GerdaHannah Posted August 13, 2011 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 159 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 295 Content Per Day: 0.04 Reputation: 70 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/03/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/26/1988 Share Posted August 13, 2011 hi... I was in a relationship from 2006 to 2009. I broke it off because I felt that was what the Lord wanted me to do. Since last year, I have cut off all contacts with that person. However I am on his facebook page strictly as a friend. Now, when I look at his page, I find a girl's name and them discussing topics he likes. I think they may be at the beginning of a relationship. I very badly want to ask him about that girl, but that will make him feel awkward. Its almost like parents who have their children married off and cannot interfere any more. I want him to have a relationship with that girl, I am not jealous of them. I just want to be that best friend he will call up first and inform (such a relationship is not possible between us at this point). I want to ask anybody who has been in this position before, and all parents for advice on letting go. Please tell me how you stopped yourself from interfering. Thankyou. God bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joi Posted August 13, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 506 Topics Per Day: 0.11 Content Count: 1,922 Content Per Day: 0.41 Reputation: 173 Days Won: 4 Joined: 06/12/2011 Status: Offline Share Posted August 13, 2011 As long as we love someone they have power to hurt us. If you do not plan to keep your relationship going you should (in my opinion) ask God to direct your thoughts and energies elsewhere. In His Word, in prayer and perhaps doing some volunteer work in an area the two of you did not occupy. It always help me to simply ask God to help me be willing to accomplish something I need to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fez Posted August 13, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 683 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 11,128 Content Per Day: 1.99 Reputation: 1,352 Days Won: 54 Joined: 02/03/2009 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/07/1952 Share Posted August 13, 2011 hi... I was in a relationship from 2006 to 2009. I broke it off because I felt that was what the Lord wanted me to do. Since last year, I have cut off all contacts with that person. However I am on his facebook page strictly as a friend. Now, when I look at his page, I find a girl's name and them discussing topics he likes. I think they may be at the beginning of a relationship. I very badly want to ask him about that girl, but that will make him feel awkward. Its almost like parents who have their children married off and cannot interfere any more. I want him to have a relationship with that girl, I am not jealous of them. I just want to be that best friend he will call up first and inform (such a relationship is not possible between us at this point). I want to ask anybody who has been in this position before, and all parents for advice on letting go. Please tell me how you stopped yourself from interfering. Thankyou. God bless Sister, and I ask this with concern, and love, are you sure you do not still have issues? As for letting go? There is no letting go to do. He is gone. (see what I mean when I ask about issues?) Contact between you is really up to him now, not you. If it is to be it will happen, if not it won't. Blessings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 13, 2011 Share Posted August 13, 2011 Praying~! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GerdaHannah Posted August 14, 2011 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 159 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 295 Content Per Day: 0.04 Reputation: 70 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/03/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/26/1988 Author Share Posted August 14, 2011 (edited) Sister, and I ask this with concern, and love, are you sure you do not still have issues? As for letting go? There is no letting go to do. He is gone. (see what I mean when I ask about issues?) Contact between you is really up to him now, not you. If it is to be it will happen, if not it won't. Blessings Firstly, I haven't had a date or even a serious crush on anyone since him. An as far as I know, neither has he. I will be a little sad(for an hour or two) in case he finds someone else. But I have no plans of getting back. I also have the mildest hope that God will make our relationship happen. But I am not going to push it. It is indeed God's will. I have surrendered it to God and I don't even ask God about it. I think I want to be his best friend or at least a close friend. I do not want to be completely alienated from his life. I want him to trust me and like me at least as a friend. But if God does not want us to be friends, I am willing to let that go too. Edited August 14, 2011 by GerdaHannah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizzdy Posted August 14, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 173 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 3,911 Content Per Day: 0.66 Reputation: 212 Days Won: 10 Joined: 03/21/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted August 14, 2011 Sister, and I ask this with concern, and love, are you sure you do not still have issues? As for letting go? There is no letting go to do. He is gone. (see what I mean when I ask about issues?) Contact between you is really up to him now, not you. If it is to be it will happen, if not it won't. Blessings Firstly, I haven't had a date or even a serious crush on anyone since him. An as far as I know, neither has he. I will be a little sad(for an hour or two) in case he finds someone else. But I have no plans of getting back. I also have the mildest hope that God will make our relationship happen. But I am not going to push it. It is indeed God's will. I have surrendered it to God and I don't even ask God about it. I think I want to be his best friend or at least a close friend. I do not want to be completely alienated from his life. I want him to trust me and like me at least as a friend. But if God does not want us to be friends, I am willing to let that go too. From the sound of it it does seem you still have some strong attachments to this boy especially if you still have even the slightest hope of getting back with him. I know you probably don't want to hear it but I think you shoud cut ties with him, let him move on with his life and you can move on with yours. Since you do still have feelings for him it might prove disasterous for both of you to be involved with him as he moves on and dates someone else. shalom, Mizz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeCajunboy Posted August 14, 2011 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 113 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1,430 Content Per Day: 0.23 Reputation: 33 Days Won: 1 Joined: 12/24/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 06/28/1952 Share Posted August 14, 2011 hi... I was in a relationship from 2006 to 2009. I broke it off because I felt that was what the Lord wanted me to do. Since last year, I have cut off all contacts with that person. However I am on his facebook page strictly as a friend. Now, when I look at his page, I find a girl's name and them discussing topics he likes. I think they may be at the beginning of a relationship. I very badly want to ask him about that girl, but that will make him feel awkward. Its almost like parents who have their children married off and cannot interfere any more. I want him to have a relationship with that girl, I am not jealous of them. I just want to be that best friend he will call up first and inform (such a relationship is not possible between us at this point). I want to ask anybody who has been in this position before, and all parents for advice on letting go. Please tell me how you stopped yourself from interfering. Thankyou. God bless Let God.......Let God ! If God means for you to still be in his life, it will be...If God knows it's not for your friends best interest,,,it won't In any case....Praise God for his knowledge and wisdom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeonaS Posted August 14, 2011 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 20 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 203 Content Per Day: 0.04 Reputation: 10 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/12/2010 Status: Offline Share Posted August 14, 2011 Before (just before) I was saved I had a terrible crush on a man (I'm married, he isn't). I never thought it was sinful. Ironically, this same man was the instrument God used to open my eyes to salvation. It's about 3 years now and I'm over it, but it was tough and the only way I found to work was to cut myself off from him totally. Now when I see him (we go to the same gym) which is maybe once a month, I can honestly say that I'm OVER IT, and very happy that I am! I ask God to forgive me for my sin every day, and ask for the strength to never go back to my old self. God gave me the power to overcome my weakness, and kept me from seeking out this man. What I'm saying to you is, perhaps you need to unfriend the man. Cut yourself off from any contact with him. Let your heart heal, and keep your head from kidding you that you can do this without God's help. It's Satan's work and he wants very much to keep you stringing along until you fall. Use God's strength to defeat Satan. May God bless you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LadyC Posted August 14, 2011 Share Posted August 14, 2011 (edited) sorry for pointing out the obvious, but if God told you to end the relationship, and you did so in obedience, and now you're finding yourself struggling with questions about his current relationship status, why don't you just hide him from your news feed so you don't see the conversations between him and that girl? then you can focus your attention back on other things. you can't interfere with things you know nothing about, right? Edited August 14, 2011 by LadyC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeonaS Posted August 14, 2011 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 20 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 203 Content Per Day: 0.04 Reputation: 10 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/12/2010 Status: Offline Share Posted August 14, 2011 sorry for pointing out the obvious, but if God told you to end the relationship, and you did so in obedience, and now you're finding yourself struggling with questions about his current relationship status, why don't you just hide him from your news feed so you don't see the conversations between him and that girl? then you can focus your attention back on other things. you can't interfere with things you know nothing about, right? Exactly right! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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