Hi Gotham I don't think taking your own life will bring peace im no expert I certainly don't have all the answers I'm a backslider which I suppose makes no difference to your situation maybe the only reasonable thing I can offer is you, me and everyone else we are only here once in the bigger picture how long is eternity given are life span 70 + years it's a grain off salt in comparison my advice would be to hang in there let God take you home in his good time
well you don't know me or I you I've only been on the group a few days I've gotten a lot off comfort from all the folk I've met so far however I'm going to go personal here
my business was going under I felt I had let a lot off my employees down long story short I took one off the vans round the back off our premises hooked up a hose to exhaust and into drivers window locked the doors left a note on my desk for Jane police were searching every were for me unknown to me my thought process waiting for the fumes to take me was torture I then blacked out next thing I remember is waking up in A&E a WPC had resuscitated me at the seen smashed van window to get in and drag me out that was the 10th off April 2017
ive been given a second chance at life and I'm taking it
I hope you will find your way Gotham