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I have no idea if the Christian online matchmaking services are any good, but they advertise a lot on TV here: Christian Mingle AND a close friend met her Christian husband through eHarmony, and they have been married nearly 15 years now. You can find their websites by doing a simple Google search. I know they charge for the service but I have no idea how much. I repeat, I really do not know their percentage of success rate. So it may or maynot be worth the try.

The "IF" you pointed out belongs there. It is not saying we are saved "if" and when we continually keep His commandments. It is is clearly saying we can and will know that we are truly born again because the real McCoy will continually produce a desire to obey. The one who does not continually strive to obey, proves by his actions that he never was genuinely born again in the first place. As for the teachers that have had the most influence on my spiritual growth, Dr. John MacArthur Jr. via his "Grace to you" radio program had the most, but there were quite a few others. If you are unfamiliar with Dr. MacArthur, here is his credentials: - Dr. John F. MacArthur, Jr., (born 1940) is the pastor of Grace Community Church (GCC) in Sun Valley, California, as well as the President of both The Master's College and The Master's Seminary. His first two years of college were spent at Bob Jones University. His undergraduate work was completed at Los Angeles Pacific College, followed by seminary training at Talbot Theological Seminary. Grace Church has grown from 450 members when MacArthur accepted the pastorate in 1969, to over 12,000 today. Much of MacArthur's influence is derived from his sermons that are edited and aired over more than 700 stations daily across the U.S. and Canada on the "Grace to You" (GTY) radio program. First aired in 1977, GTY now has a full-time U.S. staff of approximately 45, and has produced and distributed more than ten million audio cassette lessons. In addition, the "Grace to You Weekend" broadcast now airs on almost 100 outlets. MacArthur is also a prolific "writer," authoring a New Testament Commentary series, various issue-oriented books, and most recently, a study Bible (the MacArthur Study Bible). - Here is a list of most of the Theologians that influenced my spirit growth: Dr. John MacArthur, Jr. Dr. Ed Young, Sr. Dr. Charles Stanley Dr. Gil Rugh Dr. Chuck Swindoll Dr. Ben Haden Dr. Adrian Rodgers Dr. Richard Lee Dr. Zola Levitt Dr. J. Dwight Pentecost Dr. Walter Martin Dave Hunt John Ankerberg As well as local Pastors that you have never heard of (we moved a lot). I am a Conservative Evangelical and I prefer non-denominational Community or Bible Churches. I was raised Lutheran Missouri Synod, but after I was born again, I found their sermons WAY TOO SHORT, and those 15 minute sermons seemed like a starvation diet, as I was extremely hungry to be taught the Word of GOD. A one hour sermon seems like the right amount of spiritual food per serving to me. Besides the Community Churches and Bible Churches that I have been involved in, I have also been taught the Word of GOD in two Evangelical Free Churches, and one Independent Baptist Church. I am not sure why you want to know the Bible Resources that I use, other than you want to make sure they are not from off the wall ministries or psuedo-christian cults. Sorry, but if that is what you thought, you will find that I use the most popular Mainline Christianity Resource Library, WORDsearch 10. When I bought my first computer, I was just starting as a Volunteer Protestant Chaplain in a California super-max prison. So the Lord put it on my heart to buy some good Bible Software. So in Windows 3.11 days I had Quickverse, then I went to PC Study Bible, then a small version of LOGOS, then I found a copy of Bible Explorer 3 with a large Bible Library real cheap in ROSS for LESS. What a find I have added to that one over the years as the LORD and our finances permitted; because I continued to serve HIM in the Prison ministry as a Volunteer Chaplain for 15 years. Bible Explorer became WORDsearch and now I am up to WORDsearch 10. Most of the upgrades were free, and I took advantage of their free books, and outstanding sales whenever possible. In my WORDsearch 10, here are the resources that I use most often: BIBLES: KJV, ASV, NKJV, NASB, HCSB, NRSV, ESV, NIV, GW, & YLT COMMENTARIES: MacArthur New Testament Commentary The MacArthur Bible Commentary Bible Knowledge Commentary Believers Bible Commentary J. Vernon McGee's Thru the Bible GREEK DICTIONARYS: Strong's Vine's NASB Greek-Hebrew Dictionary Does that answer your questions?

"Since we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus, and of the love which ye have to all the saints, For the hope which is laid up for you in heaven, whereof ye heard before in the word of the truth of the gospel; . . . . . . . . . If ye continue in the faith grounded and settled, and be not moved away from the hope of the gospel, which ye have heard, and which was preached to every creature which is under heaven; whereof I Paul am made a minister;" Colossians 1:4,5; 23 (KJV) The tiny prep. "if" is used 600 + times in the KJV NT. NOW let's look at what else Paul said, and what John said. 2 Thessalonians 3:4 (GW) 4 The Lord gives us confidence that you are doing and will continue to do what we ordered you to do. 1 John 2:19 (NKJV) 19 They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would have continued with us; but they went out that they might be made manifest, that none of them were of us. 1 John 2:3-5 (NKJV) 3 Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. 4 He who says, "I know Him," and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. 5 But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. First of all you need to know that the word "keep" and "keeps" are in the Greek Perfect primary verb tense. We have no such verb tense in English. That Greek Perfect primary verb tense implies a continual lifestyle of striving to KEEP. The second thing that you NEED to know to understand this portion of Scripture correctly, is that the term "know Him", is a reference to the born again, inner personal, LOVE relationship with Jesus Christ, as we willingly and lovingly submit to His Lordship. And Third, to fully understand this Scripture, you need to understand that the term "we are in Him" is a reference to the born again experience of having been immersed or baptized into the spiritual Body of Christ, the moment we first genuinely believed. NOW you may be able to fully under stand verse 4. Genuine born again Salvation produces a continual lifestyle of striving to keep His Commandments; therefore, obviously the one who does not continually strive to keep His commandments, is a liar, when he says "I know Him" . The evidence that one has become born again is in the continuous lifestyle of obedience. Are we perfect at it? NO, but that is why the verb "confess" in 1 John 1:9 is also in the Greek Perfect tense, implying that confessing each new sin is a continuous part of our Christian lifestyle. Therefore an unwillingness to confess sin, would also be a evidence that one is lying about genuinely "KNOWING HIM" (born again). When one receives the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, one also receives God's (agapaô) Love within himself. It is that godly form of LOVE for HIM that produces the continuous desire to obey God. 1 John 5:2-3 (HCSB) 2 This is how we know that we love God’s children when we love God and obey His commands. 3 For this is what love for God is: to keep His commands. Now His commands are not a burden, No (agapaô) Love for GOD = NOT born again, yet.

Yes, a promise to all who will receive it. Grace is not extended to those who reject Christ. Nor to those who reject obedience in the afterwards of their salvation. No. Grace is not an incarnation. The Word can only be that by the new birth. Grace is the venue for the life of the Father by Jesus Christ through our "yearning" for it. Believing is a variable and can be totally absent without such "yearning". Being grounded and settled in our faith secures [seals] us to God. That is why the warning to the Christian to examine himself on a continual basis. . . . to draw near to God. "Since we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus, and of the love which ye have to all the saints, For the hope which is laid up for you in heaven, whereof ye heard before in the word of the truth of the gospel; . . . . . . . . . If ye continue in the faith grounded and settled, and be not moved away from the hope of the gospel, which ye have heard, and which was preached to every creature which is under heaven; whereof I Paul am made a minister;" Colossians 1:4,5; 23 (KJV) The tiny prep. "if" is used 600 + times in the KJV NT. No, I definately was not talking about the incarnation but RATHER, I was talking about SALVATION itself, that comes by GRACE (receiving what we cannot earn and do not deserve) through Faith. I guess I should have posted the verse that I was referring to, but I thought it was common knowledge: Ephesians 2:8-9 (NKJV) 8 For by grace you have been saved (past tense) through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast. And I think you are serious confused about the new birth if you mean by that term "born again" as I do. Born again or the new birth is a WORK of the Holy Spirit. It is the very moment we receive the gift of faith, receiving Jesus Christ as LORD, which means MASTER. AND at the very moment the Holy Spirit brings our once dead to the will of God, human spirit to Eternal Life, never to die again. John 3:3 (NKJV) 3 Jesus answered and said to him, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God." John 3:5-6 (NKJV) 5 Jesus answered, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. 6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Quite literally the Holy Spirit births our human spirit to become Eternally Alive. John 3:36 (NIV) 36 Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him." 1 John 5:11 (NKJV) 11 And this is the testimony: that God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. 1 Corinthians 12:12-13 (NKJV) 12 For as the body is one and has many members, but all the members of that one body, being many, are one body, so also is Christ. 13 For by one Spirit we were all baptized into one body--whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free--and have all been made to drink into one Spirit. At the moment of receiving "saving faith" the Holy Spirit also immerses or baptizes us into the spiritual Body of Christ.

Howdy, I have only been on this site about three days, and so far I like it. Prior to this site I posted on: http://christianchat.com/bible-discussion-forum/ , and before that I posted on: http://forum.bible-discussion.com/ for about two years. All Three are very similar with a few minor differences. So on this site I found something different that I am not sure what it means. What do the small green boxes mean, that show up in the lower right corner of the posts a day or two after posting them, and they usually have a white 1 or 2 in them?

Yes, a promise to all who will receive it. Grace is not extended to those who reject Christ. Nor to those who reject obedience in the afterwards of their salvation. Correction, GRACE is a done deal (past tense) for all who receive Jesus Christ as LORD, lovingly submitting to HIM as Master. If their receiving HIM as LORD, really was the complete surrender of giving HIM control of their lives; THEN THERE WILL NOT BE A REJECTION OF OBEDIENCE LATER, because that kind of Faith genuinely brings the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and the kind of LOVE for the LORD, which ONLY comes from GOD. I am talking about the KIND of LOVE that comes from GOD when HE puts HIS Holy Spirit in you, which is agapê from agapaô in the Greek. That kind of unconditional, totally self-sacrificial LOVE, that can ONLY be generated in us by the Holy Spirit. Romans 5:5 (ESV) 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love (agapê from agapaô) has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Look what we miss in the Conversation below, if we do not know the different forms of the Greek words that we translate to LOVE in English: John 21:15-17 (HCSB) 15 When they had eaten breakfast, Jesus asked Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love (agapaô) Me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said to Him, “You know that I love (phileô) You. “Feed My lambs,” He told him. 16 A second time He asked him, “Simon, son of John, do you love (agapaô) Me?” “Yes, Lord,” he said to Him, “You know that I love (phileô) You.” “Shepherd My sheep,” He told him. 17 He asked him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love (phileô) Me?” Peter was grieved that He asked him the third time, “Do you love (phileô) Me?” He said, “Lord, You know everything! You know that I love (phileô) You.” “Feed My sheep,” Jesus said. Why was Peter unable to say “You know that I love (agapaô) You.”? John 14:16-17 (ASV) 16 And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may be with you for ever, 17 even the Spirit of truth: whom the world cannot receive; for it beholdeth him not, neither knoweth him: ye know him; for he abideth with you, and shall be in you. Jesus was the Comforter, during HIS earthly ministry, but God's (agapaô) LOVE, comes with the indwelling of the Holy Spirit (see Romans 5:5 above). I guarantee you that Peter had no problem saying it the Day of Pentecost and thereafter. A lot of people trivialize and a few even make fun of being BORN AGAIN, but it is absolutely CRITICAL, because that is when the Holy Spirit indwells us, placing God's (agapaô) LOVE in us. John 3:3 (NKJV) 3 Jesus answered and said to him, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God." John 3:5-7 (NKJV) 5 Jesus answered, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. 6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. 7 Do not marvel that I said to you, 'You must be born again.' I believe it is impossible to please the LORD without God's (agapaô) LOVE in us, because that is the starting point of coming through the Narrow gate. We step through that Narrow Gate, when we admit to GOD we are sinners, mourning over our sinfulness, and out of (agapaô) LOVE receive Jesus Christian as LORD, which means MASTER. Matthew 7:13-14 (NKJV) 13 "Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and_there are many who go in by it. 14 Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it. Matthew 7:22-23 (NKJV) 22 Many will say to Me in that day, 'Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?' 23 And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you (That born again, inner personal love relationship of receiving HIM as LORD, which means Master.); depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness. John 14:15 (NASB) 15 "If you love (agapaô) Me, you will keep My commandments. So (phileô) Love (brotherly love) is not the kind of love that SAVES, it is (agapaô) Love that saves, and seals our Salvation, and that seal is the indwelling of the Holy Spirit HIMSELF. Ephesians 4:30 (NKJV) 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. And what GOD seals no man can break.

Rewards and Salvation are two different things. Our good deeds done out of the pure motive of doing them because we LOVE (Agapao) HIM for saving us by HIS Grace, will be rewarded with things, like CROWNS for sure (the laurel wreath crowns won by the original Olympic style of games), and perhaps even positions of service in the Kingdom (Do you want to be a teacher of the children born in the Kingdom, or on pots and pans washing duties in the kitchen?), and maybe rewards could include personal time with Jesus. Crowns are the most common reward talked about in the New Testament, but you have to be a Sports Fan like Paul to fully understand them. 2 Timothy 4:7-8 (ESV) 7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 8 Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing. Colossians 2:18 (NIV) 18 Do not let anyone who delights in false humility and the worship of angels disqualify you for the prize. Such a person goes into great detail about what he has seen, and his unspiritual mind puffs him up with idle notions. 2 Timothy 2:5 (NASB) 5 Also if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not win the prize unless he competes according to the rules. 1 Thessalonians 2:19 (NIV) 19 For what is our hope, our joy, or the crown in which we will glory in the presence of our Lord Jesus when he comes? Is it not you? Without understanding the history of the original Olympic style of games, Paul's excitement for winning the various Crowns that will be rewarded, most certainly is difficult to understand. In the original Olympic style of games, the winning athletes were not given gold medals. Instead they won laurel wreath Crowns. All the Kings at the games, were seated front row center of the Stadium or Arena. Therefore, when the winner of each event was Crowned, he would walk over to his King, bow, dropping to one knee he would remove his laurel wreath Crown; and he would cast it at the feet of HIS KING stating: "I won this for you MY KING!" We are going to get to cast our CROWNS at the feet of JESUS our KING. Can you imagine you the embarrassment of showing up with NO CROWNS, having to state, "I didn't try hard enough to win a Crown.", or "I let someone rob me of a Crown."?

><>t<>< It would seem, that your entire focus is on self, and your personal problems and struggles; instead of fixing your Eyes on Jesus and what HE would have you do for others. When we do that, we are like Peter when he got out of the boat. As soon as we focus on the turmoil all around our feet instead of Jesus and what He would have have us do for others; we begin sinking into dispair. Try keeping your focus on Jesus and what He would have you doing, and you just may find yourself walking on top the waves that currently are dragging you under, and the Holy Spirit has a way of filling you with JOY, when you are actively doing the LORD's will. I was a Volunteer Prison Chaplain for 15 years, and my wife often commented that when I came home from the Prison, the Joy in me made it look like I was walking six inches off the floor. I am finding others on this site, who are also walking in dispair, so you are not alone in this struggle. You may find it helpful to see how I tried to encourage them:

Read my post #5 on this thread: I know the lonely pain of having no one to love, but it was after I surrendered completely to HIM as my Lord and Master, shifting my focus from self to LOVING HIM for Saving me the SINNER, and serving Him, that He brought a Godly woman into my life. I also know the sorrow of looking for Love in all the wrong places. I think it would help to get involved in Christian Volunteerism, seeking to actually do His will, is the best way I know to bring blessings; and a Godly wife certainly is a blessing. You absolutely want a like-minded Christian woman, and what better way to really get to know about their beliefs, than working along side other Christian Volunteers, doing the Lord's work. I have learned over the years, that when we get our focus off of self, and focus on what the Lord would have us do for others, the LORD blesses us by taking care of our needs. Matthew 25:34-40 (HCSB) 34 Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; 36 I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you took care of Me; I was in prison and you visited Me.’ 37 “Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry and feed You, or thirsty and give You something to drink? 38 When did we see You a stranger and take You in, or without clothes and clothe You? 39 When did we see You sick, or in prison, and visit You?’ 40 “And the King will answer them, ‘I assure you: Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of Mine, you did for Me.’

Matthew 25:41 (HCSB) 41 Then He will also say to those on the left, ‘Depart from Me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the Devil and his angels!

Don't panic and Don't stop Trusting and Waiting on GOD. AND MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL, do not kick the door to marriage open, wait on GOD. You described my personal experience almost to a T, except I am 1 inch shorter, 65 years old now, and back then I thought that sitting on a pew once in awhile, made me a Christian. Someone should have told me that sitting on a pew did not make me a Christian, any more than sitting in a garage would make me a car. To make a long story short, I was 28 when I was panicking for "someone to love". I started searching for a woman in all the wrong places, and one night at an all night party, I thought I had found what I was searching for. Six months later we were married, and six months after that she demanded a divorce on Christmas Eve 1977, stating her reason was because I could not earn enough money to buy her what she wanted in life. I hit bottom BIG TIME, and during the following week, I attempted suicide three times. After the third attempt, something in me BROKE, and I now think it was the PRIDE of running my own life, my own way. I found myself weeping and crying over a total sense of guilt for my whole lifestyle. With the tears flowing uncontrollably, I dropped to my knees and cried out to the LORD, "If You have a purpose for my life, You will have to come into my life and run it, because I can't do it. I am making a total mess of it." NO one in the Church I was raised in, ever taught me to pray a prayer like that. I believe the Holy Spirit gave it to me, when I needed it most. I knew I was surrendering complete control of my life forever to Jesus Christ as my LORD and MASTER. I knew inside me, that GOD was going to do something with my life, but I did not know I needed to get into studying the Word so that He could use it to change me from the inside out. One night at work, I was listening to my usual COUNTRY station, on my headset radio, when I got so sick of those "Somebody done somebody wrong songs", that I changed the station and found a Christian Radio Station that I did not know existed. I found the "Grace to You" program and Dr. John MacArthur was starting a new series, teaching verse by verse through the book of Revelation. In a very short amount of time, I was hooked on good Bible Teaching for life. He was noticeably changing me from the inside out, and I was happier than I had ever been. About 9 months later, quite unexpectedly, GOD, through a mutual friend, introduced me to the woman HE had prepared for me. I knew from the very first night, that she was my soul mate. She was easier to talk to than any woman I had ever met, and everything she said held my interest. We have been married 35 years now, come July 7th. I LOVE my LORD Jesus Christ more than her, and she loves the LORD more than me. THAT IS THE SECRET TO A LASTING MARRIAGE. The LORD first, spouse second, children third, others next, and SELF last. That is right, TRUE LOVE is a self-sacrificial LOVE.