MorningGlory Posted August 18, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 1,022 Topics Per Day: 0.16 Content Count: 39,193 Content Per Day: 6.07 Reputation: 9,977 Days Won: 78 Joined: 10/01/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted August 18, 2008 I Love You Dear But...... He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God John 3:18 So...... Kiss Me You Fool Oh! This would make great first date conversation....not! Joe, is this how you courted your wife? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest man Posted August 18, 2008 Share Posted August 18, 2008 I Found This To Be An Interesting Take And I Agree With His Conclusion. I don't know how it could be clearer. Marriage is a sacred bond between two individuals. Even if one is an unbeliever, this in and of itself does NOT change the nature of this sacred relationship. In circumstances where a Christian is married to an unbeliever it is the responsibility of the Christian to work that much more diligently to profess Christ in word and deed, in every action and attitude, prayerfully "walking in the light" (1 John 1:7) with the desire to lead their spouse to Christ. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. 1 John 1:7 And Here Is Mike And Kathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyRaven Posted August 18, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 13 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,981 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 3 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/22/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/20/1964 Share Posted August 18, 2008 You do no good by lying to the unbeliever by treating them as if they are already saved. Who said anything about lying? Who said anything about treating them as if they were already saved? You did, right here when you said I interpreted that as to say, " Don't isolate yourselves as a group. Treat the non-believer just as you would treat a fellow believer". You talk about a lot of lying taking place. Where's that coming from? That's not me.....I don't have to lie to anyone. When you behave a certain way, allowing people to draw certain conclusions which are not true, you are lying to them. If a man asks a woman on a date and then continues to pursue her once he has determined that he cannot or should not or will not marry her, he is lying by omission and by action. He is behaving as if there is more benefit for her than there really is. This notion that christians can only hang with christians is just so wrong. Where would we be if Christ looked down His nose at the non-believer? People wonder why the world is in the shape it is today. Now who is lying? I specifically said that one could have non believing friends and that one should not shun the unbeliever. >>>>>>>You can be friends, you can have all sorts of friends if you like of either sex. But you do not date these people, flirt with them or mislead them into thinking they could ever be your mate. And you do not place yourself in a place where you could fall for someone who is not an acceptable mate. >>>>>>>Shunned, no. Not considered as a spouse...definitely. I have a question for you. When 2 christians date, does that automatically mean they're gonna get married? No, but it automatically means that they COULD get married. It means that, based on what I know right this second, you could be the one for me. And it also means that once they determine that they CANNOT marry, they CANNOT date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyRaven Posted August 18, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 13 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,981 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 3 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/22/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/20/1964 Share Posted August 18, 2008 But I would like to know why, and have it make some kind of sense, is it so bad and evil to have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is a non-believer? Because several passages in scripture directly command you not to marry an unbeliever. Courtship/dating exists only to find a mate. You do not date someone you cant marry. Why does this not make sense. I am a bird This person is a fish. Birds and fish have completely different lives Birds and fish cannot mate "a bird and a fish may love each other, but where will they make a home together? " Tevye, Fiddler on the Roof. Birds and fish should not begin courtship rituals, it will end in tears. One will drown or the other suffocate. As I've stated before, not all non-believers are evil God rejecting pagans. Some people just don't know who Christ is. No ones ever took the time to explain it to them. If they don't know about Christ through no fault of their own, what does that say about us? We should at least give them a chance to make a decision before we condemn them. We should wait until they make a decision for Christ before we date them. We may witness at will, be their bestest friend in the whole wide world we must not lead them to believe we can marry them. I ask that question because this was stated. we are seeking a mate, and ONLY a mate. What if that person you see as a God rejecting non-believer is sitting on the fence, weighing his/her options? What if someone had planted some seeds in that person and all they needed was just a little more watering? But the christian only sees that he/she is a pagan and not worth their time, so the non-believer continues to remain in that lost state, searching. why are you insisting that if you cant date them you cant be their friend and share the gospel? Why are you insisting that if you cannot marry them you are leaving them lost? This does not make any sense to me at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneLight Posted August 18, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 22 Topic Count: 1,294 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 31,762 Content Per Day: 5.20 Reputation: 9,763 Days Won: 115 Joined: 09/14/2007 Status: Offline Share Posted August 18, 2008 2 Corinthians 6:14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyRaven Posted August 18, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 13 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,981 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 3 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/22/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/20/1964 Share Posted August 18, 2008 I Found This To Be An Interesting Take And I Agree With His Conclusion. I don't know how it could be clearer. Marriage is a sacred bond between two individuals. Even if one is an unbeliever, this in and of itself does NOT change the nature of this sacred relationship. In circumstances where a Christian is married to an unbeliever it is the responsibility of the Christian to work that much more diligently to profess Christ in word and deed, in every action and attitude, prayerfully "walking in the light" (1 John 1:7) with the desire to lead their spouse to Christ. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. 1 John 1:7 And Here Is Mike And Kathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest man Posted August 18, 2008 Share Posted August 18, 2008 You do no good by lying to the unbeliever by treating them as if they are already saved. Who said anything about lying? Who said anything about treating them as if they were already saved? You did, right here when you said I interpreted that as to say, " Don't isolate yourselves as a group. Treat the non-believer just as you would treat a fellow believer". We should treat people with respect and dignity, not look down at them as if we are somehow better then they are. That's what I meant and that's what it means. I am a bird This person is a fish. Birds and fish have completely different lives Birds and fish cannot mate Poor example....sorry. Even if both were christian, they still couldn't get married. If a man asks a woman on a date and then continues to pursue her once he has determined that he cannot or should not or will not marry her, he is lying by omission and by action. He is behaving as if there is more benefit for her than there really is. That's called stalking. I don't agree with that either And it also means that once they determine that they CANNOT marry, they CANNOT date. Point me to where it is written that a christian and a non-believer cannot date. I'm not talking about marriage, I'm talking about dating. I'm not talking about what is to happen after the dating cycle, I want to see where it states we can't date a non-believer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest HIS girl Posted August 18, 2008 Share Posted August 18, 2008 It's more dangerous for the Believer to date an unbeliever....the relationship could cause the Believer to backslide.... This is why I think it's NOT a good idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyRaven Posted August 18, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 13 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,981 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 3 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/22/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/20/1964 Share Posted August 18, 2008 We should treat people with respect and dignity, not look down at them as if we are somehow better then they are. That's what I meant and that's what it means. I also believe we are to treat them with respect and dignity, which is why I would never allow a non believer to believe that I was able to date them ... because I could not marry them. I would want to be honest. Now if they wanted to ask further, I might explain what I expected of a husband, which they absolutely could not and would not do no matter how nice they may be (they could not lead me in my faith, for example). Poor example....sorry. Even if both were christian, they still couldn't get married. Actually, it was a very good one, for a very important reason. While our humanity is the same as the unbeliever, these things are not what is important when it comes to the nature of who we are. Unbelievers, most of them anyway, are nice people, kind, fun to be around, etc. But, the very spiritual essence of a believer (alive in spirit, dead to sin) and the spiritual essence of an unbeliever (dead in spirit, alive to sin) are different and incompatible, just as the physical essence of a bird and a fish are different and incompatible. That's called stalking. I don't agree with that either I'm not talking about an unwanted relationship, or one which is obsessive, which is what stalking is. I'm speaking of a relationship where the woman wants to be pursued by the man, she wants to be considered as a life partner, but the man can't, won't or shouldn't marry her. He would not be stalking her, he would be leading her astray, stringing her along, feeding her the line, uh, what other euphemisms can I use for this? IOW he is lying to her by misleading her. She believes she has a chance, when she doesn't. Point me to where it is written that a christian and a non-believer cannot date. I'm not talking about marriage, I'm talking about dating. I'm not talking about what is to happen after the dating cycle, I want to see where it states we can't date a non-believer. It seems to me, by the statements you made and the questions you've asked, you've asked me to point to a verse which indicates that recreational relationships with unbelievers of the opposite sex are not permitted. I cannot because the concept itself is non-existent. The only time the scripture ever addresses premarital relationships at all, it speaks of men and women being married and given in marriage or being brothers and sisters in Christ. That's it. There are no such thing as recreational relationships in scripture other than those of brother and sister. Recreational type courtships are unbiblical, because in scripture relationships are ruled by covenant. Recreational dating is not. At first the goal is simply to have fun (go bowling or out to eat or maybe kiss); then you develop romantic feelings and emotions before any sort of commitment (ie, going steady, being exclusive, whatever the current term is). But, this commitment is not a true covenant, it only restricts activities and romantic feelings to each other. It can be dissolved by either party at any time over just about anything. Dating is usually not done under the protection of parents either, unlike the clear scriptural teaching that until a woman is married her father is her protector. In all Biblical male-female relationships, commitment comes first, then intimacy. In 1 Timothy 5:1-2 it states that a man is to treat all young women to whom he is not married as sisters, with absolute purity. He does not seek to be her confidante without a commitment, he does not treat her like a wife when she is not one. He does not ignore the fact that he could be getting to know someone else's future wife, he treats her as if she is until he knows that she is not. He seeks the woman under the protection of her father or some other spiritual authority and functions under the concepts of covenant as they apply to himself and the particular woman. For the believer, there is no such thing as recreational dating at all, because it is outside of the covenant, therefore you don't do it.Thus the only reason for dating is to find a wife or husband, not to just 'hang out'. That is what friends do, that is what brothers and sisters do (without any romantic or sexual tension and feelings). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest man Posted August 18, 2008 Share Posted August 18, 2008 For the believer, there is no such thing as recreational dating at all, because it is outside of the covenant, therefore you don't do it.Thus the only reason for dating is to find a wife or husband, not to just 'hang out'. So when you date, do you both sit down and compare a list of do's and don't's and if they don't match up, you move on to the next person? Sounds kind of cold and impersonal. Like going to the supermarket and looking for the best porkchops. That is what friends do, that is what brothers and sisters do (without any romantic or sexual tension and feelings). Isn't that what dating is? -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just as a side note, and please understand that I'm not judging anyone here, but I have to ask. Why would a christian, who is so concerned about morals, go to a secular dating service in search of a mate? A service that caters to all religions and sexual preferences? A service like Match.com? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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