venting

[Guest Gettingoldgettinggrey]

Do you ever just get tired and maybe a little jaded? Have you heard all the pat answers from all the Church Ladies who haven't suffered the way you have? Do you ever feel like no one in your church is really as interested as you have been in them for all these years? Does it ever seem a bit one sided? Do you ever just want to vent to someone who will listen and maybe, just maybe commisserate with you instead of judgeing you for not being a constant live wire? Well that's where I'm at. Been a Christian for 28 years, read the Bible cover to cover at least 20 times, been a minister for 12 years (not a senior pastor). Never visited a chat room in my life, shouldn't have to to get what I need from my bothers and sisters. I'm 42. Grandpa died in '67, Mom in '77 and Dad in '87. Never had an older man I could vent to. Where are you guy's? You aint in my church. From what I can tell you ain't even in my county. All others need not reply.

[ayin jade]

Welcome to worthy.

I think you will find us like family here. Im female, so Im not what you were looking for to talk to, but I can assure you that you will find many good brothers to talk to.

God bless

[homebild]

.... shouldn't have to to get what I need from my bothers and sisters.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Male 49 here.

Don't comprehend why you would think you shouldn't have to get what you need from your brothers and sisters.

That is what the Body of Christ is all about: Getting what you need from the other members...

Edited March 2, 2005 by homebild

[Catsmeow]

I'm female but the same dilemna applies here. Giving often seems one-sided. There seems to be two kinds of people: givers and takers. Not too many who give as well as take.

They're either one or the other.

[Keith]

Getting Old Getting Grey (GOGG),

I'm 38/male. I understand your frustration and your longing. I bet if the subject were mentioned before the congregation at your church, others who feel the same way you do would be found. Unfortunately, too many people in our churches have chosen to put on their Sunday Masks instead of being real. They feel that if others find out they have struggles and problems, then "they" will think they aren't "spiritual". It comes from the fear of being judged and shamed.

Another part of it has to do with our society. Life has captured people, including the saints, into being busy, busy, busy all the time... only having time for themselves and theirs. It's the biggest lie of the devil: "You'd better learn to take care of yourself because no one else is going to." It's a beastly lie!

People are trying so hard to get caught up that trying to fit other people into their day/lives is just not a priority. I'm single and experience this almost daily.

- Parents are so busy that kids are left to fend for themselves for the most part.

- Kids are involved in so many different activities that their parents are running them here and there that the parents are running ragged for their kids.

- Spouses are having a hard enough time trying to balance time with their spouse, their kids and their ever-demanding jobs.

- Technology has enslaved most people. We are tied to our cell phones, pagers, palm pilots, television, etc.,

People seem to be afraid to turn around anymore because there always seems to be something else that needs their attention or someone who needs something from them. Everything seems urgent, needing priority! We've lost the sense of what's important. God and others. If a serious thing happens in our lives, we often find that these everyday things that demand our attention are really not so important after all.

People say they don't have time to get everything done, much less try to spend time in the Word and prayer. Instead of trying to fit God into our day, I believe we should be planning our days around our time with God. When I do this, I find that tasks become easier and more productive.

People will always fail us. God won't.

If you've read this far, I thank you for your time. Sincerely. Because it's the most valuable commodity we have to give each other. I understand your frustration because I have reached a point where my heart is crying out, "There's more to life than this. Something is missing." I took the time to listen.

My heart desires a deep love with someone. It longs to love and be loved in return. It desires to be fulfilled. It's also been pierced with so many arrows. Arrows of hurt, anger, fear, frustration, questions, etc., Arrows that I have covered up or tried to bury. Arrows that, if untended, fester and become infected. They need to be attended to and healed.

I have friends that love me. I'd like to have more. I have everyone here at Worthy. They've been like a balm to my wounds and I love them all for it! But I made a decision. I am going to put all the love and friendship I long to lavish on others to God. I am concentrating on building a deep, love relationship with Him. I want to know God so intimately and know His voice and presence so deeply and personally that my heart is no longer lacking anything. In turn, my life won't lack anything!

I have seen the fruits of this already. Because of my time with God, and getting to know Him intimately, other people have been drawn to me. (Rather to God in me.) They see something in me that they want and have been wanting to spend time with me. I have no qualms about telling them that they are seeing what God will do for us when we have a deep, meaningful relationship with Him. I tell them that it doesn't have anything to with me directly. I'm just an imperfect person with a relationship with a perfect God. They listen, too.

GOGG, I don't know if this is at all close to what you were talking about, but the words in this post flowed out of my hands. My favorite thing in this world is talking to others about God and His faithfulness!

You will find many here at Worthy who will love and listen to you. I hope you will stick around and be refreshed! We (I) would like to get to know you!

[Christ's Free Servant]

Getting Old Getting Grey (GOGG),

People say they don't have time to get everything done, much less try to spend time in the Word and prayer.  Instead of trying to fit God into our day, I believe we should be planning our days around our time with God.  When I do this, I find that tasks become easier and more productive. 

People will always fail us.  God won't. 

If you've read this far, I thank you for your time.  Sincerely.  Because it's the most valuable commodity we have to give each other.  I understand your frustration because I have reached a point where my heart is crying out, "There's more to life than this.  Something is missing."  I took the time to listen.

My heart desires a deep love with someone.  It longs to love and be loved in return.  It desires to be fulfilled.  It's also been pierced with so many arrows.  Arrows of hurt, anger, fear, frustration, questions, etc.,  Arrows that I have covered up or tried to bury.  Arrows that, if untended, fester and become infected.  They need to be attended to and healed. 

I have friends that love me.  I'd like to have more.  I have everyone here at Worthy.  They've been like a balm to my wounds and I love them all for it!  But I made a decision.  I am going to put all the love and friendship I long to lavish on  others to God.  I am concentrating on building a deep, love relationship with Him.  I want to know God so intimately and know His voice and presence so deeply and personally that my heart is no longer lacking anything.  In turn, my life won't lack anything!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Keith,

Thank you so much for these words! If this is truly your heart's desire, which I believe it is, God will not fail you. Do you remember the first time you fell deeply in love with someone? You wanted to talk with that person all the time. You could not wait until the next visit or the next phone call. You would stay up half the night talking and listening to that person. You wanted to be with her (him in my case) more than anything. You were excited at the sound of that person's voice. You wanted to embrace her (him), hold her (him), just drink in her (his) beauty. You would lose sleep just to hear her (his) voice.

That is the kind of relationship God wants with each one of us. We say we love God. His word says our life shows whether or not we truly love him. How can we say we love God if we can't even manage to fit him into our day? That is not love. Can you imagine if your sweetheart treated you the way that we often treat God? I don't think she would stick around very long. Good thing God is not like that, though. He is very patient with us. He longs for us. He wants to have an intimate relationship with us. He wants us to love him like we love our sweetheart. He wants to be our first love.

I will be praying for you as you develop that closer walk with God that you will truly fall in love with Jesus. There is no greater love than his!!

And, I will pray for this man who began this post that he, too, will fall in love with Jesus, too!

[ayin jade]

Getting Old Getting Grey (GOGG),

I'm 38/male.  I understand your frustration and your longing.  I bet if the subject were mentioned before the congregation at your church, others who feel the same way you do would be found.  Unfortunately, too many people in our churches have chosen to put on their Sunday Masks instead of being real.  They feel that if others find out they have struggles and problems, then "they" will think they aren't "spiritual".  It comes from the fear of being judged and shamed. 

Another part of it has to do with our society.  Life has captured people, including the saints, into being busy, busy, busy all the time... only having time for themselves and theirs.  It's the biggest lie of the devil:  "You'd better learn to take care of yourself because no one else is going to."  It's a beastly lie!

People are trying so hard to get caught up that trying to fit other people into their day/lives is just not a priority.  I'm single and experience this almost daily.

- Parents are so busy that kids are left to fend for themselves for the most part.

- Kids are involved in so many different activities that their parents are running them here and there that the parents are running ragged for their kids.

- Spouses are having a hard enough time trying to balance time with their spouse, their kids and their ever-demanding jobs.

- Technology has enslaved most people.  We are tied to our cell phones, pagers, palm pilots, television, etc., 

People seem to be afraid to turn around anymore because there always seems to be something else that needs their attention or someone who needs something from them.  Everything seems urgent, needing priority!  We've lost the sense of what's important.  God and others.  If a serious thing happens in our lives, we often find that these everyday things that demand our attention are really not so important after all.

People say they don't have time to get everything done, much less try to spend time in the Word and prayer.  Instead of trying to fit God into our day, I believe we should be planning our days around our time with God.  When I do this, I find that tasks become easier and more productive. 

People will always fail us.  God won't. 

If you've read this far, I thank you for your time.  Sincerely.  Because it's the most valuable commodity we have to give each other.  I understand your frustration because I have reached a point where my heart is crying out, "There's more to life than this.  Something is missing."  I took the time to listen.

My heart desires a deep love with someone.  It longs to love and be loved in return.  It desires to be fulfilled.  It's also been pierced with so many arrows.  Arrows of hurt, anger, fear, frustration, questions, etc.,  Arrows that I have covered up or tried to bury.  Arrows that, if untended, fester and become infected.  They need to be attended to and healed. 

I have friends that love me.  I'd like to have more.  I have everyone here at Worthy.  They've been like a balm to my wounds and I love them all for it!  But I made a decision.  I am going to put all the love and friendship I long to lavish on  others to God.  I am concentrating on building a deep, love relationship with Him.  I want to know God so intimately and know His voice and presence so deeply and personally that my heart is no longer lacking anything.  In turn, my life won't lack anything!

I have seen the fruits of this already.  Because of my time with God, and getting to know Him intimately, other people have been drawn to me.  (Rather to God in me.)  They see something in me that they want and have been wanting to spend time with me.  I have no qualms about telling them that they are seeing what God will do for us when we have a deep, meaningful relationship with Him.  I tell them that it doesn't have anything to with me directly.  I'm just an imperfect person with a relationship with a perfect God. They listen, too. 

GOGG, I don't know if this is at all close to what you were talking about, but the words in this post flowed out of my hands.  My favorite thing in this world is talking to others about God and His faithfulness! 

You will find many here at Worthy who will love and listen to you.  I hope you will stick around and be refreshed!  We (I) would like to get to know you!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That is beautiful Keith.

[Guest Gettingoldgettinggrey]

.... shouldn't have to to get what I need from my bothers and sisters.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Male 49 here.

Don't comprehend why you would think you shouldn't have to get what you need from your brothers and sisters.

That is what the Body of Christ is all about: Getting what you need from the other members...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What I'm saying is I don't think I should have to go to a chat room to get it when I have been an associate in the same church for 10 years. They say you tend to be the most critical in the areas you are gifted in and my gift is to encourage the discouraged. I wonder where in my church after all this time is the listening ear when I get discouraged. Just venting my brother, just venting, but please, respond. It's always good to meet brothers and sisters even if it's online.

[Guest Gettingoldgettinggrey]

I'm female but the same dilemna applies here. Giving often seems one-sided. There seems to be two kinds of people: givers and takers. Not too many who give as well as take.

They're either one or the other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I've got to agree with you sis. As someone who has been an associate and even pastored between senior pastors i've found that at best 20% give. I'm not talking about money either. In my position I don't know and don't want to know who gives what monitarily. But who gives love and time and encouragement is obvious. I'm just venting sis. If you are one of those 20% you just keep up the good work. Your church leadership knows who you are and God knows who you are and 90% or better of the real stuff that gets done for the kingdom gets done by people like you. God loves to work through human agency and he will bless you. I know it can be especially hard on a giving sister. My wife gives 110% and most gals aren't even deep enough to drop the "mask" when they come to church. Hard for lady warriors to find trustworthy friends sometimes. All you need is one.

[Guest Gettingoldgettinggrey]

Getting Old Getting Grey (GOGG),

I'm 38/male.  I understand your frustration and your longing.  I bet if the subject were mentioned before the congregation at your church, others who feel the same way you do would be found.  Unfortunately, too many people in our churches have chosen to put on their Sunday Masks instead of being real.  They feel that if others find out they have struggles and problems, then "they" will think they aren't "spiritual".  It comes from the fear of being judged and shamed. 

Another part of it has to do with our society.  Life has captured people, including the saints, into being busy, busy, busy all the time... only having time for themselves and theirs.  It's the biggest lie of the devil:  "You'd better learn to take care of yourself because no one else is going to."  It's a beastly lie!

People are trying so hard to get caught up that trying to fit other people into their day/lives is just not a priority.  I'm single and experience this almost daily.

- Parents are so busy that kids are left to fend for themselves for the most part.

- Kids are involved in so many different activities that their parents are running them here and there that the parents are running ragged for their kids.

- Spouses are having a hard enough time trying to balance time with their spouse, their kids and their ever-demanding jobs.

- Technology has enslaved most people.  We are tied to our cell phones, pagers, palm pilots, television, etc., 

People seem to be afraid to turn around anymore because there always seems to be something else that needs their attention or someone who needs something from them.  Everything seems urgent, needing priority!  We've lost the sense of what's important.  God and others.  If a serious thing happens in our lives, we often find that these everyday things that demand our attention are really not so important after all.

People say they don't have time to get everything done, much less try to spend time in the Word and prayer.  Instead of trying to fit God into our day, I believe we should be planning our days around our time with God.  When I do this, I find that tasks become easier and more productive. 

People will always fail us.  God won't. 

If you've read this far, I thank you for your time.  Sincerely.  Because it's the most valuable commodity we have to give each other.  I understand your frustration because I have reached a point where my heart is crying out, "There's more to life than this.  Something is missing."  I took the time to listen.

My heart desires a deep love with someone.  It longs to love and be loved in return.  It desires to be fulfilled.  It's also been pierced with so many arrows.  Arrows of hurt, anger, fear, frustration, questions, etc.,  Arrows that I have covered up or tried to bury.  Arrows that, if untended, fester and become infected.  They need to be attended to and healed. 

I have friends that love me.  I'd like to have more.  I have everyone here at Worthy.  They've been like a balm to my wounds and I love them all for it!  But I made a decision.  I am going to put all the love and friendship I long to lavish on  others to God.  I am concentrating on building a deep, love relationship with Him.  I want to know God so intimately and know His voice and presence so deeply and personally that my heart is no longer lacking anything.  In turn, my life won't lack anything!

I have seen the fruits of this already.  Because of my time with God, and getting to know Him intimately, other people have been drawn to me.  (Rather to God in me.)  They see something in me that they want and have been wanting to spend time with me.  I have no qualms about telling them that they are seeing what God will do for us when we have a deep, meaningful relationship with Him.  I tell them that it doesn't have anything to with me directly.  I'm just an imperfect person with a relationship with a perfect God. They listen, too. 

GOGG, I don't know if this is at all close to what you were talking about, but the words in this post flowed out of my hands.  My favorite thing in this world is talking to others about God and His faithfulness! 

You will find many here at Worthy who will love and listen to you.  I hope you will stick around and be refreshed!  We (I) would like to get to know you!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Kieth, you've hit the nail on the head. Everything good and productive in this walk is a product of intimate time spent with God. You have just spelled out seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all thimgs will be added unto you. I think you're on the right track and you've reminded me of what I already know but need to concentrate on anew. If you stay commited to putting what you want from others into God I guarantee you will get the oppourtunity to GIVE it to others and it will come back to you. Don't be discouraged by my venting. I'll probably vent on here now and then now that I've found it. Kinda like Asaph "why do the wicked prosper" he knew the answer, he just needed to hear it from someone else.