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NostalgiaGuy

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  1. Hello everyone, I just came across a terrifying discovery of what I am going through. There's an umbrella term called "Gang Stalking" that exactly describes my situation. "Predatory Gangstalking is an umbrella term describing a series of techniques utilized by organized crime and corrupt networks to instill mental instability within a victim with the intent to discredit, sabotage, harass, extort and even drive a victim to suicide. Techniques such as mind games, perception manipulation, organized stalking, covert harassment, constant surveillance and even worse, electronic harassment are used to push a victim to mental instability. This optimized combination of techniques forms a type of psychological warfare presently used by organized crime and corrupt networks in business and government. The fact that proving one’s targeting can be very challenging and also that there is very little law enforcement support and training allows predatory gangstalking to be extremely effective and covert. A victim of predatory gangstalking can have their reputation, credibility, careers, relationships and entire life put into ruins; even being pushed to suicide." I don't know what to do. The several episodes that extended outside the family over the past five years has been evident of this. I feel so exposed, trapped and alone. It literally says that the authorities can't do anything about this and my church members have betrayed me, where do I go with this? Help please?
  2. Yes I understand where I have to limit the people to please and focus on God. Really a main reason I got back involved in church. To be honest I have made myself dependent on my mother and vise versa. This situation is very rare and over the series of coincidences that lead me to believe relatives are stalking me and whatever toxic group they're involved in may be bigger than I think. It's just hard to pass this under as some form of bad paranoia from the consistent count of coincidences, though I am able to stem everything to one close narcissistic relative that I don't get along with at all. Everything just leads back to him and last year he admitted his involvement after several confrontations. He talked about the countless connections that he have and how he can circulate things online to where it can really cause career and life destruction. I have several books, two of them by pastors Rick Warren and Joseph Prince. I'll will have to find that Lifescripts book you have, but all these self-help books have not helped me with this situation. I even watched a program on TBN about toxic thinking that really went hand-in-hand with Joseph Prince's "The Power of Right Believing" . I didn't see a change in my life with the new information and just feel really lost at the moment. Books, therapists, and psychiatrists have not helped with the situation over the course of ten years. What the psychiatrists want me to believe is that this is a mental issue no matter my experience, I tried to show them the weird texts relatives sent me and they did not want to see them. So they changed my medication several times and I felt no change in my life whatsoever. Since this is a rare situation, and "if they saw it as true" they won't believe it and will go with the most common explanation believing this may need medical treatment. And last, moving away seems more distant the more I think about it, I'm in debt from three years of college and hospital bills treating a "supposed mental illness" has brought my credit down significantly. Being in this house(as much as it is a blessing to be able to live here) still feels like being in bondage in a seat for the devil to work his ways over me with no stops. I have given this problem to God several times and seems like the enemy have grown stronger and more consistent over the past five years. The devil is robbing me of a social life and worried about making another step. I'm in my mid 20's and never had a friend or been in a relationship. As much as this is a red flag seems to others, there is relatives that are comfortable it and actively watching my activity. I was told what the devil meant for evil God turns for good, but still concerned how this can be changed for the better. To be honest, things lead me to believe they're spying on my life through my phone because everything I use it for, they have knowledge about( the contacts, social media accounts I made under vague pseudonyms, notes, and photos). They use it against me to snoop through my life and turn relations toxic, which even happened with the church members as I mentioned before. I don't want to be pessimistic BacKaran,but my mind is really messed up over this. Most mornings I try to find some peace and go along with my day. I did find encouraging words when reading Psalms and I just want to know that I can meet people and can become involved without relatives playing God over my life.
  3. I completely understand what you say(and thank you for your prayers). What I'm experiencing I can't explain the abnormality of it all. I took the appropriate steps to help rule out suspicion. When I meet my new therapist soon, I'll assess this situation and ask for advice on moving out will be my top priority. Again, thank you.
  4. I tried a bunch of stuff, honestly. I'm still not able to move out as much as I want to distance myself, I made myself too dependent on my mother and vise versa, so financially it is not possible right now. Much of the advice that I got told me that moving out would solve much of the stuff that I am experiencing, but I tried working towards that goal the year after the first time I posted here back in 2015 but my job was not paying enough so right now it is not financially possible to do that. I was in counseling for over a decade and my last counselor was no help at all. It was like she couldn't understand that families could be toxic and wasn't helpful with my situation even if she looked at it mentally or not. The core overall issue has been my mental state when it comes to socializing. This situation here is just an escalation because I am not the "ideal" guy in the family in his mid 20's being in several relationships with groups of friends or involved in social circles. Therefore since my family can't brag about me or complement me doesn't hold them back from being despot gossipers. Didn't know I brought this kind of attention to myself which is really stressing me out. I do believe the family members doing this are VERY tech savvy. I changed the lock on my door to a $200 deadbolt from Finland, advertises as a high security lock and used it on my door. After a year of owning it, I noticed stuff still missing out of my bedroom. Posted on a forum with several locksmiths who know their way around locks and told me that there was no way that it was being picked or manipulated. At the moment I just don't know. Now I got an iPhone because it was considered a more secure mobile platform immune to viruses or spyware, yet some relatives were able to talk to me about content on the phone(notes, photos, apps) and were spot on. I did not have it out of my possession the whole time I owned it, seemed like it didn't matter how secure Apple claims their phones are. They found a way in all my stuff, just to mess with me. Just seems like the most unlikely worst case scinerio is happening to me and since that is the case, it's hard for me or others to understand.
  5. Hello there, it's been a while since I posted here. I went through alot of change since the last post, but to be honest it feels like my situation has only gotten worse. My current understanding is that I have toxic family members that are being more invasive and actively getting involved with my personal life and poisoning potential relationships that I make personally. What leads me to believe this was the several personal confrontations and arguments with them last year that tuned for the worst, and them making subtle hints that they know more about me than I thought they knew. The family knows me personally my entire life, they know I have been a complete loner with no social experience and all the bad stuff I did they don't mind to gossip about it like they're keeping a roster waiting to expose it to the next person I talk to. My experience the past two years have been terrifying with jobs and involvement with church ministries, and the only explanation is that they have had some involvement. I told you all the last time when I worked, they used to snooped my room while at work to find some sort of dirt to gossip through the family, and several times they did make stuff blow up. I changed locks and now they're using gossip to ruin my relationships outside the family as well. Somehow they're using this tool as a standard to keep me in this terrible situation. Of all the corrupt stuff that goes on in our family, I don't know why I am a target(maybe easy target?). I haven't even done half the stuff most people in the family committed and still feel like I'm waking on eggshells See, what most people fear about building a social life is if the other person will like them in the end, and then that person also finds confidence after some social opportunities with trial and error. What I have is family members that are ACTIVELY sharing my personal life entirely to the new communities I meet before I even get to know them personally. Right now am talking to another woman for the second time in my life and so far feel like relatives have already compromised this relationship. I don't feel like I can truly be honest with her and feels like she already been told about me in the questions and suggestions she asks me. One strong example that relatives may be monitoring me was this past weekend, I told no one that I was going to the city for a meetup to talk to complete strangers from an online website about computer stuff, really mechanical computer keyboards. Somehow relatives knew about it and the ones that I do not get along with was the first to call me about it, which scared me how fast they knew. I even had a social media account under a vague pseudonym get attention with random people who knew stuff about me, talking about odd stuff like the area where I lived to my involvement with my church. Turned out a relative somehow knew about that account which I deleted. I faced the same things with the past two jobs. The former job led to harassment and other employees somehow eavesdropping on my personal conversations during breask, got to the point that they left their materials in my work area and I went to my supervisors about it. They wanted me to come in that following Monday to asses the situation. I could not believe that my relatives would leak stuff to my work which I was harassed for. Usually stuff like this a handful of times would be normal for the average Joe, but this have been consistent with me for the past two years. Right now Hopefully this will not be a life thing. What I did do before some of these instances to get my facts right was research on possible ways this could be happening, and found out that smartphones are basically spying devices. Somehow Just knowing your phone number/service provider anyone can track calls, texts, GPS and phone activity without any extensive work(three relatives actually brag about how they can track someone with just their number). Heck, even all a person needs to snoop on you is a good connection with someone who works for your phone service provider. I have an iPhone and went into detail about such potential activity. Apple Store and my service provider argued with the scam that "iPhones are immune to viruses like spyware", but my experience has suggested otherwise. Last year I joined a ministry at our local church that I tried several times before to join in. After finally joining, the initial two months were cool, they shown me the inns and outs on operation during services and helped out on some projects during the months up to December. Of course word got around the family that I am involved in the church. There wasn't strong evidence that there was something going on at the moment, but I did notice that members started to become passive with me, but that was no big deal. Somehow after another two more weeks they began to mention personal stuff about me and brought up stuff that I never shared, stuff that my family would only know. This went on for another month and felt like mind games the moment I make it into the door of the ministry. I backslid out of the service and haven't been back yet, mainly because the members were completely ignoring me to the point I had to force their attention and they were fake with me in the end. Three months after I left they sent a text this past week that they missed me and was worried. I replied back that I was sorry and was going through some mental stuff and would be there the weekend. They did not even respond to my text and left me hanging. I did meet them after service and they still acted like they didn't even know me, like nothing changed between us so I just left again. A coincidence that same day's sermon the pastors made statements that they knew such activity exists in the church, but don't let that be a reason to leave a ministry or something so I might try and go back and try another ministry when I find myself right. Other stuff that I tried to help with my situation is asked one of the pastors at church for guidance. After the first meet, I couldn't get in contact with him again. I've read some self help books that did not help much. I have Joseph Prince's book "Right Believing" and read it twice with various notes and still didn't help. There was a week long test the book gave to look immediately to Jesus and his grace whenever negative thoughts came, I really had a hard time with that. So I had two psychiatrist work with me over the situation and neither helped, only prescribed me meds that severely sedates me throughout the day and my last checkup they didn't even adjust the dosage. So I prayed over the situation since his entire situation with toxic relatives have been going on for five years now, but never actually was resolved. Right now it feels like the enemy has been continually victorious over my life. I'm afraid to use my phone to do anything now. I suggested getting a regular"dumb phone", but was told it's very vulnerable to tapping and monitoring. It's hard to pass this over just as some mental illness, because when I shown all my texts to my mother and sister from these relatives and communities they can't even make sense of it. One last thought is something my political science teacher taught us, was that people are naturally factious and oppressive, they joined together for a common hate or organization to oppress others. Examples such as Nazi Germany, KKK and even have been very popular in smaller instances especially online in the form of some stalking or cyber bullying(guaranteed what might be happening to me). I'm just really lost, because I'm the only person this is happening to in the family and since other's don't have the same situation or experienced it, they're feeding me some fallacy of composition because this is an abnormal situation. Thoughts?
  6. Hello there, it's been a while since I posted here. I went through alot of change since the last post, but to be honest it feels like my situation has only gotten worse. My current understanding is that I have toxic family members that are being more invasive and actively getting involved with my personal life and poisoning potential relationships that I make personally. What leads me to believe this was the several personal confrontations and arguments with them last year that tuned for the worst, and them making subtle hints that they know more about me than I thought they knew. The family knows me personally my entire life, they know I have been a complete loner with no social experience and all the bad stuff I did they don't mind to gossip about it like they're keeping a roster waiting to expose it to the next person I talk to. My experience the past two years have been terrifying with jobs and involvement with church ministries, and the only explanation is that they have had some involvement. I told you all the last time when I worked, they used to snooped my room while at work to find some sort of dirt to gossip through the family, and several times they did make stuff blow up. I changed locks and now they're using gossip to ruin my relationships outside the family as well. Somehow they're using this tool as a standard to keep me in this terrible situation. Of all the corrupt stuff that goes on in our family, I don't know why I am a target(maybe easy target?). I haven't even done half the stuff most people in the family committed and still feel like I'm waking on eggshells See, what most people fear about building a social life is if the other person will like them in the end, and then that person also finds confidence after some social opportunities with trial and error. What I have is family members that are ACTIVELY sharing my personal life entirely to the new communities I meet before I even get to know them personally. Right now am talking to another woman for the second time in my life and so far feel like relatives have already compromised this relationship. I don't feel like I can truly be honest with her and feels like she already been told about me in the questions and suggestions she asks me. One strong example that relatives may be monitoring me was this past weekend, I told no one that I was going to the city for a meetup to talk to complete strangers from an online website about computer stuff, really mechanical computer keyboards. Somehow relatives knew about it and the ones that I do not get along with was the first to call me about it, which scared me how fast they knew. I even had a social media account under a vague pseudonym get attention with random people who knew stuff about me, talking about odd stuff like the area where I lived to my involvement with my church. Turned out a relative somehow knew about that account which I deleted. I faced the same things with the past two jobs. The former job led to harassment and other employees somehow eavesdropping on my personal conversations during breask, got to the point that they left their materials in my work area and I went to my supervisors about it. They wanted me to come in that following Monday to asses the situation. I could not believe that my relatives would leak stuff to my work which I was harassed for. Usually stuff like this a handful of times would be normal for the average Joe, but this have been consistent with me for the past two years. Right now Hopefully this will not be a life thing. What I did do before some of these instances to get my facts right was research on possible ways this could be happening, and found out that smartphones are basically spying devices. Somehow Just knowing your phone number/service provider anyone can track calls, texts, GPS and phone activity without any extensive work(three relatives actually brag about how they can track someone with just their number). Heck, even all a person needs to snoop on you is a good connection with someone who works for your phone service provider. I have an iPhone and went into detail about such potential activity. Apple Store and my service provider argued with the scam that "iPhones are immune to viruses like spyware", but my experience has suggested otherwise. Last year I joined a ministry at our local church that I tried several times before to join in. After finally joining, the initial two months were cool, they shown me the inns and outs on operation during services and helped out on some projects during the months up to December. Of course word got around the family that I am involved in the church. There wasn't strong evidence that there was something going on at the moment, but I did notice that members started to become passive with me, but that was no big deal. Somehow after another two more weeks they began to mention personal stuff about me and brought up stuff that I never shared, stuff that my family would only know. This went on for another month and felt like mind games the moment I make it into the door of the ministry. I backslid out of the service and haven't been back yet, mainly because the members were completely ignoring me to the point I had to force their attention and they were fake with me in the end. Three months after I left they sent a text this past week that they missed me and was worried. I replied back that I was sorry and was going through some mental stuff and would be there the weekend. They did not even respond to my text and left me hanging. I did meet them after service and they still acted like they didn't even know me, like nothing changed between us so I just left again. A coincidence that same day's sermon the pastors made statements that they knew such activity exists in the church, but don't let that be a reason to leave a ministry or something so I might try and go back and try another ministry when I find myself right. Other stuff that I tried to help with my situation is asked one of the pastors at church for guidance. After the first meet, I couldn't get in contact with him again. I've read some self help books that did not help much. I have Joseph Prince's book "Right Believing" and read it twice with various notes and still didn't help. There was a week long test the book gave to look immediately to Jesus and his grace whenever negative thoughts came, I really had a hard time with that. So I had two psychiatrist work with me over the situation and neither helped, only prescribed me meds that severely sedates me throughout the day and my last checkup they didn't even adjust the dosage. So I prayed over the situation since his entire situation with toxic relatives have been going on for five years now, but never actually was resolved. Right now it feels like the enemy has been continually victorious over my life. I'm afraid to use my phone to do anything now. I suggested getting a regular"dumb phone", but was told it's very vulnerable to tapping and monitoring. It's hard to pass this over just as some mental illness, because when I shown all my texts to my mother and sister from these relatives and communities they can't even make sense of it. One last thought is something my political science teacher taught us, was that people are naturally factious and oppressive, they joined together for a common hate or organization to oppress others. Examples such as Nazi Germany, KKK and even have been very popular in smaller instances especially online in the form of some stalking or cyber bullying(guaranteed what might be happening to me). I'm just really lost, because I'm the only person this is happening to in the family and since other's don't have the same situation or experienced it, they're feeding me some fallacy of composition because this is an abnormal situation. Thoughts?
  7. I am suffering alone and lost

    Dear users, my father just passed last night. He was a great father, vietnam vet, and a cool husband who joked around in his stages of dementia. I am in deep grief and need to know how to live life from now. The days feels like blank slates and family has been supportive. I really fear for my mother because she's really in denial about it while her mother is dying as I speak. The double dose of grief made her hate her own life now. Do I need to make another thread because all my issues of this thread has come to a halt after my dad's passing? What do I do?
  8. dealing with toxic family members

    Thank you appy. I never really looked at my actions as showing off, because they're definitely mocking me in various ways when I become present(they hold their hands up and sarcastically call to god). I go other places and try to get my piece and focus but my mother is confused to why I rather be alone. I don't think she can understand even through great efforts trying to talk to her. I feel it's almost pointless. She loves the family too much to see anyone as toxic as they actually are. I might get a break Christmas and go to the theater alone.
  9. dealing with toxic family members

    The house is my mothers' and she makes it open to any member who wants to visit. I tried to make limitations but was not successful.
  10. So far I have a problem with toxic family members. I can't nail out all of them but they are out to destroy my life. Their strongest weapon is slander. Last thanksgivng weekend was the brunt of their toxicity. I prayed, for them and even talked to them but still get passive-aggressive behavior. They even mocked me for strengthening my spiritual relationship after being attacked. They are too connected to my neighbors(which we don't talk to) and most likely tell what go on in our household. It's just me and my parents living in this house. I'm the main target. I can definitely say my nephew who my mother loves is one main slanderer. He has found power in these threats and feels powerful doing this to me. Problem is my mother doesn't have the skill to see passive aggressive behavior so I come across as paranoid and left to deal with these people myself. I keep prayer up because I seen it successful and continue to have them in them as well. I don't hate my family but want to have some peace.
  11. Hello there

    I'm happy to have joined since I have some stuff to discuss.
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