Frustrated

[Honeybee88]

Here's the situation:

I am in my parent's house. I don't feel very productive. I don't have a job. My mother is the authority in my home, and she doesn't want me to get a job. I don't have a driver's license yet either, so that makes things even more complicated. I know that God has called me to missions, but I know that I need preparation. I don't know what to do. My mother is discouraging me from college, and I can't go without her support. But I desperately feel that I need to move forward in my life. The thing is, I don't know what God's will is. I don't know just what He would have me to do, exactly the path I should take. My question is, do you think that you have to positively KNOW that God is calling you in a certain direction before you go? Or should I just keep waiting, seemingly forever, till I am certain of what I should do? How far does honoring parents go when it seems like God wants you elsewhere? Are there ever times when you just have to step out in the dark and hope that it's right? I would welcome your thoughts on this. Please also pray for me!

[mathqueen]

My first question is: how old are you? To address a question you posed, sometimes we need to step out in faith and see where God leads us because He does not show us the whole picture all at once. Depending on your age, you may need to see about moving out and having a roommate, of course AFTER finding a job to help pay the bills while you figure all this out. By the way, you don't need your mom to go to college. They have student loans that will cover everything.

[shanee]

[Guest]

My question, depending on your age, is why doesn't you mother want you to get a job? I spent about 2 years unemployed and its not good for your self esteem. I have a job now, and a driver's license, but can't afford a car. In the US you almost have to drive to get to a decent job -- at least in my area. I've had to give up several better paying opportunities because I could not get there on the city bus for the hours they wanted me to work -- THAT'S frustrating.

Why no Driver's License? A license can get you a job driving a company vehicle even if you don't own a car right now.

If the Lord wants you to go to college, He WILL make a way for you to go. Many folks work full time while going to school part time. Taking even one course at a time will eventually get you to a degree -- it'll just take longer than going full time. Student loans are an option for education -- but be very careful that you don't go into an industry that winds up shipping your job overseas. That happened to me, and now I'm looking at being a long haul truck driver just to pay the student loans off.

If you are out of high school, it a normal part of starting life to start work somewhere, even if its just to help pay the house bills. Its also good to have some kind of work experience before and during college so that you don't have so much trouble finding that first job after you graduate.

God's will for your life is harder. The Lord doesn't generally show you the whole thing all at once. Its a process taken one step at time. Have a look around. What options are open to you for work, getting a driver's license, etc.? These are first steps.

Hope this helps.

[stan4257]

But I desperately feel that I need to move forward in my life. The thing is, I don't know what God's will is. I don't know just what He would have me to do, exactly the path I should take. My question is, do you think that you have to positively KNOW that God is calling you in a certain direction before you go?

Well, in your profile and a previous post you tell us your age and gender and name and that you are afraid of bees. And in this one that you live at home with your mother, don't have the resources to go out on your own, do not yet have a job or a driving licence. And all the rest God already knows so that is a very good start.

In my experience sitting around not doing too much is not a very good start if you feel called to do what God wants you to do. Why? Because what God wants is very seldom, and almost never means doing nothing.

At the very least there are usually churches and charities all over the place who would welcome you into some sort of fellowship with them, and even if that is not suitable, the internet is full and overflowing with lots of course and studies that will help you prepare for specialised God's work.

I would just ask God for some help in finding the correct pathway, but in the meantime get on doing something, however small so that at the end of each day you can discuss with God what you have done.

God bless. The important thing is that you want to get going. That's great. The next thing is to start. And the best way to do that is start small because that is where the big things of God begin.

[Guest]

[Bubba4J]

[Trusting Jesus]

Have you sat down and talked with your mother? Talked to her and listened to what her reasons are for her actions. Why won't she let you get a driver's license? Why won't she let you get a job? She should be trying to help you become independent and not holding you back, but she may have some very good reasons for her actions.

My daughter just turned 18 and I can tell you she is not ready to be on her own. It took 2 years for her to get her driver's license because she was afraid to take the driving test. She is afraid to talk to people, so this makes it hard for her to get a job. Her father and I are gently pushing her to do things on her own, but she just isn't ready. Now, I'm not saying that your mother sees this same immaturity in you, but there must be some reason behind her actions. Is it that she just doesn't want to let go of you? You should sit down and talk to her explaining your dreams to her and hear her side of things.

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Nathele

[kat8585]

You are 19 and your mother doesn't wnt you to get a job?????? My granddaughter is 20, and she is driving the entire household crazy because she won't get a job. You need to learn how to live and be responsible in the real world, starting now.

[Honeybee88]

Ok, here's a few more details...I am 19 years old. My mother feels very strongly on the "keeper at home" issue. So, being a young woman, she's not going to help or encourage me to get a job. She's even told my two sisters that they could quit their jobs (not going to happen). I can get my driver's license as soon as I get enough practice to pass the driving test. Here's the thing, though: every family member works, and so I hardly ever get an opportunity to drive. As I said, I have no money, so I can't take driver's ed even if I could get there. I've at last taken my GED, and I'm just waiting for the results now. That is a great help, as I've been homeschooled, and it will really be a help. My mother is a professing Christian, but it doesn't show much. I really don't want to start out my life with alot of debt, and I'm just trying to figure out how far parental authority goes. I want to honor my mother if I can and not go against her, but I'm just trying to figure out what I should do. It doesn't help that I don't really have any light from God as to even what one step I should take. I guess I'm sort of a coward; I find it very hard to talk to my mother about this. It's extremely hard to talk about personal things with just anyone, and I don't have a close relationship with her. How can I move forward; how can I obey God? I don't even know what He wants me to do. I've been a waiting season so long and I just wonder how long it will last. Does He want me to wait, or does He want me to move forward? What is the best thing to do?