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Jonah


mrcorey

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Translations say different things.

All these passages are from the same translation. :P

:P

Ok, here are a couple of translations.....this is for myself too, not just to prove you incorrect!!!!!......... :P

:P

"But the Lord provided a........."

NIV : "fish"

KJV : "fish"

LB : "great fish"

AMP Version : "great fish"

NKJV "great fish"

Into the Light Version :" Big fish"

GNB "Large fish"

:):):P

Wow!!

I must have read my Bibles all wrong!!!

:)

Oh well.

Now I know! :)

Scene: 1st grade class in a pulic school discussing whales.

Sarah (age 6): Teacher, did you know that in the Bible is says that a man named Jonah got swallowed by a whale and after 3 days it spit him out; and he was alive?

Teacher: Sarah, honey, that's just a fairy tale. Whales don't swallow people and spit them out.

Sarah: Yes, they do. It's in the Bible, so it must be true!

Teacher(getting annoyed): Listen, the mouth of a whale is too small; that did not ever happen; it is just a fairy tale.

Sarah(confidently): Well, when I get to heaven I'm going to ask Jonah.

Teacher(smugly): What if Jonah didn't go to heaven.

Sarah (smiling sweetly) : Then you can ask him.

:)

:)

:P:):):):):):)

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I dont think the question is whether or not it was a fish or a whale. The real issue is that this particular sea creature was especially prepared by God for a specific purpose, and was under God's control and direction the whole time. It swallowed Jonah and after 3 days it deposited Jonah on dry land.

Jonah 1:17 And the Lord prepared a great fish.....

Jonah 2:10 the Lord spoke to the fish, and the fish vomited him up on land....

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In other words . . .

The Lord gave Jonah the first all-natural submarine ride back to Ninevah!

:emot-hug:

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In other words . . .

The Lord gave Jonah the first all-natural submarine ride back to Ninevah!

:emot-hug:

Right-e-o

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Well I suppose if you can believe a house & clothes can have leprosy, that a leprosy infested house should be torn down and the blood of dead birds sprinkled 7 times would cure leprosy, as is clearly stated by the "Lord" in Leviticus 14: 33-57, then you could certainly swallow a tale about Jonah being swallowed then spit up 3 days later by a really big fish.

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i think we assume it was a whale just like we (not really) assume that the fruit of the tree of knowledge was an apple. :emot-hug:

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The Bible does not say that the blood fo a bird can cure leprosy.

The point of the verses are as follows:

34: ...I put the plague of leprosy in a house of the land of your possession;

Here, Jehovah admits that he himself put a plague on a house.

37:....if the plague be in the walls of the house with hollow strakes, greenish or reddish, which in sight are lower than the wall;

39 ...if the plague be spread in the walls of the house;

Here we learn that various skin diseases, represented by the word "leprosy" can infect the walls of a house, according to this allegedly "omniscient" god.

40 Then the priest shall command that they take away the stones in which the plague is ,....

Here this "omniscient" god informs us stones can also be infected with skin diseases, just like a house can and just like walls can.

42 And they shall take other stones, and put them in the place of those stones;

So the stones in the house, which MUST be infected with skin disease, or bacteria which infects flesh, must be replaced, according to Jehovah.

43 And if the plague come again, and break out in the house....

Jehovah states "if" the plague come again, after he already admitted he himself infected the house, walls and stones with bacteria that normally infects flesh, in verse 34. If Jehovah himself sent the plague as he admitted, why would he need to guess whether he would plague the house again? And why would a "loving" god infect his people with skin diseases in the first place, much less their houses, walls & stones?

The ritual you are reffering to was performed only after the leprosy was already gone.

Then the ritual was totally pointless and unnecessary. The verses state:

48 And if the priest shall come in, and look upon it , and, behold, the plague hath not spread in the house, after the house was plaistered: then the priest shall pronounce the house clean, because the plague is healed. *n 49 And he shall take to cleanse the house two birds, and cedar wood, and scarlet, and hyssop:

Notice, the verses do not state the house, or walls or stone was already free of the "plague." The verse states " the plague hath not spread in the house." The text is clear. The house is not free of the plague. The plague simply has not spread further. The text then goes on to give a ritual of sympathetic magic, much like modern day pagans might use, to rid the house of the plague.

So, to sum up:

1. Jehovah himself sent plague on the house (v34)

2. Jehovah claims diseases such as leprosy, which here can refer to skin ailments such as psoriasis or exzema, can infect houses, walls of houses and stones in the walls of the houses. How come an "omniscient" being such as Jehovah did not know skin diseases are transferred by virus and bacteria from flesh to flesh? Why does Jehovah stupidly think skin diseases can infect homes, walls and stones, even to the point of recommending these infected stones be replaced?

3. Since Jehovah claims to have sent this "plague" on the house in the first place, why does he then provide instruction on "if" the plague returns? If Jehovah sent the plague, surely he himself can cure it, without requiring stones be replaced or sprinkling the blood of dead birds.

4. It is exceedingly ignorant to tell people to sprinkle the blood of dead birds in houses to clear them of a plague which hasn't further spread. First of all, houses, walls and stones can not become infected with diseases like psoriasis or exzema, which means sprinkling the blood of dead birds is totally pointless and stupid instructions. Yet, Jehovah was too ignorant to know these things.

So, as I said earlier, if you can believe these passages involving curing houses, walls and stones of leprosy and other skin diseases, you can certainly believe that donkeys and snakes can speak or that a man could be swallowed by a large fish and then be spit back out 3 days later.

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In other words . . .

The Lord gave Jonah the first all-natural submarine ride back to Ninevah!

:)

Right-e-o

i think we assume it was a whale just like we (not really) assume that the fruit of the tree of knowledge was an apple. :)

:blink::blink:

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