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bittermara

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  1. Dear Moderator, My humble apologies for posting this topic in the Q&A sector, I tried several times to post this under the Inner Court - Looking For Advice. For some reason, my selection did not go through. I know this is a common thread topic and apologise again for the inconvenience, also a newbie to the workings of an online forum. Please feel free to edit where necessary. I assure you I am sane and in possession of my marbles (pardon the pun). I am seeking answers and a solution, I could probably write a book about my experiences with various Pastors (Pentecostal, Assembly Of God, Evangelical); all who claimed to have 'deliverance' experience. Our private hell has not ended but intensified. A Deliverance Pastor who finally said "Only God can Help You"; we can't, a Deliverance Pastor who refused to continue the session because he was afraid. Some background info. we are a South East Asian family living in Asia. Mom - a 3rd generation Anglican but a born-again believer for the last 30 years. Parents separated, dad practices the "OLD" religion, a potpourri of serpent and spirit worship. I know it sounds bizarre, those familiar with WICCA, PAGAN, TAOIST, HINDU practices would get the general idea. Put it simply, we had more in common with THE ADDAMS family as there were active spirits/demons residing in our home. My paternal great grandmother was a medium supposedly gifted with the 3rd eye. The 'gift' is inherited; my dad and I supposedly have this spirit. PLEASE note I have gone for numerous deliverances, prayed and fasted to be set free from this familiar spirit that plagues my dad's family. My dad of course made it clear a long time ago of his contempt for Jesus. In his words, Jesus cannot give him the power his own Gods provide. He freely admits they are demons and does not have an issue with them. To cut a long story short, mom and us (siblings) have been plagued with not only chronic illnesses (from childhood for me and my siblings), terrible financial distresses and all manner of relationship problems. My siblings and I have attempted suicide at various stages of our life - not being able to cope, loss of jobs every 3-5 years for no apparent reason. Always happens within that time period. There is no history of blindness on both sides of my family yet both mom and myself have been diagnosed with macular degeneration. I was diagnosed early this year, on top of that my fingers are affected. I can't even hold a pen to write any longer, open a soft drink bottle or carry any sort of weight. I have trouble eating. In short my body is breaking down. We will be destitute in a couple of weeks. We have sought the Lord earnestly, begged for prayers and short of ending our lives, we see no way out. Are we predestined for hell ? We need help
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