Autistic child banned from Church

[Scarletprayers]

There are always 3 sides to every story, his side, her side and the truth, which is usually somewhere in the middle. If you go by the link that man posted, which I don't think demonized either side, I would say that the church was entirely within its rights to do what it did. I didn't hear the mothers side so all I have to go buy is still the link that I read. I also realize that a few people here have children with this syndrome and like Dave know someone with it. But your stories don't not change the facts that were presented about this story. They are not the same story.

Since you asked an unfair question, I'm going to answer it, Jesus would heal him and there would be no problem. But the people in "that" church have to deal with it, and with the fact presented so far, it is unfair to them.

[tah]

Grace to you,

The Mother was interviewed on Fox this morning. I heard the interview she was on the phone. Apparently she has gone there for some time and many years. There was a severly critically ill women with Cancer that sat next to her and her son because others would not. She was not afraid. There have been families that sat next to her and her family just to be close to this child. They were not afraid either.

There is a child of dear friends of mine in my home Church that is the same age (a little older) with the same problem. He is a sincere blessing. The times that he has been loud or active. The Pastor has given him the microphone and I have never heard such heavenly music or Preaching. He is a Blessing from heaven and he draws pictures that would make artists jealous. Yes, he requires special help and even a chaperone at times and yes there is even a Ministry being birthed out for children like him. yet I have never ever felt threatened enough to not allow my children around him. They have spent time in his home and when he has become agitated because my kids play with his toys. He has never been a danger although it could seem that way to some.

I posted this because I have first hand knowledge of a similar situation.

I think we are also dealing with a severe misunderstanding of the disease, the child, and his family. I also believe that there may be a little bit of playing to the congregations fears going on and that is truly sad. ( All in my Humble Opinion that is.).

Peace,

Dave

Dave, I went to church with someone who was autistic also but they did not do all the things this uncontrollable young man is doing... the situation is different...

Again, If I had an out of control autistic child I would make special arrangements when I took them to church with me..

for everyones sake including theirs...

[Matthitjah]

Grace to you,

Tah,

Out of control is a debatable term. This condition leaves someone appear to be out of control. However they are well within the confines of the disease and not a danger when under supervision. The story indicates that the parents have even restrained the child.

The Court order is uncalled for and unscriptural.

As far as setting another time for worship. I don't think the Lord would exclude the child from any service He was giving.

Here's my problem then and I will tell this from first hand experience. I used to go to a Catholic Church years ago. There was a young lady there with a similar situation and she would stomp and shout out in Church. She had a large family. However I never saw anything but Love expressed towards the child. Was there fear? I'm sure, however God has asked us not to be afraid. Again, I believe that the Priest here is giving in to maybe his own fears but may well be playing to the worst fears of the Congregation. I have read the link but what I can't understand is how this child got ahold of someones keys to start their car. 1 plus 1 equals two last time I checked and this isn't adding up to me is all I'm saying. There also appears to have been no problem until a new Minister arrived at the Church.

My dear friends have experienced persecution the likes of this family in the story. They tried several Churches until they found one where their son was accepted and Loved too.

The woman needs to move on and her persistant seeking after the Lord will be rewarded, that I'm sure of.

Peace,

Dave

[nebula]

Here's a link that explains a bit more.

link

In an affidavit, Walz said the church "explored and offered many options for accommodations that would assist the family while protecting the safety of parishioners. The family refused those offers of accommodation."

I would like to hear what these "options for accommodations" were. It sounds good on paper, but how can we know these accommodations were fair?

ran to the parking lot and got into two vehicles, starting them and revving the engine,

Like was mentioned, why did the owners leave their keys in their cars?

Jesus was right, we shouldn't be quick to judge. We don't know the whole story.

It is possible the church just doesn't know how to minister to the child nor the family (they are worried about "protecting" the rest of the congregation, but what are they doing to minister to the family and the child?). I don't think autism-training was a class the priests had to pass, if you know what I mean.

As for the family - I've never had to raise a mentally disabled child - how can I judge or blame them? Unless anyone here can prove they could do better with this child, you have the right to speak. Otherwise...let us just give them our prayers. They need to be touched by the Lord!

[Guest man]

Here are some more news stories.

Perhaps some of your questions will be answered there.

link

[nebula]

From the first link:

Race said Walz's descriptions of Adam's behavior illustrate that he understands little about autistic behavior and how to address it. She said that Walz used language like "urinate" to describe an incontinence problem that Adam sometimes has which is no worse than that an elderly person or a young child might have.

Adam's parents sometimes tie his hands and feet with fabric restraints, which Race said is a technique used by other families and school personnel who work with autistic children. At Sunday's service in Browerville, Race said Adam participated in the service, kneeling with the congregation and accompanying family members when they went up front to take communion.

Carol Race said that her husband, John, attended mass at St. Joseph's on Saturday evening without his family and had stayed home Sunday morning because the family wanted to ensure that one parent would be available to care for the children if Carol were arrested.

The restraining order will remain in place for one year.

The Races haven't decided whether they will attend another parish. "My primary focus is to do the right thing, according to what God wants me to do," Carol Race said. "Without church every Sunday, my family life would have fallen apart. This is what sustains us."

[nebula]

The times that he has been loud or active. The Pastor has given him the microphone and I have never heard such heavenly music or Preaching.

BTW, Dave -

I have to say I just love your pastor!

[Scarletprayers]

Okay, I'm a bad guy!

[Oh Hamburgers!]

If the autistic child is disrupting the worship of others, and is frightening the congregation (which it appears he is doing) he should be given the option to attend mass away from other worshipers or not attend at all. The crying room might be good in some cases, but if this boy is dangerous or perceived to be dangerous (and considering his history of hitting a child and being very large and possibly uncontrollable) I know I wouldn't want a young child near him.

The mother seems to be blinded by indignation in this case, and has to start looking at the feelings of others in the congregation. If she has been repeatedly warned and has had issues in the past, she should be trying to work with the church making accommodations instead of forcing the congregation to make accommodations for her and her child.

[Marnie]

I hesitated to respond to this thread, but I feel like I have to.

We have an Autistic son, although he's quite a bit younger and smaller than the one in the piece. He has melt downs from time to time, he has thrown hymnals, upset communion trays, knocked over plant stands, etc. I feel bad, because PK's get a bad rap to begin with, and Mikey looks like another spoiled rotten Preacher's Kid when he misbehaves. Now, regular members know him and cut him a lot of slack. He's pretty lovable most of the time, but when you have a hymnal flying in your direction because Mikey couldn't handle a loud noise or something, well, even the most patient of souls will lose their patience!

As Mikey's mother, as the preacher's wife, and as a member of the church, I confess I find myself siding with the church on this issue. I know how terribly disruptive Mikey can be, and he's just a tot. I can imagine how disruptive a big fellow like the one in the piece can be. It's one thing to have isolated incidents of misbehavior, even "normal" children misbehave from time to time. But it's quite a different thing to have repeated incidents, over and over again, to the point where people avoid coming to church just to avoid the young man.

I heard the interview with the mother and I think she is in the wrong. She is definitely not demonstrating a Christ-like spirit, but on the other hand, even though I feel the church is well within their rights, their approach to this, bringing in the law and such, is not Christ-like either. However, I am sure their response is a in response to the mother and her belligerent attitude.

I want to choose my words carefully here so as not to offend anybody. There is nothing a church does that is more important than what it does on a Sunday morning. As the Body of Christ gathers, we worship together and we are fed the Word of G-d together. G-d works during that time; He speaks to us through the hymns and songs we sing and through the testimonies we hear and especially through the ministry of the Word. We are creatures of our environment, and distractions should be kept down to a minimum, out of respect for the presence of the Lord, out of respect for others and out of respect for the pastor and worship leaders. As I said, from time to time, distractions happen--a cell phone goes off, somebody drops a mic, whatever, and people giggle and we all understand that those things will happen. However, Autistic people can be incredibly distracting, with their bursts of sound, moaning, repetitive movements, and so on. Out of respect for the House of the Lord, that young should be taken out of the service, not necessarily out of the building. In our church, we have a nursery that broadcasts the service. Mikey has been removed from the service and taken in there. We also have a number of classrooms that are not used during the service and if the nursery is occupied, Mikey's aide will take him in there and keep him occupied, if need be. My point is for the good of the congregation, that young man should not be in the service if he is as distracting as he sounds.

Nobody likes a situation like this, and my heart goes out to the family, but it also goes out the leadership of that church, and the congregation. We live in a sin-cursed world, and things like this really bring that truth home. I look at my son in church; he sits with his aide and a friend in the last pew, platform right. They sit by themselves. Sometimes he can make it through a whole service, quiet as a mouse. Sometimes he is able to go to Children's Church. But sometimes he has to taken out after just a few minutes. Some Sundays he can't leave the house. It makes me cry to see that because I know that is not the way it is supposed to be. One day, when the Lord comes back, He will Mikey whole, and what a day that will be. I can't wait. But until then, we do the best we can for him, and for others. Like I said, this is a terrible situation that should have never escalated to this level. My prayers go out to all concerned.