i'm 50 years old and can't stand being alone anymore

[alien224]

GOD BLESS YOU. Know the feeling....praying you will find your wife.

[achristian2]

 

 

I have had only time to glance through the thread (read the short replies only) and will read it in more detail later but just wanted to address this post.

 

Onelight,

You said that you are on the opposite side--well, that's likely because you have never felt how bad loneliness can be. The feeling of loneliness can be so overwhelming and actually kills more people than smoking does.  I know because that was 1 of my spiritual warfare where the devil would heighten my loneliness so bad that I could almost not take it if not for God sustaining me. It was a fight and still a fight. Proverbs 18:22  He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.

 

 

 

I do not know what it is like not to have a wife, but in all honesty, I have wondered if I could do more for Him if I was single.  I love my whole family, but God has to come first.  Somehow, I feel like having a family restricts what I can do and where I can go.  Strange how we are on the opposite side of the coin here.

 

 

You are incorrect in your evaluation of my post.  I never said I didn't know loneliness, I said I don't know what it is like to not to have a wife.  A person can be in the middle of a million people and still feel loneliness.  Having a relationship does not equate to not being lonely. 

 

Yes, I misread your post. Forgive me. Its true that a person can be lonely even in a relationship. But it does help a great deal having a significant other.  Having no one is so much worse off (now I'm not talking about a case where the significant other is a terrible bully/abuser)

[achristian2]

 

 

 

I have had only time to glance through the thread (read the short replies only) and will read it in more detail later but just wanted to address this post.

 

Onelight,

You said that you are on the opposite side--well, that's likely because you have never felt how bad loneliness can be. The feeling of loneliness can be so overwhelming and actually kills more people than smoking does.  I know because that was 1 of my spiritual warfare where the devil would heighten my loneliness so bad that I could almost not take it if not for God sustaining me. It was a fight and still a fight. Proverbs 18:22  He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.

 

 

 

I do not know what it is like not to have a wife, but in all honesty, I have wondered if I could do more for Him if I was single.  I love my whole family, but God has to come first.  Somehow, I feel like having a family restricts what I can do and where I can go.  Strange how we are on the opposite side of the coin here.

 

 

You are incorrect in your evaluation of my post.  I never said I didn't know loneliness, I said I don't know what it is like to not to have a wife.  A person can be in the middle of a million people and still feel loneliness.  Having a relationship does not equate to not being lonely. 

 

 

My sister has a husband and kids but she told me not long ago that she is lonely. She asked me if I was. I told her that I wasn't lonely any more - yet I am single and have no kids.

 

There are indeed some that are single that aren't lonely, but majority of people that are single and looking for a mate or have given up looking for one are lonely. 

 

I will copy my reply to onelight below:

Yes, I misread your post. Forgive me. Its true that a person can be lonely even in a relationship. But it does help a great deal having a significant other.  Having no one is so much worse off (now I'm not talking about a case where the significant other is a terrible bully/abuser)

 

Sorry for the 'mini hijack of the thread' kronborg.

 

Thank you ncn (Nigel) for your beautiful testimony

Edited June 18, 2014 by achristian2

[OneLight]

I just want to see His will in my life. He leads me step by step.

This is the heart of everyone who follows Him. May I ask what His will is for your life as you see it?

[Guest kronborg]

The Words that come out of my mouth bring healing, joy, new hope and reverence for the Lord. I shall talk, teach, witness for so many in so many congregations as the Lord want's me too. I shall pray for the sick, and all this i have actually known in my heart for many years. I have a calling and actually already have begun by adressing a problem in a congregation via on of my youtube video's A problem nobody else have seen although the congregation has been around for a couple of years. But it is a very lonely thing because it takes the convincing power of the Holy Spirit to bring about repentance - i can only talk about the things God has showen me and pray and wait.

[RustyAngeL]

Thanx, for the answers but God just gave me a revelation. The answer is: If you want to get married then GO FOR IT!! Jesus says "Seek, and you will find" He dosen't say "wait, and you will find". I was dead wrong in believing that by praying and waiting God would GIVE me a wife. It's also called "The persuit of Happyness" not "The waiting for Happyness". So my mind is made up - for Gods sake, it's my life and i want a wife so now i overrides everything else in my life for "The persuit of Happyness" because i cannot, and i will not, live without a wife and i want a daughter too and now i'm going to FIGHT FOR IT and i don't care how difficult it will be, where i have to travel, or how long - for God's sake, it's my life. Isen't happyness worth fighting for? If Jesus wants to help me in my quest for a wife, that can give me a daugther too, then fine, but if He should choose not to, then ill be fighting just the same. The only prerequisite for at christian to gain a spouse is that she/he be a christian too - then one is free to marry whoever one wishes. Those who wait withers. Those who seek find.

Now I'm of to find me a wife - and i won't stop until i found her. Don't care how long, how far, how high, how deep or how difficult my journey may be - it's my life. And my life is worth fighting for.

Kornborg, Hi brother. The problem with us looking and "going for it" is we have a tenancy to get what I call a "settle for"  That is something that is not what God  has in mind at all.  I was 30 when I met my husband of 25 years.  He has been gone now for 6 years and I don't regret a day I waited.  And when I found him I wasn't even looking, but he was just what I needed and wanted.

 

God want's you to have the best.  And yes we have to take some steps, but this sounds as if you  have it all planned out and you are going to do it all on your own.  That can spell disaster.  The Bible says to "be still and know that He is God. "  

 

Yes you are worth fighting for,but God will do the fighting for you.  Your part is to just wait and be patient until the manifestation comes. You have told Him of your hearts desire, Stop trying to orchestrate this this yourself,  Stop running from one church to another to make it happen. We might not always get what we want but God will always give us what we need.  Rest in that.

 

Because He Lives !  Rustyangel

[RustyAngeL]

The Words that come out of my mouth bring healing, joy, new hope and reverence for the Lord. I shall talk, teach, witness for so many in so many congregations as the Lord want's me too. I shall pray for the sick, and all this i have actually known in my heart for many years. I have a calling and actually already have begun by adressing a problem in a congregation via on of my youtube video's A problem nobody else have seen although the congregation has been around for a couple of years. But it is a very lonely thing because it takes the convincing power of the Holy Spirit to bring about repentance - i can only talk about the things God has showen me and pray and wait.

Just keep spreading His Love to others, and doing what you are doing to spread the Gospel!

[Guest shiloh357]

Hi. I prayed for a wife earnestly in 1991 when i was 27 - now i'm 50 and i cannot go on anymore. My longing to have a wife and a little daughter is tearing my Heart apart. Today i really believed she would be in my new congregation, at the small pentacostal church, but again a dissapointment. If i wasen't a christian i would go over to the train-tracks and end my life - i love the Lord and is full of Him and serve Him, but still there is this huge hole in my Heart, this intense longing that almost makes me hallucinate, and i ask when? when? when? when? when? when? when? when? I'm 50 years old and i never even had a girlfriend in my entire life. please do something - no matter what. I can't stand it anymore. Why God, do you want me to be this miserable - this long?

I am single too, never been married, either.   But it's not the end of the world.  I am 47, not that much younger than you. 

 

The enemy would like you to get your focus off of Jesus and on to your circumstances, and wants you to blame God for why you are single.  

 

I personally didn''t get married when I was younger because I wasn't ready for it and I knew back in my twenties and thirties that I was not ready for that kind of life event.  I needed to mature and grow.  The wonderful thing for me is that knew I wasn't ready.  So many people who are not ready for marriage charge on ahead into marriage and it ends up being a disaster.

 

I found my fulfillment and wholeness in Jesus.  Because of that, I am not consumed with loneliness.  And if I do get married, I won't have unrealistic expectations for my wife. It is not her job to complete me or fulfill me.  That is what Jesus does.  For that reason, I can wait patiently.  He is my peace, my wholeness and I am content.  I would like to get married, but I am not worried about finding "Mrs. Right."   I am more concerned with making sure that I am "Mr. Right,"  that I am someone worth being married to, if I am ever blessed in that way.

 

I know guys who might contemplate suicide if they haven't had a date in six months.  When Jesus is your source of wholeness, that desperation is taken away completely.  I can rest in Him, knowing if that if things end up not changing, if no one ever does come my way, I am content in that.   God always has best for me.  I trust Him that He is making the right decisions and I just go along with whatever He has for me.  So whether or not a wife comes into my life or not, I am content. and am  in perfect peace.

 

Remember what the Bible says:  "The joy of the Lord is your strength."   Don't let the enemy steal your joy.  The joy of the Lord comes from being fulfilled by Him. That your strength; it's your staying power and you can have joy, even while you are waiting on the Lord to do something in your life.

[Guest kronborg]

I think that's a very sound advice. And your right that the enemy uses our needs to steal our joy. My search for a wife is over.

[achristian2]

_{Hats off to you Shiloh357. This is the first time that I've heard of a person that thought and acted like that through his 20s up till your age. It is really God giving you the grace so far. Praise God}