girl! Do what God has called you to do!

Yes, he does! I think he also communicates with us through other people - whether it's friends, family, pastors, teachers... I think he also speaks to us when we seek him, in prayer time, worship time or whatever. And it's such a blessing!

Have you tried simply telling her it offends you? And asking her nicely to tone it down when you're around? I guess that's what I would do.

I think it depends on what you mean by challenge. To challenge something God has done or allowed to happened, to me, is wrong. But to challenge God to work in your life - to challenge him change you to make you more like Jesus? Seems perfectly acceptable to me. Challenge is not just about a battle of wits. To me, a challenge can be a positive way of seeing what can be done in your life - and to see what you can do with God's help. For example, I challenged myself to be more disciplined in my devotional time this year. Does that make sense?

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine who emphatically believes we should never have any regrets. Their point being, looking back and regretting something you did or said won't help you move forward with your life. My reponse was this: While regret can become burdensome, if we are not able to look at the bad choices we make with a feeling of regret, we may not learn from them. To me, I'm glad I regret things I do, because it reminds me of what not to do next time. But I think there is something to be said about not looking back and berating yourself for your screws ups. Where is the line? The line between "burdensome regret" and "lesson well-learned"?

That's a good way of putting it LadyC! This is how it's been explained to me. Just as there may not be one exact plan for your life - meaning you can do many different things, and no matter what they are, God is pleased if you are honoring him - such it is with marriage. Imagine a box. Imagine inside that box are all the characteristics of a Godly man or woman. God will be pleased with your choice as long as that person has those charateristics inside that box. There are many people out there who have those charateristics - the rest of it is just superficial, outside stuff. Such as what kind of a job they have, what there family is like, where htey live, ect, ect. Does that make sense? I'm sorry I'm not explaining it very well, I know...but I know what I mean.

I have not performed a binding, but have witnessed it. I have felt Satin's attack on my team while on a missions trip, and that is where the binding occured. I have no doubt about the attack, or that the binding was successful. The attacks kept coming the next day...but after that, we did not experience any. The attacks were extremely difficult and exhausting, but a valuable learning experience for me.

Hi Nebula! I know several... (I'm one of those weird music people) More contemporary in sound... Celebrate Jesus Come and See, Go and Tell More traditional... Behold the Lamb Christ Arose Christ the Lord is Risen Today I love Arise My Love...great song.

Well...aren't you the fountain of info! I knew as much, I wasn't just wondering if the connection was something I missed. ...so, how've you been, my dear brother in Christ?

I've read the story many times, but I never made the connection. Was Mary Magdalene the "woman caught in sin"? The movie "The Passion of Jesus Christ" suggests it - and I was just wondering if Gibson was taking a liberty with scripture there, or if there is biblical proof somewhere that they are one and the same. It certainly is possible that even if they aren't one and the same, Mary Magdalene may have been saved from stoning by Jesus, and it's just not recorded in scripture. I know it's not a big deal, but I was just curious if anyone knew more info. Thanks. :upsided: ----I love this smilie

John, Mike reminds me of a few people I know that understand Christianity, but choose to reject it (not because of doctrine, but because of humans.) That's sad, but it's reality. In a sense, they are almost like drug addicts - they know the risks and facts, but don't really care. They will only change when they are ready to change. But I don't want to underestimate the power of the Holy Spirit, either. Since he obviously enjoys being around you, maybe you could make an effort to include more of your Christian friends to give him more good examples to see. Perhaps these friends you can invite to golf with you and Mike, and maybe you can have a small dinner party and invite Mike and Dawn. This may give them a chance to be around more Christians like you - and may in a subtle way, help change his mind. If you like to read, there is a really good book on this subject "Speaking of Jesus" by J. Mack Stiles. It was a worthwhile read to me, perhaps it can help you as well. I wish you all the best.

Neb - you have a way of cutting to the chase like no one else. Next time I need to explain why I do what I do to a man, that is what will come out of my mouth. :t:

A friend of mine from college went into a jewelry store to look for a gold necklace with a cross on it. She conveyed this to the salesperson, who then replied "Do you want a plain one or the kind with the little man hanging on it?"

But does he feel the same about me? Well, if I knew the answer to that question, I probably wouldn't have posted in the first place. Does he want to please and impress me? Yes, he does. He's told me that. I have no idea what type of girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with. So, I don't know if I fit the bill or not. And I'm not sure if that's relevant in my situation. I feel the way I feel. And I have no idea how he feels. That's why I'm in this predicament - one I'd like to get out of ASAP. And one I'm resigned to suffering in silence, it seems. i would never want to be with a guy who would expect me to dress differently or be more athletic. Though I think it's normal for everyone to feel that way towards another person they have a crush on, I don't think it's the basis for a good relationship. But it IS still a normal feeling. Does that answer your questions?

Hi Nebula. I haven't been around the board too much - seems like there are more and more posts from people. I'm really grateful for that. And I wanted to answer this question because I think it's important. I first met him around four years ago. We worked together, and could never really be close friends. I have since changed jobs and things are progressing as a normal friendship would, without all that work stuff getting in the way. When I first met him, I was so worried what he thought of me and started changing things in myself that I thought would make him like me more. Then I had a long conversation with my pastor about that, because I was worried I was loosing part of myself, and here was his answer. He said that it's never wrong to change things about yourself if they are things that should be changed, i.e, things that God would see as favorable, things that needed to be changed (not always something sin-related, but other things as well). He used this example: his wife loves quilts. He doesn't really care to much for them. But he goes with her to quilt shows and such, because it's something she loves and he wanted to learn to appreciate it. It also allowed him to spend more time with her. He wanted to share that part of her life. So then I started to think about the things I was changed about myself. And the many parts about me that I was changing because of him were all really good things. Things that needed to be changed, things that God wanted to see changed in my life, but I never did until I met this guy. In the words of Jack Nicholson "You make me want to be a better man." Only I was just becoming a better person, a better woman, a better Christan. I still have an awful long way to go, but this guy made me want to change and the change was good. And now, I am so comfortable around him. I can be silly, serious, fun and goofy, and he doesn't care. We just have fun together. And what's so weird is that he never would ask me to change. He accepts people for who they are. He is never judgemental of his friends. But because of who he is, he made me want to be better.

Nebula... Yes, you are understanding this right. He has a girlfriend (she moved away a year ago, about 5 hours away from here) and he might be breaking up with her. I'm not holding my breath...okay, well, maybe I am. Sometimes he feels like an addiction. I distance myself from him, he pursues me and I keep going back. I'm not doing a very good job of staying strong in this area. I rarely initiate with him (may once or twice in the last couple of years) and to me, that's sends a message to him. But like you said...maybe he doesn't have a clue. And it's not that he isn't respecting my request (as rmj7 said and btw, rmj7 is a really cool guy!) because I haven't come out and asked for distance. How can I without telling him how I feel? He has said to me that he knows when I pulling away, and he figures I will tell him why whenever I'm ready. I just never have. So then things get back to normal again because he's the kind of guy who assumes a girl's problem can be solved with humor, so he just spend his energy making me laugh and then he thinks things are okay. I've written these two questions down - I will keep them close to me and continue to ask them as I proceed with this. :wow: That is simply the most beautiful thing I've ever read. I will let the Lord have my heart again. Because I'm afraid I've given too much of it to this guy. Part of me feels like these last four years of knowing him were just preparing me for what's going to happen next. It will most likely be a broken heart, but there isn't anything I can do about that. I just don't want it to be a broken heart. So, honestly I still feel stuck. Okay - I need distance myself from him. That I know. But since I've tried this before and it hasn't worked, I'm still stuck on what to do to keep this from happening all over again. Grrrrr. Why does this have to be so frustrating? :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer :prayer That's what I need to do.

Okay - to clarifiy some things: 1.) It's not that I don't think men and women CAN be friends. Of course they can. My concern is, "How good of an idea is it?" 2.) I have no intention of telling this guy how I feel about him. Unless he initiates it, he will never know how I feel. I'm just not brave enough to tell him, not do I think it's a good idea. As far as I'm concerned, a man has no right to know how a women feels about him until he has told her how he feels. So the fact that he's taken is a non issue to me. 3.) I would never marry a man who I wasn't friends with. Marrying your best friend is a great idea. But when you start with the boundry of "just friends" and feelings change, how should the situation be handled? My issue is that I have feelings for a man that I'm pretty sure doesn't have the same feelings for me. But we have an established friendship and I honestly hate living this lie. This lie that we're "just friends and I'm okay with that." rmj7... can you clarify what you meant by this? "I hope you're not taking your close friendship with your friend and making it into something it's not because you don't believe guys and gals just can't be friends. That's crazy! That's where the "play brother" or "play sister" comes into view." Well, besides a few slightly harsh posts, I do appreciate this insight. (Especially nebula (btw, I have read "I Kissed Dating Goodbye") and freakinrager_03) Perhaps only those who have been in this situation can understand this trauma I'm going through now. FYI, for those of you who advised I distance myself from him, I've tried that. He keeps pursuing me. A lot.

This is a topic I've debated and debated with family and friends alike. Should men and women be friends? I'm talking about a single man and a single woman. I know they CAN be friends, but is it a good idea? Eliabeth Elliot (a woman I admire very much) says they shouldn't be friends because ultimately one will end up being hurt. And also that the intimacy one has with a friend you've known for a long time should not be shared with a member of the opposite sex outside the confines of marriage. What she says makes sense. And I agree. Here is my problem. I have this very close friend (of the oppostie sex), we've known each other for four years, and I don't think it's a good idea for us to be friends now. I know it's not a good idea because I'm falling in love with him. (We worked together for several years, so we obviously couldn't date then. I just got a new job eariler this year and now we are growing extremely close. He is dating someone now, and yet he tells me he's thinking of breaking up with her.) Outside of the complicated nature of our relationship, the fact is, I just know it's not a good idea for us to remain friends right now. (Even though I hate the thought of not being his friend.) Whether or not he has feelings for me doesn't matter at this point. What matters is that it's not good for me to be friends with him. And that I am taking Eliabeth Elliot's book "Quest for Love" seriously. So, it's time to distance myself. How do I handle this situation? How do I tell him this without revealing how I feel? Or should I even do this?

SM2003, Wow. You situation sounds difficult and I'm not sure I will be able to help, but I feel the need to share this with you. I used to work at a publishing company that was one great big soap opera. Lots of stuff like you described would go on and it's hard not to get sucked up into it. I mean, work is a significant part of your life and it's nearly impossible to not let it affect you as muich as it does. While I never went through a situation like yours, I've had very similar feelings of deception, back-stabbing, hurt, and the hypocrisy...I've definately been there. It went on for 4 years and this became my way of dealing with it: 1.) I kept my work relationships at work. This was epecially hard because I am single and there aren't a lot of other good places to meet friends. While iI made good friends in other areas of the company, the collegues I came into direct contact with, I made a point to only see them during work hours and at the company Christmas party. It didn't happen that way at first, but it got bad enough, that in order to keep my sanity, I had to sever some ties. 2.) I kept to myself at work, didn't pay attention to what was going on in the lives of the people I worked with. (I mean, of course I knew about important family things, like births, deaths, sickness, etc) but anything intensely personal - I kept out of that. It helped me not to get sucked back into to the lives of the negative people who hurt me in the first place. 3.) I prayed and waited and found another job. It took a while, but God sent me to the right place. I have no doubt. All the negative feelings about work went away...and I rediscovered who I was. Granted, you are always going to work with people like this, but there are ways to keep it professional without it seeming like you don't care. God bless. I hope this is resolved with you soon!

nebula, Thank you for sharing your experience. While I do not know where my friend's heart is, or how she will react if I do send her a letter, it is good to know there is a chance she may feel concern for my feelings-as you did with your friend. We women are like waves and I think I may have hit my low in this situation. At least, I think. That's probably why I am at this point - wanting to resolve the issue, put it behind me and forget about. This is too long to have these almost bitter feelings. It hurts to know this has hardened my heart. Your advice was pratical and very useful. And I had tears welling up as I read it. Your honesty and eloquance is greatly appreciated. One last thing, though... you said: "Then when you are at peace about how the letter is worded, and the desire for reconciliation still burns within you, then send the letter, and pray for grace on your friend to receive it with an open heart." This is a good point. I'm not sure I have a burning desire for reconciliation. Right now, all I want is for her to know that her words are hurtful and I want her to consider that if she is still doing what she did to me to others in her life. I guess you could say I want to bring her to justice. I want to bring her to a realization of her prideful behavior and hurtful words. (And doing it, assuming it's ok because she has the gift of prophecy) Any thoughts on this? Adstar, Thank you for you letter writing advice. I have finished my first draft and will revisit it at a later time. To everyone else...thank you so much for taking the time to read my post and for caring enough to respond. If any of the rest of you have thoughts on the reconciliation point I raised above, I would appreciate the insight. Thanks!

Hi all. I'm new here. Looking for a little advice. Let me preface with this: