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Fasting in secret


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Mathew 6:18 tells us that when we fast, we should fast in secret.

An issue that I sometimes run into is that when people invite you to eat with them or bring food to work for everyone or have bible study meals, and you don't join them,  they can sometimes get a little offended.  

What is a good way to politely decline the meal in a way that you're being honest and yet still keeping your fasting in secret?

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I'm going to let the very scripture you cite answer your question.

Matthew 6:16-18

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”

What this is saying is don't draw dramatic attention to what you are doing.  Don't "perform" a starvation act.

It's fine to say, "No thanks - I'm fasting today. " And on those days, Jesus says - wash up, perk up, and don't let anyone think you are "suffering".  

It's fine to tell someone if they offer to take you to lunch or bring a lunch to share with the office.

 

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If someone is "offended" when you "politely decline the meal", then they are being unreasonable. 

There are many reasons a person may "politely decline the meal". Many people nowadays fast for non-spiritual reasons. Many are on restrictive diets. It may be because of diabetes, or lactose intolerance, or Chrones disorder etc. Some medications affect appetite. People have allergies. Maybe you are just not hungry - that is allowed. etc., etc.

There are so many valid reasons to "decline the meal". It is therefore absurd for the person offering the meal to assume offense.

I suppose you could say you are currently on a restrictive diet. If you feel so inclined, you could tell them your diet includes periods of fasting. They don't need to know why.

I think the Matthew verse is more about having the right attitude - that your fast is between you and God (and not anyone else's business)- as opposed to a legalistic prohibition on mentioning that you are fasting. That is, don't be like the religious leaders who would use fasting to play the self-righteous martyr - to show everyone how holy and pious they were. 

 

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10 hours ago, Tristen said:

There are so many valid reasons to "decline the meal". It is therefore absurd for the person offering the meal to assume offense.

In the 90s I heard from different people who were missionaries that they went to some poor country, visited people and you had to eat what they gave you. Oh wait maybe because of that Bible text? 

And remain in the same house, eating and drinking such things as they give, for the laborer is worthy of his wages. Do not go from house to house. Whatever city you enter, and they receive you, eat such things as are set before you.
Luke 10:7‭-‬8 NKJV
https://bible.com/bible/114/luk.10.7-8.NKJV

So some old woman living on a mountain had the most disgusting milk months over the date, rotting, but eat what they give you, so they did that. Yeah you have to use your faith to not get sick and you may not offend them. And they were almost bragging about the disgusting filth they ate. I always thought it was crazy, but didn't dare go against them, because they were the missionaries who knew that. Anyway I would just say: No thanks. I'm fasting or whatever.

Or if you insist on not offending them use the secret sprout remover.

Screenshot_20240421_112638_Chrome.jpg.a125ea035601328e1411f7d06678e037.jpgScreenshot_20240421_112548_Chrome.jpg.f16d67e000d6a566f77dd9a8e319d7bc.jpg

 

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On 4/20/2024 at 7:31 PM, Dunsee said:

Mathew 6:18 tells us that when we fast, we should fast in secret.

An issue that I sometimes run into is that when people invite you to eat with them or bring food to work for everyone or have bible study meals, and you don't join them,  they can sometimes get a little offended.  

What is a good way to politely decline the meal in a way that you're being honest and yet still keeping your fasting in secret?

It depends on what is important to you.

To maintain a self imposed  discipline, even if it offends people you are close to, or are you like Paul willing to give up everything inorder to reach people.

I'm  assuming  these co workers are not Christian who invite you to share their food, so accept the offer, don't  make a fuss  about breaking your fast and seek opertunities to gossip the gospel.

 

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On 4/21/2024 at 1:31 AM, Dunsee said:

Mathew 6:18 tells us that when we fast, we should fast in secret.

An issue that I sometimes run into is that when people invite you to eat with them or bring food to work for everyone or have bible study meals, and you don't join them,  they can sometimes get a little offended.  

What is a good way to politely decline the meal in a way that you're being honest and yet still keeping your fasting in secret?

I am not eating with you but it is not that I can’t have a good day with you. 
I  enjoy talking with you but just that I can’t tell you what I am fasting about. There must be more that we can talk about. 

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