Gemstone777

George, There's so much good stuff in this post! I would give a detailed response, but I think I might write a book, lol.....too many thoughts! Let me just say there are things I'm reminded of that were much needed. Even some that I've forwarded on to others that were struggling in certain areas. This is a really good post started long ago, and I hope some of the newer members can read over it too. I think there's so much in here that it would most certainly help everyone, or spur them on in their walks. Have a blessed day! Your sister in the Lord, Gem

George, There's so much good stuff in this post! I would give a detailed response, but I think I might write a book, lol.....too many thoughts! Let me just say there are things I'm reminded of that were much needed. Even some that I've forwarded on to others that were struggling in certain areas. This is a really good post started long ago, and I hope some of the newer members can read over it too. I think there's so much in here that it would most certainly help everyone, or spur them on in their walks. Have a blessed day! Your sister in the Lord, Gem

Praying for you both Due & Wayne! God bonds us through our suffering! (((Hugs))) Love in Christ, Gem

Due, We should start a club, CCS (Compassionate Chronic Sufferers!) I'm sorry to hear that your lumbar fusion didn't help, but made the pain worse. That can be so disheartening when we think something is going to improve our lives only to make it worse. Pain is such a crazy thing because it not only affects us physically, but emotionally and spiritually. Chronic illness is a huge test of faith and can be spiritual warfare. To stand strong in the midst of suffering and praise Jesus takes great faith! It's also hard not to get depressed/discouraged when things are not the way we desire them to be. It sounds as if you have learned that too...only by the grace of God can we carry on! I look forward to more chats with you also! Have a blessed day! (((Hugs))) In Christian love, Gem

JTC, I am so sorry to hear of all these difficult things you are going through. It's always hard when you lose that person you could go to about anything and everything. Mine was my mother, and she was my best friend. She passed at 51 of breast cancer, when I was in my late 20s. I can say looking back that it grew me closer to God because I didn't have her to go to anymore. Loneliness can be disheartening and painful! I have had 17 years of chronic health issues and at times have had seasons of being confined mostly to my bed. My longest bout of being bedridden took me from a social butterfly to almost a hermit of sorts. It was a deep pit to come out of. We were created for relationships, even Jesus had them. That desire (to have friends) is not wrong, and I encourage you to commit that to prayer and watch the good Lord bring some new friendships into your life! The girl I disciple is a young ER nurse and she is introverted. We started praying for Christian friends, and the Lord sent her a best friend that she was least expecting. Also another friend had a lot of friends that weren't Christians and we prayed for them to find Christian friends and God blessed them with many. It sounds as if Ray is a friend, so that's good you have him. Maybe God has him in your life so that you can share your faith with him and be the one that leads him to the Lord. God can change hearts! You said this is like your church, and I can relate to that. There is great fellowship, prayer, iron sharpening iron and more that goes on here. I've been blessed in the last 2 months that I've been a part of this to meet and befriend some truly amazing people! God is good and provides things we need when we least expect it! I'm sorry that you are in pain and having troubles sleeping! I will pray that God heals you and that you can get some rest. (((Hugs))) In Christian love, Gem

Hi Harry's Girl! I'm sorry to hear that your heart is hurting, (((Hugs)))! I can't say that I know exactly how you feel, but I do hear the pain and longing in your heart, and I can pray for God to comfort you. I did lose my mom in my late 20s, have been unable to have children, and have had 17 years of chronic illnesses. Sometimes life is just plain hard. My chronic health issues had left me bedridden at times which created isolation and loneliness. It turned this social butterfly into a hermit practically! But God lifted me up out of that pit. I still struggle with chronic health issues, but He has given me a purpose in spite of them. I do know that God is the only one that can truly bring healing to any of us. Psalm 9:9-10 The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name trust in you, for you Lord have never forsaken those who seek you. I've been keeping a list of my favorite Bible verses by topic. When I am struggling in a specific area I read over all of the verses to help comfort me with God's own words. Some verses that could help with loneliness are: Isaiah 4:10, Matthew 28:20, 2 Timothy 4:16-17, Lamentations 3:22-24, Jeremiah 31:3, & Philippians 1:6. Feel free to look those up and maybe add some of your favorites if you'd like. As far as the guys are concerned, rejection plain hurts. It's very unfortunate that so many were not in it for the long haul. But, in a way it's good that you've weeded out the ones that are not dedicated and would not treat you the way you desire. I had a friend once that was in and out of bad relationships. They committed a year to focus solely on pursuing God and that they wouldn't date anyone. When they did that, they became closer with God and focused on Him and His purpose for their life. During that year they met someone, but wouldn't date them until the year was up. They eventually got married and now have 2 kids. You never know what God's purpose is during this time of loneliness. God has never left you, cause he tells us that He won't in His word. Hebrews 13:5 I will never leave you nor forsake you. Something I have learned is to not base my decisions on my feelings. Our feelings can be misguided and lead us astray. Sometimes I have to choose to believe what the Bible says to be true even though it may not feel like it at the moment. Also, God longs to give us the desires of our hearts as long as they align with His plan for our lives and His timing. Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. I encourage you to keep pouring your heart out to the Lord. Sometimes we see God answer our prayers quickly and other times it takes awhile. Part of that is us learning to trust God and releasing control to Him. Prayers that your heart will stop hurting and you will have peace! (((Hugs))) ~ Gem

Hi Jesica! I appreciate that at a young age you desire to serve God and you want the church to be all that it can be! It's nice to have brothers/sisters with like mindedness to walk beside us and spur us on while we are doing ministry here on Earth. Most of us know there is no perfect church because they are made up of us imperfect humans. However, since church is for edification of the saints, it is an important decision to find a local church body that we will belong to. Some questions I consider when looking for a church: 1) Is this a church that teaches God's Word and me/my family will be regularly fed? 2) Is this a church that cares for souls of the body (discipleship, ministers to widows/fatherless, etc.)? 3) Is there a place for me to use my spiritual gifts and serve? 4) Is this church fulfilling the Great Commission? 5) Is this where God is leading me to be? Some things that are flags indicating this is not a church for me: 1) I leave service without getting anything out of it, no spiritual insight. 2) If a church is unfriendly, cliquish, respector of persons (looking down on the lowly), etc. 3) Teaching heresy, biblical untruths. 4) Unhealthy or unstable church, (disunity, no leadership/not qualified leadership/unrepentant sin in leadership, financial problems, etc.) I also think in the times in which we are living it's sometimes hard to find the church our soul desires. The things that are not what they should be can be very difficult to process and deal with. I would encourage you to lift up all these concerns to the Lord. Pray for the other young people that upset you by their lack of desire to serve God, that He would change their hearts. Try to lead by example and show them how to honor the Lord. Ask God to lead you where He wants you. Many blessings to you, Gem

Hi James! It's good for you to consider these things before making the commitment of marriage because that is a covenant relationship that you make before our holy God. That's not something to take lightly. If you are having doubts, the best thing to do is to pray to God for clarity and be faithful daily in talking to Him about your concerns. It's a little confusing that you think your girlfriend is great, but your mom doesn't approve of her, yet has never met her. It appears you may have said some things about your girlfriend to your mom that negatively influenced her opinion of your girlfriend, since she has never met her. You may want to ask yourself some tough questions and see if you also have a problem with your girlfriend's depression, arguments with her parents, and that she's not a strong decision maker, and then give honest answers. There's an old saying, "Love is blind," and sometimes when you are in "love" you don't always see clearly the things you need to. After a year or so of dating someone you can usually get a pretty good feel of who that person is. It's important for you to ask yourself if you can live with the negative aspects of your girlfriend if she doesn't change or improve. Everyone comes into a relationship with strengths and weaknesses because we are all imperfect. If you are looking for a perfect person, you will never find one. You have to determine if you can live with her weaknesses even if she doesn't improve, or if they get worse. Marriage that honors God is for the long haul. Mark 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. It's never good to go into a marriage thinking you can change someone. You need to accept them as they are just as Christ does with us. As others have said here, it's most important to know that God approves of this relationship, even over your mother. Mothers are not all created equal, but the majority have at least some care for their children and want what's best for them. Is your mom just looking out for your best interest, or is she overtly critical judging someone she has never met? I do see a potential problem because if your mom refuses to meet her/doesn't like her, and they don't get along, it could make for a lot of heartache in the future. These are all things that you need to consider. Two things that stood out to me is that you said your girlfriend had strong faith and she encouraged you. Those both are so very important in a relationship! You don't want to be unequally yoked, and you want a spouse that lifts you up. If you decide to proceed with your relationship it's important for you to talk about things that will effect your future (spiritual matters, where you want to live, do you both wants kids, finances, and your goals/dreams for your life.) The purpose of dating/courting is to get to know the person better and lead to marriage. If you find yourself in a place where you can't see marrying this girl, then you should let her go as kindly as possible. You don't want to play with other people's emotions, as you wouldn't want that done to you. If after all this processing and praying you feel led by God to pursue your girlfriend, then you may want to pray that God would change/soften your mum's heart towards her. You definitely want to be respectful of your mum, but you are now a man and will have to make decisions for yourself. Ephesians 5:31 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. Prayers that you will make a wise decision and find peace in this matter. In Christian love, Gem

Hi DueUnoHim! Cute name! I have only been here about 2 months and I have found many that have chronic illnesses. Although I am not glad that so many others suffer, you are right, it does help to know that others understand what we go through. I have found that others who do struggle can be a great source of encouragement. I've also met some very compassionate souls that don't struggle with health problems, but are very loving, caring, and empathetic. I created a private Invisible Disabilities & Chronic Health support group on Facebook 5 years ago. We have over 100 people on it. I started it for the same reason you made this post. Sometimes people in the mainstream don't understand the daily struggles. I have had 17 years of chronic illnesses. A lot of them are auto immune like Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Epstein Barr Virus, Fibromyalgia, Psoriasis, etc. I also have a lot of female issues Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome, Endometriosis, Hidradenitis Supperativa, etc. I just found out this year I have a new diagnosis of Asthma to go with my other issues of allergies, chronic Bronchitis, chronic Sinusitis, and chronic Pneumonia. Then I have the heart issues of high BP and an enlarged heart. I'm sure there's something I forgot, lol, but you get the gist. I would love to chat with you! Feel free to send me a private message any time. I would like to hear your story. Have a blessed day! Always, Gem

I've never heard of that, but if it helps/works, I think it's great! Glad she's been able to find some relief!

Life seems to always throw some kind of stress on us doesn't it. Sometimes Psoriasis, or other illnesses are the stressors, lol! Thank you for the prayers and your concern for me! I truly do appreciate it! ~ Gem

Hi Cobalt! Thanks for your response! After having 2 separate beauticians at different shops tell me they thought I had Scalp Psoriasis, I went to a Dermatologist. He diagnosed me with Scalp Psoriasis. He gave me this $500 prescription spray that thankfully my insurance covered fully. I used it for months, but it did not work. I also used the over counter tar-based shampoos he recommended (Nuetrogena T-Sal, etc.), and they did not work either. I also tried Head and Shoulders Anti Itch that's supposed to be good for Psoriasis, but it only helps a little. I've tried Bath & Body's therapeutic shampoos, Puritan's Pride Psoriasis shampoos, Wal-Marts Psoriasis shampoos,) and none of them have worked. I have tried a few Tea Tree Oil based shampoos, and they didn't work. I'm thinking about trying coconut oil next. I have not seen my Dermatologist in awhile because he is out of network, and it's over $100 just for an office visit, plus his recommendations weren't working. I actually have some dry skin, patchy areas on my arms that I believe may be Psoriasis too. Whatever this is, it is like having a permanent case of poison ivy or what I imagine a permanent case of lice would feel like, and it's driving me a little buggy! lol Thanks for your help, and if I find a new Dermatologist in network, I will ask him if he/she thinks it's Scalp Psoriasis or Seborrhea. Thanks for your help and time! Have a blessed day! ~ Gem

Joni, I tried tea tree oil, but not coconut oil. It's one I've been considering, so this may be reaffirmation that I need to try it. Thanks for the suggestion and taking the time to help! Have a blessed day! ~ Gem

Hi every1! I have had Scalp Psoriasis for the last few years. I've tried expensive prescription treatments, several shampoos, natural remedies, and nothing has worked to provide relief. I also have some other auto immune and chronic health issues (CFS, Fibromyalgia, HS, etc.) Was just wondering if anyone here has Psoriasis, and if you or someone you know has a successful treatment to help minimalize the symptoms, or cure it. Thanks in advance for your help! ~ Gem

BK1110, I'm sorry to hear that you are lonely. It's hard for people with poor health to make/keep friends. Not everyone wants to visit the sick cause it makes them sad. Or, they don't want to sit around and just talk, put a puzzle together, watch a movie or the things that the chronically ill are able to do. Add into that we live in a very busy world that can be self focused which can create loneliness. I've had 17 years of chronic health issues and at times have been bed ridden, unable to leave my home for months at a time. It took me from a social butterfly to practically a hermit. I wanted you to know that you are not alone, and I empathize with your challenges! I really admire you reaching out to someone else that is hurting when you have your own struggles. Keep up the good work! Blessings, Gem

Cheng, I'm sorry to hear that you are hurting. (((Hugs))) As the others said prayer and reading the Holy Bible is important to combating loneliness. When we focus on Christ and trust His sacrificial love for us, it helps heal some of the hurt. I believe when we feel desperate it's because God is drawing us to Himself so that He can give us the love, healing (emotional pain), and protection that we crave. What I've been doing lately is keeping a list of my favorite Scriptures by topic. When I, or someone I know requests prayer/is hurting, I share my favorite Scriptures on the subject to encourage them and give them hope. The following is just a start/idea of some Scriptures you could turn to when you are feeling lonely: *Psalm 25:16 Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. *Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. *1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. *Proverbs 18:24 One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend (Jesus) who sticks closer than a brother. *Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. *Psalm 94:17-19 Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, "My foot is slipping," your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy. *Isaiah 43:1-5 "Do not be afraid. I will save you. I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through deep waters, I will be with you; your troubles will not overwhelm you. When you pass through fire, you will not be burned; the hard trials that come will not hurt you. For I am the Lord, your God....because you are precious to me and because I love you and give you honor, do not be afraid, I am with you." Hopefully, some of these speak to your heart and encourage you! Blessings, Gem

Nut, thanks so much for taking the time to share this and include all of the Scriptures. I found it most helpful! I always like things backed by God's Holy Word, and you did. There is so much good stuff in here that I'd have to write a dissertation to fully respond to everything you said, lol. The reason I copied this part of your writing is that it stood out to me. It shows that some of the trouble makers are within the church, and we are to avoid such people. I do believe we are in the last days and the above Scripture applies. I am actually an optimist, looking for the best in people, but a realist in that I see the way things really are. Sometimes, the optimist part is hard to be in modern times. Maybe this is a reminder for me to expect some of these bad things, not like them, but continue on with what God has for me to do. I appreciate you Nut! Keep pressing on brother! You've helped me a lot lately, thank you! Love always in Christ, Gem

You're welcome HisFirst, it's what the Lord put on my heart to share. He often uses others to speak to my heart when I need encouragement or direction. By the way, I really like your screen name! May God continue to lift you up and grow us all closer to Him! (((Hugs)))

I want to thank you all for your thoughts and insights. As I said before this post was just so I could make three posts to get into chat, lol. It wasn't meant to be a place of debate, but a loving, heartfelt discussion of how to process these thing that break my heart, and I believe that Christ disapproves of because of instructions in His Word. I have too many friends/family that have gotten out of church because of grave wounds, not petty stuff. Some are bitter, and yes they are wrong and need to heal, but sometimes depending on the level of hurt/offense it takes time. Being harsh with people that are already wounded won't help them to heal, it will just further show them lack of genuine concern, and they will perceive it as unloving. This is not coming from a place of complaint, but observation of seeing others wounded and wronged, and saying that it's not how God says it should be. Jesus took the plight of the lowly, the sinner, and He was not self righteous. I don't think I'm better than anyone, and stuff like this makes me see how I don't want to hurt anyone and keep them away from Christ, or growing in Christ. I think we all should desire unity, love, and peace in the body, and work towards creating that environment. Sure, sometimes things have to be confronted that are wrong, and people aren't going to receive that well. A few of you have asked for examples of how churches/Christians have wounded other believers/seekers. I have many, but these are some that came to mind. After I share these, I probably won't be commenting on every post, as I feel I've already said my perception, interpretation, and ideas on this situation. I wish you all well on your journey with the Lord. Let us strive to love the Lord and others! * A friend from a previous employer that is not a Christian that I had invited to church said that he wouldn't come. When I asked him why, he told me he that he was wounded by a church leader. He went on to share his story of how when he was a little boy he went to church. He came from a broken home, and his mom had kids by different men. There was a male leader in the church that took an interest in him and sort of was a mentor. There was a father/son outing coming up, and his dad was not in his life. He overheard one of the pastors and his mentor in the church talking. The pastor said to my friend's mentor, "Why don't you take the boy you have been mentoring (my friend) to the father/son outing?" His mentor friend said, "Are you kidding me! That little "bastard!" Then both the pastor and his mentor began laughing. After that he said he wouldn't set foot in church again, and he hasn't. He remains an unbeliever to this day. * A brother in Christ who was single (20s/never married) at the time was serving as a youth leader in his church. He was working with the males since he was a male. He would play basketball with them, watch football games, go out to lunch, help them with school, and also disciple/mentor them. He had no complaints from children or their parents, and was influencing the kids in a Christ-like way. Then, the music pastor felt convicted to share with my friend something that was said because his boys were involved in the ministry and he knew my friend's character was being dragged through the mud unjustly. He disclosed to my friend that the Senior Pastor had said that he had an unhealthy interest in boys because he was spending so much of his time pouring into them, and accused him of homosexual tendency/desires that were not there and untrue. That pastor damaged my friend's character unjustly by wrongful use of his position of power/influence and the use of his tongue to harm my friend's walk. My friend was not as strong in his faith as he is now, and he left the church and said, "If this is what Christianity is, I don't want any part of it!" He left the church for 5 years wounded before God drew him back and used another pastor's love and kindness to help him heal. Think of what a servant of the Lord could have done in that 5 years! Thankfully, God helped him to heal. He went on to be a pastor himself and now he knows how not to treat people because of what he went through. *A single female friend of mine had a divorced guy from her church that played in the worship band over to help fix something in her home. After he had completed the project they were sitting on her couch talking and she thanked him for helping her. He began to kiss her against her will and unzip her pants. She screamed, yelled, and tried to fight him off and he finally got off of her and left. She felt if she hadn't screamed loud and pushed/kicked him off of her, he would have raped her. When she asked me what she should do (because of the nature of the situation) I felt that she needed to talk with the pastor and get him involved, maybe even criminal charges needed to be considered. The Senior Pastor of her church said, "We don't use the R (for rape) word around here. You need to drop this." He was more concerned about the image of his church then he was about my friend's well being and that she was almost a victim of rape. Because she respected the pastor's authority, she never addressed the situation. It made it hard for her to trust men after that. Thankfully, she is still serving the Lord and many years after this incident she did marry. *An elderly female friend that's a widow was a big servant in her church. She had 2 husbands die, one of her children was hit by a car and killed at a young age, and she struggled with depression because of those things. She is a very caring, loving, serving, giving, and sensitive person. Some of the other elderly women in the church did not like the attention that she got because people liked her because of how she served the Lord. They started gossiping about her, damaging her character, and making others turn against her. My friend went to the pastor for counseling for her depression/thoughts of suicide. He told other people in the church (including some of these women) in the name of " requested prayer" that she was, "A sad soul, needing help, and that she wasn't right in the head." He basically gave her enemies fuel to further harm her character and attack her instead of loving her and getting her the help she needed. The church leadership had a meeting to let both sides confront one another to allegedly squash the issue. When they had the meeting only the other ladies were allowed to bring people for their side, and she was left alone to defend herself. She was attacked and belittled in the meeting. Due to this, she and others left their church, a mild church split, and there are grave wounds and disunity in the Universal body of believers. She is currently out of church because of how she was harmed, and is still depressed. *When my husband pastored in the inner city there was a very poor disabled lady that would come to church. She was often unbathed, unkept, and she lived in a home that in some places would be condemned/torn down. Some of the elders, their wives, and suburbanite church people would not shake her hand or talk to her. They would also sometimes give looks of disgust and would not approach her. She sat beside me every week and would give her dollar each week, which for her was sacrificial. She did have an odor to her that was unpleasant, but nowhere in the Bible does is say that we aren't to love people that smell badly. This lack of love would keep some out of church. Last I knew after we left that ministry, she is no longer in church. I could come up with several more, but these are some of the observations that I've seen as to why people have been deeply hurt which can hinder their growth or make them not want to be a Christian at all. I desire for people to know the love, mercy, and grace of Christ. They will not hear the words if our actions as Christians are not meeting the message of love, mercy, and grace. I know God is a just God, and that doesn't mean we don't call sin what it is, but there must be a balance in all things in order for us to accomplish what He has put before us to do. Matthew 5:7 Blessed are the merciful for they shall receive mercy. James 2:13 There will be no mercy for those who have not shown mercy to others. But if you have been merciful, God will be merciful when He judges you. John 13:34-35 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." Love always in Christ, Gem

Hi 4LdKHVCzRDj2! I appreciate you sharing your experience! It's a good reminder that we all have different personalities, giftings, etc. Although it could be taken that you are unloving by those actions, I don't think those are the unloving actions/words of which I am mainly speaking. I'm talking about deep wounds. I guess unloving could be smaller things, but in my initial post I was thinking more along the lines of bigger offenses. I have lots of friends that are shy, wallflowers, and introverted. I get along with them great, and my outgoing nature and desire to include everyone and make no one feel left out seems to click well. You wanna know a secret? Some extroverts/social butterflies feel awkward to and they're winging it, lol. I do think it's good to try and let your actions meet your words, so if you're happy smile, if your sad frown/cry, as it helps others to know you better. Please don't feel as if you're not good enough! We all have quarks, make mistakes, and we are all sinners. Yes, that's one of the key things I've brought up in my posts....that people don't know each other. The reasons they don't can vary...shyness, lack of trust, lack of time, etc. Just as our relationship with Christ is the ultimate model we are to desire intimacy with Him. I also believe that our relationships should be authentic and intimate. It's hard to get that though, I know. I see kindness, gentleness, and authenticity in your post, and I'm appreciative of that. Thanks for sharing what was on your heart and mind! Always, ~ Gem

Thanks for your patience! Even though I can be a fast typist, I'm trying to not say things that can be misconstrued. This type of communication is not as effective as face to face because you can't see body language, hear voice inflection, etc., but it's what we got so I'll take it! I don't want to provoke, hurt, or anger anyone, so I'm trying to be as thoughtful as I can in my word choices. Some of my word choices as I read over them I thought hmmm, somebody might not understand what I'm saying and take that the wrong way, lol. Yes, "disappointed" I think would fit there better. Thanks for giving clarity there. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt cause I need it too! I was hoping to get to the examples tonight, but that might have to wait til tomorrow or the next day since it's the weekend. We shall see. Thanks for participating in the post! ~ Gem

Fixerupper, Thank you for your understanding of my original post. I agree resentment wasn't a good word choice for them to use, but I myself could have used some better word choices in some of my replies. I wasn't expecting the numerous responses that I received, and I've been trying to reply as quickly as possible. I don't have bitterness in my heart towards the people that are unloving, it just makes me sad to see. I don't think I can ever say it's okay for others or myself to be treated wrongly, or for me to treat someone wrongly. Now can I forgive others, sure...I should extend mercy, grace, and forgiveness because it's been extended to me by God even if the people don't. I have friends and family that have pulled away from the church because of the deep hurts they have experienced. It breaks my heart to see some out of fellowship in the body, and some non-believers not wanting to know Christ because of the examples they say some Christians are. Unfortunately, I've seen it too and even been on the receiving end before. I'm sorry to hear that you've been hurt too and seen others hurt. I agree with you that people need to be more edifying and uplifting as Christians. Sometimes there is so much "self" focus in our world that it pours into our churches. My father who's retired used to be a Youth Pastor, and my husband was a Senior Pastor, but is now in the corporate world. He still fills in teaching/preaching at our church so he's able to use his gifting. We too have experienced a lot of persecution. One of the verses that's stuck with me lately is Matthew 5:11-12 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceedingly glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you. Some of the loving replies are genuine, not everyone is unloving. We all make mistakes, and God keeps reminding me to be merciful to others even when they are not to me. It is so hard to do and requires reliance upon Him! By the way off topic, Is your name based on the house improvement show, Fixer Upper? I like that show, that's why I asked! I will pray that God heals your heart, and feel free to pray for me if you want! Thanks for sharing your genuine feelings! Love in Christ, Gem

I will give some examples hopefully soon. I'm trying to go through all the posts, but I can't keep up with you all! There is no resentment, it's more a hurting of the heart (sad to see) for the way our world is, the lack of authentic, Christ-like love.

So he will protect that, by pulling you away, healing your heart, suiting you up, and reminding you that you are his and then he'll send you back out their, to do your part. TO DO YOUR PART. some times we want to do more. He just needs us to DO OUR PART. Trust that he has the rest. He is God. Oh and he will send you what you need when it is needed. You will recognize that true fellowship. It isn't necessarily a friend as MAN sees a friend, but it is a friend in that purpose of God. Nosolostsoul, Thanks for this reminder of rest! Willa (I believe,) also said about time of rest, and I am going to ask the Lord if that is what I need. Sometimes when things are repeated, I look to see if God is speaking to me through others. I also think it's hard to, "be still," in this world. What exactly does that look like? Have we as a society forgot how to rest? Things I ponder in my head. You're right, the workers are few, and sometimes we do more than He even asks. I know our works don't save us, only the redeeming blood of Jesus Christ, but I do think He sometimes asks a lot of us because few are willing. I've never found a friend like Jesus! Thanks for sharing your thoughts! ~ Gem

Reinitin, thanks for sharing your personal experience. I'm genuinely happy that you feel loved! As I'm reading the posts in this thread, I'm reminded that everyone has different experiences. I've been observing both extremes (loving vs unloving) and everywhere in between. If all the genuine Christians you know are loving, than that is a blessing, and something all Christians can aspire to because that is what God calls us to do, LOVE! Unfortunately, mine and many others haven't had that experience. The more one gets involved in a church or ministry, sometimes the things that are not as they should be can be seen. The more you are sold out for the Lord, sometimes the more persecution comes. Also, there are wolves in the midst of the sheep, so we have to be careful for some will stir up trouble and evil. Many blessings to you! ~ Gem