Marathoner Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 73 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 10,305 Content Per Day: 7.11 Reputation: 13,335 Days Won: 99 Joined: 05/24/2020 Status: Online Share Posted November 9, 2023 2 hours ago, Starise said: My experiences are rather bland in my own guestimations as compared to some other stories. I mean, I wanted to say I was a satanist or I snorted coke, or I was an atheist, but no. I was saved young and at one point I thought God was keeping me from fun, so I tried a few things which were only temporary fun. I don't believe I was ever "unsaved" I just drifted away for a time. God grabbed my heart at six years old, so not much room there for anything that might make the YouTube stats. In hindsight I missed a lot of the bad stuff others went through, and I guess I wouldn't trade that for being saved young. Not that I haven't gone though both health, marital hardships and a vice or two. Not a squeaky clean life by any standards. If anything it only reenforced the emptiness that exists without God in your life or as a believer in a backslidden condition. Those lost never knew any different, and those saved never looked deep enough with consistency. There's nothing bland about the testimony of the saints, my friend. The Lord has blessed me with the opportunity to get to know you beyond the confines of the forum, so I happen to know that you're a kind, compassionate, and sincere brother. You're also very talented. Our testimony speaks about the glory of God and yours is no exception. It's worth remembering that none of us chose the circumstances of our birth. That can be a hard thing for some to grapple with --- I have compassion for those who struggle to understand --- but each of us is different in that regard. For myself, the evil of this world of men stood in stark contrast to the goodness and mercy of Jesus Christ. I believe it would be worthwhile to share the power of the Lord once again with you. I witnessed His power more than once before the Spirit of the Lord revealed Himself to me. Two astonishing things happened in the same day: I overcame my mother's grooming for the last time and my father became a broken man. Once I was too large for my mother to physically abuse, she focused her efforts upon manipulating my father by framing me as a threat. I would listen to her goad him to do "something about me:" I was too big and too rebellious (I defied her), listened to music she didn't like, I was ungrateful, I frightened her, and so on. She tormented my father incessantly and he eventually caved to her demands. I knew it was coming and prepared myself. He stormed into my bedroom, and I stood up to face him. There was a wild look in his eyes, so I said this to him: "Kill me, dad. Kill me because I can't take another day in this living hell. Kill me because I can't do it myself. I try but nothing works. Please do it for me!" That rage evaporated in an instant. My father looked at me in horror, and he started to weep. He left my bedroom and secluded himself in his office/study down the hallway. He locked the door and refused to come out for a few days. He spoke to no one during this time. When he emerged, he knocked on my bedroom door. I let him in, and he embraced me for a long time. My father repented of all of the evil he had done to us, from the time I was a young child until that day. We sat together on my bed and he told he that he didn't expect to be forgiven by any of us. From that day forward, he would be the father we needed and deserved, especially me. He was afraid that I would go down the wrong path and/or end up dead, and he took responsibility for this. When he looked at me, he saw himself. That's when I learned about the horror of his own upbringing. True to his word, my father was indeed a changed man. He quietly defeated my mother's schemes, vetoing the harsh punishments she insisted upon which was made possible because his military career had changed, so he was home every day. God gave our father to us, and he became my best friend and advisor. He was merciful and kind. Most importantly, we came to know him as the man he truly was. He was a goofball and terribly funny. So, we were very much alike as he had said. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itty-bitty lamb Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 6 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 80 Content Per Day: 0.42 Reputation: 107 Days Won: 2 Joined: 11/04/2023 Status: Offline Share Posted November 9, 2023 14 hours ago, Marathoner said: I'm so glad that you did because I was moved to do the same. I've never shared the above with anyone before, so it was good to do that while it was still today. We're certainly not alone in coming out of great adversity for there are many of us who have. I've referred to what I shared only obliquely both here on the forum and elsewhere for it isn't always needful to divulge details; as the scripture informs us, there is a time for every matter under heaven. This was that time for both of us. The Lord bless you for sharing with us, my friend. I was edified and encouraged greatly! Yes exactly, and as the scripture says not to cast your pearls out there. Some testimonies are just too personal and too sensitive of material. No one will fully understand what you went through except God, Himself. No one else will be able to connect all those dots in your life that led up to you being saved. No one else but God saw you alone, in survival mode, being abused by the very people on this earth meant to protect you, and fully understand what it took to pull you up and out of there. So there is a time for every matter. We both can relate to each other, and i know i was encouraged by your testimony so much. Again, thank you also for sharing! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marathoner Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 73 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 10,305 Content Per Day: 7.11 Reputation: 13,335 Days Won: 99 Joined: 05/24/2020 Status: Online Share Posted November 9, 2023 When I hear (or read about) the testimony of brothers and sisters who experienced a different life than I did, I'm greatly encouraged. I witness the hand of the Lord in their lives, providing for them and their families through trying times. I'm blessed to consider how He gave their children wonderful fathers and mothers. No one should "compare" testimonies because that's not what it's about. I believe that each of us are prepared for our calling in Jesus Christ according to our experiences in this life either before we came to Him, once we are in His hand, or both. That was certainly true in my case. I learned what enduring and pressing on meant by virtue of my experiences in the house of my parents. I became familiar with fear and pain and through this, I also became acquainted with courage. Courage is not the lack of fear, my friends. Courage is the resolve to stand in spite of fear. I did my very best to abdicate this life our Lord had given to me but in His compassion, He preserved me instead. The same is true of us all. God is good! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itty-bitty lamb Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 6 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 80 Content Per Day: 0.42 Reputation: 107 Days Won: 2 Joined: 11/04/2023 Status: Offline Share Posted November 9, 2023 3 hours ago, Starise said: You ARE welcome. I just wanted to re emphasize that. Glad to have you here sister! You may find this surprising, but I am usually not given to social things, and it takes some effort for me to "come out". Lots of people all talking at once about inconsequentials is draining on me. At our last church social one of my buds had to go get me and pull me in there. He hovered over me in a good way and made me feel more at ease. I have had one person who I meet with in a group tell me I am the kind of person who makes everyone feel at ease. What? My mental focus is disrupted at loud noises, bright lights and social riff raff, but get me in a room with a few other people talking deeper things and maybe that works better for me. At good churches people CARE, and this can sometimes look as if they are hovering. I don't mean the places where people take turns "greeting". I mean the places where someone comes up to you and asks you a little bit about yourself, maybe offers to help you find a seat, and generally is a friend right off the bat. Smaller groups and gatherings work best for those who are new. They bring us out of our shells, so maybe look for one of those. It helps to know a little bit about theology and the agendas some of these churches preach. The only "agenda" should be the bible and fellowship. And God won't hate you if you miss or go to another church. If you need a day off you need a day off. I try not to make that a habit. You have gifts. I don't know what they are. They might be used in the church or maybe somewhere else, but the church can help us to identify those gifts so we can sharpen them. I would add we need freedom in those gifts. One reason I haven't played music much ion my present church, I don't feel the freedom to worship in my gifts, but maybe that's something I need to deal with. Over the years I have moved across churches as my needs have changed and as I have felt led. I don't think that's a sin. You've just described to me an introvert personality. Some might say you are shy in social settings, but they are wrong. You are not shy at all, as seen by your confidence in engaging with conversations. You have excellent social skills. You are just a personality that values the deeper waters of conversations rather than the hustle and bustle of 'how is the weather' water levels. Large crowds will drain you, and you will need to recharge afterwards in your own way, by finding your 'me time', or 'alone time'. When you make a friend, you make a friend for life. You draw them into your inner circle. These are introvert characteristics. There is nothing wrong with you, you are operating normal! Lol, i know this, because i am also an introvert. i am easily drained and over stimulated by social settings, and loud environments. i run home for a nap to recharge and process. i don't know what my gifts are. ive had people tell me what they are, but that always leads to stress for myself. i guess they are right, but i lack in mentorship. i really just want a church where i can disappear into the pew and soak in God's word. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itty-bitty lamb Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Junior Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 6 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 80 Content Per Day: 0.42 Reputation: 107 Days Won: 2 Joined: 11/04/2023 Status: Offline Share Posted November 9, 2023 3 hours ago, Starise said: My experiences are rather bland in my own guestimations as compared to some other stories. I mean, I wanted to say I was a satanist or I snorted coke, or I was an atheist, but no. I was saved young and at one point I thought God was keeping me from fun, so I tried a few things which were only temporary fun. I don't believe I was ever "unsaved" I just drifted away for a time. God grabbed my heart at six years old, so not much room there for anything that might make the YouTube stats. In hindsight I missed a lot of the bad stuff others went through, and I guess I wouldn't trade that for being saved young. Not that I haven't gone though both health, marital hardships and a vice or two. Not a squeaky clean life by any standards. If anything it only reenforced the emptiness that exists without God in your life or as a believer in a backslidden condition. Those lost never knew any different, and those saved never looked deep enough with consistency. And @Marathoner has voiced my thoughts so well on this! There are core lessons the Lord has taught you through your own testimony, that i do not have through mine. And i am blessed, and others are blessed, because of the work the Lord has done in your life. God knows what each of us needed to bring us over to Him and be saved. We are all born into different lots of life. Praise God He has given us a new kind of birth so that we can be sons and daughters with Him! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 13,120 Content Per Day: 9.67 Reputation: 13,643 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted November 9, 2023 37 minutes ago, itty-bitty lamb said: And @Marathoner has voiced my thoughts so well on this! There are core lessons the Lord has taught you through your own testimony, that i do not have through mine. And i am blessed, and others are blessed, because of the work the Lord has done in your life. God knows what each of us needed to bring us over to Him and be saved. We are all born into different lots of life. Praise God He has given us a new kind of birth so that we can be sons and daughters with Him! Well it feels good to have a kindred spirit here. I appreciate your observations and words of encouragement. Maybe one of your gifts? Thanks so much. I often feel such a weight for a few unbelievers. In that respect I feel like a failure. Of course it isn't over yet. I know God uses those of us who are willing to be used, even if we don't see any of it. GOD'S VOICE SATAN'S VOICE Calms Obsesses Comforts Worries Convicts Condemns Encourages Discourages Enlightens Confuses Leads Pushes Reassures Frightens Stills Rushes 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Your closest friendnt Posted November 9, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 18 Topic Count: 7 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 7,878 Content Per Day: 2.41 Reputation: 2,769 Days Won: 3 Joined: 06/05/2015 Status: Offline Share Posted November 9, 2023 (edited) 1 hour ago, Starise said: Well it feels good to have a kindred spirit here. I appreciate your observations and words of encouragement. Maybe one of your gifts? Thanks so much. I often feel such a weight for a few unbelievers. In that respect I feel like a failure. Of course it isn't over yet. I know God uses those of us who are willing to be used, even if we don't see any of it. GOD'S VOICE SATAN'S VOICE Calms Obsesses Comforts Worries Convicts Condemns Encourages Discourages Enlightens Confuses Leads Pushes Reassures Frightens Stills Rushes The Devil can also be a friend and encourage people in their unbelief and also promises success. To Keep in mind he is a spiritual power. And he gets his way. Edited November 9, 2023 by Your closest friendnt 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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