Iryssa

Don't let anyone tell you "you MUST get married NOW!!" because that's just silly *grin* seriously, though, don't dive into it just because someone else wants you to. The Bible doesn't say that being single is a sin. Check out 1 Corinthians Ch. 7...read the whole thing, 'cause it covers a lot of points on this subject *grin* happy reading!

I am currently attending three different churches...mostly because I've been kinda living in three different towns *rueful grin* Anyway, I attend a Northern Baptist church in the city (where I went to college for the past year and still have a place), an Alliance church in the town my parents live in (I'm there roughly 60% of my time, because I'm working for my dad), and an Anglican church (Canadian Anglican) in my Bible College town (I'm there every couple of weekends visiting friends and my boyfriend...I stay with a girlfriend while I'm up there, in case anyone's about to get the wrong impression). I've chosen these churches because of the people in them, and because none of them has preached any doctrine I disagree with. I love the mix of traditional and modern services I've been getting attending more than one church. The Anglican, obviously having a very traditional service format, is the smallest of these churches, and a lot of my Bible College professors go there and even lead services. The Alliance probably has the most modern service format, and I enjoyed my youth group years there...it's going through a lot of change right now, because pastors have moved on (we only have one full-time pastor right now, where before we had four!!), but it's a wonderful place. The Baptist church is the one my mom's extended family has attended as long as the building has stood. When I go, I usually go to the first service, so it's a little more traditional, but not as much as the Anglican.

I'm gonna be frank with you and tell you that whatever you might say to your friend, there is still a chance that he's gonna ostracize you. You, however, still need to do the right thing. I can't tell you exactly what to say to him, because I don't know him, I don't know you, and I don't know the exact circumstances. I can, however, give you some tips for when you do approach him. 1. Don't start slinging stones...this means not starting the conversation with things like "you've been such a jerk to me lately and it's all because of that guy you're hanging out with." He's gonna be on the defensive during this conversation, so remember to stay away from words or phrases that will make him want to lash out. 2. Use fact-based statements. For instance, "I just don't like him" is NOT a good argument, but "that time he called me a "Bible-thumper" and you didn't do anything about it really hurt my feelings" is better....you probably wouldn't word it like that exactly, but you get the picture. 3. Be prepared to face his anger, and don't retaliate in anger yourself. If you need to, walk away and approach him at a less emotional time. 4. Don't attack the guy who's been persecuting you personally with statements like "he's so stupid, I can't believe you hang out with him." Seems obvious, but it's SO easy to slip into that kind of thing during emotional conversations. 5. Be prepared to bargain. For instance, agree to hang out with your friend when the other guy isn't around. 6. Remember, you're trying to save your friendship, but you can't force your friend to hang out with you and ditch the other guy (even if it would be nice if you could)...so, make the conversation about your feelings, stressing that you care about him as a friend. "I'm hurt that our friendship is suffering because of his influence on your behaviour towards me." "Your friendship is important to me, and it hurts when you side with him when he's insulting me." 7. Approach him alone. If he's around other people, he's more likely to keep his defenses up. Hope that helps...I've had lots of those kinds of problems...sometimes my friends just flipped out and chose to ignore me, but most of the time they were pretty understanding. I don't think they ever ditched the bad-influence friends, but they were much more aware of how they treated me, and lots of times this solved the problem. A lot of it depends on the tone you take with the guy, too...keep your voice calm and don't get into a yelling match, even if he starts yelling. Avoid judgemental comments and tones...he's gonna interpret things as he will, but keep your conscience clear.

Oh, it's just not you...it's incredible to me that some people think that a thing so little as a song or a t-shirt can suddenly make people unsaved in another Christian's eyes.

I know that this probably isn't going to make me very popular, but this must be said: The whole "strong beats make people think lustful thoughts" or "heavy guitar makes people rebel" thing is completely unbased and logically fallacious. I happen to be one of those people that was moved towards God thanks to the influence of Christian rock. I can still remember listening to my first Christian rock song (performed by the band Delirious). I was crying for God by the time it was done, not thinking "BOY, I NEED SOME SEX!!" I can name off at least a dozen Christian Rock guitarists (none of them famous, though, so it won't mean anything to you) who have been some of the strongest Christian influences in my life. Anyone know of the Christian pop (which is a form of rock) band "Jake" ?? Most of them graduated from my Bible College. That's just my story. I do think that if anyone happens to be dragged down by rock music--whether or not it's Christian music--they should not be listening to it. But that's just common sense (or at least it should be). Now, I will give you a few reasons why the statements I listed in the first paragraph are logically unsound. 1. There are insufficient statistics to prove that those statements are true. I sincerely doubt anyone has actually asked Christian teens/young adults whether those things are true for them at all. This is called the "Insufficient Statistics" fallacy. 2. They are blanket statements. Which means they assume that what may be true of one song or genre--or even one person--is true for all. This is also called the "Hasty Generalization fallacy" 3. They imply a causal relationship which is fallacious in its core. This fallacy occurs when people assume that what happens after an event is caused by that event. For instance, rebelling after listening to a rock song. It's sometimes called the "Post Hoc" fallacy, which is short for post hoc ergo procter hoc, which means "After this therefore because of this." Such arguments would never even stand up in a highschool debate club. I would also like to point out that "thou shalt not listen to rock music" is not in the Bible. These, however, ARE in the Bible: "It is good to praise the LORD and make music to your name, O Most High" Ps. 92:1 "Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song." Ps. 95:2 "Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth, burst into jubilant song with music;" Ps. 98:4 "I will sing a new song to you, O God; on the ten-stringed lyre I will make music to you," Ps. 114:9 "Let them praise his name with dancing and make music to him with tambourine and harp" Ps. 149:3 I have heard the argument that the instruments listed in the Bible (such as the harp, tambourine, cymbals and lyre) are the only ones that we should be using in a church service...Well, if that's true, you all need to get rid of your pianos and organs, too. They were using the instruments that were current to the times, instruments that were jubilant and exciting to them. Well, for teens and young adults, the guitar and the drums are jubilant and exciting to us. If you're sexually aroused by a drumbeat, better stay away from big bands and Handel. If you're inspired to rebel by music of any kind, maybe you'd better examine what it is in your life you're so upset about, and see if there's a better way to deal with it. If you're still reading this post, I commend you, because it was long...I apologize for the length of it, but I guess I'm pretty passionate on this subject *grin* Thanks for hearing me out. EDIT: fixed a typo *grin*z

If any of you are in doubt about your child's religious rights in public schools, I encourage you to read this: Religion in the Public Schools - Joint Statement of Current Law

Don't have an interesting story for mine, really...My boyfriend (just a friend at the time) came up with it when I was trying to think of a good name for a character on a MAF (Multi-Author Fiction) message board that he owns...anyway, I liked it, so it stuck...now I use it for everything I do online. I did a search on it once, and only about a dozen things that came up weren't actually me (that was a couple years ago now, so there could be more...)

Aww...I just want to pick Trevor up and give him a big hug...sounds like the little tyke needs more of those My favourite line from a song (even though I don't much like the song itself) is by DC Talk..."Luv is a Verb." That little phrase says SO much about love.

No at Hockey games it is almost in the rule book to fight! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Bah! No it's not *grin* no more than it is in soccer or football...in fact, you usually get 5-10min penalty, plus a game misconduct for fighting...I've watched hockey my whole life, and have rarely seen a fight more often than once every four games I watch, if that. Anyway...totally off-topic. I totally agree sports can be an idol...people will give up more for football or hockey or even things like golf than most of us routinely give up for God...now there's a sad statement. And on the topic of cheerleaders...whose idea was it to put squads in highschools? Back in the day at least they were a little more covered (though maybe it was considered just as uncovered then...suppose it's relative to our current perception of acceptable fashion)...nowadays...sheesh...my mom would've burnt outfits like those...and lots of those girls are only about fifteen!

Woah...my first post (besides my little introduction)...well here goes For TV... Reba. Hands down. SO funny. Wholesome fun. For movies... I have two words for all of you: Veggie Tales. You would not believe how much I love those movies. My boyfriend owns every Veggie Tales there is. *grin* Anyway, that's my little plug for them... Movies more adults and teens will enjoy: "Kate & Leopold" (ladies, make your man watch this with you next Valentine's day ) Pretty sure there's nothing in that one...though I haven't seen it in about a year, so I could be wrong. "Pride & Prejudice" (the A&E version)...another Jane Austen "Lord of the Rings...." I think this may have been mentioned already, but these are my favourites. If you've read the books, watch the Extended Editions. They're more satisfying for Tolkien enthusiasts. No swearing. No nudity. Obviously, there are battle scenes, but if you've read the books, that prolly doesn't bother you. "Harry Potter..." LOTS of debate in Christian circles about these (but let's save that for another conversation, shall we? I'll bet it's prolly already been debated here, anyway...). There is no swearing and no nudity. Everything depends on whether you're a fan of fantasy. the original "Star Wars" Trilogy (can't say I'm a fan of the new ones). "Chariots of Fire" A classic. For a good reason. "What's Up, Doc?" A Barbara Streisand comedy. Hillarious. That's all I have off the top of my head, but I may come up with more eventually. Blessings and peace! ~Iryssa