Orr v'emet Posted March 31, 2005 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 26 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,672 Content Per Day: 0.23 Reputation: 11 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/12/2004 Status: Offline Share Posted March 31, 2005 bbs, I know you are deeply struggling with this situation. I feel that continuing in the lies is not the best way to go here. There is no doubt your husband will be devestated but if you trust God to work out the details you can't go wrong. Just continue to bathe the matter in prayer and trust God to help you and your husband through this whatever the outcome may be. God bless you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest angelicvoice Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 if you talk to him...... pray first!!!! then... be prepared for the worst outcome and........you just might be surprised in the end .....not trying to play God but you never know his reaction...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Constant Posted March 31, 2005 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 128 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1,946 Content Per Day: 0.28 Reputation: 3 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/25/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 06/06/1979 Share Posted March 31, 2005 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest D Smith Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 You can not tell anyone.... The moment you tell you become Guilty of bringing an end to your marriage...Your husband will never look at you the same... No, you can not tell,,,,Yes, this means you MUST carry this weight alone, but thats part of the price you must pay. Right now you ONLY have one thing to work for,,,,Protecting your marriage...Not being honest... If you truly do love your husband, then prove it day after day and carry your weight with a smile on your face... Your husband has not done anything wrong, Don't destroy what joy he has when he looks at you by thinking he would "want" to know... Yes, this weight is heavy at times...but too bad, thats just your weight to carry from now on. Your duty is to protect your husband no matter what you might feel inside,,,. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bro David™ Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 (edited) You can not tell anyone.... The moment you tell you become Guilty of bringing an end to your marriage...Your husband will never look at you the same... No, you can not tell,,,,Yes, this means you MUST carry this weight alone, but thats part of the price you must pay. Edited April 1, 2005 by Bro David Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Born Again Posted April 2, 2005 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 22 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 965 Content Per Day: 0.13 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/19/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/28/1979 Share Posted April 2, 2005 D Smith- thank God I am not your spouse. Here's my thing. If you are a true Christian and living under God's statutes, then there is NO way that you can be able to live a lie. The Holy Spirit convicts- you may be able to ignore it one, two, or hundred times, but we all know that God wins out- EVERYTIME. If my husband would ever cheat on me, I would want to know it immediately. Honestly, I cannot understand some of stupidity on this board. On a lighter note (this post is now directed to you, bbs71), read the Bible and pray. We all know one of the Ten Commandments, which is "Do Not Lie"-seems like the answer is right there. Lift it up to God in prayer- you know His answer on the matter- now pray for the strength to follow through. The truth is, when you tell your husband, God will be with you. He will never leave you or forsake you. I'll pray for you. *I think the mods should strongly consider closing this thread before more false doctrine is spread. This will be my last post.* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gerioke Posted April 2, 2005 Group: Royal Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 97 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 5,850 Content Per Day: 0.84 Reputation: 128 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/19/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/11/1911 Share Posted April 2, 2005 Carrying the shame could potentially cause you to fall again. If you love your husband, and care for the health of your relationship, you have to come clean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bro David™ Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 Carrying the shame could potentially cause you to fall again. If you love your husband, and care for the health of your relationship, you have to come clean. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> That is one good advice. With Love David King Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RGR Posted April 2, 2005 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 512 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 8,601 Content Per Day: 1.13 Reputation: 125 Days Won: 2 Joined: 07/16/2003 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/04/1973 Share Posted April 2, 2005 You can not tell anyone.... The moment you tell you become Guilty of bringing an end to your marriage...Your husband will never look at you the same... No, you can not tell,,,,Yes, this means you MUST carry this weight alone, but thats part of the price you must pay. Right now you ONLY have one thing to work for,,,,Protecting your marriage...Not being honest... If you truly do love your husband, then prove it day after day and carry your weight with a smile on your face... Your husband has not done anything wrong, Don't destroy what joy he has when he looks at you by thinking he would "want" to know... Yes, this weight is heavy at times...but too bad, thats just your weight to carry from now on. Your duty is to protect your husband no matter what you might feel inside,,,. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Again, I'm not sure where you're coming out with your wacko advice at, but as someone who has been on the innocent end of an affair, I wanted to know! More than likely the suspicion is already there in her husband's mind and trust me, it will come out eventually-better it be done now where it can be dealt with! In the meantime, I'd suggest you keep your fingers off the keyboard and your mouth hushed before you do help her destroy her marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest D Smith Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 (edited) I was on a Christian Young Married retreat one year. We had a long class that morning about what it means to be married or something, the actually topic is forgotten. However what I do remember is that our teacher broke us down into smaller groups where we split off and took little walks to get to know each other. The two guys in my little walking prayer group were one guy about my age, and an older gentleman who was a marriage councilor. In the course of spending some time walking around in prayer with my group, the young guy started to talk in a whisper about something he had been carring around secretly for years... The boy had married the head pastors eldest daughter about two years earlier. At the time that pastors daughter was the female leader of the Christian Singels club at our church...I was never really a member of that club at the time I was single, however I did know, infact I think the whole church knew that she was a virgin, and that she was very open about this fact. I didn't really concider it any of my business, but in Christian Singels I guess the pastor's daughter has to set a "Good Example" ..so there you go. Anyway, when they were dating the pastor was very Stern about allowing his daughter to get mixed up into a wrong situation, and often used his daughter in sermons ... Now as I was walking with my new friend and the older councilor, my young friend began to speak, he said;" before we got married her dad asked me if I was a virgin?..I told him yes,,,I found out later that she had asked her dad to ask me that..I told him "Yes"...and as God is my witness I never slept with her until that wedding night....However my answer to his question has botherd me, because it was not exactly true. The 3 of us walked on as he related a summer spent out working on his grandfather's farm and of the neighbor girl there,,,and of a night spent drinking too much sloe-gin and the results... Although he didn't blurt it out to us, I could tell what he was saying is that he was not actually a pure virgin 2 years ago on their wedding night.. Now at this rtetreat he was thinking about confessing this to his wife, because he was tired of living a lie,,,but he was hesitant because he knew this would totally destroy his bride,,,,he knew this would causes her unending harm,,,, He asked the marage councilor if he should tell her? The answer was short and to the point..."No, it serves no good" Edited April 2, 2005 by D Smith Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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